Eclipse Sector (V-Clan #3)

13. Ivana

CHAPTER THIRTEEN

IVANA

CHAPTER THIRTEEN: IVANA

I didn’t end up sleeping in the bathtub.

It was too uncomfortable, and the water wasn’t warm enough for living inside an igloo. I also didn’t want to drain whatever enchantment was used to heat up the interior.

Instead, I took over the entire bed, choosing to sleep sideways across the mattress.

I’d been childishly proud of myself until I woke up in a little corner of the bed with Cillian’s cologne suffocating my senses.

My gaze narrowed as I looked over my shoulder, but the Alpha in question was nowhere to be seen. Just like yesterday.

I reached for a clock on the nightstand and glared at the time. It was only five in the afternoon, which meant I’d slept a mere six hours. But hell if I could rest any longer. The sun would be setting right about now anyway.

Time for a run, I told my wolf.

Stripping out of my pajamas, I knelt on all fours and willed my animal to take control. The shift came over me in a rush of adrenaline, the hairs along my skin morphing into fur as my body changed shape.

A huff escaped my snout when the transition completed, causing me to giggle inside. My wolf loved her freedom and wasn’t pleased that I’d kept her locked up for the last few days.

Let’s go sightseeing , I murmured to her as we shadowed outside the igloo.

I’d seen enough of the town area to somewhat know my way around, but I’d yet to explore any sort of countryside.

Although, I doubted there was much to see other than snow and ice.

I shivered inside, not all that enthused by the lack of landscaping here. Better get used to it , I muttered to myself.

Because all the Omegas kept saying how Glacier Sector reminded them of home —a home I would be calling my own soon enough. With an Alpha mate.

That last thought had me swallowing with unease. Cillian’s kiss had been everything I’d ever dreamt of. At least until it’d ended and the words that had followed.

Still, it’d set an expectation I wasn’t sure the other eligible Alphas could meet.

None of them gave me butterflies the way Cillian did.

Why can’t I just get over this stupid crush on him? I wondered while my wolf sniffed around, searching for a field to run in. This is ridiculous. He doesn’t want me. He’s made that more than clear. I need to stop thinking about him. Craving him. Wanting him .

I growled, the sound one that had my wolf perking up with interest as she scanned the snowbank ahead of us.

Sorry, I murmured to her. I’m growling at Cillian, not at any sort of threat.

She couldn’t understand my words, but my tone placated her.

No danger, she’d basically translated. Safe to continue onward .

Our paws moved silently across the cold ground, leaving little imprints behind as we trekked along a flat stretch of land. My wolf kept glancing behind us and all around, vigilant and aware—like always.

The setting sun painted a pretty glow on the horizon, one that glittered off the icy earth.

I suppose that’s a pretty sight, I thought, admiring the colors. Although, Blood Sector has similar views during the winter.

A sigh built deep in my chest, my heart beating a slow, morose rhythm.

When I’d agreed to the mating program, I’d thought moving to Night Sector wouldn’t be bothersome at all. But I was beginning to realize that I hadn’t thoroughly considered what it meant to leave the land my wolf and I considered to be our home.

We can start fresh. Make new friends. It’s not like we have many in Blood Sector anyway .

Except it wasn’t just about friends .

It was about the environment. The trees. The lush volcanic sand. The way the grass feels against my paws.

My wolf grunted at that last part and kicked at the snow beneath us, clearly understanding my thought process. She wasn’t a huge fan of this environment either.

But maybe we can learn to love it, I said to her. Let’s… let’s just try…

She released another grunt—one that expressed doubt—and started forward at a trot.

The white blanket on the ground went on for miles. It wasn’t entirely flat, but the hills were covered in snow, too.

Perhaps summers are ? —

My wolf paused, the fur along the back of my neck dancing.

We’d been alone on our stroll. But now… There’s someone coming.

My animal’s pointy ears swiveled, our senses on high alert as my wolf slowly glanced to our left.

Oh, it’s you. I should have known he would interrupt my early evening adventure. What do you want, Cillian?

Unfortunately, my wolf’s reaction to seeing Cillian’s beast didn’t quite match the irritation underlining my tone.

Because she was practically salivating at the sight of his massive form, nearly twice the size of our own.

His beast prowled forward with a confidence that had my wolf’s tongue lolling from her mouth, her tail swishing in open delight.

Stop it, I demanded.

She didn’t.

Not that I was surprised. My wolf followed her mating instincts, which were all homed in on the approaching Alpha—the one she had considered to be hers for far too long.

Cillian and I had never actually spent time in animal form together. Oh, I’d seen his beast, but always from afar. And I doubted he’d ever actually observed me as my wolf.

Why would he? I thought darkly. I’m not in his league.

Do you think it’s wise to be wandering a foreign land alone, Ivana? Cillian asked, a chiding tone accompanying his words.

Wise? I repeated as my wolf cocked her head to the side. She’d picked up on his tone, too. And she wasn’t sure she liked it. I’m stretching my legs, Cillian. Going for a run. Surely you understand that as a fellow shifter?

You’re a guest here, Ivana. An unmated Omega, he said slowly, his words grating on my nerves. Because what the fuck did that have to do with anything?

I’m fully aware of my mating status, I growled back at him. But thanks for the reminder.

You’re missing the point.

My animal huffed at his voice while I muttered, Clearly. Because why should it matter? We’re in a V-Clan sector. I’m safe here.

Are you? he countered, his animal circling mine. Out here? In the open air where anyone could drop in and snatch you away?

My wolf and I snorted at him. Who would possibly want to snatch me away, Cillian?

His beast paused right in front of me. Were you this confident when you ended up in that hole?

Had I been in human form, my mouth would have dropped open at the cold reminder of how we’d met. You’re going to bring that up? Now? Here?

I’m making a point.

And what point is that? I demanded. That you’re an asshole?

A low rumble of sound left his beast, one that usually would have had my own animal taking a step back. But my wolf and I had never feared Cillian.

I’m pointing out that being in V-Clan territory does not mean you’re safe, he snapped into my mind . Why do you think I had to accompany all of you here? To protect you. This place is an unknown. Fuck, this entire experiment is an unknown.

My wolf gritted her teeth, her tail no longer swishing. Not only did she not appreciate his tone, but she also wasn’t a fan of his Alpha posturing.

You’re an Omega, Ivana. Vulnerable. Small. Easy to catch. And this world is dangerous, he went on. I would think you, of all Omegas, would know that.

I can take care of myself, I bit back at him, irritated by his belittling statements.

Vulnerable.

Small.

Easy to catch.

Fuck. That.

His wolf released another rumble, the growl seeming to reverberate through the telepathic link he’d established with my mind as he uttered two words— Prove it.

What?

You heard me, Vana. You think you’re safe out here? That you can take care of yourself? Then prove it. Show me what you can do. Show me how you would defend yourself against an Alpha. Fight me.

Had I been in human form, I might have laughed.

But I could hear how serious he was, could see it echoed in his wolf’s stance.

No, I told him. I’m not going to fight you.

Because you know you’ll lose.

Because that’s not what I would do if an Alpha tried to attack me, or snatch me, as you said. My wolf released a huff of agreement. Or perhaps she was reacting to his nearness and the intimidating wave of energy swirling around him.

She was not impressed.

And neither was I.

I know better than to fight an Alpha in wolf form, Cillian. I would shadow somewhere and find a weapon to use—from a distance.

His beast started prowling around me again, that energy intensifying and causing my animal to whine in response. She didn’t like the oppressive feel of his aura against ours, his presence no longer a welcome warmth, but a chilling caress.

What happens when you can’t shadow, Omega? he asked me, his mental voice taking on a dark tone. Will you end up in a hole again? Used and abused and waiting for someone like me to rescue you?

I flinched inside, his words lashing against my heart and unleashing a myriad of memories. Of a time when I should have been safe. Of a time when I’d naively trusted those who’d been meant to protect me. Of a time when I ended up in the ground, unable to move. Unable to shadow. Unable to scream .

My wolf shuddered as well, no doubt feeling the haunting nightmare of our past creeping across my consciousness.

Or she was responding to the repressive energy weighing down on her being, demanding that she kneel .

Cillian…

If you wanted to go for a run, perhaps you should have mentioned it to Ransom. Asked him for an outdoor date instead of a movie date. He resumed his pacing, his power pressing down on me even more as he moved. Or maybe you could have waited to ask Cael to escort you.

My wolf’s jaw clenched, her legs nearly giving out beneath the onslaught of his Alpha prowess.

He was making a point. Pushing my animal into the ground with mere thoughts rather than brute strength. He wanted me to feel his power. To scare me. To… to point out what an Alpha could do to me.

But I knew that better than most.

I was fully aware of the brute strength his kind possessed.

I’d just never expected Cillian to use it against me.

Especially after what I’d been through, how he’d found me, what he’d seen .

Running without a proper guardian is foolish and unsafe, he went on, seemingly oblivious to the turmoil he’d stirred inside my mind, the pain gouging at my heart.

This was the Alpha my wolf had chosen for herself. The Alpha she’d trusted.

But now… now he was using his power against us. Sharpening his energy like a weapon and making us hurt .

All while throttling my ability to shadow , I realized, his earlier question finally registering.

What happens when you can’t shadow, Omega? he’d asked. Will you end up in a hole again? Used and abused and waiting for someone like me to rescue you?

I shivered inside, the reality of being grounded forcing my mind to push inward to a place I feared. A place I hadn’t visited in six very long years. A place I’d created when my father had wrapped me up in an invisible noose and forced me to live in that hole .

Cold.

Alone.

Waiting for my betrothed .

A monster my father had sold me to.

A Gold Sector Alpha.

My wolf snarled, her instincts firing as she felt me retreat within our mind. She didn’t want me to hide. She wanted me to fight .

Cillian had been talking, saying something via the telepathic link he’d established, but I hadn’t heard a word of it.

I’d… shut him out. Wandered into that empty space inside my head, a place I’d resided in for what had felt like months while being trapped inside the ground, unable to move. Strapped down by an Alpha’s mental restraints.

Just like now.

With an Alpha I thought I could trust .

And all for what? Going on an evening jog as a wolf?

Cillian had wanted to prove a point—that I wasn’t safe here.

Congratulations. I believe you, I thought, not caring at all if he could hear me or not. The only one I can trust to protect me is myself .

Yet I couldn’t shadow. He’d lassoed me with his strength, ensuring I was trapped before him.

Oh, my paws could move. But what would he do if I ran? Flatten me to the ground like my brother and father had? Force me to obey? Truly make me kneel?

Are you even listening to me? Cillian demanded, his words piercing through the fog of my thoughts.

No , I replied, both in answer to his question and in response to his dominant air. No . I would not be tied down again. I was a free Omega now, allowed to make my own decisions.

But not free to shadow, apparently , I growled to myself. Likely not free to run, either. Because it’s not safe here. And Cillian, the Alpha I thought would always protect me, just proved that he can’t be trusted .

Throttling my ability to shadow.

Chastising me.

Kissing me out of pity.

Sharing an igloo with one fucking bed.

Saying I wasn’t in his league.

Rejecting me.

It… it was all too fucking much. I’d spent years pining for this Alpha, wanting to be his mate, thinking he was just playing hard to get.

But now…

Now I understand who you are, I muttered, my wolf’s gaze meeting his dark orbs. And I won’t fucking bow.

Vana… The nickname trailed off in my mind, his voice a mere whisper, one I shoved from my head before he could finish whatever profound statement or threat he’d intended to make.

Because I was done.

Done being rejected.

Done with his pity.

Done with being grounded by his power.

Done. With. Him.

My animal roared as I screamed inside my mind, needing to be free . Free of the burden of his presence. Free of this obsession. Free of this childish crush. Free of his oppressive energy.

Free. Of. Him.

“Ivana,” he said, having shifted back into his human form.

I didn’t even care that he was standing before me. Didn’t care that he’d shifted in the blink of an eye. Didn’t care that he was fucking naked.

Didn’t care at all.

Because I wanted nothing to do with him.

Not anymore.

We’re done.

I shadowed myself back to the igloo and directly into the shower, my wolf instantly giving me my body back. I wasn’t sure if Cillian had released me from his oppressive energy or if I’d somehow fought him off.

It didn’t matter.

I was alone.

And all I wanted to do… was cry.

I flipped the water on and lay on the heated tile floor.

It wouldn’t stay warm for long, but I probably wouldn’t even notice.

Because all I felt inside was ice.

Might as well freeze on the outside, too.