Breaking through the Bond (Espen Jetties #2)

9. Hayes

9

HAYES

After breakfast, I parked my ass on the couch and turned the TV on. In the off-season I enjoyed watching the Emperors’ games. I missed it last night since I was over at Devon’s. The highlights came on and I let the information fade to the background as I thought back to the evening I had.

Devon took pity on me when I mentioned King was going out. He told me to come over and have dinner with him and Lincoln. Before King left, he asked if I had plans. It felt good to tell him I wasn’t sitting home alone all night. If I had, he would have tried to get me to go out. Not with him, but to call some of the other guys and do something.

It was nice hanging out with Devon and Lincoln. But it was also awful in the sense that they were very much in love, and I was pitifully on my own. They weren’t the types to shove their relationship in anyone’s face, but it was apparent how much they cared for one another.

Then to wake up and come face-to-face with King and his obviously more than a hookup, Jamie, I was just done. I needed to find someone. My friends were moving on, and I was standing in place. It sucked.

The door to the condo opened and slammed shut. King came racing into the room, looking all over before he found what he was searching for. He grabbed his laptop and dropped onto the couch beside me, his fingers moving fast over the keys once it turned on.

He didn’t speak, so I decided to be nosy and lean over to see what he was searching for.

Jamie Deary.

Jamie…

Deary…

“You’re sleeping with Jamie Deary?” I shouted as the pieces clicked into place.

“I know! What the fuck, Hayes? I had no idea!”

“How did you not know you were banging the Emperors’ owner’s brother?”

He whipped his gaze to mine. “Did you know?”

“How would I? I’m not the one taking him to bed.”

“Fuck,” he muttered and went back to the computer. He was freaking out, pounding on the keys. I needed to help him calm down.

I took the computer from him and sat it on the coffee table in front of us. “Tell me what happened.”

King turned on the couch, so one leg was bent on the cushion and he was facing me. I did the same, mirroring him. Obviously, this was upsetting him. I shut the TV off to give him my full attention then dropped the remote on the table next to the laptop.

“I was walking Jamie out when the elevator came to our floor. Marcus and Kasper were in it.”

“Okay. We see them sometimes.”

He waved me off. “Right, whatever. Anyway, they knew who Jamie was. Wondered why he wasn’t in Tim’s box last night watching the game. Marcus seemed oblivious to how tense everything suddenly became but Kasper, I could feel his eyes on me. Like he knew something was off. I kept my mouth shut until we were out on the curb to get Jamie’s car. I asked how he knew Tim Deary. He said he’s his brother. His fucking brother, Hayes!”

It also put King in an awkward position. Kasper, who owned the Jetties, was partners with Tim. They co-owned the Espen Sandpipers together. If King and Jamie dated, and something happened between them, would it put a strain on the relationship between Kasper and Tim? I’d like to think not, but who the hell knew.

I put my hands on King’s shoulders, could feel the muscles bunching under my palms. “Okay, I get it. He’s not a no one. His brother is very wealthy and well known. But why didn’t he tell you?” I started working my hands along his shoulders, hoping to relax some of the tension there.

“He said he’s used to keeping that part of his life in the shadows.”

“Jamie doesn’t want people to know he’s related to Tim? Maybe he doesn’t like being in the spotlight.”

King groaned and fell forward, his head coming to rest on my shoulder. I wrapped my arms around him. It felt so natural to do so, especially since King never shied away from affection with me or any of our friends.

“This doesn’t have to change anything. You obviously care about him if you’ve been with him more than once.” I felt like I had a lump in my throat after saying those words. Like I was choking suddenly. In all the time I’d been friends with King, he never fell in love. Never had feelings for anyone he slept with. Here he was getting worked up over finding out who Jamie was.

“How can I be with him if he’s trying to keep his life private and mine is out there like a giant neon sign for all to see?”

“I don’t know, but if you two want to make it work, you will.”

“I saw Kasper in the elevator on my way back up.”

“I thought they were leaving.”

King sighed and put his arms around me, his face turned toward my neck. His warm breath skated over my skin. I pulled him tighter to me.

Why did it feel like he was slipping away? King was my best friend. A constant in my life. I had a terrible feeling we were going to start drifting apart if he and Jamie were serious about one another. But I couldn’t say that. Couldn’t do anything to take happiness from King.

“Kasper forgot something, so he was going back up to get it. I couldn’t help myself and asked him about Jamie. At first, he hesitated like he wasn’t sure how much he should say. But then he told me that Jamie and I could make it work. That the age difference wasn’t a big deal. He and Marcus are fine with it.”

“How old is Jamie? I knew he was a little older than us, but I didn’t think by much.”

“Kasper mentioned a thirteen-year age gap so Jamie must be forty.” Kasper would know the ages of his players. It wasn’t surprising to me that he knew King’s. Kasper liked to be heavily involved with the team, more so than some other owners.

“It’s not that big.”

“No, I’m not worried about the age difference. You should have seen Jamie, Hayes. He hated that I found out who he was.”

“I don’t think it’s as bad as it seems. You would have eventually found out.”

“Yeah, but on his terms, not someone else saying it.”

I rubbed King’s back. I hated seeing him this way. “I get that. It shouldn’t be a deal breaker though. Any of this.”

King sat up so he could look into my eyes. “What do you mean?”

There was that damn emotion in my throat again. I swallowed twice before I could talk. “If you care for him, it shouldn’t matter who he is.”

“It’s what him being with me means. If he likes to stay out of the media, I’ll just put him smack dab in the center of it. I’m surprised no one has taken our picture yet.”

“Probably because they’ve seen you with enough people that it’s not a big deal.”

“Great time to bring up how I’m a whore.”

I shoved him gently. “You know I don’t think that. But you’re not known for committed relationships. I’m sure if someone saw you two together a few times, they’d figure it out.”

“Yeah, I guess.”

“You need to talk to Jamie.”

King scrubbed a hand over his face. “Not right now.” He turned to pick up the laptop, but I stopped him with a hand on his arm.

“Don’t. Whatever you find on there isn’t how you should learn more about Jamie. You need to ask him.”

“Fine,” he grumbled and closed the lid.

“Did Kasper say anything else?”

“He said if there’s something special between Jamie and me, that I had to focus on us, not the media, not anything online. None of it would matter. Only the person I cared about.”

“Kasper would know. He and Marcus are a power couple.”

King nodded but didn’t say anything else, just laid back on the couch, his head on the armrest. He propped his feet on my lap and wiggled his toes.

I glanced down at them. “I don’t know what you’re getting at here, but I’m not touching your hairy feet.”

“You probably only massage toes that are shaved and silky smooth.”

I shoved his feet off me, not sure why the reminder of women’s feet was suddenly bothering me. My emotions were all over the place and I wasn’t happy about it. I was usually pretty even and didn’t give a fuck who King slept with. But now in the face of him finding someone he cared about, I wasn’t sure what to do.

“Hey,” King said, nudging me with his foot. I smacked it away. “What’s going on?”

Leaning forward, I grabbed the remote and put the TV back on. “What are you talking about?”

“Something’s bothering you. Tell me.”

“It’s nothing. Don’t worry about it.” I couldn’t tell him how I was feeling anyway. I’d come off needy and very unlike myself.

I was raised by a woman who didn’t depend on anyone. Who worked her ass off to provide for us. I saw how she struggled but she never took it out on me. She always smiled when she saw me. Told me how proud she was. How we didn’t need anyone else. We were doing just fine.

It was hard to show her the same strength once she got sick. I wanted someone to lean on. Someone to help hold me up. But there wasn’t anyone. I missed her something fierce.

Whether or not he realized it, my relationship with King meant everything to me. It wasn’t healthy. I needed to find someone of my own, especially now with King having feelings for Jamie. He wouldn’t always live with me. Wouldn’t always be there to hang out with.

I didn’t have any family. No one to turn to who was related to me by blood. But I had my friends. I had my best friend. Even if he fell in love and moved on, I couldn’t picture King cutting me out of his life. He wasn’t like that.

King sat up and nudged me with his shoulder. “I know you. Don’t lie to me.”

Since I couldn’t tell him everything that was going on in my head and heart, I said, “I miss my mom.”

“Oh, Hayes.” He put his arm over my shoulders.

I shook my head. “It’s okay. Just thinking about her more today.” And how alone I felt sometimes.

“She would have been there watching the finals if she could have.”

Tears built in my eyes. “I know,” I whispered.

He carefully took the remote from me and went to the app where our movies were kept. He flipped through until he found Pride and Prejudice , the movie, not the TV show. The one from 2005 with Kiera Knightly and Matthew McFayden.

My mom had always loved Jane Austen. She’d read her books over and over. When the movie came out, I knew she wanted to see it, but we didn’t have a lot of money. She gave me a tiny allowance and I saved it until I was able to afford tickets to a matinee showing. She thought I was using the money for snacks after school or other stupid things, but none of that mattered when I could do something nice for her after all she’d done for me.

One morning, when I knew she didn’t have to work, I told her I wanted to skip school and go to the movies. It was something I never did. She agreed but I refused to tell her what movie we were going to see. She was just happy to spend the day out. I could tell by the smile on her face and how animated she was when she talked. The day meant so much to her.

When we got there and she heard what I was buying tickets for, her mouth dropped open. She couldn’t believe it.

We sat there in the theater, with very few others, and watched the movie. My mom couldn’t take her eyes off the screen. I really didn’t care about the movie since it was a romance, and I was still a kid. I just wanted to make her happy.

One night, many years later, when I had too much to drink, I told King that story. Ever since then, when I got upset thinking about my mom, he pulled me down on the couch and we watched Pride and Prejudice together. He never complained. Never made fun of the movie. And never told anyone. It was something we did together, or rather he did for me when he saw I was hurting.

So there we sat. The two of us on the couch. He kept his arm around me as we watched Elizabeth Bennet fall in love with Mr. Darcy.