Aching for His Discretion (The Discretion Dynasty #1)

48. Teegan

Chapter forty-eight

Teegan

S itting in front of my mirror, I finished straightening my hair as my kitty curled up by my feet. Putting it in a half-up, half-down style with two long bangs, I thought about the night I was about to have.

I had my date with Levi this evening, and I was feeling… a bit overwhelmed, to say the least. I was genuinely trying to believe he had changed and that he was making an effort to be a better person, but even after two years, it felt sudden .

I had almost gotten over him. I had thought about dating other people. Jacob crossed my mind a few times, but I turned him down because I felt as if I was still attached. Now that Levi’s back in my life, I find myself trying not to admit how much power he truly had over me and my heart.

As if Grayson read my thoughts, he meowed softly, looking up at me. I picked him up and sighed.

“Don’t tell me you missed him?” I asked, and he simply purred as he cuddled into my shoulder. “I hope you know he isn’t your real daddy… I don’t want you to keep thinking he is just because he gives you treats,” I muttered, and flinched as I heard a voice from the door.

“ Daddy , huh?” Levi laughed, and I blushed as Grayson jumped out of my arms and ran over to him.

Traitor.

He picked up my little kitty and gazed at my outfit. I wore a cream bodycon dress with puffy long sleeves and open-toe white heels. My dress stopped mid-thigh and definitely accentuated my curves. As much as I didn’t want to admit it, I wanted to be pretty for him. I wanted him to compliment me as he did when we were together a few years ago.

He placed my kitty on the edge of my bed as I stood up and faced him. He came over to me and I could see the restraint in him as he didn’t want to push the boundaries I set when he came. His eyes gazed down to my neck, and his Adam’s apple bobbed slightly as he rested his eyes on my necklace... his necklace that I’d initially taken off.

It was probably too sudden for me to put it back on, but just for the night, I thought it would make him happy.

“You look… absolutely beautiful, Tesoro,” he whispered, and I slowly brought my arms around his neck as I pulled him into a hug. Although this technically was crossing the line I put up, I thought to make an exception, given that I hadn’t seen him all day. He wrapped his arms around my waist, and I felt content as he pulled me in closer, letting out a deep sigh as if he was finally able to breathe.

“Fuck... My pretty girl,” he whispered, and I breathed him in, too, as I felt my knees almost go weak.

His pretty girl. I didn’t want to believe that he could win me back in a heartbeat, and I had to remain strong… set up some limitations so I wouldn’t be under any manipulative tactics again. So reluctantly, I pulled away. His jaw clenched for a moment, but he simply held his hand out for me to take.

“Ready?” he asked, and I nodded as I grabbed his hand, allowing him to escort me out of my apartment.

We went over to his car, and I unintentionally swung our hands as we walked. I caught a glimpse of him looking over at them swinging, but he didn’t say anything. He simply tightened his grip slightly, almost as if he was afraid I’d run away.

Like a gentleman, he opened the car door for me, and I took a seat as I thanked him. As we drove to the restaurant, he kept his hands to himself as we made small talk. It felt nostalgic, reminding me of a few years ago when we would normally ride together and talk.

When we arrived, we were seated in the middle of the restaurant. After Levi pulled my chair out for me, he took a seat across from me, and our waiter walked over and poured two glasses of water.

“Good evening. Can I get you both started with something to drink?” he asked.

Levi spoke before taking a sip of his water. “A glass of 1975 Sherry Cask whiskey, neat. And a bottle of your finest Bolgheri Superiore wine.”

The waiter nodded, then looked over to me.

“I’ll just have the water for now,” I said as I tried to avoid his rather intense and attentive gaze on me.

He nodded his head. “I’ll be right back with that for you.”

As he walked away, I noticed Levi looking a bit… agitated. He cracked his neck to the side and unclenched his fist on the table as he looked over to me.

“Levi...” I whispered, knowing full well he was a bit angry because of the waiter’s gaze.

He shook his head. “It’s fine, Tesoro… I’m with you, and he’s not. I can’t control what he does, and I will not attempt to,” he remarked, and I fell silent.

His response felt like an automated one, one he probably learned in therapy to help control his anger and outbursts. It didn’t exactly feel like the Levi I knew, and although it was refreshing to hear that he was actually working on himself, it just felt… different .

Nonetheless, I nodded.

The waiter returned with the bottle of wine, two glasses, my water, and Levi’s whiskey. Levi ordered for the both of us, and I took a sip of my water as I still felt the waiter’s gaze on me a couple of times.

Miraculously, Levi remained… eerily calm. He definitely noticed the waiter’s insistent stares, but he ignored them as he finished placing the order.

After the man left, Levi spoke.

“I know it’s selfish of me to think this,” he began, and I tilted my head. “But I want you to come back to New York,” he said, practically spitting out the words.

I felt taken aback. I felt almost speechless, to say the least.

“Levi... I’m in residency. I can’t exactly up and leave the hospital,” I whispered.

He nodded. “I know. So I’ll wait for you. If you’ll allow me to.”

I bit my lip nervously. “Levi... we’re supposed to be starting slow.”

“I know that too, Tesoro… but I won’t hide how much I love you. I want you to move back to New York and I want a family with you. I want our two children, Silas and Eden, to be waiting with me for Mommy to come home from her long shift in the hospital. I want to be with them, surprising you at work when you go to lunch or have a break. I want a diamond ring on your finger, reminding you and everyone else that you are mine. I want to spoil you. Put you in the ranch home you’ve dreamed of and allow you to work in your own private practice. I want to see you smile, laugh, blush… for the rest of my life. And if you need time right now, that’s fine, but know that I will wait for you whether you want me to or not.”

My heart clenched as he looked at me with much sincerity.

Silas and Eden . He remembered the names I’d picked out years ago… He laid his heart out for me while I felt at a loss. He’d changed for me. He was willing to keep changing who he was for me. He was willing to wait. He was willing to do anything to have me in his future.

“Levi, I—” I began, but I couldn’t find the words to speak.

“You can take the time you need, Tesoro. You already know I won’t be going anywhere, not when you have my heart.”

Feeling my heart beat faster as he waited patiently, I shook my head.

“I... I’ll be right back,” I said, immediately regretting it as I stood and walked to the bathroom. I toyed with my necklace on the way and felt his eyes on me as I walked.

Stepping into the bathroom, I let out a breath. My plan was failing . My solid plan of taking things slow was starting to fail. I couldn’t keep up.

I wanted to give myself to him. I felt myself aching to do so, but I felt torn for what he’d put me through, the mental trauma and manipulation. But it was almost as if my brain wanted to throw it away and submit to him, give everything to him for the future we could possibly have, move back to New York, get married, have his kids… God, I felt so overwhelmed.

I had no clue what I was supposed to say in response. Not when one part of me wanted to run for the hills, and the other wanted to bend over the table for him after thinking about his truthful and almost sexy redemption speech.

Where are your morals, Teegan? What happened to your self-control?

Deciding not to dwell much and leave him outside pondering, I left the bathroom only to be face to face with our waiter. I smiled as politely as I could as I tried to step aside.

“Excuse me,” I said, not even questioning why he was outside of the women’s bathroom.

As I walked, I felt him grab my hand, and I looked over at him cautiously.

“Doesn’t look like your boyfriend seems very interested in you tonight.”

My eyes went wide as he ran his eyes over my figure. I immediately felt disgusted as I pulled away, and he let out a low laugh as he followed me closely.

“He saw the way I was looking at you…And he said absolutely nothing. If you were mine, I wouldn’t let that slide . You’re so fucking beautiful ,” he muttered.

I did my best to ignore him as we entered the dining hall.

Memories of Alec and his advances in the past began to surface, but I did my best to push them away before the inevitable tears surfaced.

As I approached our table, I stopped in my tracks as Levi was no longer sitting there. Where did he go?

My heart raced as the waiter shamelessly ran his hand over my shoulder in the middle of the restaurant. However, no one’s eyes were on us.

“See, he’s not even here anymore. Any guy would be fucking lucky to have you.”

“Get your hands off of me,” I said angrily as tears wanted to escape my eyes. I didn’t want to panic as we were in public, and he wouldn’t be able to do much, but he felt like a threat nonetheless.

He scoffed cockily, his hand lightly grazing my lower back. “Or what? Your little boyfriend surely isn’t going to save you—” he began, and I jumped as my hands flew to cover my mouth as he was ripped away from me.

Turning around, I watched Levi grab the waiter, slamming him onto an empty table behind us. From sheer force, the table broke, and the man let out a cry as he lay over the broken pieces of wood and glass.

The entire restaurant went silent, and all that you could hear was the sound of the waiter groaning in pain and Levi’s heavy breaths.

All of a sudden, Levi lowered himself to the ground and punched him several times in the face and on the chest.

I couldn’t move. The entire restaurant erupted into a panic, but no one stopped him. He was enraged and had a murderous aura that made me feel fearful.

As he punched the man, his veins began to show, and his hair became disheveled. Sweat beads formed on his head, and his knuckles began to redden, the skin threatening to tear.

Once the waiter became practically unrecognizable, Levi sat back on his knees and rested his hands on his thighs as he continued to breathe deeply.

After a moment, he stood up and leaned his head back, as if relief had washed over him—almost as if this was therapeutic for him.

My heart raced as I was petrified… for two reasons.

Reason number 1: Levi just practically murdered a man in front of me and about seventy-five other people...

He looked over at me slowly, his murderous eyes still present as they held a possessive gaze over me. I felt frozen in place. I felt as though I couldn’t move even if I wanted to. He began approaching me, and I gulped softly as I looked up at him in complete shock.

And reason number 2: My panties… were basically soaked as I watched him.