Who’s Your Daddy (Secret santa daddy, season four)

Chapter 17

Terrence

Yep, Daddy needed me to be his big boy helper so his family didn’t flatten him. They had severe naughty problems, but I could fix it…and if I couldn’t, I’d make Leander do it.

He’d fix them once he realized they were a problem manners couldn’t fix.

“Daddy, do doorbells come in different sounds?” I was pretty sure they did but not sure enough to start off asking for him to buy a new one right off the bat.

He managed not to laugh but it looked hard. “Yes. Would you like us to pick out something that’s a bit more relaxing?”

“Yes, please.” The ding-dong sound was going to make me crazy. “Thank you, D—”

Oops.

“Enzo. Thank you, Enzo.” Daddy lost control of his giggles and they made me shiver. “You can’t do that.”

If I had to do my best to stay big and polite, he couldn’t laugh.

“Sorry.” Going back to his bored face, he let out a deep breath. “You’re just so cute and they’re so insane.”

They’d broken Daddy.

It was okay, though, because I was going to keep him safe.

“I’m not cute. I’m your grown-up boyfriend.” Hmm. “You can’t tell them we’re just dating or something. If I can’t call you Daddy, I’m going to call you boyfriend.”

Or partner if he was a pain in the butt about the boyfriend thing.

Daddy must’ve realized I could get clingier because he nodded quickly. “Boyfriend. Got it. That’s very reasonable considering how stressful they are and how serious we are.”

Good Daddy.

“Yes.” Kissing his cheek was my first instinct, but as I stepped back, I frowned. “We’re going to try that again.”

His lips twitched as I leaned in and gave him a boring dating guy kiss, but I knew I’d done better. “Thank you, Enzo.”

Daddy’s eyes got wide. “That’s weird.”

Ha.

Got it right.

“I can be a boring grown-up.” It was just weird. And boring. And felt stupid. “I do it for work on a regular basis.”

I just had to think of it like work and not like real life.

Daddy scrunched his face up. “I don’t like that. You should be able to be yourself.”

It was kind of sweet that he thought people wanted to see the real me all the time. That wasn’t a good idea, though. “This is the not-personal me. I’m professional and I do my best to be boring. Sports confuse me because I’m very smart, but I like reading books about World War II, and I hint that I’m into D and D. People understand that enough to nod along and then they wander off.”

His head tilted. “Do you own anything related to Dungeons and Dragons?”

“No.” I shrugged. “I don’t let people in my house unless they can see me little. Well, contractors don’t count.”

That had him flashing me a grin. “Luckily for me.”

He was ridiculous…but he was cute, so I needed to give him another kiss. “Boyfriend kisses are firmer and look serious. No smiling.”

He kept trying to smile.

“I will do my best not to smile or twitch when you call me Enzo and look so boring.” Daddy stood straighter and nodded. “We can do it. You’re right. No one has to see my Terrence unless that’s what we decide. Everyone else gets boring us.”

“Perfect.” Now I just had to make sure I remembered to stay in character and not call him Daddy.

“You ready?” Daddy took my hand, still looking slightly worried and Daddy-ish, but I wasn’t sure he was a good-enough actor to look boring at the moment.

“Yes.” The worst that could happen was that they didn’t like me and they finally stayed away when I was over at Daddy’s house. “It’s going to be fine.”

“It will.” Kissing my head, he did his best to look like my boring contractor. “We’re going to handle their nosy behavior as best we can and then leave when it gets to be too much.”

No, we were going to do our best to teach them manners and then we’d leave when they got to be too much.

“As long as I don’t have to hear the doorbell anymore tonight, I’ll be fine.” And I was going to get a cheeseburger and fries and dessert and have lots of stories to tell Leander.

It was going to drive him crazy that they didn’t have any manners.

Daddy kept his boring face in place. “We’re going to look for a new sound. You’re right. That one is…well, I’ve heard it a bit too much.”

“Maybe we can find one that plays a different sound each time?” That would be easier to listen to. “Oh, and you need a camera on the back of the house. I don’t know who to punish if I can’t tell who tries to pick the lock.”

He sighed but nodded. “You’re right. I let it go on too long.”

Because he was too nice.

I wasn’t big but I also wasn’t nice.

I’d take care of Daddy.

“It’ll be okay, Enzo.” Ha. Remembered. “See?”

I was very proud of myself but I managed to still look big. D—Enzo even noticed and gave me a grown-up kiss. “Yes. It’ll be fine and then we’ll come back and have a quiet evening.”

Yeah, we were definitely going to need time to recuperate.

“If anyone asks what we’re doing later, we’re just boyfriends hanging out.” What did regular couples do around the holidays? “We’ll tell them…oh, we’ll tell them we’re going to watch Die Hard . Leander said that’s a grown-up, look manly and boring Christmas movie.”

I was being helpful but Daddy sighed. “I like Die Hard .”

He seemed sad about that, so I took his hand and gave it a squeeze. “That’s okay. No one is perfect.”

At least he wasn’t trying to make me kneel while he watched football.

“I don’t know what to say to that, but I think we’re ready to go.” Daddy stood straighter and went back to looking very boring.

“Good job, Enzo.” He did that so well, I was starting to see why I hadn’t realized he was a Daddy before. Hell, I could see why I hadn’t realized he liked guys either. It was going to be very handy, but it was going to take some getting used to.

“Thank you.” Daddy didn’t seem to understand what he’d done right, but he was smart enough to go with the flow.

“You’re welcome.”

And we were off.

Wow.

They were fast.

As soon as we walked out the back door, several heads popped up over the other side of the fence. They were like gossip bloodhounds instead of the ones that tracked for hunters. It was amazing, but we were going to have to teach them better manners.

Leander could work on that…I was just going to play with them a bit.

“Enzo.” Ha. I’d done it and I’d been quiet. “I think they have your backyard bugged. They found us too fast.”

Oh, one of the women blinked and ducked down.

Even Daddy noticed because he sighed. “We’ll search for it tomorrow.”

We might need to find them hobbies too.

But it was too easy to buy spy stuff online. Leander said I couldn’t have it without ending up on a watchlist where I’d have to go to HR again, but other people bought all kinds of fun gadgets. “We’ll figure it out.”

I was sounding so grown-up.

“At some point I’m going to figure out how much apologizing is enough, but until that point I’m just going to keep saying I’m sorry for all the ridiculousness.” Daddy sounded sorry but he glared at another head that popped up.

Oh, he was young.

And a guy.

That was different.

“I’m just going to say this once.” Leaning closer to Daddy, I covered my mouth and whispered. “Your whole family is really cute, but you’re the best, Daddy.”

He couldn’t decide if he wanted to laugh or glare at me but he knew he couldn’t do either. So he just gave me a pleasant grown-up nod and leaned close to me. “I’m going to find a good way of punishing you for that.”

No giggling.

No giggling.

“Only if you agree to buy bigger pants.” I winked as he huffed. “Thought so.”

Yep, they all knew they had nice penises.

Dicks.

Shoot.

Ugh.

I was a big boy.

No.

I was a grown-up.

A boring grown-up who was just a tiny bit interesting.

“Excited for us to arrive?” Daddy managed to sound slightly snarky as he raised one eyebrow. “I could’ve sworn I heard the doorbell earlier or maybe someone knocking?”

Both.

It’d been both.

“That was your mother.” The younger guy ignored the glares the ladies were shooting at him. “She said…she said she had a question?”

Yep, he wasn’t going to take the heat for their shenanigans.

“I’ll keep that in mind.” Daddy seemed to be ready to let bygones be bygones but I wasn’t as easy as he was.

“Oh, if you saw her, then I’m sure you saw what was scratching at the back door.” Giving him wide eyes that I hoped didn’t look too innocent, I smiled. “I’m Terrence. We thought it might be a cat? Did you see anything?”

Like his manners?

His common sense?

His ability to tell women no?

“Um.” Blinking, he panicked. “I hear my dad calling.”

We made it to the fence as he ducked down and ran off, leaving the women rolling their eyes. I wasn’t sure what they’d do, but they smiled and tried to play it off with one of them taking the lead. “Good evening. We’ve been waiting to meet your new friend.”

Friend?

I wasn’t sure if it was an old people manners thing or her being catty, but Daddy stepped in and smiled. “Aunt Gabby, this is my boyfriend, Terrence.”

Ha.

Boyfriend.

She blinked but nodded. “It’s nice to meet you.”

Probably not, but that was okay.

“It’s wonderful to meet everyone. Enzo has been telling me so many wonderful stories.” And she was the one with the dirty book habit everyone was pretending not to know about.

She was also Sergio’s mother.

Charts were so much nicer than random stories.

She was smart, though, and I could see her wondering what he’d told me. She didn’t seem to know what to say, but Enzo saved her by opening the gate that went between the two properties and smiling at her. “We need to go make the rounds, but thank you for making Terrence feel welcome.”

Oh, a dash of guilt.

He’d done that perfectly, so I was going to remember how well he did it. I didn’t want him to be able to use it against me.

Aunt Gabby muttered something that sounded vaguely polite as she glanced around, probably looking for the other lady who’d run off. She was better at being sneaky, so I knew I’d have to worry about her.

It was generally the quiet ones that were the most dangerous, and I was smart enough not to forget that as I smiled and looked happy to see everyone.

Everyone.

Half the town seemed to be in his parents’ backyard.

Most of them looked familiar from the board, but after a few random introductions, I realized that several neighbors had snuck in for either the food or because they were nosy too.

Maybe both?

Everyone kept going over to the big grill that looked almost professional before they wandered away, so it made me think I wasn’t the only one who was excited for a cheeseburger.

So far. So good.

But we hadn’t won the war yet.