Ceridor (Danubian #4)

12. Chapter Twelve

Chapter Twelve

Johann

In the gray light of dawn I felt Ceridor slide from my embrace. I heard him changing into his clothes and that fully woke me. Suddenly the cold terror of abandonment zapped me awake in fear that he would leave on his travels right away, without even saying goodbye.

"Where are you going?" I whispered harshly, unable to hold back the accusation in my tone.

Ceridor jumped with a soft yip and froze with his fingers still on the buttons of his shirt. We stared at each other a moment until he shook himself free of the shock and found his answer. "I mentioned yesterday I learned magic at Diana Monastery. There's a ritual we perform daily, and seeing as I can't exactly do that inside someone else's inn without permission, instead I go into the forest. This ritual is subtle enough to not disturb anything, and I've obtained permission from the local dryads."

I blinked at him. It was like he wasn't speaking Helvetican German anymore, and I couldn't quite process what language he'd switched into. But then my love of mythology and folklore kicked in, and it started to make sense. Like the mages of old, Ceridor was going into the forest to practice magic that blessed the world around him. And as was only polite, he'd first asked permission from the guardian spirits of the wooded area and its trees.

"I'm going with you," I said, flinging the blanket aside and getting up.

Ceridor blinked at me, once again frozen. "What for?"

"I want to learn magic too, after I finish all the trauma books I need," I answered, hustling into the set of clothes he'd left out for me.

"But you don't have to?" protested the beautiful man still fumbling with his shirt. "And it's a lot of work. It took me five years full-time at the monastery just to get the hang of it."

"I'm not saying this so you'll agree to be my boyfriend," I explained. It was a bit harsh, but I wanted to get that out of the way in case he was thinking it. "Ulbrecht studies magic to connect with the lantern gods—he wouldn't do anything unless it helped him to be a good king, and I want to be just like him. I can't marry the Danube River like he did, since I want to be with you, but I can at least do this."

But Ceridor seemed stuck on my prior words. "So rumors of the lanterns have reached as far as West Danube," he said, as if to himself.

I confirmed with a grunt and finished getting dressed.

The inn was up and bustling with the breakfast rush in full swing.

"Johann!" Effie chirruped, leaning over the kitchen counter to give me a kiss on the cheek.

An elderly woman nodded from back by the oven. "I'm Hilda. A set of twins for apprentices is a blessing indeed."

"Nice to meet you, madam," I said with a bow. "Thank you for taking us in."

" Sicher ," she confirmed. "I can see you're headed out. Be back by dinnertime so I can teach you how to take care of things. I'll set Effie up for the early shift with me, and then I'll have you close down the inn at night and make sure no one rambunctiously drunk gets in here."

"I'll be happy to," I answered, then sighed gratefully when my sister handed us steaming cups of honeyed tea, the same tea that West Danube was known for.

I stared at the golden liquid for a long moment and reconciled myself to the fact that I wouldn't see my home for a while, but Effie and I could create a new home here in East Helvetica. I took a sip and closed my eyes, feeling the weight of my loyalty to the kingship I'd lost and resolving to make my separation from West Danube only temporary. I would hide away here and help my sister build a new life for herself while I worked through the manuals on child abuse. I'd work on myself and grow stronger, then I'd go to Ulbrecht and take him up on his offer to let me fight for him, and possibly regain my crown in the process.

Ceridor and I took a moment to drink down the tea and let it warm us into full consciousness. My sister's cheeks were rosy as she bounced around the kitchen to Hilda's instructions of grabbing this and putting it there, take these and return them over there. Effie was so perky, you wouldn't know that her prior life had ended only yesterday. And yet Princess Alodia had never been a fan of the destiny decided for her, her lot in life to be handed off in a political marriage against her will. I was so glad to see her happy and productive.

" Danke ," I said, placing the empty cup back on the counter. When Ceridor finished his tea, he cocked his head toward the door. I took his hand and we headed out.

Ceridor

By the time we made it to the forest, Effie's delicious West Danubian honeyed tea had run through us and so Johann and I first had to piss in the woods before I led him to the area where I did my morning magical practice.

Johann's brown eyes danced with curiosity, his hair mussed from sleep and taking flight in places. I carded my fingers through the waves to try to tame them but that seemed to do the opposite. He giggled and smooched my lips, but I sent him a look that said we meant business out here—no time for fooling around in these woods.

Though even just yesterday his life had fallen apart, Johann stood tall with his shoulders back, his stature just a bit shorter than mine, though maybe he would grow a bit more now that his body wasn't under so much stress. His tan skin and rosy flushed cheeks made him look like his mother, whereas Effie had inherited her blond curls from their father's side of the family. Johann's pink lips quirked in a half smile as he shoved his hands in his pockets, regarding me. Then he cocked his dark brow as if to ask what I was waiting for, so I went ahead.

"Focus into your senses, and see whether you can see anything as I go through," I instructed. "In the metaphysics I learned at Diana Monastery, humans have three bodies: physical; etheric, otherwise known as the life force; and astral, or the aura. We only have a starter sheath rather than a full body on the mental plane. The goal of material existence as humans is to fully build out that mental body so we can leave physical incarnation and reunite permanently with our immortal souls. Etheric and astral perception is something humans are capable of, but ever since the Industrial Revolution it's been widely believed that only gifted people can do this."

He nodded, furrowing his brows in concentration. "Got it."

Spotting the rising sun cutting in around the tree trunks and casting a golden glow through town, I oriented myself to the east and squared my shoulders, sinking into the mental space wherein I sought connection with my deepest self.

Swinging my arms overhead, I clapped my palms together in case the gods weren't listening, then began the daily invocation and banishing ritual that brought the practitioner closer in line with Nature and its elements.

I drew the symbol for Air and set it alight in yellow flame. The symbol opened a portal to the god of the element and all the relevant symbolic correspondences. As the flaming yellow symbol opened and widened, I sang the invocation of Air and asked that it bless me and nurture my self-unfolding. With my inhalation I took in the yellow flame through my solar plexus, and with it all of the correspondences of Air, so that I might be more closely aligned with it. I imagined that it filled me to the brim, till I myself glowed yellow.

I sang the hymn to the god of Air, then with their guidance and protection, I drew the symbol in reverse and banished all unbalanced manifestations of Air. I took a deep breath in, and then blew out in a whoosh and swept my arms up, mentally banishing anything unbalanced far away from me into nothingness. Last of all, I clasped my hands together and bowed in thanks.

"I felt the wind blowing," whispered Johann, almost to himself.

I nodded in approval but didn't speak to him, instead rotating around to the south wherein I drew the symbol for Fire.

In this way I declared peace in the four corners of the world with the cardinal directions and the magical elements from the Renaissance: Air, Fire, Water, Earth. Though I worked with the corners, this was no square. Rather it was a rotation around, a Sphere of Protection.

At the gate of Water, I invoked the Antlered One. As always, he appeared in my mind's eye so readily it gave me pause. Though he was an old god from ancient Gaul, his connection to the Danube River ran back millennia, and I'd even caught him—or more likely, a follower of his that reflected his likeness—walking through the Alpine woods a couple of times.

"Wow..." said Johann in awe, and I wondered what he was able to perceive of all this. I kept focused on the ritual, since we would talk later, but his little gasps told me he could at least sense something out of the ordinary, and that made me proud.

After completing the gate of Earth, I rotated back around to the east where I'd begun. There, I did three invocations of Spirit—below, above, and within—for a total of seven gates.

After all seven invocations, with the presence of the gods, I closed my eyes and held still and prayed for a moment. I introduced them to Johann, in case they noticed him there with me and watching. Other than that, I thanked them for my safety over the last day, and for their protection over me when I helped to get Effie and Johann out of West Danube. Then I listened for as long as I'd prayed, in case they wanted to tell me anything, nudge me or send me vibes.

With one last mental 'thank-you' I extended my arms out to the side. The final part of the ceremony involved expanding a protective sphere from my solar plexus to my immediate surroundings and rotating it rapidly, cleansing the space of any unbalanced energies, then dissipating the sphere, though if I ever had a home of my own I'd be able to then set it on the ground and have it active as protection throughout the day.

I pulled a deep breath in, and was about to formulate the starter sphere when I opened my eyes and found Johann standing right in my space. I let the breath out in a harsh shriek and spluttered. "Wh-wh-wh—"

Johann hugged me and smooched my cheek. "Great job, you did it!"

He squeezed me tight and smooched me again, so I hugged him back and finally got my bearings. "I wasn't done yet, Schatz . I still need to do the final step, but you crossed the barrier circle..."

He'd clearly noticed some things while I did the ritual, but those things didn't include the protective circle the mage wields around themselves while doing the work.

Johann jumped and looked around, though still not releasing me. " Hoppala! Sorry, everyone?"

I huffed, but it turned into an exasperated laugh. Was he apologizing to the gods?

It seemed Johann had no intention of releasing me, so I extended my arms once more and focused. Starting the sphere at my solar plexus, I then expanded it out to fill the little space in the forest that I tended to use. The white sphere sailed right through Johann without issue—though Johann jumped and then sneezed against his shoulder. Just for good measure, to make sure I did this last important step thoroughly, I rotated the sphere a moment longer than usual, then finally let it dissipate.

Only then did I allow myself to embrace my sweet Johann and sink into the hug.

" Hmm ," he hummed in pleasure. "I want to learn this."

That caught me off guard. "Really?"

He chuckled, shaking in my arms. "Is it that hard to imagine? You yourself lived at a monastery for five years and learned magic because you knew it would help with your bardic techniques."

I couldn't argue with that. "Fair. The path lies open to you, after your trauma work. I can show you what books I have, though the introductory one where you should really start is at the monastery library. I'll write to Marit and pay him to copy it for you."

"Write this ritual down so I can get started in the meantime," he ordered. "I don't have to be able to sing to do it properly, right?"

"No, darling," I said with indulgence, smoothing my palms across his back. "That's just my version; I love singing to the gods."

"I'm glad you do; it was beautiful to witness," he said.

Relishing the quiet moment, we held each other as the sun rose through the forest and blessed the morning.