Beautiful Storm (San Francisco End Game #1)

CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

Amelia

What the hell am I doing?

I subtly rub my belly as I wait for the light to turn green. I should have been at Luke’s by now, but instead of taking the direct route, I took the scenic drive, delaying the inevitable. Trying hard to focus on the city lights and my relaxing playlist so I don’t spend the time talking myself out of it.

Tomorrow I’m supposed to be getting married… and today was a mess of all messes to say the least. I narrowly avoided being outed on TV. Thank God, the live broadcasts were at the other side of the field. Not that anyone really knows who I am, but if one person did, the media would be all over it.

For some reason, Preston hasn’t bothered to make our breakup public knowledge among his fans, so it would result in people either assuming he’s the father, or dragging my name through the mud for cheating on him. Both shitty options.

God, for someone who prefers to live behind the scenes, I attract the wrong people into my life. First, Preston and now, Luke. What am I doing? Why couldn’t I have accidentally gotten pregnant by a small-town accountant or mechanic? At least then I would have someone to do my taxes or fix my car rather than someone with the potential to propel my life into the spotlight. Although I suppose Luke got my car fixed, so maybe an accountant would be best.

My phone buzzes as I drive, and I don’t need to see the screen to know it’s Hayley checking in on me. I texted her after my chat with Tom and I wasn’t in a great place. Sure, he was pleasant enough, just like Jim had been when I’d first told him about my pregnancy, but he wasn’t subtle in alluding to this being my last big project for a while. With a baby in my world, it would be impossible to work the long hours needed in this job—not that I want to work that much when the baby comes along, or at all—but after a while, when I’m not breastfeeding and can look into daycare options…maybe, I’ll go back. God, I haven’t thought about what that would look like, but it’s not going to be easy. It’s hard enough finding work in this industry, let alone finding work that would allow me to have any kind of relationship with my child.

Maybe I should have been thinking about this before now.

When I finally arrive at Luke’s, he’s waiting out front, most likely convinced I wasn’t going to show up, and he wouldn’t be completely off base. We may not be making it official until tomorrow, but the fact that he wants to talk now suggests that our time is up and there’s no going back. Unless that's what this is? Is it him, taking it all back?

And if it is…I’m not sure I’d be sad about it. I’m not sure about any of it.

All I know is that it’s hard to remain the independent woman I promised myself I’d be after leaving Preston, when I’m about to marry a man for his money. It’s been a month and I’ve yet to come to terms with it. Because do I really need it?

I’ve been to the emergency room once in my thirty-two years and that was after the fire incident with Luke. I mostly eat healthy. Mostly. At least I do now. And I keep fit when I have the time and the headspace. Have I let myself get run-down during times of stress? Yes. But would I ever do anything to jeopardize the health of my unborn baby? Hell no . Since finding out I was pregnant, my every decision has been about my baby. About Jelly Bean. Wow. Luke was right, it is better using that name. Because of Bean, I’m no longer the first in the office, letting myself sleep in when I need it. I eat when I’m supposed to, drink plenty of water, and take my prenatal vitamins. I’m listening to my body. If something ever felt off, I’d be the first to ask for help. But does that mean I need the best insurance? Plenty of women have babies without it. Daily . Just because I have a high-profile baby daddy doesn’t mean I’m going to need it.

But what if I do?

How can I take that risk?

I put on a smile as I get out of my car and wave as Luke stands. “Are you okay?” he asks, his scrutinizing gaze locked on my face, pulling me out of my crazy thoughts.

“Of course.” I laugh nervously. “Why wouldn’t I be?” I wait until I reach him before adding, “I’m soon to marry San Francisco’s most sought after bachelor and I’m pregnant with his baby.”

Luke’s face drops as he releases a breath. “Thanks for the sarcasm, Joy , but I was being serious. What happened after you left today? Why were you there so late? They didn’t fire you, did they?”

His obvious concern gently tugs at my heart, but I try hard to ignore it. “I’m sorry,” I say honestly, my shoulders relaxing as I glance up at the sky and blow out a breath of my own. “They didn’t fire me. They were great about it, but things will be different after this project. And while I never expected otherwise and I wouldn’t want them to be the same, I hadn’t really thought it through.”

“I understand that but it must still be upsetting.”

“Honestly, I’ve been focusing my thoughts on life during pregnancy, and about marrying you, I haven’t really thought much past Jelly Bean’s birth, apart from writing a list of items I might need.” Luke smiles at my use of his nickname and I huff out a laugh. “Sorry again. You don’t need to worry about what happened today. I’m fine. And we have other things to discuss. Tomorrow’s our wedding day. Right? So yay.” I smile wide while Luke stares at me with a pissed-off expression.

“Okay.” I laugh. “I’ll drop the sarcasm. Thank you,” I say seriously and I mean it. “I appreciate you stepping in when Jake turned up. And I appreciate your concern, and your text.”

“Yeah, well, it seems I care. A little.”

“Thanks.” Unfortunately, so do I.

When I saw Jake storming toward me, I panicked. Without him saying a word, I knew that he’d somehow found out about my pregnancy and that meant my time was up. He was about to win. Yes, I’d already told Jim, but it would be harder for him to fight for me if I caused a scene on live TV. And make no mistake, I would have caused a scene.

But I didn’t have to.

And I’m still a little shocked about that.

Reed coming to my rescue was confusing at first. Until I remembered he’s a protective guy. He told me that himself.

But Luke.

Luke coming to my rescue had my heart racing for all the wrong reasons, and now I can’t stop picturing him as a doting father to our child. A protector. And I hate how much more attractive that makes him.

I mentally shake off my thoughts as he laughs to himself before heading toward his front door. “Come in. It’s getting cold out here.”

“Thanks.” I move to follow him inside but pause at the threshold. “Though I have to ask…why am I here?”

“Well, Amelia, it all comes back to me caring. I don’t want you to be put in a situation like that again. It shouldn’t have happened and because of that, we need some kind of plan.”

Dammit, Luke . “Thank you.” A plan is a good idea. But why am I so nervous?

I tuck my knees up to my chest as Luke passes me a glass of water before sitting on the couch opposite me. “So where do we begin?” he says with an awkward laugh, making me smile. It’s good to know I’m not the only one feeling uncomfortable about everything between us.

“Since we’re getting married tomorrow, maybe we should start there. Talk about how that’s going to look, who we’re going to tell.”

“Sounds good and as I mentioned, Lainey knows and Thomas now too. Oh and Reed.”

Reed ? “Guess that explains why he came to my rescue.”

“Actually, it doesn’t. Believe it or not, like me, the guys care about you. Reed wasn’t kidding. We would all walk away if they fired you. I mean we wouldn’t walk away from football because that’s insane. But I doubt any of the guys would continue with Project Storm .”

“And here I was thinking it was your dream to be an actor.”

“Maybe it is. I’m about to play the part of a doting husband after all.”

I try to laugh, but his words don’t sit well with me and my face scrunches on its own. I wait for his laugh, but when I look his way, he’s frowning. Whatever that means.

“Anyway, they’re the people I’ve shared the news with, but I need to tell Coach.”

My chest tightens despite knowing this was coming. “Okay, yes. That makes sense. Will you tell him the truth, or pretend we’re really together?”

“The truth. It will be easier in the long run. What about you?”

I don’t have to think about it before I answer, “Yes, you’re right. I agree.”

“No.” Luke chuckles. “I mean, who else knows on your end? I remember you saying you wanted to tell your friend, Hayley.”

“Oh, yes.” My cheeks heat but I smile through it. “Hayley knows. But that’s it.”

“You’re not going to tell your mom or Tom and Jim?”

“Nope. Tom and Jim know enough. They don’t need to know about the marriage. And as for my mom, the less she knows the better.”

Luke frowns. When we were kids, I had a good relationship with my mom, but a lot has changed since then. “Trust me,” I add, hoping he’ll move on. But he doesn’t.

“Who does she think the father is?” he asks after a beat.

“She doesn’t know.”

“Obviously. But I’ll bet she’s asked.”

“I’m sure she would if I answered her calls.”

“What?” Luke’s eyes widen before he schools his features. “But—”

“Do your parents know?”

“Not yet, but they will. Soon. I haven’t spoken to them, but it’s better to ask for forgiveness after I’m married than explain why they're not invited.”

I nod as guilt threatens to darken my mind, but I refuse to let it. I know what will happen if I tell my mom. She was shocked about my pregnancy, and not happy that it wasn’t Preston’s. But discovering I’m also getting married, when she’s still hoping I’ll fix things with him…that’s another story. True, she’ll find out eventually, but as with Luke’s family, it’s better for that to happen after-the-fact. She’ll just stress me out, and I don’t need that while I’m pregnant. She already tried when I mentioned the baby.

“Next topic,” I say with a grimace and pray that he lets me off the hook.

Luke shakes his head with a laugh but thankfully moves on, and I’m once again grateful for his kindness. “Let’s talk about the actual ceremony. We have to make it real for the officiant.”

“Of course. I don’t have any plans to give the game away.”

“I know, but what about vows, etc.?”

Vows? Jesus. Why does that make me squirm? “The standard ones are fine. I’m sure we can find something online.” Luke’s lips lift into a cocky smile and I cringe. “Don’t tell me you wrote something?”

“I haven’t.” He shakes his head before looking away in thought. “But I bet I could think of something. What about—I promise to be open and honest. To never keep secrets. To protect you and any future children we might have. I promise to…” He continues on but I zone out. He’s trying to be funny but his words bring up memories from the past, and I’m struggling to separate the man he is now from the boy he was then.

He promises to be honest . No secrets . To protect me . But it’s all fake.

What am I doing? This is a mistake. God, what happens when I’m ready to find true love? I’m going to be doing it as a twice-divorced woman. Twice. In my thirties. Marriage is supposed to be about love, but instead I marry the guy who pretends to care. My body numbs as all the emotions from the past come rushing back.

“Amelia, what’s going on?”

I curl my hands around my knees as Luke stands in my peripheral vision. I try to suck a deep breath to calm myself but struggle to take in air as the reality of it all sets in. I know it’s fake. That’s what it’s supposed to be, but it’s not that easy. Luke’s not just some guy I’m having a baby with. We share a history. And the baggage between us is weighing me down.

“Amelia.” Luke rushes to my side and drops to his knees in front of me before grabbing my legs, the warmth of his hands pulling me back to the present. “What happened?”

I suck in another deep breath before pinning him with my gaze, shaking my head. “It’s not right.”

“What’s not right? The baby?” I shake my head again at the sheer panic in his eyes and he calms a little. “The wedding then? We’re doing it for Jelly Bean. Think about—”

“Marriage means something to me, Luke. I know it means nothing to you, but it means…well, it used to mean everything to me.”

Luke’s gaze softens as though he gets it, but he doesn’t. “Don’t think of it as a marriage. I promise, you can still have the perfect marriage one day. This is just for now. Until the baby is born and—”

“Did you ever care about me?” I blurt out and instantly regret it. Talking about our past and our feelings makes it harder to pretend it’s all meaningless between us.

Luke rears back as though I slapped him, his eyes wide as he responds, “What?”

“Sorry, don’t worry. Forget—”

“No, I’m not going to forget it, but that’s a complicated question.”

“And it has no place in this discussion. We are talking about our present situation. Not the past.”

“But you brought it up, so we need to talk about it.”

“Nope.” Now is not the time for us to be arguing, and I know how this ends.

“Amelia.”

“Luke.”

He shakes his head and stands before pacing in front of me. “What are we talking about here? Because you know I fucking cared. I—”

“You promised to be my hero , Luke. You said you’d always be there for me and you lied.”

“Are you talking about the fire?”

“No. Yes. I’m talking about all of it.”

“All of it? What else?” He stares at me with wide eyes, confusion marring his features. And I don’t blame him. I’m still harping on about something that happened when we were kids. I should have moved on by now. I thought I had, but I guess I never expected to be so close to Luke again. It’s bringing up bad memories.

“It doesn’t matter. I shouldn’t have mentioned it. It was so long ago and—”

“It does matter if you’re still thinking about it. So let’s get it all out in the open. Starting with the fire. It’s about time we said our piece."