Cruel Alpha Daddy (Silver Meadows Wolves #4)

Chapter 4 - Fiona

My chest is so tight, I can’t breathe. The shock of seeing Rider seems to have melted my brain, and I can’t think, let alone speak.

Probably a good thing.

While Rider and Tobias face off, I keep my mouth shut and pray… but I don’t know what I’m praying for. I want to get out of here and back to my son, of course. But having Rider so close to me is awakening urges I went to a lot of trouble to bury.

I haven’t been with anyone since then, and I have spent so many long, painful nights dreaming of him and missing him. This could be my only chance to ask why he left me.

Mixed up in my fear, a horrible fury burns. I can’t forget the last thing Rider said to me, or those wonderful nights we shared.

Wonderful nights and eternal promises that were shattered by his brutal final words.

While Tobias bruises my arms with his hard hands and Rider talks casually about trapping me with marriage vows, tears begin to trickle down my cheeks. I close my eyes and let the past rise up and take me, all the barriers in my mind coming down as I remember what I swore to forget.

The first moment I saw him, my heart went out to him. I’d never seen such a broken soul in all my life. I could tell just by looking that he’d never known love. No one had ever taken care of him.

I wasn’t scared, not for a second. I know I should have been, but something about Rider just felt safe. All the savagery he wore didn’t look real to me. All I could see was the broken heart underneath.

Looking at him now, I have to admit I barely know him. He is fierce and strong, with much bigger muscles and cold, hard eyes. Threat emanates from him, and I can tell most of the pack is afraid of him. I can’t see a hint of that sadness or vulnerability that drew me in before.

But he still doesn’t scare me.

Not in the sense that I believe he’d turn that violence on me, no. But I am afraid of what he could do to my heart if I was stupid enough to let him in. And terrified of what might happen if he finds out about my son.

Our son.

Rider finishes his challenge with Tobias, and I’m relieved when the brute shoves me into Rider’s arms. My relief doesn’t last long. The second I feel Rider’s hands on me, my body begins to throb, deep inside.

Not now! Fuck!

There is no stopping it. My skin is tingling and rushing with goosebumps as my lips begin to burn. The strength goes out of me, and I let Rider practically carry me towards the camp.

When I see the women and children, my lust is washed away in a wave of shock. All the members of the pack look disheveled, dressed in old clothes or handmade garments. Children of all ages stand with their mothers, looking dirty, tired, and almost desperate.

Have they ever been to school? What is happening in this pack?

I’m reeling so hard from seeing how the pack lives, I barely notice the conversation going on around me. One of the women hurries over and wraps me in a soft dress. To my astonishment, it’s handmade wool, spun as fine and soft as Egyptian cotton.

Rider holds my hand as we walk to the top of the camp. The memories come again, and my grip on him tightens a little.

Why, Rider?

I look down at the grass, letting the memories come. I’ve kept it inside for so long it’s like cutting open an old, infected wound. It hurts like hell, but the relief from letting out the poison makes it almost pleasurable.

Six years ago… and the pain is as fresh as if it was yesterday.

After my aunt died, I sat by her bed for a long time. She had been very close to me even after she broke away from the rest of the family. I never knew the full story and didn’t need to. I was close enough to my family in Silver Meadows, but some secrets of the past were unknown to me.

All I knew was that Aunt Mabel loved me, and that she was alone at the end of her life, so I had to go. After she died, there was no one to call, no one else to mourn her or grieve with me. I made arrangements with the hospital and went back to the hotel to find Rider.

It was the worst night of my life, but I was hoping it could also be the best. I’d ask Rider to come home with me, and he’d accept, of course. We’d get married and live in Silver Meadows, embracing the future together.

Back at the hotel, Rider comforted me while I talked about Aunt Mabel. The pain was creeping up on me, slowly drowning me, so I reached out to the love of my life, knowing he would save me. He was the only thing in this world that could heal me and give me a future.

Instead, he crushed my soul.

“I’ll be leaving for Silver Meadows in two days,” I said. “I can’t wait to show you my home and introduce you to my friends. We can finally be together and plan our future.”

“What?”

“I can’t stay in Delta forever. I was only here for Aunt Mabel. It’s time to go home.”

“What? No!”

“No, what?”

“No, I’m not going to Silver Meadows with you! What the fuck do you think this is?”

“Love! I thought you loved me… that you wanted to be together!”

“Not forever. Jeez, babe, I’m a drifter, I told you. I can get tied down. I’m surprised I stayed this long.”

“Rider—”

“No, look. I think I should just leave now. This is getting way too heavy for me. Thanks for everything, though. You helped me through a tough spot, and you’re a nice girl.”

The pain of his last words to me is so intense, I stumble, making Rider grab my hand and hold me up. The elder woman conducts the ceremony and asks my name, trying to reassure me. Everything is happening so fast, I can’t follow it.

The morning after Rider left, I was sick. I tried to blame it on my grief and broken heart, but I knew before I took the test that I was pregnant. I went home alone, and the only thing that saved me from complete despair was the child I carried.

Caleb. Light of my life, my son, my baby. I will always be strong for you, even if I can’t be for myself.

As the ceremony finishes, Rider picks me up and turns around, facing the cheering crowd. The nasty group who kidnapped me shift into their wolf forms and rush from the clearing to go hunting. Rider carries me into the trees towards a big, luxurious tent set some distance from all the others.

It’s almost the size of a small cabin, very tall and made with heavy folds of canvas. It even has little screen windows cut into it. I’m relieved that Rider claiming me has made the others back off. It’s also a great relief that his tent is set some distance away from the rest of the camp. I really thought I was going to get attacked by every male in the pack, maybe even passed from tent to tent. I suppress a shudder as I push those thoughts away.

Rider carries me through the zippered opening and puts me down on my feet. When he turns to secure the front, I bolt immediately for the back of the tent. He curses softly and chases me. The tent is a decent size, furnished with a small table, lots of cushions, some kitchen equipment, and even a bed. I take all this in as I run across the small space, slamming myself against the back wall and trying to tear my way through so I can get out.

The fabric is extremely tough, and the edges are hammered into the ground. I can’t rip through it or pull it up to get under. Seconds later, Rider grabs me, and I twist in his arms, slapping him across the face.

“Let me go!” I scream.

Rider grabs my arms and shakes me, keeping my hands by my sides, so I can’t slap him again. “Will you calm the fuck down?” he growls.

“No, I will not!” I shriek. “What the fucking hell is this? Let me go, you asshole, this is kidnapping!”

“By the old laws, it is a legal marriage,” he says softly. His beautiful green eyes are inches from mine, gleaming with that wicked intensity I fell in love with.

He’s so broken, so damaged… but so very strong.

“You can’t do this!” my voice comes out in a wail.

“I just did,” Rider answers, his voice rising. “Will you stop struggling? I swear to fucking God, if you don’t simmer down, I’ll tie you up.”

“You wouldn’t dare!”

“Yes, I damn well fucking would!” He shakes me, hard. “You don’t get it, do you? They were going to tear you apart!”

That makes me pause. I stop fighting against his grip and take a deep breath.

“I need you to understand,” he says urgently. “This was the only thing I could do to keep you safe. They wouldn’t have just killed you—they would have tortured you for hours, and—”

His voice falters, and he looks away. Even though he doesn’t let go of me, he loosens his grip. When his eyes come back to mine, his gaze is calm but stern.

“If you try to escape, and they find you, it will go very badly. I need you to trust me and stay here where I can keep you safe.”

I nod slowly, not trusting myself to speak. I know he’s right, but all I can think about is Caleb. He’ll be wide awake by now, and wondering where I am.

“Please, Fiona,” Rider whispers, his voice cracking. “Please don’t put yourself in danger. Stay here where I can protect you. That’s the only reason I did this.”

Suddenly, I notice how close our faces are. My lips are inches from his, and there is barely any space between our bodies. His hands on my arms loosen again, his fingers sliding gently against my skin.

No.

Denying it doesn’t help. Desire ignites within, making my stomach twist as heat creeps through me, making my nipples hard as lust throbs between my legs.

“Is that really the only reason you mated me?” I ask, my voice harsh. I shove him away, forcing him to let go of me as I put some space between us.

He frowns. “Of course it is. Do you think I planned any of this?”

“Maybe!” I shout, crossing my arms. “I’ve kept out of all the pack business—I had no idea you were close to Silver Meadows. But maybe you’ve been watching me and planning this the whole time!”

“Fiona,” he sighs, shaking his head. “It was always in the back of my mind that you were in Silver Meadows, but I assumed you were out of the line of fire and safe with your family, exactly as you should be.”

The word “family” hits me like a blow. The only real family I have is Caleb, and now I don’t know if I’ll ever see him again.

Rider can’t know. I will never let him hurt my son the way he hurt me.

“Look,” Rider says, taking a few steps towards me, “we should talk. Why don’t you come over here and sit down with me?”

He puts one hand on my shoulder and gestures to the bed. Even though my body screams in response, begging for his touch, fear and pain crash through me, and they are far stronger than lust.

He’s just like the others. All he cares about is fucking me. No one in this pack has any honor at all.

“Don’t touch me!” I scream, recoiling from him. “There is nothing to talk about! You fucking kidnapped me, forced me into marriage, and now I’m your prisoner. How dare you try and justify this! Leave me alone!”

I shuffle away so fast, I trip over and slump to the floor, putting my face in my hands and letting the tears come. The exhaustion of the day, as well as all the pain I’ve been trying to hide, catches up to me. The strength bleeds out of my body, and I can’t stop trembling.

I miss you, Caleb. Oh, my boy, I miss you so much! Mommy didn’t leave you, I promise!

My sobs increase as tears pour down my cheeks. I’m afraid Rider will come after me again, but to my astonishment, he simply turns and strides out of the room.