Crave (Beneath The Secrets #3)

13. Lara

CHAPTER 13

LARA

I thought I had a hold of myself. But seeing Nikolai and Mila, with those shiny new gold bands on their fingers, just made me feel shitty all over again.

Every time I turn around, no matter how hard I try, it seems like I’m being pushed away or left out.

Am I not good enough? Am I too fat and they’re embarrassed by me?

My hand reflexively reaches down and pinches the soft skin of my belly through my shirt.

Probably. It has to be something like that?

What is wrong with me?

Tears stream down my face and leave a salty burn on my lips.

All I want is to be wanted. Not ostracized by my own family.

This hurts so fucking bad.

When I hear the footsteps behind me, it irritates me knowing I don’t have any peace and quiet. “Alexei, I don’t have the patience right now,” I say without turning around.

I love him, but trying to explain to him why I’m needing to get away could be exhausting.

Knowing all he wants is to make me happy, I know it isn’t fair to him.

But right now, I want more than a joke or a treat.

I just want someone to make me forget the pain. To distract me so I can disconnect from this doubt and self-loathing.

To tell me it isn’t my fault.

The crunching of the leaves on the dry ground gets louder.

Leaning against a tree, my arms cross in frustration. “Alexei, unless you’re here to bend me over and make me forget my name, I’d really like some time alone,” I say, maybe just half sarcastically.

If only. It’s hard to ignore how crazy hot Alexei is sometimes.

The little bit of wine I had this morning on an empty stomach would give me a sense of courage I normally don’t have.

A strange click comes from behind me.

“Alexei, please?”

Something cold and metal presses against the back of my neck.

“I don’t know why you keep calling his name, he isn’t going to save you. But you keep begging. I like it.” The deep voice has a tinge of an accent that I know too well.

I freeze, my stomach rolling in panic. “What do you want?”

“You’re going to come with me.” He presses the hard object into the bottom of my skull.

It has to be a gun barrel.

My hands fly up reflexively in surrender. I’m completely unarmed. I don’t even think I have my phone with me.

Stupidly, my anger got the best of me.

“Fine, I’ll go. Are you sure you don’t want a good time here?” I try to wiggle my hips suggestively as I walk over the rough terrain.

If I can delay him for a few minutes, I know Alexei will come and find me.

He always does.

There’s a forceful shove between my shoulder blades and I tumble forward into the dirt.

“Move, you Volkov bitch,” he spits.

Rough wood digs into my palms.

He’s pissing me off. “My brother is going to kill you for that.” I turn in time to see a flash of green hair and a purple shirt. “You have got to be shitting me. I’m being taken by a fucking clown?”

This has to be a whole new level of low in my life.

“Get up.” His oversized shoe lands against my ribs.

I guess I’m lucky, the blunt end softens the blow.

“Fine, asshole.” I get up in a hurry, losing one of my heels in the process.

Dammit. That was one of my favorites.

Whatever. Limping on a four inch lift is a pain, so I pull my other pump off after only a few steps.

“Keep going.” He prods. “To your left. The white van.”

As I get closer, the rear doors open and a shorter, thin man pops out.

His trimmed beard doesn’t cover the smirk beneath his dark glasses.

“Ah, the princess. Welcome, Lara. We’re going to have such a nice time.” He opens a black cloth bag just as my wrists are locked behind my back by the green haired asshole.

Why does he look familiar? I can’t quite place it, but I feel like I should know.

“I can see you’re confused. Let me clear things up. My name is Kirill.”

As he drops the bag over my head, my blood runs cold.

I remember now.

He works for my father.