Ceridor (Danubian #4)

19. Chapter Nineteen

Chapter Nineteen

Johann

I'd just finished dinner for the guests at the inn while Effie kneaded the bread to set it to rise overnight when Ceridor came home after reporting to his father and brother.

Little Dunu, as usual, was watching the seven candles burn in the beaded candle holder she'd brought us, her eyes twinkling with glee and the rest of her fidgeting unconsciously, her webbed hands gripping the counter while she chewed on the edge and drooled a bit.

Ceridor came through the door, his eyes tired, but as he found me he sent over a soft smile. He was about to pass by, heading into the hallway that led to the back rooms, when he noticed Dunu and just about jumped out of his skin.

Then several things happened in rapid succession.

Ceridor's eyes flew wide at the candles and suddenly he shouted "No!" and dove at Dunu. His bare hands flew about in a flurry, pinching out the flames.

Dunu erupted in snarls and lunged at the candles, but Ceridor blocked her by flinging his good arm out, so she grabbed his forearm and bit him, even continuing after Ceridor raised his arm and lifted her into the air.

"Oh no!" Effie came from the back. "Don't blow out the candles, Ceridor, the little girl likes them—"

"Wait, Effie." I grabbed her shoulders and stepped in front of her. My heart leapt into my throat, but at least I had her safely behind me.

Dunu snarled again and tore at Ceridor's flesh, where his blood started to ooze.

"Stop!" I commanded and reached for her, but just at that moment Ceridor shouted "White!" and everyone froze.

Transfixed, I watched as a white ball of light formed at the juncture of Ceridor's ribs, at his solar plexus, which was where initiates trained to access their life force in the magical tradition we studied.

The white expanded until it encompassed Ceridor's entire body, including his arm where Dunu was attached. The creek sprite promptly stopped chewing on him. Had he stunned her?

But Ceridor did not seem to be on the attack. He was not tensed to fight. Despite Dunu biting him, his hand was not clenched in a fist, but rather his fingers moved softly, supply, though my lover's gaze was down. It was the expression he took on when he was turning inward, focusing on the subtle planes of existence, in this case the etheric and astral plane, where his ball of energy washed over him and the creek sprite. Dunu held onto Ceridor's arm so she wouldn't fall, but she dislodged her teeth and even smoothed over the wound with her webbed fingers, as if she were sorry. Suddenly the blood disappeared, having been etheric and not physical.

Then the white sphere expanded to touch my outstretched hand, and the instant it made contact with my fingertips, my vision changed.

Everything in the room sharpened.

The white sphere glistened until it wasn't just white, but an amalgamation of all the colors that combined to make white. It rotated, three layers of it, each in a different direction so quickly my eyes could barely make it out. I knew this to be a magical technique of Ceridor's, something he'd practiced for seventeen years since first learning it at the Diana Monastery. Not only did it spin, it also radiated outward, flinging life force like a ball of lightning.

When the gleaming white sphere expanded to cover my whole body, I felt a shift in my consciousness. Effie behind me gave a yip and then said, " Oh! I can see her!" but all I could focus on was how my thinking had changed.

My worries and constant inner mental negativity from having been abused as a child were utterly obliterated and scattered to the wind. The patterns in my brain were still there, but it was like a riverbed after the river had changed course and gone elsewhere.

I felt unstoppable, and immortal. I felt old .

I had lived dozens of lifetimes. Indeed, I'd had a turn at everything, as a human a few dozen times, but before that as plants and bugs, as a robin, a turtle, and as a white stag that leapt in the forests of summer.

I had been all things previously.

But what was more, my emotional turmoil simply didn't matter anymore. It was just one part of my existence, but it didn't need to define me. I could notice it and either experience it more deeply or let it flow on by if I so chose. I was the master of myself. I was the one in control of my thoughts and emotions, not the other way around.

I had been lifted above my everyday concerns, and the patterns of thought that no longer served me. I had been transformed.

But best of all, even though Ceridor's life force rushing through had pushed my consciousness further than I'd experienced before, along with it came the utter conviction that I could build the road myself to get there, brick by brick. Ceridor's etheric flow had given me a glimpse, but I could get there, eventually, by my own power.

The white ball expanded to fill the dining hall of the inn before it dissipated into nothing. A couple of the guests who were eating dinner reacted, looking around as if they'd sensed something they couldn't pinpoint. One guest sneezed and brushed his shoulder off like something had landed on him, but then he shook himself and returned to his dinner like nothing had happened.

Indeed, as the white power dissipated, I felt my prior consciousness coming back, such a familiar pattern, and therefore easy and comfortable even if it no longer served me, returning me to my old ways.

"Come here honey," my sister beckoned to Dunu. "I can actually see you! Have some bread; come here and let me look at you."

Dunu seemed to have lost her anger and went over for her dinner rolls, diligently barking " Dank! " after inhaling each one; all the while Effie petted her hair, the wet ribbons of kelp, and beheld her with awe.

But my lover still stood frozen, his arm out, his eyes locked on the waxy mess at the end of the counter, a look of both horror and dismay that set alarm bells ringing in my head.

"They've been lit in Helvetica," he whispered in shock. "I'm too late."

"Darling," I prompted. "Ceridor."

He blinked. That was progress.

"Tell me everything," he said softly, just above a whisper, his chest rising and falling now, finally breathing again. "Tell me what happened."

I told him of how Dunu had found me at the creek and followed me to the inn.

"She came right inside my protections," said Ceridor, his gaze still on the candles and yet also far away, as if he were gazing at what the candles were on the astral plane.

I told him of how Dunu would bring us fish and Effie loved feeding her. Then one day Dunu had brought a little contraption that looked like a beaded rosary but was actually a holder for seven small candles. We found candles small enough and lit them. She was very happy about that, so we lit them whenever she came by. Then one day she took the first candleholder away and brought this blue one by, and we'd been lighting that one for about two months now.

Here I'd been so excited for Ceridor to meet our little creek sprite, especially since I could see her with only two years of magical practice. I'd thought my partner would be pleased and proud of me, but from the worry in his eyes, it looked more like my sister and I had gotten ourselves unintentionally involved in something larger that we didn't understand.

"Was the first one ruby red beads?" asked Ceridor, surprising me.

" Ja, genau ," I confirmed.

He nodded slowly, then swallowed, his eyes still on the blue beaded candle holder, though it was covered in melted wax. "So it was lit in Helvetican territory before she delivered it to Peter. We'd diligently made sure the rosary crossed into Danubian territory without being lit, but unknowingly our efforts had already been sabotaged."

"She's fading," my sister said, her eyes beseeching. "Is it her, or just that I'm going back to not being able to see her?"

That snapped Ceridor out of his reverie. "If you can see her now, it's because of something I did. Enjoy it; it likely will only last a few minutes."

Effie gave a sad little hum and handed Dunu another roll.

"Can we take a walk?" I asked my partner. "I want to talk with you, while I'm still like this."

His eyes widened in recognition. "Oh love, let me look at you." He came close, cupping my face and looking into my eyes. I didn't know what he saw. Then he held out his hand. "Come, quickly."