Axes & O’s

19. Fox

Chapter 19

Fox

I try to keep my face clear of emotion as I sit down on the chair next to the couch so I’m closer to Nathan than my wife. I only heard the tail end of their conversation, not wanting to spy on them. But I understood Morgan’s desire to ask Nathan to start again with a clean slate.

While I stand by what I told her in the sauna, that I didn’t go too far with Nathan by giving him instruction, I know we broke a lot of the rules we normally have in place when we bring a third person in. Nathan is, for lack of a better word, vanilla. Even though he has shown his desire to be otherwise, Morgan and I know what it’s like to question those desires, to be unsure of what you like and feeling as if it’s not okay to like it.

Morgan and I have had many years to explore our boundaries and figure out likes and dislikes. Nathan is much like a freshman in college when it comes to this, and he’s also in a situation with strangers, so his emotions are heightened. I’ll admit, I’ve probably made this harder than it had to be, and if Nathan wants to talk to me about it, I’ll use my words and do just that.

“So,” Nathan says shyly after a few beats of silence.

My cheek twitches at his awkwardness. I know I make him uneasy, and while it tickles my sadistic side, I want him to feel comfortable with me, a realization I had while I cooled off in the office.

It’s easy for me to see things others don’t and to use that information to my advantage. But as Morgan’s been helping me see, I can’t always use that information to get what I want, which is what I was doing with Nathan. Again, I stand by what I did because I did it. But I’m going to try to be less of a dick from now on.

Key word: try.

“I’d like to start over,” I say.

My eyes leave Nathan’s for a moment to catch Morgan’s. She’s smiling warmly at me, and my frozen heart thaws.

“And if I don’t want to start over?” Nathan asks.

Morgan and I both turn to him. I can see the shock on her face out of the corner of my eye, but I’m not surprised by his statement. Like I said, I see things other people don’t.

“What is it you want, Nathan?” I ask, enjoying the way his name feels on my tongue. The tongue that still has a lingering taste of him I gleaned from my wife’s mouth.

“I…” He looks down at his hand, the one that’s joined with Morgan’s. His still-damp hair from his shower flops over onto his forehead, and I stop myself from reaching out to tuck it away.

I may be a big man who demands what he wants and doesn’t take shit, but that doesn’t mean I can’t be soft, that I don’t enjoy the small things or taking care of people. I live to take care of people—and not just my wife but our employees and our land. And I always take care of our partners, even if it doesn’t feel that way sometimes to them.

“Nathan.” My tone is laced with an edge of dominance. When he looks back up at me, I soften my eyes to reassure him, as if I’m reaching out my hand. “Say what you want.”

“There’s no judgment,” Morgan adds.

Nathan inhales. “I want to explore more, but I don’t know what that looks like. I don’t understand how this all works. I don’t know what to say or do. It feels overwhelming.”

Morgan uses her hand in his to scoot closer to him, giving him the comfort he needs. I feel my hand itch to do the same, to reach out and touch him. But while I’m confident that Nathan is attracted to me, he made it clear he’s not ready for me to do anything, so I’m keeping my hands to myself. Even if, deep down, it feels like a rejection—an emotion I haven’t had to feel since I was much younger and na?ve about love and feelings.

“We’ll set clear boundaries so you feel good about everything. We should’ve done it before, but we jumped into things too quickly,” Morgan says.

She’s right. Not being responsible right off the bat is so unlike us. It’s also why we’re having this conversation right now and I’m not balls deep in my wife while she sucks Nathan off or some variation of that image. And it’s my fault, because I came to realize that there’s a reason I’ve been acting like this, and it has nothing to do with Gabe or my past and everything to do with the man we saved.

The man now sitting across from me with color in his cheeks and determination in his eyes. Even if I didn’t admit it right away, I knew the moment I laid eyes on him that he was different. I let my gut feeling and that sappy kismet moment cloud my ability to keep order. And now I have to be responsible and set things right so we don’t lose Nathan before we even have him.

“Boundaries?” he asks.

“We go over what you’re okay with exploring and your limits—and it doesn’t have to be complicated,” Morgan says. “Then once that’s settled, we let things happen naturally. We’re stuck here for a while; we don’t need to rush things. You can set the pace, Nathan.”

I glance at Morgan, the words she echoed earlier cycling in my brain. The cheeky grin on her lips tells me everything I needed to know. She’s baiting me, but she’s right. I’ve let her take the lead to keep Nathan from spiraling, and now we need to let him set the pace.

“And if I like the pace you set?” Nathan asks, his voice tentative .

Now it’s my turn to gloat. The very immature response would be to yell “I told you so!” at my wife and stick out my tongue, but I won’t do that. Also, I’m positive she knows I’m thinking it because her jaw is hardened, and I’m betting she’s biting her tongue.

I clear my throat and steady my features. “Then we can lead. But we need boundaries.”

Nathan rubs the stubble on his jaw, looking timid. “I don’t know where to start. I’m…well, I’m—”

“You’re a missionary man?”

“Fox!” Morgan scolds.

I hold up my hands. “Nothing wrong with that.”

My gaze turns to Nathan’s, and instead of finding him embarrassed, I see that he’s trying not to smile. “He’s not wrong.”

Two points for “I told you so.”

I lean back in my chair, satisfied with his answer, and cross my arms over my chest. Nathan watches the movement, eyes tracking the muscles and veins bulging in my arms beneath my sleeves of black and gray ink. The attention only makes me preen, and I create more tension in my muscles so that he knows I’ve got his number.

When his eyes meet mine again, I smirk at him, almost in challenge. One that begs him to deny he wasn’t paying attention and liking what he saw but not enough to put him on the spot. Thankfully, he still doesn’t turn away or become embarrassed like he did earlier. It makes me think the sauna helped erase a little bit of his hesitation.

Morgan sighs, the kind of sigh she uses when she’s around men being idiots. My head turns to her, and while she’s exasperated, she’s also smiling. My chest tightens when I see it. It’s been a hard year for her, for us, and I’m happy to see her smile. Not that she doesn’t smile with me, but this one is softer. It’s a smile I missed, one that says she’s at ease and hopeful about where this may lead .

“First, I think it’s important we let you know that Fox and I have been tested recently.”

Nathan blinks. “I didn’t even think of that.”

“Good thing you have us, then,” Morgan assures him.

Nathan’s body softens, and he smiles at her. “I, um, I had a physical and got tested last month. Nothing to report.”

An emotion I can only describe as giddy kicks up in my stomach. I was fully prepared to use condoms, but my ideas about what we can expose Nathan to have shifted if he’s open to it. I know Morgan’s thinking it, too, because I see her wiggle on the couch. The image of Nathan’s cum leaking from her tight asshole while mine pushes free from her cunt is a pretty one that I plan to make come true for her—for us.

“Do you have any hard limits?” I ask next.

Nathan eyes me. “Meaning?”

“Things you don’t like.”

He shrugs. “I honestly don’t know.”

“What porn do you watch?”

Nathan flushes, but he wants us to set the pace. And with him, I think it’s better to get to the point instead of beating around the bush.

“I, um…”

“No judgment,” Morgan coos.

Nathan settles back on the couch before his gaze finally returns to mine. “I don’t watch porn that often, but when I do, it’s either amateur videos or a bit like what we did in the sauna.” He adds the last part quickly, like he’s embarrassed to admit he’s been curious about domination.

I nod. “Do you like pain?”

“Meaning?” he responds, a lilt of curiosity in his tone.

I lean forward in my seat. “Meaning, if Morgan or I put you over our knees, would you like a good spanking, or would that be too much?”

The air sucks out of the room, and the popping of a log in the fireplace makes Nathan flinch. Morgan is watching him closely, and I know she thinks I’ve asked too much. But I saw the way he responded to the idea of her riding his face, suffocating him with her pussy, and now I see the way he’s responding to my question.

Nathan’s chest is rising and falling rapidly, and his skin has more color. I also don’t miss the outline of his impressive cock in his gray sweatpants. If I was nicer, I’d take that as my answer. But I want to hear him say it. It’s important that he learns to use his words before we truly begin playing.

“I think I would be interested, but I’m not sure.”

Satisfaction wells inside me. He didn’t balk at that or the fact I included myself in that scenario. It’s not something I’d do yet, or ever. But it’s good information to have.

“Nathan.” Morgan draws his attention to her. “Remember what I told you about me being a switch?” He nods. “I got a taste of your dominant side, but given what Fox just asked you, would you be interested in the reverse, then?”

His skin turns redder. “I think so. I mean, I think that’s how I’ve tended to be with my partners in the past.”

“You experimented as a submissive?” I ask.

He shakes his head. “No, not that, just—I like to take direction. I like to make my partners feel good.”

I absorb the information that’s not new to me but good confirmation, nonetheless. Nathan followed my direction in the sauna perfectly, and despite his reaction to using Morgan in a way he wasn’t used to, he was checking in with her, making sure she was okay. Had he not left, I’m positive he would’ve insisted on reciprocating, letting her use his face for her pleasure.

“I’m going to give you a couple of options, Nathan.”

His and Morgan’s eyes both snap to mine. My tone is stronger now, commanding. I’m done with talking, and I have enough information and experience as a Dom to know how to make this comfortable for everyone. Morgan does, too .

Nathan’s gaze flicks to Morgan’s then back to mine. Morgan doesn’t know what I have planned or what I’m going to say. But I think she gets why I’m moving this along.

“What if I don’t like the options?” he asks, a snarky tone coloring his question.

Morgan smirks, and I cock my head at his smart mouth. Once again, he’s showing me what I already know—he’s very much like my wife. He doesn’t know how to own the dominant side of him, but he also hasn’t really explored his submissive side. He just existed in this space between, floundering and looking for a lifeline—or two.

“I think you’ll like them if you can keep your mouth from opening again so I can speak.”

I don’t know if he means to, but Nathan’s body responds to me, his lips pressing shut like a good boy. Fuck if that doesn’t make me hard. I refrain from saying the praise out loud and sit straighter in my chair. “Your first option is we keep talking. We can do that all night if you want—”

“And the second?” he asks, interrupting me with his impatience. I guess his ability to stop himself from speaking only lasts so long.

I smirk sadistically, keeping score of how many punishments I want to give him for his insolence. “The second is you get on your knees and lick my greedy little lamb’s cunt clean.”