Daddy’s Mail Order Mate (Twilight Meadows Wolves #3)

Chapter 6 - Thorn

“Want some help, Thorn?”

I look to the nursery doorway to see my sister’s expectant face staring back at me. From the weariness around her eyes,

“I’m fine.”

I pluck out a wet wipe and continue changing Rowan.

“You really don’t seem like you’re fine.”

She gets a short grunt and brief glowering glance from me. But that just makes her roll her eyes and saunter in towards me, crossing her arms.

“I can change a diaper, Paige.”

“I know you can change a diaper,” she states as she leans on the wall next to me. “But do you want some help with Gwen?”

Rowan babbles softly and flashes me a drowsy smile when I finish putting on his fresh diaper. But while that warms my heart as it always does, it doesn’t dispel the knot of tension spooled up in my chest.

“What are you trying to get at now?”

“Well, since she’s still here… You two are sticking with the trial, right? Because it seemed pretty tense between you two last night. ”

My throat clenches and I force a dry swallow down; the words don’t come readily.

“She needs somewhere to stay.”

“You’re being more crabby than usual, and that’s saying something.”

I close up Rowan’s clothes and haul him up into my arms with the utmost tenderness.

“I convinced her to stay for the trial. Is that what you want to hear?”

There’s a curious twinkle in her eye as she steps in closer to me.

“And what about the rejection? I’ll forgive you for never telling me you had a mate bond with her if you tell me everything now.”

“It’s none of your business,” I assert with a growl to my voice. Rowan stirs in my arms and I immediately settle into shushing him.

“It’s exactly my business. Don’t forget who set you two up.”

I grumble wordlessly and idly rock in place to keep my son soothed.

“Don’t just grunt at me, Thorn. Seriously; what happened between you two? All I want to do is try and help you two work things out. And I know you do too! If you really didn’t want her to be here, she’d be gone by now. I know you better than anyone. So obviously, you want her to stay—which means you want her to be your mate again.”

I glare at her, and she puts her hands up in a defensive shrug.

“Okay, maybe I jumped the gun on the last part. But you can’t deny that you want her here.”

All the emotions that Gwen had woken back up from their hibernation crackle and choke inside of me. I can’t bear to look at her, or even be seen. Even though I know my face is perfectly stoic, trained and hardened by years of a hard life, Paige has always had the ability to pluck away at the loose threads of me if I let her.

So I couldn’t let her.

There was too much that she didn’t need to know or ever need to bear.

A cold discipline grits in me.

“I agreed to try this for you, and you made a match for me. But this is mine to handle.”

My sister sighs and paces across the room.

“If you won’t talk with me about it, let me try and help somehow. You know that we tacked visiting you onto the official pack plans to have a social event with Elm Wood. You said her brother was a recent recruit, right? Maybe she might feel a bit more comfortable being around him too. So maybe you all can come with us? And I could maybe get the chance to talk to her and help win her over for you. I mean, I got her here in the first place.”

My brow furrows.

Maybe. I know Gwen’s loath to have anything to do with packs, but maybe getting the chance to be around her brother could help. If nothing else, I can prove to him I don’t mean her any harm. And there’s the twitching worry in the back of my mind about something she’d said that first day.

This was her last attempt to be a wolf. I understand a reluctance to want to have anything to do with packs, but there’s more to her reluctance than what our shared history could make. What has happened to her that she is so alienated from our people?

Guilt cramps my throat.

I need to take accountability for this—because it has to have been because of me. The rejection had done more damage to her than I had thought. And maybe I could…

I close my eyes and grit out a tight sigh.

“I’ll ask her.”

Paige beams, brightening up the room. I give her a warning glance and a firm scowl.

“Don’t get too excited. And if she says no, don’t guilt her into going.”

“I would never!”

“You love to guilt me.”

She sticks out her tongue at me, just like when we were little kids. As fussy and bratty as she could be, I always felt a certain pride and affection that she’d felt confident to stand up to me. With how much abuse she’d suffered as a child, it had always been my duty as her brother to give her a safe space to act up and know that no matter what, she was safe with me.

“I do not.”

A coarse huff of amusement escapes me.

“You do.”

“If I loved to guilt you, would I go make everyone breakfast?”

“Yes.”

Paige pauses, expression clearly running the math on that. But then she just flashes me a bright smile and heads for the door.

“You better be an absolute gentleman when you ask her. And you better let me talk to her alone at some point.”

“If she wants to talk to you,” I counter firmly.

Only when she leaves the room do I look back down at the baby in my arms. He blinks up at me, happy and helpless.

This is all for him.

I lean down and press my forehead to his little head, close my eyes, and steady my resolve.

***

I glance back to my son in the rear view mirror by reflex, using the back seat baby mirror to get to see a glimpse of his smiling face even from the driver’s seat. But I don’t need to rely on it to know that he’s alright.

It still feels so uncanny to not only see someone else back there with him, but Gwen of all people. It’s an image so uncomfortably sharp in my heart that I’m glad I have to watch the road most of the time.

“... How’s he doing back there?”

“Just fine,” she answers softly. “How much longer? He could use a change before he gets fussy.”

“Not much longer. My house is close to this pack.”

I see the tension in her shoulders at that word: pack.

A seething urge pulses in me—who had made her so terrified of packs? It couldn’t have just been what happened between us.

If I ever got to find out who burned such fear into her, I would personally see to it that they suffered.

I shove back the vivid images of torture in my mind and focus on the road in front of me. We’re cruising along nicely with a pretty sizable caravan by this point, right on the tail of Paige and Liam’s car. The rest of the Portsmill Pack participating in this bond-building exercise are all loaded up in a few rugged trucks and SUVs. It takes a good bit of effort to keep my professional vigilance and skill sets with security at bay. This wasn’t a high risk VIP escort, so I don’t need to be glaring around every corner or be ready to twitch for the gun in my glove compartment.

And it really isn’t much longer. We crest the last little hill and pull up into the main lot nestled nicely along a variety of buildings and homes that served as the nucleus of the local pack.

There’s already a decently sizable crowd out to meet us from the look of things. I pull my car in to park alongside Paige’s with a spare glance back to Gwen. She looks like an animal in a trap, with the tension in her body. But when she locks eyes with me, that anxiety is obscured beneath a hardened gaze and lock of limbs.

“... We can turn back right now, if you’d like.”

But she just shakes her head and starts unbuckling Rowan.

“No. Besides, you need someone to watch the baby when you inevitably get busy around all those wolves.”

I frown but leave it there.

By the time we’re out of the car, Liam and Eli are both shaking hands and sharing a brief brotherly hug. Leading by example, I suppose. And I’m glad to not have to worry too much about their packs anymore. There was some measure of stability in this area now, though only time would tell if they’d both be able to properly secure their territory and authority in the long term.

The Lunas are far less ceremonious, practically squealing in delight as they hurry into a giddy embrace. I wouldn’t expect anything less from Quinn and Paige. They’re practically sisters. I suppose that sets a pretty decent precedent for the packs to like each other.

My attention flicks past them to the crowd. Portsmill members start loading out and Elm Wood folks mill in to greet familiar faces and to help guide them along to the facilities set up for them. The whole event was going to last a few days, but Gwen and I only saw fit to stay for part of it. Regardless of Gwen’s own stance, I’m not too keen on spending too much of my vital time at home needing to handle socializing with the local packs. I just want to take care of my son…

I look over to where Gwen is taking my son’s car seat out, and my eyes lock on how the sunlight catches the coppery curls that dust around her neck and jaw.

Then her gaze lifts with a sweep of lashes and once again, those soulful dark brown eyes meet mine.

… And I want to take care of her. To what degree I deserve to do so, after everything that happened to her because of me, because of how I failed her. Beneath the guilt of the man, my wolf growls and bristles, ready to defend its right and protect its own.

I grit my jaw and look away, though I move closer to take hold of the handle and nod a silent thanks to her.

“I can carry him,” she offers quietly.

I open my mouth to refuse, but then a voice catches me from behind.

“Gwen!!”

I force my face to be neutral as we turn towards her goliath of a brother walking towards us. Several of the other bachelors trail casually after him, and it takes all I have to not growl. There’s an edge of violence in my blood, a hypervigilance stirring; my wolf is far too aware that I don’t have a sense of security about Gwen, about the bond. And it is angry at the idea that some idle interloper could be anywhere close to her and either harm her or steal her away.

I find myself stepping closer to her, to the point that I can swear I feel the body heat radiating from her arm through my shirt. Even with that distracting me, I notice the glance she spares up at me. Part of me feels a strange harmony in that moment, but then her focus locks in on her brother as he closes the distance.

“Lucas. Wipe that grin off your face.”

Her brother tucks his smile a bit at her deadpan warning, but apparently can’t stop beaming.

“What’re you talking about?”

Gwen clicks her tongue; my heart clenches with nostalgia. She’d often done that when we were young.

“Don’t be a smartass, and don’t get ahead of yourself. I’m not joining your pack.”

“I know, I know. But can’t I just be happy my big sister’s finally visiting my new home?”

I see one of the young men’s eyes trail up Gwen’s willowy legs, and bite my tongue to stop the urge to warn him off in the way a wolf would: all teeth. He seems to catch himself when he notices me glaring down at him and awkwardly shuffles in place.

“Not if you’re going to be smug about it.”

“So uh, congratulations on the mate, Mister Vata, sir,” one of the other new recruits remarks with a sort of hopeful anxiety in his voice. My memory pulls up the dossier on him like clockwork: Xavier, young, recent recruit, observed to be relatively meek and well-meaning, with a tendency to gawk at me when I had to come here. Fine enough kid, but the innocent effort to try to talk to me is much more of a landmine than the poor boy realizes.

The three of us who know the truth tense up. Gwen and I share a look; even after all these years, I know that poker face well enough to sense the tension beneath. Her throat bobs subtly and for a microsecond, I can’t look anywhere else. Our faces turn back and I see Lucas’ eyes narrow at me with quiet wariness.

“Thank you,” I state with disciplined calm.

I hear Gwen’s breath hitch, and it sets off a tingling in my palms.

“Thorn,” she speaks up in a careful murmur, “Rowan still needs changed.”

That’s something I realize I missed with her. She didn’t spare needless energy with unnecessary questions or comments, and trusted me to understand and keep up with her wavelength.

“There’s a bathroom nearby.”

We both start to step away, with my first step guiding our direction in silent understanding. But just as we’re starting to disengage, there’s another voice hailing us.

“Thorn,” Eli calls out behind me. “Could I borrow you for a moment? There’s something I’d like to run by you.”

And I can tell from his perfectly measured tone that it’s sensitive business. Why else would he need to pull a council agent aside, after all?

Gwen looks up to me and nods. Just that silent gesture says so much: urging me to comply, affirming that she can handle Rowan, asking me to trust her with this…

My heart pangs.

I’ve missed this. I’ve missed the way we can understand each other without words.

I’ve missed her.

I swallow tightly and give a small nod back. Her eyes almost seem to glitter despite her tightly composed expression. But I can’t linger in this look or this moment. I turn towards Eli and resolve myself to trust in her to look after herself and my son, at least for a few minutes.

“Let’s go.”