All My Broken Pieces (FindingLight #2)

Chapter 50

Fallon

Happily ever after.

The hero and the heroine ride off into the sunset, staring lovingly into each other’s eyes.

No more heartache, no more strife, only basking in the love they hold for the rest of time.

What a load of shit .

I knock back another shot of tequila. It’s never been my drink of choice, but it’s dirt cheap here, and the cheaper the better for the purpose it’s serving me right now.

And that service is to make me forget, or at the very least, not care anymore.

“I think you’ve had enough.”

I hold up my hand in Arriana’s direction. I’ll say when I’ve had enough, and it’s not yet.

“Fallon.” She sighs, sinking into the seat beside me. “We need to talk about this, baby.”

I shake my head vigorously, pouring another shot from the bottle into my shot glass. “Nope, not gonna happen.” I mutter, tossing the liquor down my throat. The warmth that follows the burn a welcome contrast to the icy chill of my soul. I reach for the bottle once more only to have it snatched out of my reach. “Hey!” I shout, whirling in my seat to glare at Arriana.

She levels me with one of her own, not backing down. “No, you’re done.”

“ Fuck you .” I growl, reaching forward to snatch the tequila back.

Arriana’s jaw clenches, her eyes alight with something that should probably scare me, but I’m too far gone to care. Without a word, she turns and chucks the bottle against a nearby wall, watching as the broken shards of glass rain down with the wasted liquid.

I shriek, turning toward her and lashing out. “What is wrong with you?” I cry, trying to claw at her face. She traps my wrists in her hands, stopping the attack. I struggle against her, jerking wildly at her hold, my mind flashing back to the feeling of their hands on me. On my body. Inside of me.

I collapse in a heap, sobs breaking from my chest. Arriana loosens her grip, helping me down so I don’t hurt myself. Not that I’d care right now. Maybe the pain would help take some of this internal agony away.

“Talk to me, baby. Please.” She begs, releasing her hold and moving to kneel beside me.

I blink at her, my mind a confusing blend of the sweet, loving partner I’ve known for years and the cold-blooded, psychopath murderer I witnessed less than twenty-four hours ago. “I can still feel them.” I mumble, pulling my knees up against my chest.

I can vaguely hear the sounds of other patrons around us, probably wondering what’s the matter with the poor American girl. But I don’t know what they’re saying, so maybe it has nothing to do with me. Maybe they could care less about my mental break.

They’re probably used to tourists getting sloshed and losing their shit. Not like we have a great reputation of being a level-headed group of people.

I giggle at the thought, drawing more unwanted attention.

Arriana watches me quietly as I flow through the gambit of emotions. Once my fit of inappropriate laughter subsides, she reaches out, hesitating before touching me. I stare at her hand, wanting to feel the comfort I once felt at her touch.

Can I ever feel that again?

A wave of nausea rolls through me at the memory of her hands covered in the blood of my assailants. But with the liquor surging through my system, I find that the nausea isn’t from the blood, it’s from who the blood belonged to.

I blink, surprised at the realization. Shifting my gaze toward Arriana, I study her closely, looking for any hint she’s different for having murdered two people. But, as I study her, I realize that she had to have done this before. “You’re a murderer.” I breathe.

Arriana’s eyes dart around us, before she presses her finger to her lips. “Not here.” She whispers, reaching a hand out to help me up.

I stare at her hand before slipping mine into hers, allowing her to pull me to my feet. We stumble back to our car. I’m grateful for her help as I try to walk on wobbly legs, finding the task nearly impossible.

Arriana helps me round the vehicle, opening the door and lifting me into my seat. My mind wars against itself once more, trying to marry the gentle touch with the murderous violence I witnessed.

She closes the door and quickly crosses the SUV before climbing into her seat and turning to face me. Before I can say anything, she releases a heavy breath and blurts out, “Yes, I’m a murderer. The two men you saw me kill last night were not my first. Far from it.” She lets out a small chuckle, quickly schooling her features at the look on my face. “I know it’s a lot to take in, baby. But I’ve been doing this a long time. Long before we met.”

Before we met?

I can’t voice the question out loud, but she can read it on my face. “Yeah, before we met. The first man I killed was in a situation similar to what happened last night. Only Andrew was the one who came to my rescue, and he let me take my own revenge on the man.” My eyes widen at Andrew’s name.

Wait, if they’re both killers…

“From there, he introduced me to Charles .” I flinch at his name, remembering all I endured thanks to that man. My sluggish brain works to piece together the connections, to catch up to the story she is painting. “He brought me in on his business. Hitman. Or, I guess in my case, hitwoman.” She waits for me to process what she’s said before continuing. Taking another deep breath, she says, “That’s where I met Killian.”

“Wait.” I snap, shooting upright. “Killian? Like Ava’s Killian?” My heart thunders in my chest and I think I’m going to be sick. Arriana inclines her head and the bile threatening to escape makes its way up my throat. I barely get the door open in time before chunks spew from my mouth, my body shaking violently.

I need to warn Ava. I need to get her away. I need…

My mind replays the joy on her face when she walked down the aisle. The gentle care he’s shown her the entire time I’ve known them with the exception of that one night. The growth and healing she’s had since meeting him.

I can’t ruin that for her.

Sitting upright, I wipe my mouth with the back of my hand, leaning back in my seat and breathing heavily.

“Are you okay?” Arriana asks, her tone full of worry.

I bark a laugh, rolling my head in her direction. “Am I alright?” I echo, snorting at the ridiculous concept. “Well, let’s see. My girlfriend killed two men in front of me. Then, come to find out, she’s always been this murderous psycho,” Arriana flinches at the term and my heart aches, but I can’t stop the word vomit anymore than I could stop the physical vomit moments ago.

“And not only is she a murderer, apparently all of her friends, or sorry, business partners are also killers. And what’s worse? My best friend is married to one. With no clue. And she’s a whole fucking country away from me. So, what am I going to do if her husband goes all ballistic one day and decides to off her? Nothing. I can’t fucking do anything .” My chest heaves as I finish, my fingers clenched in tight fists.

Arriana studies me for a moment before asking, “Is that all?”

I roll my head toward her. “ Is that all ?” I repeat, certain I must have heard her wrong. When she doesn’t correct me, I laugh again, giggles bubbling up and uncontrollably breaking free. “Why? Is there something I’m missing?”

“You were assaulted, baby.” Her words are a slap in the face. I immediately sober up, sitting up straighter. “All the other stuff, I understand and I can do my best to explain, if you’ll let me. But, I need to know you’re alright.”

I gulp, wrapping my arms around my chest. “I’m fine.” I mumble, but even I can hear the lie.

“It’s okay to not be okay. But you can’t keep it bottled up. Talk to me. Let me take some of the pain for you.” Arriana’s pleading voice pulls at me, breaking down the flimsy walls I’ve built up between us.

“It…it wasn’t the first time.” I admit, shame filling me at the memories. “I should have known better, shouldn’t have been stupid enough to have this happen to me again . I knew what could happen if I went out alone in the dark, and I did it anyway. I-I shouldn’t—” My voice cracks, body shaking violently as my mind replays the assaults, all of them blending in a disturbing replay of my stupidity.

I jerk as a small hand rests on my arm. Blinking at the hand, I follow it up to the person beside me and find I can breathe a little easier when I see Arriana staring back at me. The haunting memories fading away as I get lost in her dark eyes.

“It wasn’t your fault. None of it was your fault.” I’m already shaking my head before she finishes. Her hand suddenly grips my chin, forcing my eyes on hers again. “ Listen to me. ” She snaps, searching my gaze desperately. “You did nothing to deserve what those men did to you. I’m sorry I couldn’t protect you. I’m so sorry.” Her own broken tone has me reaching out.

“Hey.” I murmur, brushing my fingers down her neck, feeling her gulp against my fingertips. “It wasn’t your fault either.” Something clicks in me at the reassurance I offer her.

None of this was on us. It’s those men who cause so much pain. Those men who should pay.

My eyes search hers, and I find I understand why she did what she did.

She made them pay.

And, while I don’t understand how anyone could be capable of something like that, I know she did it because she loves me. To protect me.

And somehow, I love her even more for it.

The hangover following my brief stint with tequila has me swearing off of it for good.

“Too loud.” I grumble, blindly swatting around to turn down the radio.

Arriana chuckles beside me, twisting the knob on the radio to shut off the music. The car fills with a blessed silence. I release a thankful sigh, leaning back against the passenger seat.

“We’re almost there, just a few more hours.” Arriana says, keeping her voice soft so as not to exacerbate my pounding head.

I groan, wishing we were out of this damn car already. “Okay.” I mumble, allowing myself to drift off to sleep once more.

My dreams are full of nightmarish men preying on myself and other innocent women before a ghost of the night swoops in to save us, to save me .

I reach out toward the masked hero, my fingers shaking as I grip the mask. “Can I?” I whisper. The hero nods their head, allowing me to remove the mask concealing their identity.

My hand covers my mouth as I find Arriana hidden beneath. “Are you really surprised, baby?” She strokes my face softly. “I’ll always protect you. No matter the cost.”

I jerk awake, looking around the dark. “Arriana?” I whisper, my heart thundering in my chest when I get no answer. I strain my eyes to look out the windshield at the dark expanse before me, but can’t make anything out.

The door opens and I scream, moving away as far as I can in the seat. “Shhh. It’s just me.” Arriana soothes. “We’re here.”

I suck in a breath, hold it for four, then slowly release it. Repeating the process until my heart doesn’t feel like it’s about to burst from my chest. “We’re here?” I repeat when I’m able to form the question.

Arriana smiles at me, nodding her head and holding out her hand. “Come on, let me show you our new home, mi vida .” I stare at her outstretched hand, debating if I trust her enough to go with her.

Unbuckling the seatbelt, I gingerly place my hand in hers and allow her to help me out of the car. She guides me toward the back of a beautiful small building. It’s hard to make out in the dark, but I can see molded ridges lining the rooftop. The closer we get, the more details appear as my eyes adjust to the darkness.

The home itself is different shades of the same sandy color, pops of reddish brown accentuating the design. There are several windows along the walls and off to the side of the front door, a small pathway leads to an open courtyard.

“Arriana,” I breathe. “It’s beautiful.”

She beams at me, bending to scoop my body in her arms. I squeal despite myself, clinging to her neck. “Home sweet home, baby.” Crossing the threshold, she presses a kiss to my forehead. She moves to pull away but I stretch my neck out, capturing her lips with mine. Arriana lets out a surprised gasp before sinking deeper into the kiss.

I don’t know what the future holds. I don’t know how we’ll get past what happened. But there’s one thing I do know, that I’m going to try.

I love this woman more than logical reason. We’ve fought through the pain, through all the forces trying to keep us apart, and this is no different.

My life didn’t turn out how I always imagined. But, if I’m honest with myself, I never wanted that life anyway.

I was always destined for a story meant for a book, one that would feel so incredible it could only be fictitious.

Smiling up at the woman who I never expected, I press my lips to hers once more.

My psycho lover.