Chapter 51
Hunter
When I got home from picking up Carina, Jennifer was waiting at my door. I don’t know why it irritated me, but it did. I should have been in the best mood after moving back into my old office, even if it overlooked the dumpsters. It felt like a piece of my life had dropped back into its proper place.
Jennifer waved at me. “You’re home late. I knocked, but Charli didn’t answer. I’ve been out here waiting for like an hour.”
“Charli’s not home today.” I left it vague. She didn’t need to know that Charli moved out.
“Again? She wasn’t here yesterday either. Sounds like you might need a new nanny.”
I opened the door and sighed. I was going to need a new nanny. That was a fact I didn’t want to think about. Some part of me was still hoping Charli would come back. “We’re doing fine right now. ”
Jennifer walked in and dropped her large purse on the kitchen island. “I can help more if you need me to. All you have to do is ask,” she singsonged.
“Did you get your rent paid?” Charli’s words stuck in my head. She’s lying to you! I didn’t want to think it was true, but it was possible.
“Huh?”
“Your rent. Did you get it paid?”
“Oh yeah. My landlord was so happy. Thanks again for the help.” Jennifer threw her arms over my shoulders, practically smothering my daughter, and kissed my cheek. “You’re a lifesaver.”
I gently untangled myself and handed her Carina. “I think she’s wet. Can you change her for me?”
“Uh, yeah. Sure.” She looked around for the diapers, like they would appear out of thin air.
“Diaper bag is on the chair.”
Jennifer grabbed it and laid Carina on the rug, who rolled over and crawled toward the couch. Jennifer caught Carina and tried again. As she reached into the bag, Carina flipped over and snuck away on her hands and knees.
I watched this play out three times before I intervened. “Let me help you.” I got all the supplies out and caught my daughter. “You’re such a little speed demon now, aren’t you?” I kissed her head and laid her down, then gave her a rattle to shake. Carina was so busy with her toy that she barely moved while I did the quick change.
“How did you do that?” Jennifer asked.
“I’ve watched Charli dozens of times. She’s a real pro.”
“Of course she is. When is she getting home? I was thinking she could make that chicken casserole she made last week. It was so good.”
Jesus Christ! I was already mentally exhausted, and she’d only been here ten minutes. “Charli won’t be home to make dinner and, really, it isn’t part of her job, but the fridge is stocked; you’re welcome to cook something.”
She laughed. “I’m not much of a cook. I usually go for whatever is quick.” Carina crawled over and sat at her feet and played with the straps of her sandals. Jennifer pushed Carina’s hand away, picking her up and placing her on her lap.
“Me neither.” I went to the freezer and peered inside. “I have a frozen pizza.”
“Hmm. Mario’s down the street is better. Maybe we could order out.”
I gritted my teeth and pulled the box from the freezer. “This is already paid for. It’s frozen pizza or nothing.”
“It’s not like money is an issue for you.” She laughed. “But if you want to go cheap on me, that’s fine.”
Calling me cheap after I gave her five grand for rent was insulting, but I held my tongue for the sake of my daughter. It was in Carina’s best interest for her mother and me to get along. I preheated the oven and put the pizza on a tray, then leaned against the counter, watching her interact with my princess.
Jennifer held her up and spoke to her in a syrupy voice. “Did you miss your mama today? Can you say Mama?”
Carina kicked her legs. “No.”
Jennifer frowned. “Say Mama.”
“No!”
“I’m your mama!”
“No, no, no!”
I understood Jennifer’s frustration, but I was oddly proud of my daughter for setting her boundaries. I stomped over and took Carina from her. “Hey, don’t get upset with her; she’s a baby. It’s understandable that she’d be confused since you haven’t been around.”
“I’ve been around,” she huffed. “I guess I’ll have to spend more time with her. I can come over in the mornings and stay with her while you’re at work. I mean, it would be better than having a stranger like Charli watch her. It doesn’t seem like she’s very dependable anyway.”
Like hell I would let this woman stay in my apartment unsupervised. She could rob me blind or worse, take off with Carina, never to be seen again. “Charli has been dependable since day one. We won’t need you to be here during the day. ”
“You can’t keep me away from my child, Hunter. Kids need their moms.”
I didn’t disagree, but she should have thought about that when she dropped Carina at my front door. “No one is trying to keep you from her. I’ve been more than accommodating. You’ve gotten more visitation time than if you went through the court.”
Her eyebrows raised. “Are you threatening to take me to court? Because we can go that route if you want to. You know, judges almost always rule in favor of the mother. I can take Carina away as fast as I gave her to you,” she said with a snap of her fingers.
She poked at my one insecurity. The thought of not seeing my daughter every day had me backtracking. “I’m not threatening you; I’m only stating facts. I don’t want to go through the court any more than you do. As long as we can keep it civil, I’m sure we can come to an agreement that works for both of us.”
“Well, we already know we can be civil. We made Carina, didn’t we? We were very civil that night.” Her words were filled with innuendo. Yes, she had a pretty face and a banging body. Yes, we had sex. Yes, we were forever tied together by our daughter, but there was no spark, no chemistry. I felt nothing when I looked at her.
The only woman I wanted had walked out my door. She’d taken care of Carina, taken care of me and I took her for granted. She’d put up with my shit day after day without ever asking for a thing for herself. I would have given her everything, but I didn’t give her the one thing she wanted most.
Me.
I should have asked her to stay.
I should have told her not to go.
I should have told her I loved her.
Now that she was gone, I realized what a fool I was for letting her leave.