CHAPTER 36
ALEXEI
Song, Circus Psycho, Diggy Graves
I don’t know how much longer I can take of this.
The urge to touch her, to be near her, it’s becoming overwhelming.
I’m not used to holding back when I want something. It’s eating me apart from the inside.
Keeping her at arm’s length is getting more difficult.
It’s like they’re shrinking.
I’m a T-Rex, trying to push her away with the world’s tiniest limbs, while I want to devour her with the biggest appetite.
Motoring through the dark streets of Vegas, I let my inner dinosaur roar.
The primal side of me that wants to pin her down and ravage her like I’m starving.
Killing the engine and pushing my bike the last two blocks helps take some of the edge off of my antsy energy.
It’s easy to slip into her dark house when I already know the code.
She can’t hide anything from me. I know her better than I know myself.
Padding through the kitchen, I reflexively dig my hand into the candy jar she keeps full for me and unfurl one of the shiny wrappers.
Shoving the crinkly foil into my pocket, I push the sugary treat between my teeth and cheek, then sneak towards her room.
The regular breathing tells me she’s asleep.
My perfect angel with her blonde hair spread over the pillows.
Tracing the silky locks, I curl my finger around the end and pull it up to my nose to inhale her shampoo.
Even though I didn’t tug on her scalp, she shifts in her sleep. A soft sound that ends in a low moan.
“Do you taste as sweet when you’re dreaming, pchelka?” I let the tendril fall, then brush my lips across her cheek, letting her hot breath bathe me before I stand.
She makes me drunk on her.
It’s like a drug that calms me. Just being near her makes me want to do more for her than myself.
There’s never been a time it hasn’t been about her.
Shit, she’s moving again.
I think she’s going to wake up. Backing out slowly, I wind up in the side of the kitchen near the laundry.
Well, the least I can do is fold her clothes for her while I’m here. She’ll never know it was me.
The temptation is too much when I discover a sultry red thong.
That’s coming home with me.
She won’t notice.
Gray begins to fill the windows as dawn approaches. One last handful of candy to tide me over until I get home. Gotta keep my energy up, this watching her all of the time is exhausting work.
Worth it.