Cursed by Darkness (Once Upon A Curse)

13. Juniper

THIRTEEN

Juniper

In the dead of night, Ronna lost her husband first. Not by the war. Not by another’s hands. It was illness and old age that took him. That was when the truth of her situation truly set in.

J uniper’s feet dragged as she made her way into the inn they had set up for people to rest. She could barely keep her eyes open. Looking for a clock, she wondered how close the sun was to rising. For hours, she had cleaned and wrapped wounds, helped set bones, and assisted people back to their homes. She wasn’t a healer by any means, but she could follow instructions and she was a quick learner.

Stepping close to the fire burning in the stone hearth, she stretched her aching back. The main floor of the inn had a dozen or so tables for meals and drinks, as well as settees and chairs around the warm open room. Most of those seats were occupied by those who’d been helping all night or those who had lost their homes in one way or another. Apparently, the Gilarnians had decided it wasn’t enough to just attack those in the streets. They’d looted places, smashed others. Fires had roared to life, but the villagers managed to put most out before more than a few homes were completely destroyed.

Many of the men and women in here now had their eyes shut, savoring this moment of quiet. Richard and a couple of Bodin’s guards were a few steps away, discussing next moves.

“Here, this will help,” the innkeeper said—an older woman with kind brown eyes and graying hair piled high upon her head—approaching with a steaming mug.

“Thank you.” Juniper took it and inhaled the rich, earthy aromas. Sipping at it, she let the cider warm her from the inside out.

“Your Majesty,” she said, but not to her. Juniper looked up to find Bodin joining them. “Can I get you anything?”

He shook his head with what Juniper knew was a rare smile. “No, thank you. I’m fine.”

She dipped into a low curtsy and left them alone. Juniper took another drink of the cider. A quiet moan slipped out, and Bodin tensed. She caught him, not for the first time, staring at her lips.

“Hasn’t anyone told you not to accept food or drinks from strangers?” her husband said in a soft voice as he inched closer.

Juniper stilled with her lips on the edge of the mug. She lowered it, her heart beginning to race.

“No, you’re fine,” Bodin added. “You can trust Francine, and most of the people here, but you need to be cautious. Especially with attacks getting closer like this.”

She nodded, feeling like a fool, and lowered her gaze. When his hand landed on her shoulder, she sighed with relief. She still wasn’t quite used to physical touch after spending so many years on her own, and Bodin touched a lot. It was like he was trying to find excuses to be close with how often he held her hand, put an arm around her, kissed her cheek or head. Juniper liked it far more than she should. She longed for those gestures, the soft brushes of his fingers against her skin. His arms encircling her, holding her to him.

He cut into her thoughts. “Come on, I’ll get a carriage to take you home.”

“I’m fine,” she said, lifting her chin.

He gave her a disbelieving look. “You look about ready to fall asleep standing up, June.”

She’d heard the nickname earlier and wondered if it had been a mistake. Now that it was clearly intentional, her heart pattered harder in her chest. Her brothers had called her Juni growing up—at least, Rafe and Hugo had. And on occasion, Delroy, but she rarely spoke to him. He was second-in-line to the throne after Rafe, but he didn’t care about any of that. As far as she knew, he spent most of his time training with the Forossan army and was rumored to be the best swordsman in the realm. Even Richard used Juni from time to time when it was just the two of them.

June , however, was different. It felt more mature. And it was all Bodin’s. No one else had ever used it.

She noticed the redness in his eyes, the pure exhaustion in his stance. “So do you.”

“I’m the king; I need to stay,” he said. “But you should go home and get some rest.”

“And I’m the queen. Together, remember?” She turned to set her mug on a nearby table then hooked an arm through his. “If you’re staying to help, so am I.”

Sighing, he shook his head. “You’re impossible.”

Juniper waited for him to make his decision. He clenched his jaw, and she smiled as he began leading her toward the door. She would take the victory where she could. Glancing back, she signaled to Richard that they were leaving. He followed them outside, where two other guards stood at attention.

They walked down the now-quiet street until Bodin spotted Laurent, who appeared just as tired as she felt.

“Are the perimeters secured?” Bodin asked by way of greeting.

“Yes. Everything is as you ordered. We’ll be alerted should they try again.”

“Good.”

Laurent ran a hand through his hair. “We didn’t have enough people on duty because we didn’t think they would make it this far to attack here. But with the added men from Forosse, they were able to act fairly quickly.”

“How far away is the valley?” Juniper asked, wondering how or why they came this far with so few numbers. What had they hoped to accomplish?

“Two or three days by horse.” Bodin used his free hand to cover the one Juniper had tucked in his elbow. To Laurent, he said, “We’re going home for a while to rest. You should do the same.”

His friend gave a soft chuckle. “She actually convinced you to leave?”

“It appears so.” Bodin met her gaze in the streetlight, but she couldn’t read his dark expression.

“You need sleep just as much as everyone else,” she said, not backing down. “You’ve been here all night. What good can you do if you work until you can’t keep your eyes open?”

“I knew I liked you,” Laurent said with a wink before adding, “Listen to her, Bo. She’s not wrong.”

As if on cue, the king yawned and nodded. “I know. Fine, we’re leaving. We’ll check in around lunchtime.”

Juniper waited until they were through the palace gates and relatively alone to whisper, “We?”

“Hmm?” Bodin shifted to put his arm around her waist, and she leaned into his side, grateful for the support. Her legs ached tremendously and threatened to quit holding her up any second.

“You said we’ll check in.” She rested her head on his shoulder as they made their way to the entrance. “Does that mean you’ll let me go with you instead of trying to distract me with magical portal lands?”

She said the last bit quiet enough not to be overheard. Since she’d started exploring them, she quickly realized they were truly a secret. And she had no intention of being the one to tell others about his power to create them.

“I don’t think I need to let you do anything,” he said, his voice full of amusement. “I think you’ll do whatever you want.”

Juniper relaxed at his tone. She’d heard stories growing up of men not liking headstrong women, and she’d always feared that even if she made it out of that tower and married, her husband wouldn’t allow such behavior. She feared he would try to stifle her. But Bodin wasn’t like that. In fact, he seemed to enjoy it.

For the first time in her life, Juniper felt as if she could be her truest self. She felt the sort of freedom she’d never expected, much less hoped for.

When Bodin released her and headed inside the palace, she tried not to show her disappointment to the guards and anyone else who might have seen them. She didn’t want to admit, even to herself, that she craved his touch. It scared her to think about how much it gave her a sense of security. It made her feel protected.

It made her feel loved. Even though she knew that wasn’t the case here, she could see that he at least cared for her a little bit.

Bodin paused just inside and seemed to consider something as she stopped next to him.

“I’d rather you be with me so I know you’re safe than sneaking around,” he said in a low tone as he laced their fingers between them. He did it slowly, with hesitation for once, as if worried about her reaction.

Her stomach fluttered, but she squeezed his palm gently and nodded. Despite how they were brought together, despite not wanting to marry this man, she couldn’t deny how right it felt to walk alongside him. How much she appreciated his trust and respect and friendship.

Because there was no doubt in her mind that Bodin was her friend at this point. She cared about him, his people. Their people. And he’d shared a massive secret with her.

Guilt coursed through her, but she shoved it down. When talking with him those first few nights, she’d shared a great deal about herself, but not everything. She’d mostly told him the basics, the watered-down version of her life. It was too soon to give it all, to tell him just how difficult the past had been, why it had been so rough. She wasn’t ready to talk about those things out loud just yet. Maybe one day…

Maybe one day, she would admit that she had been hurt by her father essentially selling her to a stranger. But that it had also excited her because it meant leaving that wretched life behind once and for all.

Maybe one day, she would admit that she’d planned to run away the night of the wedding. That she’d had enough and could no longer live this secretive life. Until Bodin pulled her aside and spoke to her, promised her freedom. Until his kindness convinced her to give this a chance, no matter how much it scared her. Because even if she ran away, she would still be alone. And she couldn’t stand the loneliness anymore.

One day, she would tell him the full story of why she was locked away all those years ago and why her family eventually distanced themselves.

She wanted to be honest with him, especially when he had shared so much of himself, but it also terrified her.