An Alien for Her Heart (A New Home #2)

19. Varek

19

VAREK

T his isn’t nearly the situation in which I wanted to discuss this with her. But Catherine is looking up at me with eyes that are finally showing me her soul. She wants me. She’s willing to give me a chance. I have her attention now and despite that I wish I could hide every damning thing about my species away, I owe her this.

In my broken state, she has every right to decide if she wants a male who is silent inside. And one who could potentially harm her if his core-rhythm actually awakened.

I take a deep breath, trying to steady my nerves.

“Here.” I take one of her hands and press it to the center of my chest. “Here is where my song should sing.”

“Your song?”

“A vibration that awakens when we, Kari, find our true mate.”

A flicker of apprehension crosses her face. I hate that I’m the cause of it, but I force myself to continue.

“It is so rare that we believed ourselves the lost ones.”

“We?”

“Every displaced Kari.”

A shudder goes through her and I’m aware I need to find a way out of this water hole before her health deteriorates more.

“But…Zynar and Eleanor…” Her body shakes slightly and her arms tighten around me.

“His core-rhythm sang.”

There’s a moment of silence where I can almost see her mind sorting through the information.

“And that was why you had to be there? When it happened?”

I nod slightly. This is the part I didn’t want her to hear about. Not like this. She’s only just let me in. What I’m about to tell her might just push her away again. And yet, there’s an underlying urge to lay everything bare. That if she rejects me now, it will hurt less than if she did it later.

I take another deep breath before continuing. “I had to be there when my brother’s core-rhythm awakened, because it put his kahl in danger.” I pause, my gaze boring into hers. Maybe I want to see the moment she rejects me. Maybe I want to have the image burned into my brain. “The same way I will have to protect you from me.”

Catherine’s beautiful eyes are like little gems in the dark. Her brows furrow slightly, but she doesn’t say anything. I’m forced to continue.

“When our core-rhythms awaken, it heralds the start of the rut,” I begin, my voice low and strained. “It’s a primal drive, an ancient instinct that compels us Kari to claim our mates. When it takes hold, it’s all-consuming. We lose ourselves to the need to possess, to mark, to ensure that our bond is unbreakable.”

Her brow rises this time. “You have the urge to take your partner to bed?”

A strange laugh escapes my throat. “No, sura. It is much worse than that.”

“Tell me.” Her voice falls so low it whispers across the water’s surface.

“When it happens, I will mate with you repeatedly, each time more fiercely than the last. I’ll be relentless, almost feral. I won’t stop until your scent is intertwined with mine, until there’s no doubt that you belong to me and I to you completely.”

This time, she’s the one that does a strange laugh. “You say that as if you think I’m this person for you. How can I be when…when I’ve already lived a life and—”

I shudder at the vulnerability in her voice, at the pain that laces through her words. Gently, I cradle her face in my claws, tilting her chin up until our gazes meet.

“Catherine,” I breathe, pouring every ounce of my conviction into her name. “I’ve told you. I don’t care about your past, about the life you’ve lived before. All I care about is the future we can build together.”

Her eyes shimmer with unshed tears, and it takes everything in me not to press my lips to hers and take them all away. “How can you know that I’m meant for you, when we’re so…different?”

When my core-rhythm hasn’t sun g…

Her unsaid words send a lance through me.

“I feel it,” I tell her, my thumbs brushing over the delicate skin of her cheeks. It’s the only thing I can say. The only thing I’m going on. “In my core-beat, you are there. In my soul, in every fiber of my being. You’re a part of me, Catherine. You always have been, and you always will be.”

Her throat moves and a shudder goes through her frame, her body stealing some of my heat, but not fast enough. “What about the fact that I was married before? Had children? A life.”

“I’m not here to replace them.” I study her beautiful face. “You don’t have to let go to move on, Catherine.”

She blinks and a single tear escapes, tracing a silvery path down her face. I catch it with my claw, marveling at the precious drop.

“My heart…” she whispers, hand shifting over her chest and I know she must be referring to her core-organ.

“Let me heal your heart.”

More water escapes her eyes and I’m not sure that is a good sign. But she grips me tighter. She leans into me as her shoulders rise and fall with heavy sobs.

“I’m sorry, my sura,” I murmur, my chest aching with the weight of her pain. “I’m sorry you had to go through so much to find your way to me. But I believe it was all for a reason. Every hardship, every heartbreak…it led you here, to this moment. To us.”

Catherine’s breath hitches, her hands coming up to cover mine where they cradle her face. “You really believe that?” she asks, hope warring with disbelief in her eyes.

“With each core-beat that calls your name,” I vow. “This is fate, Catherine. You and me, here and now…it’s what was always meant to be.”

A shaky laugh bubbles up from her throat, half-sob and half-joy. “I never thought I’d have this again,” she confesses. “Love, a future, a…a mate.”

The word sends a thrill down my spine, a primal satisfaction that settles deep in my bones. “Say it again,” I rumble, my cock rising in my trouse despite the cold water around us.

Her eyes sparkle up at me, a slow smile curving her lips. “Mate,” she repeats, stronger this time. “My mate.”

A growl rumbles up from my chest, and I crush her to me, sealing my mouth over hers. Catherine responds with equal fervor, her digits tangling in my mane as she arches into me.

“When it happens, it’s not gentle, sura,” I warn, my voice dropping to a near whisper when we take a moment to breathe. “There will be biting, scratching, a level of force you’ve never experienced. When I take you, truly take you, the rut strips away all civility, leaving only the basest of instincts. It’s about domination, my sura, about leaving a mark that can never be erased.”

I can hear Catherine’s heart pounding, can smell the mix of fear and…excitement rolling off her skin. She moans into my mouth as I take her lips again, the sound sending all my lifeblood rushing to a singular place. It takes every ounce of my control not to pull her against me, to claim her right here and now.

“I want to have every ounce of you, Catherine. I will.”

I’ve said a lot. Enough to scare my little human away certainly now. To my surprise, she breaks the seal of our lips, deep breaths wracking her frame as she pierces me with those gemstone eyes.

“Varek.” The way she says my name, full of tenderness and understanding, nearly undoes me. “I’m not afraid. Not of the rut, not of any part of you.”

I search her gaze, hardly daring to believe what I’m hearing. “You must understand. Once the rut takes hold, I won’t be able to control myself. I could hurt you, I—”

She silences me with a digit pressed to my lips. “You could never hurt me,” she says with a conviction that rocks me to my core. “I trust you, Varek. With my body, with my heart…with everything I am.”

Emotion clogs my throat, rendering me speechless. I pull her close, burying my face in her damp mane as I try to compose myself.

“I don’t deserve you,” I manage after a moment. “But gods help me, I want you. I need you, Catherine. More than I’ve ever needed anything in my life.”

“Then I’m yours,” she whispers, her breath warm against my throat.

Joy, pure and incandescent, explodes in my chest.

I have to get her out of here. Have to get her to safety.

“Catherine.” I push away from her so she can look at me. “I know a way out of this. At least, to get you out of the cold water. But…”

“But what?” Her body shivers again and I know it’s the only option.

“But it will mean getting rid of all the water stored in this well. I can direct it to your field, but with no crops there, it will simply be wasted to the earth. And you…you will be without water for several sols.”

Her body shivers again. “I can do without water, Varek. Do it.”

I study her. She won’t be without water. I could never allow that. I will personally use my truck to bring her enough, so she has water to drink and wash herself. But the animals and the rest of the farm will suffer. Not to mention, the protective algae in the water hole will all die. Getting them regrown will take several moons. Her farm, this farm she’s been working so hard on, will be useless for some time.

“There is more. Your farm…this water hole is important. Your farm will be crippled without it.”

Catherine shakes her head. “It doesn’t matter, Varek. We’ll deal with it when the time comes. Just as we will with everything else.” The double meaning in her words makes something warm swell inside of me. “If you can save us, do it.”

It pains me to put her at such a disadvantage, but there is no other choice. I hold her for a few more moments before slowly releasing her. She treads the water as I take a deep breath.

“I must go to the bottom. I won’t be long.”

She nods, her throat moving as I dip beneath the surface.

There, I turn to look up at her.

The shimmering moonlight filters through the water, casting an ethereal glow on Catherine’s face. Even from this depth, I can see the trust in her eyes, the unwavering faith she has in me. It steels my resolve, driving me to do whatever it takes to get her out of here safely.

I dive to the bottom of the well, navigating the murky depths with ease. It doesn’t take long to find what I’m looking for—a small, circular grate set into the floor. This is the water hole’s drainage system, designed to prevent overflow during heavy rains.

With a twist, I wrench the grate free, sending a cloud of sediment billowing up around me. Immediately, I feel the water begin to rush out, the current tugging at my limbs as it’s sucked down into the underground channels.

I kick back up to the surface, bursting through with a gasp. Catherine is already swimming towards me, her face etched with concern.

“Are you alright?” she asks, running her hands over my shoulders as if checking for injury.

I nod, pulling her close. “I’m fine. The water is draining out now. We just need to hold on until the level drops enough for us to stand.”

She shivers in my arms, her teeth beginning to chatter again. The cold is getting to her, seeping into her bones. I curse myself for not being able to get us out of this sooner.

“Here.” I guide her arms around my neck, letting her cling to me. “I’ll keep you warm.”

Catherine presses her face into my shoulder, her breath hot against my skin. “Thank you,” she murmurs, her words slightly slurred. “For everything.”

I tighten my grip on her, silently vowing to never let her go. “Anything for you, my sura. Anything at all.”

As the water drains, soon my feet hit the ground, the surface of the water hole now far above us.

“What now?” Catherine whispers. Her concern echoes my own.

“We wait.” I stare at the stars above, knowing that I won’t leave this place without the female in my arms. I will stay here until someone finds us.

“Do you think someone will come by?” Catherine settles against me as the last of the water drains and I slide to the floor with her in my arms.

“Zynar. If he pings me and I don’t respond, he might come looking for me.”

Catherine nods, her damp mane brushing against my jaw. “And if he doesn’t?”

I release a slow breath. “Then I only have one other option. But that will mean destroying your water hole completely.”

“If that’s the only choice…”

“No.” I ease away somewhat, brushing damp tendrils from her face as I force her to look at me. “You need it and this farm…it’s important to you.”

Catherine studies my eyes, her focus strong and sure.

“Wait with me here. When dawn lights, if no one comes, I will do what I must.”

She studies me for a moment before giving me a soft nod. I pull her into me again, reveling in the feel of her against me and the fact that despite the circumstances, this is our first time together as mates.

Catherine has accepted me. And I will turn the world over to ensure her faith in me is not misplaced.