A Merry Little Christmas

Chapter 18

Nell

A blast of wintry air hit Nell as she stumbled outside. But she was impervious to the cold. She walked a few paces into the marketplace and over to the far side of the Christmas tree, away from the glare of the Merry and Bright windows.

Olek had had mumps. Mumps could cause infertility. And Olek was infertile. The worry in the back of Nell’s brain that had been circling ever since that distressing day at the clinic was now front and centre. It could not be a coincidence, it simply couldn’t. An image of Dr Bajek questioning Olek about past trauma flashed into her mind. The doctor had obviously been trying to establish the cause of his infertility. Now a chance conversation in the shop had revealed the answer.

Orchitis. That was what that woman had called it. Nell googled it on her phone and winced at a picture of severely swollen testicles. Poor Olek having to deal with that as a teenager. She scanned the text until her eyes rested on the words, ‘male infertility’. A rare complication, apparently, but not unheard of. If Olek had suffered as badly as Irena suggested, this could well be the cause of his problem.

Nell pressed the phone to her chest and squeezed her eyes tightly shut. Her darling man. He was the absolute best father a man could be to a child and yet, if this was true, the chances of him having fathered Max really were very slim. She recalled the things he’d said outside his parents’ house the other night, about being prouder of your children’s accomplishments than your own. She couldn’t take that away from him by telling him her fears. She wouldn’t.

For the first time since she’d misled Olek about the results, she felt grateful for her decision. He must never find out. He must never even have an inkling that Max might not be his. He and Max shared the same colouring, even if build-wise they were chalk and cheese. But unless you were looking for differences, you’d never suspect a thing. More importantly, neither would Olek.

She blotted the tears which had gathered in her eyes and blew out a breath. She could do this. She could be strong for Olek and make sure he never, ever found out. She and he might never have biological children of their own, but at least Olek would always have Max. Yes, she was being dishonest by not passing on her theory, but faced with the knowledge that if she did she’d damage their relationship permanently, she’d live with that dishonesty.

‘Nell?’ she heard Max call. ‘Nell, are you out here?’

‘Yes! Coming!’ She injected a positive tone to her voice, sniffed back any remaining tears and hurried back towards the shop. Max was standing in the doorway directly underneath the bunch of mistletoe which Merry hung up every year. Nell resisted an impulse to gather him to her and give him a big hug. Thank goodness he was oblivious to everything that was going on in her head. ‘What’s up?’

Her stepson frowned. ‘Mum can’t come and fetch me. She’s already drunk a bottle of wine with Viktor.’

‘No problem.’ Nell opened the door and gestured for him to go in ahead of her. ‘I can take you home.’

Now, ideally , she thought. She was emotionally exhausted. But she’d stay until the end; she wouldn’t desert Merry, no matter how much her friend’s music was annoying her.

‘Cool.’ Max gave her a bashful smile. ‘Thanks, Nell. You’re the best. You and Dad.’

Her stomach plummeted towards the floor; she was so lucky to have this wonderful, trusting young man in her life. Even if he wasn’t Olek’s son, as far as she was concerned it didn’t change how she felt about him. ‘Max?’

He turned towards her, and she gave him a tight hug.

‘You’re the best too.’

‘Weirdo,’ he said with a grin.

She followed him back inside. The shop was even busier than before. Harley had a queue of customers at the till, Woody was gift-wrapping as fast as he could, and Fred had come through from the studio to chat to Astrid. For the next ten minutes, Nell threw herself into sales mode, talking to customers and advising shoppers on which aroma would suit whom on their Christmas gift list.

‘Oh God,’ Woody muttered, pressing a hand to his chest. ‘You are kidding me. Who brings a pet shopping with them?’

Two girls had come into the shop, one of whom had a pet carrier which she wore as a backpack. There were mesh panels on all sides and the beak of a bright yellow budgie was poking through a tiny gap in the back panel.

‘You big wuss,’ Nell snorted. ‘It’s not going to get you.’

Woody shuddered. ‘I hate birds. Like real full-on phobia. It’s the wings and the way they flap at you. I’m staying in the studio until the coast’s clear.’

‘The rest of the choir has arrived,’ said Harley, brightening as the door opened and a group of excited kids piled in. ‘We’ll sing for thirty minutes and then I’m going to leave too. Granddad, are you still OK to give us a lift?’

Fred clapped a hand over his mouth. ‘I forgot all about it. And I’ve drunk too much mulled wine now. I’m sorry, lad.’

Harley groaned. ‘You’re supposed to be dropping me and my mates off at Nando’s. That was partly how I got them to agree to sing tonight.’

Fred put a hand on his shoulder. ‘Book a taxi for you and your friends, I’ll pay for it.’

‘Or I can take you?’ Nell offered. ‘I’m giving Max a lift, so it’s no bother.’

‘Thanks, Nell. But a taxi would be cool, please Granddad,’ he mumbled and sloped off to join his friends.

‘Pastry-enclosed Christmas nibbles!’ Woody announced, returning with two trays of food.

‘That’s a lot of pastry,’ Merry frowned, appearing from the studio with some Winter Wonderland candles to replenish the shelves. ‘What about people who don’t like it or who are gluten-free?’

On any other night, Nell would have laughed it off, but tonight, she was feeling too sensitive. ‘I’ve catered for all dietary needs,’ she said, bristling. ‘I’ve got vegan and gluten-free mince pies. I just haven’t put them out.’

Astrid and Irena bit into sausage rolls and a shower of pastry crumbs fluttered to the ground.

‘ Ojej !’ said Irena.

‘ Entschuldigung !’ said Astrid at the same time. ‘ Aber also lecker !’

‘I rest my case,’ said Merry through gritted teeth. ‘Now I’ll have to vacuum the floor before I leave.’

‘Or,’ said Nell, crossly, ‘as I am also a partner in this business, maybe I’ll do it.’

‘You’ve literally just said you’ll take Max home,’ said Merry, a little smugly for Nell’s liking. ‘So you won’t be able to.’

‘I’m amazed you heard that over the volume of this music,’ Nell retorted.

‘Oh, Nell, please!’ She rolled her eyes. ‘Change the record. The music is fine, it’s Christmas music.’

‘Mince pies and sausage rolls are fine, it’s Christmas food,’ she shot back, folding her arms.

She glared at Merry and Merry glared back. It was so childish that Nell almost cracked up with laughter, but the thought hit her suddenly that her best friend would be holding her own baby in her arms in a matter of weeks but that she herself, unless she did something extremely drastic, never would. So, instead of laughing, she tensed her jaw and tried not to notice the look of hurt in Merry’s eye.

The awkward moment was broken by a scream and someone shouting, ‘Oh no!’

The budgie had set itself free from its pet carrier and was flying around the store was darting from display to display.

Nell ran to the door to make sure that the bird couldn’t escape if someone opened it. ‘Harley, please can you turn the music off so we can hear ourselves think.’

‘Like that makes any sense,’ Harley grinned, clearly enjoying the drama. ‘But OK.’

‘I’m so sorry!’ cried the girl who owned the bird. She took a handful of bird seed out of her pocket and threw it onto the floor.

‘Marvellous,’ muttered Merry. ‘And no doubt it’ll poo everywhere as well.’

‘Birds like me,’ Astrid boasted. ‘I think I can get it to land on me, get ready to catch it.’ She held out her arm and began whistling. The budgie landed momentarily on Astrid’s head. She yelped and batted at her hair. ‘Get off me.’

The kids from the choir joined in, leaping into the air, climbing on the shelf units and grasping at thin air as the bird evaded them.

‘Here, birdy birdy,’ cooed Irena, holding out the last of her sausage roll.

Merry sighed. ‘I don’t believe this. Will someone please catch it.’

‘Yes!’ Woody shrieked from his crouched position behind the counter. ‘Seriously, guys, I’m freaking out here. If that bird touches me, I won’t be responsible for my actions.’

The music went off and Harley returned with a broom.

The owner started to cry. ‘Please don’t hurt it, it was my granny’s and she’s just died.’

She had big green eyes peeping out from under her woolly hat and deep dimples in her cheeks.

Max puffed his chest out. ‘Don’t worry, we’ll catch the damn thing. What’s it called?’

‘Chump,’ sniffed the girl.

Everyone started calling to it. ‘Chump? Chump? Come down, Chump! Here, Chump!’

‘This is turning into a farce,’ Nell muttered. ‘Please tell me I’m dreaming.’

‘Can anyone see it?’ Max asked, searching the room.

‘There!’ Merry pointed up to a display by the window. ‘I think it disappeared behind a candle on the top shelf.’ Before anyone could stop her, she’d grabbed the stepladder and had climbed up to the top step. ‘I can see it. Come here, Chump!’

‘Hells bells, Merry Robinson,’ Nell gasped. What was she thinking? ‘Get down immediately.’

‘I will,’ Merry panted. ‘Just as soon as Chump is safely in the palm of my hand.’

‘I don’t think a pregnant woman should be the one coming to the rescue of your budgie,’ Irena wagged a finger at the bird owner.

‘Quite,’ said Fred, positioning himself at the base of the stepladder. ‘Merry, come down immediately. That’s a direct order.’

‘For the millionth time,’ said Merry through gritted teeth, straining to push candles on the top shelf to one side, ‘I’m a fit, active woman, not a bloody invalid.’

‘Your phone is ringing inside your bag, Merry!’ Woody shouted. He was still behind the counter.

‘Answer it please,’ she said breathlessly. ‘I’m nearly there … Come on, bird.’

The top of Woody’s head popped over the counter. ‘It’s Cole.’

Nell marched over to the stepladder and tapped Merry’s leg. She was furious with her friend. To take a risk like this over a budgie. ‘No, get down now!’ she yelled at her. ‘There’s a shop full of people here, all of whom are more suitable candidates than you to be catching a wayward budgie.’

‘Bear with, Cole,’ said Woody cheerily. ‘Merry’s just up a ladder at the moment, trying to catch a bird.’

‘Nooo!’ Merry yelled. ‘Don’t tell him that!’

Nell couldn’t hear Cole’s words, but she did hear the explosion of sound.

‘Oh dear.’ Woody thrust the phone away from his ear to avoid being deafened. ‘He doesn’t sound happy.’

Merry’s foot slipped on the step, and she yelped as she clung on to regain her balance. There was a collective gasp among the crowd.

‘ Vorsicht !’ Astrid clasped a hand to her chest.

‘For heaven’s sake. Look at you,’ Nell hissed, hoping the rest of the shop wouldn’t hear.

‘It is a bit foolish,’ Astrid agreed, joining Fred at the bottom of the stepladder.

‘You are the most selfish person I’ve ever met,’ Nell continued. ‘I’d give anything to be in your position, and I don’t mean up a ladder behaving like an absolute idiot, but a mother-to-be, literally days away from having your own baby. One you’ve created with your husband. You have no idea how lucky you are and how hurtful it is for me to see you being so careless. And I can’t stand by and watch you risk the baby’s life like this, so get down now or, I swear I will never, ever speak to you again.’

‘The baby, the baby, the BLOODY baby!’ Merry cried. ‘I’m sick of hearing about the baby. What about me? Where am I in all of this? Nobody ever worries about me and what I’m feeling.’

‘What? That’s not fair and it’s not true either.’ Nell’s lip trembled; how could she say that? Nell had done nothing but love and care for Merry for almost twenty years. She felt a tight band around her chest. Merry had crossed a line and Nell had had enough. She drew herself up tall. ‘You know what? That’s me done. You think you can do everything by yourself, so on you go, prove it. I quit. I am resigning immediately.’

As the shop fell totally silent, the budgie swooped down to its owner, who tucked it securely back into its carrier.

Merry’s head whipped around, and she stared at Nell open-mouthed. ‘Seriously?’

Before Nell had a chance to reply, Woody cleared his throat. ‘Sorry to interrupt, Merry, but Cole says your dad’s care home has tried calling you. You need to get over there immediately. Apparently, it’s urgent. Very urgent.’

‘Oh my God, Dad!’ Merry’s feet stumbled down the steps in her haste to get off the ladder.

‘ Mein Gott !, Astrid yelped. ‘Be careful, Liebling !’

Nell put a hand out to steady her. ‘I’m so sorry.’

But Merry didn’t even acknowledge her. Instead, she grabbed the phone from Woody, scooped up her handbag and fetched her coat from the studio.

‘Merry, ‘she called after her,’ let me drive you.’

Merry shook her head without even looking in Nell’s direction. ‘Leave me alone.’

Poor Merry. What had she done? How could she have turned on her best friend like that at a time like this? Nell just hoped she’d find a way to make it up to her before it was too late.