A Break in Communications

Chapter 18

Lucy

I was pretty sure I was dreaming this whole thing—that I’d hit the level of sleep-deprived where I’d just crashed onto a couch in the waiting room and I’d had a beautiful dream of Anna Preston showing up and telling me she wanted me to be okay and that she was going to help me.

So imagine my confusion when I woke up in the middle of the afternoon on the couch back at the house and saw, over the sofa arm and in the kitchen, Anna Preston in the kitchen wearing headphones and humming something to herself as she cooked.

Honestly, all things considered, that was a bad sign. I must have fallen asleep going down the stairs, hit my head and died, and somehow the papers had gotten mixed up and I’d been let into heaven. I hoped someone would be available to look after Grandma. Maybe she’d seduce Elliott the nurse after all.

Anna glanced back my way, reaching for the spice rack on the kitchen island, and she paused, seeing me, before she relaxed into a small smile. “You need more sleep,” she said, tugging her headphones off and sliding them down over her neck. “Pretend I’m not here.”

“Are you… making chili?” I said, my voice groggy, sniffing at the rich scent of tomato in the air. She put her hands up like I was accusing her of something.

“Hey, you started this chili thing. Now I have to come up with a secret recipe. I’m very mad at you for that, you know.”

She didn’t sound mad at all. Sounded more like playful teasing from a lover. I’d definitely died. Guess it was no surprise that Heaven itself couldn’t render a version of Anna Preston more perfect than the one that lived on earth. “I think you can find it in your heart to forgive me.”

She rolled her eyes, smiling drily, as she went back to the stock pot on the stove. “I hear you’ve been barely sleeping and subsisting off vending machine food. I’m not forgiving you for that. Why did you go back to your house and sleep on the couch instead of bed?”

“Ah… I’d have slept too much if I took the bed.”

“Always the overachiever, Lucy.” She tossed something into the pot, stirred it, gave it a taste, and covered it to turn around and face me, folding her arms and giving me a serious look. “Talked to insurance, and they’re being dicks, but I think I’ve made some headway. Got to chat with orthopedics a bit and work out what your grandmother’s long-term care looks like, because this is unsustainable, but we’ll go over the options together and see what works best. Got a bit of time in to clean up around this place, and I’m trying to make sure not only does your grandmother eat properly, but that you do too.”

I stared at her blankly for a while, trying to make the pieces fit together in my mind, like trying really hard to make the square peg go in the round hole. Finally, Anna flushed, furrowing her brow.

“What? Quit… staring like that.”

“Are you really… doing all this just because you want competition for the promotion?”

“Ugh—” She looked away. “It just doesn’t feel right otherwise.”

Did that mean Anna wasn’t going away just because of the promotion? Because if this meant Anna wanted me in her life somehow or other—no matter what it looked like—I’d do anything to make it work. I stood up, slowly, every muscle in my body aching, and I walked into the kitchen to where Anna was busying herself with the chili, stirring it when I was pretty sure it didn’t need stirring. Looked delicious, too.

“It smells great,” I said, leaning on the counter next to her. “Is that… you put cloves?”

“I asked your grandmother if she knows anything about how you like it…” she mumbled, keeping her gaze straight down on the pot of chili. “I figured I’d try to get back at you for making eggs the way I liked them.”

That… did not make sense. But I didn’t need it to. “Anna—don’t you have a lot going on at work?”

“I can multitask. I have things taken care of there for long enough that I can make sure you’re not keeling over.” She turned with a heavy sigh, and she met my gaze with such a loaded look that it gave my heart wild flips, butterflies in my stomach. “Look, Lucy, I just—it’s—” She faltered, and I raised my eyebrows.

“Is everything okay?”

She pursed her lips, looking away. “Just because of what I said, doesn’t mean I’m not… it’s… ugh—forget it,” she said, waving me off, turning back to the chili. “This is probably as good as it’s going to get. You go sit down and I’ll serve you a bowl, bring your grandmother some, and I’ll come back to go over the long-term care plans with you or, if you’re asleep then, I’ll just stay here and do some work so I can be on standby if you keel over or something.”

“I can serve myself a bowl—”

“Go put your ass in the chair, Masters.”

Something about my last name suddenly had a more flirtatious edge to it than it normally had. Or maybe it was just my imagination, seeing as how this whole thing was just a fever dream anyway. I guess I was still drunk on the fever dream of it all, because I smiled at her and said, “Try not to spend too much time thinking about my ass, Preston.”

She turned back to the cupboard, pulling down a bowl and starting about serving it, and said, “I’ll think about what I like. What, are you going to tell me to stop?”

Well, I’d be cooperative and sit down after all if that was how we were doing this. I turned around slowly, arching my back a little as I walked with a bit of a hip sway to my chair. “Not at all,” I said. “Feel free to look if you want inspiration.”

She had a bowl of chili set down for me before long, and she wasn’t done treating me, because she packed up a big glass container of it and turned to the door, mirroring my posture with her back to me. “I’m going to take this and be back soon,” she said, looking over her shoulder at me, where I was fully staring at her ass.

“Making sure I spend that whole time thinking about you?”

“Fair’s fair. As if you’d stop thinking about me either way, though.”

She had me read for filth, but did she have to point it out?

Well, it wasn’t like I was being subtle. “I’ll miss you,” I called after her as she slipped through the door and into the foyer. Her voice called back distantly.

“If you’re lucky, I might even miss you too,” she said, and as I tucked into an absolutely delicious bowl of chili, I thought about how that did sound like a very lucky experience.

Honestly, Anna Preston might have had me beat. She knew how to make some damn good food. Even Grandma would be happy. Wished I could be there to see it, but—well, she’d pretend to be crotchety and hate it if I were there watching, anyway. I’d have to step up my cooking game if I wanted to keep Anna on the back foot. I knew she wouldn’t have forgiven me if I’d rolled over and let her take a victory, anyway.

I might have just been biased because I was in love with her, though. But that was details.

I cleaned up the dishes once I was done, and I didn’t want to lose in this whole thing, so I popped into the car and headed to the shop down the street, grabbing what I needed—just a little something to get a leg up on Anna Preston—and when I finished setting up in the cozy nook by the window in the bedroom with some freshly purchased Guatemalan single-origin coffee, I got my laptop, sat down in the nook I’d stocked full of pillows and blankets, and I took my laptop to take advantage of the second to get back to my work.

Or I tried, anyway. The numbers and designs swam on the pages, and the gently drifting snowflakes picking up outside the window, night settling in at the edges of the horizon, it lulled me into a false sense of security, and it tricked me into setting the laptop aside to close my eyes and rest my head on the pillow for just one second, and the next thing I knew, I was stirring from a light sleep to the sound of the bedroom door opening, Anna’s voice coming in.

“Lucy?” she called softly. “Tell me you’re not working in here.”

I was supposed to be—I jolted back to awareness, looking at my laptop, and I sat up to where Anna pushed into the room, stopping with a double take, blinking fast.

“Masters… you spend a lot of time sleeping on the floor?”

Can’t have been out for more than ten minutes—my coffee was still warm, and I clutched it as I stood up. “Was… taking advantage of the opening you’d left me and trying to catch up on your schemes, of course.”

Anna put her hands on her hips, standing in the doorway with a stern look. She could have given me a stern look anytime… “You were working,” she said. “Do you know how to rest? Ever?”

“And let you get ahead?” I smiled, folding my arms. “Besides, don’t you like a girl who’s good at her work?”

“Ha.” Anna looked away, rolling her eyes with a dry smile. “Whatever. Judging by your hair, your body decided to take a nap for you.”

“I was just closing my eyes to reflect deeply on the nature of the work.”

She laughed. “I’m going to smack you,” she said good-naturedly. “Fine. Admittedly, I would really start worrying about you if you actually took off from work. Your grandmother’s doing well. Said the chili was fine enough, she supposes. ”

I whistled low. “Damn, woman might start trying to marry you herself. Never seen her so obsessed with somebody.”

Anna made a face. “Look, I don’t mind older women, but… there’s a limit.”

“Thanks for the chili. From both of us, since I assume she didn’t say thank you. And, uh… thanks. For all the help.” I looked away. “I’m not good at saying the words thank you , so I decided to one-up you instead.”

Anna’s shoulders fell. “Oh, god, Lucy, what did you do?”

“Don’t typically lie on the floor. But a little bird told me you really like nestling in a cozy little nook with a good book and a lot of pillows to watch the snow fall.” I stepped out of the way, gesturing her to the setup, mattress topper laid on the floor with thick, fuzzy quilts and pillows, some of which I’d had to buy new to get Anna Preston-worthy levels of coziness. “Was picking up more coffee while I was out, and I saw they had the Guatemalan… so I figured I might as well.”

Anna shot me a look of disbelief, eyes flicking between me and the reading corner, and she said, “Lucy Masters. You’re falling apart at the seams, and you’re still going around stealing gossip from my family behind my back to try one-upping me?”

“And the snickerdoodles, well,” I said, gesturing casually to the table, “those just fell into my hands as I was walking out of the store. Could have happened to anybody.”

“Unbelievable,” she laughed. “Will you let anyone look after you?”

I shrugged, playing it cool. “If I have the chance to catch up any extra energy, darling, of course I’m spending it to spoil you. Now, are we starting with some reading or are we starting with working together on that press release? You haven’t been able to focus on it as well without some competition, have you?”

Anna sighed, rolling her eyes, looking away. “It’s not that.”

“Oh, is it not?” I said, leaning against the wall with the most smug, satisfied little smile anyone had ever smiled, until Anna stopped me completely in my tracks with a muttered,

“It’s not that it’s easier to focus with competition around, it’s that it’s easier to focus with you around.”

I blinked, slowly, trying to get my head around the words. “What?” Judging by my response, I didn’t make it.

“Seems your hearing’s going. Maybe get it checked while you’re in the eldercare ward,” she said, striding past me and sitting down with her laptop bag in the space I’d set up. “Let’s start with the press release work. You can give me your opinion on the format, if you think I truly must hear your opinion.”

Anna Preston wanted my opinion. And couldn’t focus without me around. Was I high? On what? Because I needed more of whatever it was. “You know, dearest,” I said, sitting down next to her, “you can just say I value your opinion and want to hear it. ”

“Hm. I guess I could say that, if I wanted to. Time will tell.”

I nudged her, sitting up as close to her side as I dared. “Try not to flirt with me too much.”

She opened her laptop, not looking at me. “I’ll flirt as much as I damn well please, Masters.”

That meant Anna Preston was flirting with me. Jesus Christ. “Just keep in mind I’m going to take it as a challenge and try to one-up you…”

A small smirk tugged at her lips, and she tamped it down as best she could. “Try all you like. I always win, and you know it.”

She really did. She’d won everything we’d ever done since the moment I first saw her and knew I was done for, two years and one hundred ten days ago.

We fell into an easy rhythm, working together off our computers, side by side, and the exhaustion of the past few days slipped out of me as if it had never been there. Guess it had just been the lack of Anna Preston that was taking it out of me. Snow piled up outside the windowsill, and we shot designs and concepts back and forth, worked through correspondence together, got the lists put together for the different departments for their parts in the event, and scheduled some relevant communications blasts to important partners, and when Anna stifled a yawn, sinking against my side, I shut my laptop, setting it aside.

“I’m all right,” she protested weakly. “Just need another cup of coffee…”

“Darling, it’s ten o’clock. And you’ve been running around with your hair on fire all day. You can take a break.”

She shot me a look. “Like you’re one to talk?”

I beamed. “Do as I say, not as I do, sweetheart.”

“Ugh, you’re just like your grandmother.”

I slipped my phone out, navigating to my audiobooks app and passing it to her. “So, pick what we’re listening to.”

“Oh, god,” she laughed awkwardly, putting a hand over her face, as she shut the laptop and took the phone. “Pratchett and everything? Veronica really gave you the whole dossier…”

“She did, but still I could mostly just focus on how she tried to share erotic fanfiction with you. Dealer’s choice, Preston. If you might be able to forgive me, I’ll admit I haven’t read any Pratchett before.”

“ Guards! Guards! It’s the eighth, technically, but it’s the place to start. It’s a standalone, you don’t need to know anything from the others to understand, and it’s… well, it’s the City Watch.” She laughed, covering her face, a little flush at the corners of her cheeks. “Oh, god, this is embarrassing. I can’t believe you’ve gotten this out of me.”

“Haven’t read for pleasure a lot lately?”

“Not a ton, yeah, no. It’s been a minute. But I guess we can go ahead and introduce you to Discworld. We can’t listen to too much, though, you know. We’ve got a lot on our plates.”

I nudged her shoulder, and somehow, incredulously, against all odds, I’d slipped and fallen through the timestream and into a world where I got to rest my head against Anna Preston’s. So, well, I did. “A little break will make us more productive in the long run, darling. Or maybe it’s just me being from the Hallmark Channel, trying to remind you of the importance of letting go of all that work for a minute…”

“Uh-huh,” she said drily, rolling her eyes, smiling as she started the book. “Our very own Hallmark Christmas romance.”

Romance? She’d said romance. Had she said literally anything else and some trickster god had interfered to make it sound like she’d said romance?

No, I think she’d said romance.

“We’d make a poor one,” I said, pulling the blankets tighter around us. “Terrible work-life balance between the both of us. I think one of us is supposed to be an artist or something in a small town, teach the other the true meaning of Christmas…”

“We’ve always followed our own rules,” she said with a small smile, turning off the phone screen and resting it across where our legs were pressed together under the blankets as it started playing.

“Touché, darling.”

I was hallucinating, because her hand found mine under the blanket, and she slipped two fingers around my index finger, intertwining lightly with mine and holding me softly. “You know it’d be an issue if I were your darling,” she said lightly, softly, dreamily. “One of us is going to get promoted over the other… and when I say one of us, I mean me.”

My stomach tightened for a million reasons. “I guess that’s frowned upon,” I said airily. “They’d have to send you to a different department once I took over the office, and we’d never get anything done without you in the department…”

“They’re already sampling me out for the office,” she murmured. “Dobbs said you backed out. That was when I stormed off to shake some sense back into you.”

“I know,” I said. “He told me they’d probably try you out for it in the meantime. I figured I’d let you get a little advantage. Figured you’d need it.”

“You’re so annoying,” she laughed, and my heart exploded, because she turned, and, as easily as anything, she kissed me—pressed her lips against the corner of mine, squeezing my hand under the blankets, and then she just went back to resting her head against mine, as if she hadn’t just shaken my entire world like a snowglobe thrown at a brick wall. Went back to listening to the book. I wasn’t hearing a word from the book. Shame—I’d heard the books were good.

“Only just now figuring that out?” I said, finally, a hundred years later after I’d pulled myself together.

“I… shouldn’t have done that,” she said, her voice soft. “Please pretend that didn’t happen.”

I swallowed, my heart pounding, just listening to the book with her, trying to make out one word from the next. It was an eternity before I said, “It’s okay. You can call me annoying. I kind of am.”

“Hm.” She nestled closer to me, impossibly closer, and I just—I didn’t know what to—how to live, how to breathe, how to think. I loved her so much I could die. I’d have been transferred to another department, another company, another country, another planet if it meant I got a chance with her. I’d swim the ocean for her, count every star in the night sky to find one that glistened a thousandth as much as she did, learn every word in every language to try in vain to find one combination that could express how beautiful she was and how my heart ached for her.

For right now, though, I’d just listen to her nerdy old books with her and eat cookies. That would have to do.