The Dragon Queen (Death #4)

24. Calista

Chapter 24

Calista

Riviana returned to the Realm of Caelum through the doorway in the Great Tree. Queen Eldinar and my uncle silently excused themselves when Talon returned, understanding that Khazmuda and I were the ones who needed this moment most.

The three of sat together near the bonfire, the flames warm on an already warm evening full of fireflies and music. Riviana’s music was louder than it’d been in a long time, the tune ethereal, light, but still powerful.

Talon sat with his arm propped on his knee, holding my gaze for several minutes straight.

Khazmuda lay with his chin upon his claws, his eyes locked on Talon’s face as well.

I hadn’t looked away either, studying his face and memorizing it like I might lose it again. The weeks that passed had been so horrible that his return wasn’t enough to erase it. I still needed time to accept he was truly there with me. Tears left my eyes and slowly dripped down my cheeks, remembering the long journey home across the sea, the nights I’d slept alone in my tent, the times Queen Eldinar and others had tried to comfort me but failed.

Sadness would enter his gaze at the sight of me, but he didn’t try to comfort me. Hours were spent in silence as we sat together, all of us getting used to the time that had been stolen from us.

I had questions, but I was too scared to ask them.

It seemed like he didn’t want to talk either.

A reunion should be blissful and passionate, but we were both so broken in our own ways that we needed time to accept this was real. To accept that we’d really come back together.

Khazmuda was the first to speak, projecting his mind to both of us so we could both hear his thoughts. You should have told us.

Talon’s eyes dropped for the first time.

We could have helped you.

“I didn’t see how.”

You carried this secret for a long time. It must have eaten away at you.

“Yes,” Talon said quietly. “It did.”

I started to connect the clues from the past, to piece together a puzzle that hadn’t been solved. “You knew the whole time.” He’d said the battle would claim his life, because it would. He’d pushed me away to spare me. He’d told me he wanted to marry me, knowing he could never keep that promise.

Talon looked away in shame.

“In the castle at Shadow Stone….and in our quarters on the ship…I heard you speak to someone.” I’d assumed my interpretation of reality had been false because it didn’t make sense. Talon didn’t seem like the kind of man to talk to himself like that. But I never saw anyone in the room. “You weren’t speaking to ghosts. You were speaking to him.”

Talon didn’t lift his chin to look at me, his silence his confirmation. “He gave me the power to take back the Southern Isles—in return for my soul. I made the exchange when I had little to live for. When I wanted to be punished for the way I’d failed my family. But then I met you…” He lifted his gaze and looked at me. “And knew I’d made a grave mistake. I asked him to free me of the arrangement, but I couldn’t accept his terms.”

“You could have prevented all of this, and you said no?”

A hint of pain flooded his eyes. “It was a deal I couldn’t take.”

“I don’t think you understand how Khazmuda and I have suffered.” How neither one of us had wanted to live anymore.

He glanced down again. “Whatever you’ve suffered, I assure you my time in the underworld was far worse. A month passed in your time, but for me it was been two years. Two years of eternal night. Two years of taking souls from those who’d made similar deals. Two years of an existence that can’t be escaped—not even in death.”

Guilt flooded me when I realized my lack of sensitivity. “I’m sorry.”

What was the deal?

Talon rubbed his thumb and forefinger together as he kept his eyes down. “To capture Queen Eldinar and have her take my place.” He looked up to see my horrified expression. “Because her soul was the only one of greater value than mine. I couldn’t let her take my place, not when I made the deal and she didn’t. It was my burden to suffer—not hers.”

The resentment I felt disappeared.

“And after what she did for me, I’d say I made the right choice.”

I fell into heavy silence, thinking about all the invisible weight he carried that no one could see. Now I understood why he’d been distracted toward the end, why he didn’t really seem to be there anymore, why his love and affection had evaporated. “Will Bahamut retaliate?”

Talon held my stare. “I don’t know.”

He can’t take Talon’s soul as long as I live—so retaliation is pointless.

A new fear burned inside me. “Unless he comes back to kill you…and then take Talon.”

“As the God of the Dead, he can’t interfere with the living,” Talon said. “Khazmuda is safe.”

Then Bahamut is no more.

I studied Talon’s face, seeing if he felt the same way.

His face was like stone. The silence stretched, the sound of the crackling flames beside us.

“What was it like there…?” I asked the question with hesitation, unsure if I wanted to know the details of what he’d suffered for so long.

He looked at the ground for a while. “Unspeakable. And I’d rather it remain unspeakable—unless you really want to know.” He lifted his gaze and looked at me, the light out of his eyes.

Some things are better left unsaid.

“You said two years had passed.” Two years was far longer than we’d even known each other. “I can see that you’re different now, and that makes sense, given the amount of time you were there.”

He watched me, his arms on his knees, waiting for me to make my point.

“I…I didn’t think you were going to come back.” My eyes dropped because I couldn’t look at him as I said these words, as I revisited the tension that nearly broke me. “That must have been a hard decision for you to make.” His love for his wife had endured for decades, was so strong that he’d forfeited his soul to avenge her. After a two-year separation, I expected his love for her to burn, while his love for me would have faded.

Talon fell into a bout of silence that stretched on forever. His eyes moved elsewhere, in the distance with the fireflies, his eyes reflecting the glow of their illuminated bodies. “It was a decision I didn’t have to make, because she made it for me.” His eyes found their way back to me. “She said I belong to someone else now—and it’s time for us to let go.”

I felt my body rise with the deep breath I took, moved by her selflessness. When she’d realized I loved Talon, the hurt was in her eyes, the sting of pain she couldn’t hide. But then she buried it quickly, swallowed the disappointment, and accepted me. “I wouldn’t have blamed you if you’d chosen her. She’s the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen—on the inside as well as the outside.”

His eyes lowered, and a pained smile moved on to his lips. “She was an exceptional woman. She didn’t deserve what happened to her. And she didn’t deserve to hear her husband proclaim his love for someone else…and I’ll be forever grateful she spared me from that. That she loved me enough to let me go, to give me her blessing to love, to be at peace, to have children…when she never did.” The smile faded, and his eyes hardened in pain, glossed with tears. “I love you both more than words can say…but I need some time.”

“It’s okay,” I whispered, not wanting to let him go but knowing I had to.

We understand, Talon. Take all the time you need.

He sat there for another moment, his eyes on the ground, and then he stood up and walked away, his shoulders not strong like they were before, his cape trailing behind him across the grass…and then he disappeared into the sea of fireflies.