Bitter Brambles (The Ivy Institute #2)

Chapter 16

brIAR

I drop the heavy wood slat into place behind the door after closing myself in. Sunny bent the metal that holds the bar in place right after this became our room. Prior to that, there wasn’t a lock at all.

I’m still shaking with adrenaline when I let myself fall on the bed. My mind forces me to replay the events of the past hour in my head in a bid to make sense of what just happened. I remember the jolt of jealousy when I saw a female way too close to Sunny for my liking. Something about the way she looked at him told me everything I needed to know, which only validated my feelings of possessiveness.

Instead of talking to him and demanding to know what the hell was going on, I left the arena like a coward at the first chance. I thought hearing Jeh verify my suspicions about the female and Sunny having a history was the worst thing to happen, until I saw Moros’s roommate unconscious at his feet, prompting me to wonder what else the shifter would have said if he wasn’t silenced by my mate.

The arrival of the other elites and Mick further complicated matters, bringing me to now, where I’m alone in the room with no answers about the female or what is going to happen to Sunny for injuring Jeh.

If I would have just stayed and talked to him, this wouldn’t have happened. My gut twists into a knot, and I bend over, fighting the urge to puke. I don’t know what I’m going to do if I lose him too.

In the hours that pass while I’m alone in the room, I practically wear a path in the stone floor with my pacing. When I finally hear a soft knock an eternity later, I throw myself at the wood and take hold of the bar barricading the entrance. It takes a moment for my mouth to work, but eventually, I’m able to ask, “Who’s there?” I don’t even hear his response, just his voice, before I lift the bar and drop it carelessly on the floor behind me.

Before he can even make it into the room, I slam against his chest and curl my fists into the fabric of his shirt around his back. He lets out a surprised, “Oomph,” before he returns my embrace, nuzzling his chin against the top of my head.

I’m barely aware of him walking us into the room and closing the door. I just know he’s here and I’m so fucking grateful. “What happened? What did they do?” I ask.

He removes his arms from my back and makes an effort to lean away so he can cradle my face while looking down at me.

“Are they going to punish you?” I blurt out while searching his face.

“No, Briar. I’m sorry I scared you.” His citrine eyes roam over my face.

“You didn’t scare me. What they would do to you did,” I confess.

He pulls me in again, holding me against his chest. When he speaks, his words are soft. “Foley isn’t happy with me. He said if I want to lighten the roster, then I need to start in the dregs.” He tries to make light of the situation, but the effort is wasted on me.

“Are you sure he isn’t going to send you away?”

“I’m his only hope of winning the Undertaking, princess. He isn’t going to get rid of me.” I wish I had the same level of confidence he does. “I’m sorry I made you worry.” Now that I know he’s safe, at least for now, I can’t help but think about what started this whole mess.

He must sense the change in me, or maybe he’s just thinking about the same thing I am, because he says, “There’s something I need to tell you.” His words trigger another reaction from me, and it isn’t one I anticipated, though I probably should have since my first instinct is always to hide when something’s happening I don’t want to deal with. I want to tell him not to bother, and that whatever it is doesn’t matter, but that isn’t true for either of us.

Reluctantly, I release the grip I have on his shirt and take a single step backward. The cool air of the room instantly makes me regret the decision for more than one reason. “I heard what Jeh said. I know about you and the female.” Maybe it’s that simple, and he just wants to admit they have a past.

“This isn’t about her, not really.”

“What do you mean?” My apprehension has me taking yet another step away from him. He grabs my hand, probably to keep me from getting farther away.

“She had a message for us.”

“A message for us?” None of this is putting me at ease.

“From Ziv.” His brows lift high on his forehead as if to warn me there’s more to come. I wasn’t prepared to hear his name, and even after coming to terms with the fact that some part of him will always be with me, it doesn’t make accepting his loss any easier.

“Ziv,” I whisper. I can’t remember the last time I said it out loud, even though it’s always running through my mind.

“He wants to open up a line of communication. He used my brother to pass the information to Starla, who told me she needed to talk to me today on the field.”

“That’s why she was talking to you?”

“Yes, and that’s why I met up with her before coming back here tonight, but not because I knew she had a message from him. I just knew whatever she wanted to tell me was important.”

“You met up with her already?” I try to pull my hand from his. I need to walk, to move so I can process my thoughts and stop this mindless loop going on in my head, but he doesn’t release my hand.

“Yes, I need to know what you want me to do here, princess. He’s asking—no, he’s pretty much demanding I engage with him.” He touches my face again, and I realize it’s to wipe away a tear. “He wants to know if you are safe.”

A sob leaves my mouth before I’m quick enough to catch it. Sunny yanks me against his chest again, and I allow myself to cry. It’s ugly, and by the time I’m almost through, I’m embarrassed I let myself get that worked up. Sunny, however, takes it in stride, petting my hair and whispering encouraging murmurs all while keeping me from collapsing.

When I finally catch my breath, he continues talking as if I didn’t just need a twenty-minute cry. “I don’t know what is going on, Briar, but I do know he cares. Starla let it slip that this isn’t the first time she relayed a message for him, but no matter what I said, she wouldn’t divulge who else he’s spoken to or what was said.” I hear what he’s saying, but it’s hard to accept. It seems too good to be true.

“I told her to tell him you are safe. I know it was wrong to say anything before talking to you, but I just kept thinking how I would feel not knowing where you were and if you were okay, and I told her she could tell him.” The fact that he actually sounds remorseful makes me want to cry again.

I try to put him at ease. “It’s okay, I would have agreed to that.”

“I probably shouldn’t have since he left you here wondering what the fuck happened all this time.”

“Did she tell you anything? Like why I’m here?” Or more importantly, why they aren’t.

“The only thing she said was for me to tell you there are no what-ifs.” He shrugs like he has no idea what that could mean, but I know exactly what it means. It’s Ziv’s way of telling me I’m still his and he’s still mine. I wipe my own tears this time, wondering how the hell I could still be leaking after all this and when it will stop.

“What does that mean?” Sunny questions, picking up on the fact that it does mean something to me.

“It’s just what he always told me. When he first said I was his mate, I didn’t believe him. My father… He always told me I wasn’t worthy, so I was afraid he was wrong.” I sniffle and wipe under my nose. Gods, I need to pull myself together. “I asked?—”

“What if,” Sunny finishes for me, and I nod, using the time to catch my breath again.

“And he would always say there are no what-ifs . ”

“Okay, okay.” He nods as if that information now means more to him. “There has to be a reason he wasn’t in contact sooner. Is there some reason it would be dangerous for him to come here?”

I don’t know the answer to his question, but I don’t really think he expects me to either. It seems more like he’s speaking to himself. I decide to tell him what I know. “He didn’t want to take over the Ivy. He said if he killed Syrinx?—”

Sunny’s eyes go wide, and he covers my mouth with his hand to silence me. “Shush, princess. Some things shouldn’t be said out loud.”

I nod to let him know I understand, and he pulls his hand from my mouth, but I don’t feel the need to finish that sentence since he seemed to know where I was going. “He wasn’t afraid of anything,” I whisper. “His choices were always calculated.”

“There has to be a reason he’s staying there, and I would bet my pack it has everything to do with keeping you safe, because I know for certain there is one thing that scares him, and that’s losing you.” Even though the words aren’t coming from Ziv, it’s still something I’ve longed to hear. When I lean up on my toes and kiss Sunny, it’s one hundred percent in gratitude for him restoring a piece of me I thought I lost. He wraps his arms around my back, pulling my weight against him.

It’s not lost on me that this entire thing started because I was jealous, yet here he is, trying to mend my bond with someone else. Would I do the same for him? If how I felt seeing Starla just standing too close to him is any indication, then my answer would be a resounding no.

My kiss changes from a quick show of appreciation to something infinitely more meaningful the longer my lips are pressed against his. I was really worried about him and what could happen. The need to touch him, to ensure he’s here with me, has me pulling at his shirt in a bid to feel all of him.

Sunny proves to be just as greedy for my affection when he strips my clothes off while we’re still standing. When his arms go under my ass and he hoists me up, I wrap my legs around his waist. A hiss escapes me when he presses my back against the freezing cold wall, but the discomfort only lasts a heartbeat before his tongue and teeth are on my neck, overwhelming my senses.

The sound I make when he pushes inside me in a single stroke is part startled scream and part moan. I’m much more used to him preparing me with his hands and mouth, but the delicious stretch while my body spasms around him, trying to adjust to his size and invasion, is euphoric.

Sunny’s eyes, which are heavy-lidded and more beautiful than the sun, find mine. There’s desperation in his touch. He was just as apprehensive as I was, and it shows in the way he’s touching me. “Yes!” I moan the only word I’m capable of uttering in the moment. His eyes close in what I hope is surrender right before he reaches up with one arm and flattens his palm to the wall. From that moment on, the only thing I can do is hold on while he slams into me as if he wants to imprint himself on my skin.

When my first orgasm hits, it’s so sudden, my legs start shaking. If I had a shred of dignity, I would be embarrassed by the sounds I make, but Sunny erased any notion of awkwardness when he let me see that I affect him just as profoundly. I only realize the floating sensation I’m experiencing is real when I feel fur against my back after he carries me to the bed.

My arms flop to the sides now that I know I’m no longer responsible for holding myself up, and he takes that as his cue to kiss his way down my stomach until his head is between my legs. The greedy way he grabs my hips and jerks me closer to his mouth should have been a warning of what’s to come, but my brain is still foggy from the last orgasm. My back arches completely off the bed when he spears me with his tongue. There isn’t an inch of me that goes overlooked as Sunny teases, nips, and sucks until I’m a quivering mess, and only then does he climb up my body and stare down at me with rapt desire.

“Yes,” I murmur, giving him permission to continue, because I know he hasn’t had enough.

He lowers his body to mine, pinning me to the bed, and it dawns on me that there is nowhere else I would rather be.