Worth the Fall (Sugar Mountain #1)

DIVORCED IN MY TWENTIES

brOOKLYN

W hen I walked through the swinging doors of the Sugar Saloon, my best friend, Lana, let out a loud whoop and jumped to her feet.

“Finally! Here’s to being single and ready to mingle!” she shouted into the not so empty space, and I grimaced as all eyes turned to focus on me.

Single? Yes.

Ready to mingle? Not so much.

I absolutely did not trust my judgment when it came to the opposite sex or relationships right now. How had I gotten things so wrong? Marriage was supposed to be a lifetime commitment, and I felt naive and foolish for how I’d gone into mine.

“He finally signed the papers?” Bella, the bartender, asked sweetly as she maneuvered around the old oak bar.

She was stunning, her long brown hair reaching halfway down her back, and her naturally tanned skin was always exposed on some part of her tiny body. I swore the girl was just maybe five foot three. It always made me laugh to watch the way she commanded the men in the saloon. No one messed with her even though she looked like she’d fit in your pocket.

And even though Bella was barely old enough to drink herself, I liked her a lot. I’d been here far too many times lately, complaining about the state of my life, and Bella was one of the few people who never made me feel judged for it. Most of the other patrons who eavesdropped on our conversation didn’t hesitate in letting me know their thoughts on my life—that I was crazy to walk away from such a good man when he’d done nothing wrong.

Maybe I was.

I nodded. “He did. But not without making it hurt a little first,” I said, replaying the last words we’d said to each other before walking out of the mediator’s office.

“There’s no fixing this?” His voice shook with the question. “Nothing I can do?”

It was the first time he’d even asked me that.

“No.” My response was firm. Unwavering. And left no room for doubt.

When I’d married Eli only a few short years ago, it’d never occurred to me that we’d end things. Then again, I didn’t think anyone got into a marriage with the expectation that it wouldn’t last forever.

We all went into relationships the same way... hopeful .

But my hope had slowly turned into something else entirely—resentment. And it ate away at me. I started hating how little he wanted to work and get ahead in his career while I overachieved in mine. Eli wanted all the nice things that money could buy, but he didn’t want to be the one to provide them. He liked my checks, filled with overtime pay and tips from major corporate events, but had no desire to bring in one of his own. It’d felt like the more I worked, the less he tried.

“How are you feeling?” Bella asked as her smile dropped. She felt bad for me.

“It was the right thing to do,” I said even though that wasn’t really an answer.

“I really am so happy for you.” Lana ran up and threw her arms around me, squeezing me tight. “You did good,” she reassured, and I forced a smile.

My best friend might be happily married to a Swiss god named Sven, but I knew she’d meant what she said. She was the only one I’d vented to for over the last year. The only person who hadn’t made me feel like I was crazy or irrational for making the decision to end things when there’d been no wrongdoing.

There had been no cheating, no lying, and no abuse of any kind. Those were the types of things that most people considered acceptable reasons for ending a marriage. Leaving because you weren’t happy definitely wasn’t a good enough one. I’d been told to stick it out, that it would pass, and—my favorite—that I wasn’t supposed to be happy because I was married!

But I hated the way I felt. Day in and day out, I groaned whenever I came home from work and saw Eli’s car in the driveway. Instead of elation, I felt weighed down. I should have looked forward to seeing his face when I walked through the front door each night, but found myself hating the fact that he would be there instead. The dread had been suffocating.

“Come on, Brooky. You should be happy. This is good news,” Lana practically sang, hoping to put me in a better mood.

“I am. It is.” I tried to be as excited as she was, but it was difficult.

I was a multitude of feelings at the moment. Happiness was definitely one of them, but I’d never planned on being divorced before I even turned thirty years old. It was more than a little embarrassing. Who failed that quickly at being married? Apparently, I did.

I felt so foolish.

“Everyone is going to talk,” I whispered as if they already weren’t.

She threw her hands in the air, as if to wave my words away. “Who cares? They’ll talk for five seconds before they move on to something else.”

I’d never been the focus of Sugar Mountain gossip before, and I definitely wasn’t a fan of becoming it now. Strangers having strong opinions on your relationship was a surreal thing. I wasn’t enjoying it.

“Maybe you can bring back the whores on swings,” Lana all but shouted, and I bit back a laugh.

“They don’t do that anymore,” I said, shaking my head.

“That’s why I said you should bring it back,” Lana argued.

Sugar Saloon had been around for over a hundred years. Apparently, it was the place to get your whiskey and women back in the day. If you looked up, there was a glass ceiling in one section of the bar, where the ladies used to swing around from the rafters and tempt the men. The see-through ceiling was still intact. Unfortunately, the swings were not. Pictures remained, and they were framed all over the saloon, reminding people of what it used to be like inside these wooden walls. I wasn’t sure I would have believed it if there weren’t so many photographs.

“Let me buy you your first freedom cocktail,” Bella said with a grin as she grabbed her shaker with one hand.

“What about me?” Lana pouted.

“Duh. Of course, you too.”

“Thanks, Bella.” Lana smiled wide. “So, what are we drinking?” She pounded the bar with her fist, clearly ready to celebrate.

“Wait.” Bella turned serious. “Do either of you have to go back to work today?”

“Nope,” Lana said before adding, “And Sven said he’d be our designated driver.”

Of course he had. The man was perfect.

“I took today off too,” I answered.

I’d figured that I’d take the day in case I needed it to sit with my feelings, cry it out, or mourn the loss of a marriage I’d never thought would end in the first place. I’d been so worried that after officially signing the papers, I’d be filled with sadness or regret or thoughts that I’d made a mistake somehow. But I wasn’t feeling any of those ways because I’d already been grieving for months before we officially ended.

A woman didn’t simply pack up and leave overnight. It might have looked that way from the man’s perspective or to an outsider, but that was rarely, if ever, the truth. Women fought until we couldn’t fight anymore. We tried until we were exhausted from trying. And once we finally made the decision to leave, it hadn’t come lightly or without warning.

Men were always warned.

And by that point, our minds could rarely be changed.

All the days and nights I’d told Eli that I wasn’t happy, he refused to listen to me. No matter how many times I brought up the same issues, he never took my complaints seriously. I felt unseen and unheard. We started unraveling without any way to stop it.

And then he’d had the gall to act shocked when it finally had.

“Great! What spirit sounds good? Vodka? Gin? Rum?” Bella started listing off liquors and then wagged her eyebrows before adding, “Tequila? I’ve been working on a new drink.”

“Bella, you’re too good for this place,” I said, genuinely meaning it.

“I know,” she whispered toward me. “Oh my gosh. Did I tell you?”

“Tell me what?” I leaned closer, thankful for the subject change.

“Barry agreed to let me create a seasonal drink menu!” She sounded so excited as she mentioned the owner of the saloon.

Sugar Mountain regulars might love their local beer, but having craft cocktails would appeal to the tourists who inevitably ended up in here night after night.

“I can’t believe you finally wore him down. I thought that old Grinch would never agree,” Lana teased, but we all knew she was serious.

“Right? He was a tough sell, but I convinced him that the drinks would all contain ingredients we already carried, so there would be no extra up-front costs. And I had to keep the menu simple so that every bartender could make the cocktails if I wasn’t around to do it.”

“That makes a lot of sense actually.”

Bella was a smart cookie and had a good head for business. She seemed much more mature than other kids her age, who were still flailing around, trying to figure out what to even do with their lives.

“I’m so excited. I already have four ideas. One for each spirit.”

“What about the real estate company?” I asked, making her smile drop just a tad.

She’d told me once that she wanted to open her own real estate company when she was older, and I remembered telling her to start now instead of waiting.

“I just started studying to get my license. The good thing is, I can do both. Real estate and bartend. It’s not like people are knocking down my door to buy houses from me anyway.”

“Well, when I’m ready to buy something, I’m coming to you,” I announced, and her smile turned full mega.

“You’d do that?”

“Why wouldn’t I?”

“Because everyone says I’m just a kid and I have no business selling something I don’t know anything about.”

“Gotta start somewhere. How can you learn if you never get to do it?” Lana asked matter-of-factly, and I nodded my head, agreeing wholeheartedly.

“Thanks, you guys.”

“Of course. Now, make us something yummy that won’t give us a headache. We’re too old for hangovers,” Lana shouted, and Bella clapped her hands together with excitement and got to work.

T hree hours later, I was stumbling into the Sugar Mountain Resort, fumbling around relentlessly for my key card, which was somewhere on my body, but I just couldn’t figure out where. Lana had told Bella not to give us a headache, and to be honest, I didn’t currently have one, but I definitely might later. We should have told her to not get us absolutely shit-faced.

Maybe that was a big ask. I was supposed to be celebrating after all.

Pulling the credit card–looking thing from my back pocket, I gave myself a mental high five. “Found you, little sucker.”

Right then, I came crashing into a tall, hard wall of... I wasn’t sure what exactly until I looked up. Thomas fucking O’Grady was staring at me like I had two heads.

Shit. Did I have two heads? Grasping for my face, I felt around. “Phew. Only one.”

His lips turned downward as he stared at me. “Only one what?”

“Huh?” I looked at him, his crisp blue eyes judging me. Hard.

“I only have one head, thank you very much.”

“Most people do.”

This man’s voice was like velvet, all smooth and deadly. Wait, was velvet deadly? I supposed it could be if used properly.

I poked at his chest, trying my best to move him. “You’re in my way.” I tried to walk around him, but my feet currently hated me and refused to obey orders.

“You ran into me.”

“No kidding. You’re like granite. That hurt, by the way. Maybe soften up a little, so when a lady runs into you, it will be more welcoming. Like a soft, fluffy pillow,” I said with a grin before poking his hard-as-a-rock chest again. “Ow.”

“Do you need help getting to your room?” he asked.

For a moment, I thought that Thomas O’Grady was being chivalrous. To me.

“Definitely.”

“Yeah?” he asked.

“We can go rock climbing. Or I can.”

“Rock climbing?” His brows pulled together as he studied me.

“Yeah, you and that rock-hard chest of yours. I think I’d like to climb it. Bet your abs are hard as a rock, too, aren’t they?” I asked, no doubt about to drool all over this man’s shoes, just imagining what he looked like underneath that dress shirt. Oh well, drooling on them would be much better than puking.

He made a sound that I couldn’t really describe as a laugh because there was no smile behind it, but I liked it anyway. It really wasn’t fair that all of the O’Grady brothers were so damn handsome. The genetics were strong in that family, but none more so than Thomas. His broodiness suited him. Made him even hotter than the rest. If I got to choose one of them, I’d choose Thomas ten times out of ten. Rawr. That man was a lion, and I’d happily be his prey.

“Thanks, I think,” he said, giving me half a grin.

“For what?”

Craaaap.

Had I said all that out loud? I really needed to get to bed. “Help me?”

His blue eyes narrowed, and a crease formed between them. I fought the urge to reach my fingers out and trace them, just to see what he felt like in real life. I was allowed to do that sort of thing now since I was getting a divorce and technically single. But Thomas would probably throw my ass out of the hotel, and I wasn’t ready to leave. I liked it here.

“Randy!” he shouted, and I winced at the unexpected boom in his voice.

A young guy appeared suddenly, like he’d summoned him from thin air.

“Can you take this guest to her room, please, and make sure she gets inside safely?”

“Of course, Mr. O’Grady. Right away.”

I told the kid my room number and attempted to walk beside him, but I stopped moving as I looked over my shoulder to see Thomas standing there, his eyebrows still pinched together in judgment.

“Thanks for nothing,” I said, my tone filled with annoyance.

Drunk Brooklyn was a bit of a brat. But the least Thomas could have done was walk me to my room himself... you know, so I could practice my rock climbing. And after one climb, I’d swear off men for good.

That got a noise that sounded like a laugh out of him.

Damn, must have said that out loud too. I really needed to get to my room.