Xavier (Hathaway House #24)

Chapter 2

T alia pushed Xavier forward in his wheelchair through the dining room and looked up to see Dennis watching them approach.

“Hey, seems we have somebody new.”

“Yeah, this is Xavier. Xavier, this is Dennis. He runs the kitchen more or less, although Ilse is the main chef in the back.”

Xavier smiled at Dennis. “Hey. Apparently coffee is around here someplace.”

“There is, indeed. And food, if you would like something.”

At that, Xavier shook his head. “I’m not big on food.”

Dennis’s eyebrows peaked instantly. “Whoa, whoa, whoa. What do you mean that you’re not big on food?” he asked. “Food is mandatory nutrition for your body. If you’re not getting that, we’ll have to get you hooked up on my special shakes.”

“Shakes are okay,” Xavier replied. “I just don’t have much of an appetite anymore.”

Talia pushed him to the coffee area. “This is the coffee station. It’s open most of the time. Usually you will find a little bit in the way of treats too.”

“Yeah, treats don’t really interest me either.” Xavier eyed the coffee and nodded. “Black coffee, just as it is, please.”

She quickly poured him a cup and looked over at Dennis to see the shock on his face. “You’re upsetting Dennis.”

Xavier looked over at the other man. “Why?”

“Because food matters to Dennis,” she explained. “And to even think that you might not be big on food will give him sleepless nights.”

When Dennis joined them, Xavier explained, “I just don’t have an appetite, so what am I supposed to do? It’s not as if I can just keep shoving food in. It comes right back up.”

Dennis frowned at him. “What food do you like?”

“I used to like meat,” he replied, “but it all tastes like sawdust.”

“Ah.” At that, the expression on Dennis’s face cleared. “What about sweets?”

Xavier shrugged. “It’s never been my big thing.”

At that, Dennis held up one finger and entered the kitchen area behind the door and returned shortly. “These just came out of the oven. Do they appeal?” And he held out a tray of cinnamon buns.

She smiled down as Xavier eyed them. “I don’t want to insult you, but I don’t know. I hate to waste food, and I probably wouldn’t eat it.”

But Dennis wasn’t taking no for an answer. He grabbed two plates and scooped one bun onto each, along with a fork apiece. “If you don’t like it, that’s not a really big bun anyway.”

“I don’t want to waste food,” Xavier repeated.

“Good. I’m glad you don’t want to waste food. We have a policy about that here.”

“Which is why I rarely even try most foods anymore,” Xavier explained, “because so often it doesn’t taste right. And it all comes back up. Then I feel bad. So it’s best if I just don’t even bother taking it.”

“Got it,” Dennis said, with a smile. “For now just try it. If you can’t finish it, no hard feelings.”

“Okay,” Xavier conceded. He looked back at Talia. “Are we taking this back to my room?”

“Unless you want to sit out on the deck for a little bit and have it out there, while they finish off your room.”

He stared at the deck and beyond, nodding now. “That would be good. Is that deck available for people?”

“Absolutely it’s available for people. And, yes, people like you,” she added, with a smile.

Dennis walked ahead, carrying the plated cinnamon buns and took them out to the deck.

Xavier stopped when he saw all the animals in the pastures. “Good Lord.” He took several slow, deep breaths. “So I’m allowed to sit on the deck?”

“You are, as long as the kitchen’s open,” Dennis clarified. “I do lock it up overnight, but, other than that, I’m here early, and I generally don’t leave until late either.”

At that, Talia laughed. “Honestly, he’s always here. So if you need anything from the kitchen, he’s the one to help you.” She studied Xavier’s features, as he stared at Dennis, wondering at the luck. She leaned over and added, “Yes, he means it. Everybody here does.”

Xavier nodded slowly but hesitantly, as if not sure how to react.

She’d seen it every once in a while with new patients, but nothing quite so pronounced as this time. She asked him, “Are you okay?”

“I’m okay,” he stated, shaking off whatever was bothering him. “It’ll just take a bit to get used to a new system.”

“It will,” Dennis agreed. “Still, I think you’ll adjust faster than you expect.” And, with that, Dennis turned and walked away.

*

Xavier turned to Talia. “Did I insult him?”

“Dennis is fine, just worried about all of us,” she said. “He’ll watch you like a hawk to see what foods you readily eat and what others he can tempt you to eat.”

“I just don’t want to waste anything,” he mentioned once again. “The VA really jumped on us about the waste.”

“Curtailing the waste is important, but here it’s not quite such a stringent deal.”

“It should be though, maybe,” he pointed out. “Food shouldn’t be wasted, not with all the hungry people in the world.”

“And I get that. Now are you more worried about the environment, about the cost, or just the fact that some food ends up as no good to anybody?”

He shrugged. “I don’t have any right to be worried about anything. My plate’s pretty full just thinking about trying to get through my days,” he explained in a quiet tone. “But I guess it just feels wrong to think of people all over the world needing food, and here I’ve got so much that I take it and don’t eat it. So I feel compelled to eat it, but then I don’t usually enjoy it.”

“Don’t eat food if you don’t enjoy it,” she declared. “Nobody’ll force you into that. And, if it comes down to you not eating enough, then that’s a whole different story, but that’s not my problem. That’s between you and your doctors.”

Xavier nodded. “It hasn’t come to that. Yet all the food tastes like sawdust to me, so then I just can’t get it down. Or maybe it’s because I know it’ll come back up.”

“Yet our food is delicious, so I don’t know how any of it could possibly taste like sawdust. Believe me, these guys know how to cook.”

He looked at her doubtfully.

She smiled. “You don’t have to take my word for it,” she muttered. “Just try the cinnamon bun.”

“And if I don’t like it?” he asked hesitantly, staring down at the treat. Yet, when he sniffed the air, he started to smile. “It does smell good.”

“It should more than smell good,” she said, as she sat beside Xavier and ripped into hers. “It tastes wonderful.”

He watched as she devoured hers and asked, “Am I taking you away from work?”

She shook her head. “Nope, not right now you aren’t. So don’t worry about me. Just enjoy your coffee and your cinnamon bun. Everything else is secondary.”

He wasn’t even sure what to think about that because, in his world, everything was secondary to his health and his rehab. He had a schedule to adhere to, to focus on exactly what needed to be done at that moment. But it seemed fairly relaxed here at Hathaway. At least for right now. He took a bite of the cinnamon bun, a small one, and frowned. Then he took another bite. “It’s nice and fresh,” he noted.

“It is, and everybody here really enjoys their groceries, so you’ll find all kinds of extra treats on a regular basis.”

“Ah, and that probably is why Dennis was shocked that I don’t generally eat much.”

“Of course, but that’s okay. If you’re not happy eating the food on offer here on any given day, then tell Dennis what you want. I don’t know how much individual catering he can do because the kitchen prepares a large amount of food for a large amount of people every day, three times a day. Still, we try to accommodate everyone. If he can get you something different, he’ll do it because he’s a nice guy, just like the rest of us.”

He frowned at her, and she nodded. “We have a very different place here,” she explained. “And I get that that may sound cliché, but it’s really not. It won’t take you long to adjust, so give yourself some time and just relax with it all.”

Xavier thought about her words long after he had been shown to his assigned room and left in peace and quiet. So far he’d been impressed with the place, not so much about the location—although the glimpse he’d caught outside made him want to go to the grassy yard and just spend time sitting there with the animals. However, he had been more impressed with the people, the staff, and the apparent caring in their hearts. He figured it would wear off soon enough. He was used to more indifference than anything else from medical personnel. However, already Xavier felt as if the staff here was friendlier, not so much of a working relationship.

And there was both good and bad to that. It was good as long as everything worked, but the minute a problem surfaced, it sucked because then you didn’t want to complain because they were friends. Yet, if they weren’t doing their job, that made for a much tougher environment to live in.

Xavier wasn’t a complainer by nature, but he’d certainly complained lots on Zander’s behalf. Zander needed more. He needed his bedding changed more often, and he needed an extra hand with his shower. His body was way weaker, his muscles atrophied. Yet every time Xavier had gone to bat for Zander, his buddy got mad and said that he was fine. But he wasn’t fine. He just always said that because he didn’t want to cause anybody any extra trouble.

Xavier was sure that’s why Zander ended up even sicker. He should have been looking after himself and should have reminded the staff to do that too. But then who was Xavier to talk? He was here, in his own room, wondering why he’d even bothered leaving his buddy, when this move should be about him and not Zander.

However, Xavier was always wondering if Zander was okay, wondering if he would get out of that hospital before he needed more drugs. Zander was a good guy, but he couldn’t fight for himself. Thus, with Xavier leaving him behind, it felt as if Xavier had deserted Zander. Xavier felt like a heel all over again.