Crave (Beneath The Secrets #3)

6. Alexei

CHAPTER 6

ALEXEI

She had a date tonight. Following previous patterns, they always go wrong.

I don’t know why. She is the most amazing girl to ever walk this earth.

No one compares to my Lara. It makes me want to murder the men that upset her.

Well, I have. On many occasions, I’ve killed men and women who have hurt her.

I know, when she calls me late at night, or gives me her slight smile, she isn’t okay.

When she fiddles with her rings, tugs on her clothes, and bites on her thumb nail, it tells me something isn’t right.

She did all of those things today.

“You know we won’t be able to do this forever?”

I frown, processing her words.

“I don’t understand. Why not?”

There is not a future where I am not here with her. It doesn’t exist. I won’t let it.

“One of these times, I’ll find someone who likes me.” She stares hard at me, like I’m supposed to say something in return.

But the answer is obvious. Shrugging, I look back at the TV. “I like you. It’s enough.”

She chews on her lower lip in silence. Her breath catches a few times, like she’s getting ready to say something, but doesn’t.

“There’s more to a relationship than just watching silly shows. What happens when one of us wants, um…” Her voice trails off.

“What? I can make some popcorn if that’s what you want?” I watch her eyebrows draw together.

No, that wasn’t what she’s going for.

“I mean, something more? Niki ran off to bring home a woman who stabbed him, and yet still loves her.” Her pink lips turn and she chews on the inside of her cheek.

I have no idea what she’s trying to say.

The look on my face must show my confusion because she makes an exasperated sigh.

“What if one of us gets a partner? Then this—” Her finger points back and forth between us. “—won’t work anymore.”

“Huh? I have partners. Niki, Jax. Mikhail, too.” Leaning back, I tuck my arm behind my head.

When she talks in circles like this, it gets tiring.

“No. Nikolai has Mila now. Jax has Sofia. That’s the kind of relationship I’m talking about.” Her thumb works up to find its way between her teeth.

She’s stressed over Niki, I bet. She was convinced he was leaving to die in Russia.

“What if I get a boyfriend?” She twists the blanket around her hand and finds the television suddenly fascinating.

“Oh. Well, nothing would change.” I push the blanket off and grab my empty cup. “Here, give me your glass.” I stand in front of her and gesture with my hand.

Why does she turn her head away? I’m right here.

“Alexei. If I find someone, we can’t do this anymore.” She circles her arm around where I was sitting under the covers next to her.

Blinking, I try to figure out what she’s implying.

I go into the kitchen to buy some time. When she’s stressed out, she only drinks water.

Everything else is “bad” for her, or so she says.

After I set her drink next to her, I crawl over her legs to my side. “It’s simple then. No boyfriends allowed.”

She scoffs. “What, then no girlfriends for you?”

Swirling my cup, the ice cubes clink against the side before I swallow. “I have you.”

Her eyes narrow so tightly, I can barely see the blue. “Not the same, Alexei.”

When she crosses her arms and slumps against the backrest, I know she’s done.

She’s so confusing.