Chase Our Forever (Sutten Mountain #3)

20. Dean

20

DEAN

My heart races as I pull into the driveway of the house. I come down the driveway a little faster than I normally do, but it’s only because it’s been a few hours since Liv sent an update, and I’m a little worried about not hearing from her since.

She’d sent me photos of their day together, which I appreciated. They’d gotten out of the house and went to Wake and Bake, hanging out with Pippa and Lexi. Liv had fought me when I told her to drive the second car I own around town for their activities, but she finally relented when I insisted that every nanny drove it. It was kind of true; some of the nannies did, but I really only said that because Liv’s old car was not something I’d wanted my daughter to be in. If I thought about it too long, I didn’t like the idea of Liv in it either.

The car parked perfectly back in its place in the garage tells me they’re home. Liv just maybe hasn’t checked her phone in a while. I allow myself to let out the smallest sigh of relief. They’re safe inside.

I pull my truck into the garage next to the SUV and don’t even bother to gather my old coffee or bring in my briefcase. I’m out of the driver’s seat as quickly as possible and practically running to get inside and see my daughter.

The moment I open the door, I’m hit with the aroma of basil and garlic. It smells incredible, and I’ve barely stepped foot inside.

The sound of Clara giggling in the kitchen makes my chest feel a little less tight. She’s here, and she’s fine—the infectious laugh of hers showing she’s more than fine.

I step into the kitchen to find the most adorable scene ever. Clara sits on the counter, flour all over her hands and face, as she looks at Liv with the widest smile. Liv stands next to her, busy kneading dough and making funny faces at Clara every time she flips it over.

Two pizzas sit on top of the oven, presumably cooling. There’s a large salad bowl already on the table, as well as what looks to be a spread of fruit and vegetables to snack on.

“Okay, last one. Are you ready?” Liv asks Clara, handing her the ball of dough.

Clara excitedly nods her head as she takes the dough. She holds it to her chest for a moment with a mischievous grin on her face.

Liv nods. “One last time. Do it.”

They both smile so wide I’m wondering what the backstory is of whatever they’re doing. I don’t have to wonder for long. Clara chucks the ball of dough onto the counter and lets out the loudest scream of delight.

“Perfect!” Liv tells her, sprinkling some flour in front of her. She spreads the ball of dough Clara just threw onto the counter, while Clara laughs with excitement over getting to toss the dough around like that.

I clear my throat, letting them know I’m home. Liv looks up, her smile faltering slightly when her eyes meet mine.

Before we can exchange any words, Clara’s excitedly yelling my name. “Daddy! We throwing pizza.”

“Well, just the dough,” Liv corrects, letting out a nervous laugh. Her hands continue to spread the dough into a circle.

“You want to throw one, Daddy?” Clara asks, excitedly putting her flour-covered hands on her cheeks.

I shake my head, loving the bright smile on my daughter’s face. I don’t even have to ask her. She had a good day with Liv, and it’s so refreshing to know that. “I’m okay. You have fun today?”

The little giggle from Clara melts my heart. “We had best day without you, Daddy.”

I raise my eyebrows. “Oh, did you?”

Liv shakes her head as she begins to spoon what looks like homemade pizza sauce onto the pizza dough. “We had a good day, but she did ask about you a lot.”

Clara’s face pinches together in confusion. “No, I didn’t.”

Liv gives me an apologetic look, but the apology isn’t needed. My feelings aren’t hurt in the slightest. In fact, it feels like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders to know Clara enjoyed herself so much.

“So, what did you do today?” I ask, taking a seat on one of the barstools at the counter.

The smell of the finished pizzas sitting on top of the oven makes my mouth water. I must admit, although I don’t mind cooking, often Clara and I will eat carryout, or I’ll throw together the simplest of meals. It isn’t often we eat home-cooked meals in this kitchen—unless my mom’s dropped them off for us.

Clara throws her hands in the air dramatically as she shakes her head. “I can’t tell you everything…we did a lot .”

I smile at the way she emphasizes a lot. Or maybe I smile because of the way Liv stares right at me with a light in her eyes so bright that it makes it hard to fight a smile when sunshine bottled up into a person is beaming at you.

“What if I want to know everything?” I counter, my ears burning with having Liv’s eyes still trained on me.

Clara lets out an exasperated sigh. She rolls her brown eyes at me. “We saw Pippa and Lexi.” She looks over at Liv with a mischievous grin before looking back at me and covering her mouth with her hand like she’s telling a secret. “And Pippa let me try one of her new cake pops.”

“Oh, yummy,” I respond. “Do you need help?” I ask Liv as she picks up a bowl of freshly grated cheese.

She shakes her head as she begins to sprinkle it on the top. “Nope. I told you I’d make dinner. Just sit and take a breath for a moment.”

Clara reaches into the bowl and helps her sprinkle cheese over the top. “We called Mimi to find out your favorite pizza. Sausage and pepperoni, right, Daddy?”

My eyes immediately find Liv’s. She stares down at the pizza, avoiding eye contact with me as she carefully places slices of pepperoni on the pizza. “Yeah, that’s right,” I get out, wondering why the fact that she called my mom to ask means something to me. When I’d asked her to prepare meals during the week, I’d meant more that she can make something that Clara will like, and I’ll just eat it as well. I hadn’t expected her to go out of her way to make my favorite as well.

But she had. I want to thank her, but I keep my gratitude to myself, unsure if I want her to know how much it means to me that she did that.

“How was your day?” Liv asks.

I sigh, thinking of how busy today was. It felt like I was putting out one fire after another, but this time of year is always busy. People decide right before ski season that they want to buy properties here in Sutten. We also help manage a lot of the rental properties here in town, and today I was dealing with a lot of that. “My day is much better now,” I finally get out, meaning every word.

Liv smiles at me, and fuck, why do I like it when she smiles at me like that? Why does it make me want to smile back? Why am I wanting to say more to get my daughter’s nanny to smile at me? It isn’t professional—it’s far from it. Maybe I can just blame the long day for my lapse in professionalism.

She nods, letting me get away with the confession that my day is far better now that I’m back home with Clara—and her. “I wasn’t sure exactly what time you’d be home, so I wanted to make your pizza last. It’ll go into the oven now, so it stays warm, but there are other pizzas if you’re hungry now, plus a salad and some snacks.”

“I want my cheese pizza!” Clara declares, stepping off her step stool and running toward the set table.

“Let’s wash your hands first,” Liv offers, sliding the pizza into the oven. She wipes her hands on an old pair of jeans that have so many holes in them they might as well be shorts.

Clara surprisingly listens to her. She turns around and heads to the sink as Liv assists her in washing her hands.

“Wow,” I remark, sliding off the barstool. “It seems when I ask you to wash your hands, you have nothing but protests.”

“What’s protest mean?” Clara asks as Liv helps rub soap all over her hands.

“It means when I ask you to wash your hands, you tell me you can’t do it, but when Liv asks you, you listen right away. What’s up with that?”

Clara shrugs, a wide smile on her face as she looks at Liv. “Livvy ask nicer.”

This makes Liv let out a snort of a laugh.

A low growl comes from me as I raise my eyebrows. “I ask nicely, too.”

Clara finishes washing her hands before wiping them off on a towel. “Sure, Daddy.” She laughs at me and shakes her head as if my comment is the most ridiculous thing ever. “You’re the best, Daddy. But you are a little grumpy.” She holds up her thumb and index finger to really hit home with her words before she skips over to the dinner table.

“She’s so sassy,” Liv comments as she fills up a pitcher with water.

I let out an amused sigh. “Yeah, she got that from her mother.”

Liv stops, her eyes trained on me as a soft smile passes on her lips. I realize this might be the first time I’ve openly talked about Selena with her. It felt good to be able to share the small nuances of my daughter that she got from her beautiful mother. I make a mental note to do it more.

We just stare at each other for a moment. It’s one of those moments that feels both heavy and light all at once. Light, because even though today was only her first official day, having Liv here feels like she’s this light at the end of the tunnel for both Clara and me. That maybe with Liv’s help, we’ll finally find the consistency and routine we’ve been looking for.

It also feels heavy, because despite knowing I absolutely shouldn’t, I’m fond of Liv. Not because she’s Clara’s nanny…but because she’s just Liv. And I know if she stays around long enough—which I really hope she does—that she has the potential to mean a lot to me.

More than she should.

And that realization is absolutely terrifying.