Feathers and Thorne Series Books 1 - 3: The Complete Collection

Chapter Twenty-Nine

Carter

I pull out the chair opposite him and drum my fingers against the table. “I don’t have a lot of time.”

Daniel takes a sip of his coffee and grimaces. “I understand. I don’t know how you’ve been living off this shit. It’s terrible.”

“It’s a hospital cafeteria,” I point out, my eyebrow climbing up. “I’m sure you didn’t call me so we can compare notes about the coffee.”

“You said you wanted to talk.”

“I did.”

Daniel sets his coffee down and links his fingers together. “Tristan and I have been keeping an eye on things. Remy isn’t a problem anymore.”

“Good.”

Daniel clears his throat. “As for the rest of them, they got the message, and as of an hour ago, the truce has been signed.”

It feels like the breath has been knocked out of me. After months of chasing them down, I can’t believe it is finally here.

Is this the beginning I’ve been waiting for? Or an end to something great?

I sit up straighter. “All that’s left is for the two of us to come to an agreement about the handover of power.”

Daniel curls his fingers around the mug. “Our previous terms stand. I assume you’ve chosen Tristan as my alternative?”

“Tristan has other plans for himself. Paul is going to be taking his place.”

Daniel blinks in surprise. “You want Paul to be my right-hand man?”

I nod. “And you need to keep Ernesto and Lorenzo close, too.”

Daniel gives me a slow nod. “Fair enough.”

“Do all the previous terms apply?”

Daniel exhales, and his eyes dart around the half-empty cafeteria, taking in the small tables with wooden chairs pulled up and the steady stream of medical staff coming in and out of the revolving doors. Out of the corner of my eye, I spot a flash of movement, and when I turn to it, I recognize the blonde-haired intern from Isabella’s first day.

She’s steered clear of the two of us since.

I’ve even heard whispers of a transfer, and while a part of me knows it wasn’t fair to blame her, the other part of me can’t deny how relieved I feel. Dr. Mullins, on the other hand, isn’t too pleased with me. However, given my outbursts and social standing, he’s reluctantly agreed to only allow experienced doctors and nurses near Isabella and our daughter.

It’s an agreement that suits all parties involved, and it keeps the hospital from having a problem on its hands.

Thank fucking God for Tristan and his quick thinking.

If it weren’t for him and Anita, I’d have been banned from the hospital for good, and I’d be pacing outside, feeling the guilt and shame eat away at my insides. Not being able to do anything for my family hasn’t been easy, but the past two weeks have given me a lot of time to think about the kind of life I want to build for myself and for them.

It all rests on Isabella’s shoulders. I’m equal parts eager and terrified to hear what she’s going to do.

“You’re still a part of the family, Carter. Not being head of the family won’t change that. You, Isabella, and your daughter will be offered the same perks and the same level of protection as you are right now.”

“And what if we have any more kids?” I swing my gaze back to Daniel’s and fold my arms over my chest. “I want to be sure all of my family is cared for. No matter the size.”

Daniel gives me the barest hint of a smile. “I can respect that. No matter the size. You have my word.”

“I’m going to need more than your word.”

“We can draft up a contract, and we can include the terms of your employment.”

“Employment?”

Daniel picks up his coffee and takes a long sip. “I assume you’ll be wanting a job as well, or are you going to try your luck somewhere else?”

Smug bastard.

He knows I don’t have the skills or credentials to be hired anywhere else.

“It won’t be something that’ll violate your promise to Isabella,” Daniel adds a little too quickly. “I have no interest in helping you defy that, so you don’t have to worry on that front. There’s going to be a few changes once I take over.”

“Such as?”

“Less violence for starters,” Daniel tells me, his eyes never leaving my face. “I know that you worked hard to build the empire, and I’m not going to undermine any of that, but if it has any hope of survival, things need to be done differently.”

Something hard and heavy settles in the center of my stomach. “I agree.”

Even if I don’t like it.

Daniel downs the rest of his coffee and stands up. “I’ll bring you the paperwork once it’s ready.”

I push my chair back with a screech. “There is going to be a clause in there that says that if you violate the terms of our agreement, you won’t be allowed to set foot in the city again.”

Daniel’s expression doesn’t change as he holds my gaze. “I expect nothing less.”

A heartbeat later, he picks up his empty coffee cup and walks away without a backward glance. In the doorway to the cafeteria, he pauses to throw it away and glances at me over his shoulder. When he’s gone, Tristan appears, one hand shoved into his pocket and a furrow appearing between his brows.

“Everything okay?”

I start walking in the direction of the door. “Yes. Are Paul and Ernesto watching the baby?”

“They take shifts,” Tristan replies, matching his pace to mine. “How did it go?”

“Paul will be his right-hand man,” I respond without looking at him. “There’s going to be a lot of changes.”

Tristan doesn’t say anything as he pushes the door open. In the elevator, I feel his gaze on me, but I don’t say anything. Instead, I take out my phone and aimlessly scroll through it. While I already had a feeling that Daniel was going to do things differently, considering how he does things in Hong Kong, I still can’t stop thinking about the future.

Or worrying about the future of the empire and my family by extension.

The elevator doors ping open, and Tristan and I get off and make a beeline for Isabella’s room. She is sitting up in bed with our daughter in her arms and a serene smile on her face. Sam is on one side of the bed, admiring the baby, and Anita is tucking the bed sheets in. When I walk in, Anita is still tidying up the room, and Sam is cooing over the baby.

Our daughter has never looked better.

In silence, they all leave the room, leaving Isabella and I alone with our daughter. Slowly, I pull a chair out and sit down. Then I lean forward and cover both Isabella’s hands with mine. She glances up, but her smile fades when she looks at me.

“What’s wrong?”

“I had a chat with Daniel.”

Isabella shifts the baby from one side to the other. “About the handover or the truce?”

“Both.” I cup the back of my daughter’s head and press a feather-light kiss to her cheek. “The truce has been signed. It’s over.”

Isabella releases a deep and shaky breath. “I can’t believe it’s finally done. Was it a lot of hard work?”

“Not with Remy Donahue out of the picture.”

Isabella clears her throat. “And the rest?”

“They’ve all fallen into line and seen the benefits of allying themselves with me,” I reply after a brief pause. “I want to hold her.”

Carefully, Isabella hands our daughter over, pausing to adjust the blanket wrapped around our little bundle. As soon as she’s in my arms and I’m looking down at her face, my chest tightens. Something warm and pleasant unfurls in the center of my chest as she stirs and makes a soft, breathy sound.

“Daniel and I talked about the takeover,” I murmur in a voice barely above a whisper. “We’ll go over everything after we leave the hospital.”

Isabella links her fingers together. “How do you feel about all of this?”

I clutch our daughter closer and press my forehead to hers.

“Relieved,” I reply after what feels like forever. “A little sad.”

***

Isabella

I ignore the knots in my stomach. “Do you regret any of it?”

Carter lifts his gaze to mine, and the fierce look on his face takes my breath away. “Not even for a minute. You and our daughter are worth it. You’re worth every sacrifice and everything I’ve been through to get here.”

I lean forward and look down at her sleeping and angelic form. “She’s perfect, isn’t she?”

“She is. You were right, dove. You were right to push me to do better for her and for you. You were fucking right all along.”

I look up at Carter, whose eyes are glistening with tears. “I’m proud of you, Carter. I know it can’t have been easy for you to walk away, especially after how much energy and effort you put into everything.”

Carter’s free hand darts out, and he takes my hand in his. “I made the right decision.”

Not only had he walked away in the middle of a negotiation, where he was being pummeled to death, but he’s also agreed to the biggest deal of his life. I know that Carter is still processing everything in that quiet, reserved way of his, but I’m also relieved he came to me after.

The old Carter would’ve gone out to find other ways to process his feelings. And I would’ve been left here, wondering which version of him I was going to get.

For the first time since returning to me, Carter seems at peace, and everything from the relaxed set of his shoulders to the tender way he’s holding our daughter makes me feel hopeful. I feel better about the future than I have in a long time.

Quietly, Carter hands me the baby back and stands up. He clasps his hands behind his back, and his expression turns solemn. “I need to talk to you about something.”

“Let me put her down.” I lean sideways and gently set her down in the crib. Then I look back up at Carter, who is eyeing both of us carefully like he’s trying to drink everything in without missing it. “What’s wrong?”

“I had a lot of time to think when you were… asleep.” Carter sits back down and takes both of my hands in his. “And before that, too. I’ve had a lot of time in general, and I thought about everything you said.”

My stomach clenches. “You make it sound like a bad thing.”

Carter’s lips lift into the ghost of a smile. “It’s not… unless it is. I’m not sure.”

I swallow past the lump in my throat. “Okay, you’re scaring me a little. What’s going on?”

“Walking away from the empire wasn’t as hard as I thought it was going to be. Well, once I was able to convince myself it was for the best, that is.”

I squeeze his hand. “I know it wasn’t easy. I really appreciate it.”

Carter sits up straighter and squares his shoulders. “But it’s not going to be enough. Not being the head of the empire doesn’t change who I am, and it isn’t a magical fix for my demons or the monster inside of me.”

I frown. “I don’t understand.”

Carter releases my hands, stands up, and blows out a breath. “There’s always going to be this darkness inside of me, this monster that thrives on chaos and destruction. I thought that walking away would end him, but it hasn’t. I don’t know if anything will.”

I link my fingers together to stop the tremor, but it’s too late. Carter has already seen it, and I know what he’s thinking. But I’ve never doubted my safety around him, and I don’t think he’ll hurt our daughter.

Carter’s darkness isn’t aimed at the people he loves, only at anything that threatens his family or his empire, and I understand that.

I’ve known that about him since the first day we met. And all I want is for Carter to keep his monster on a shorter leash.

It’s a small consolation to know he is working on it, but he’s right to worry about whatever is festering inside of him and how it can manifest in other ways. I glance over at our daughter, and I frown as a million possibilities race through my mind.

Including the kind of danger she’d be in if Carter’s monster got off his leash and went off in search of blood.

“When you left… after Rich tried to take you away… you told me that you were thinking of leaving me and raising our daughter on your own to provide her with a good life away from everything.”

I frown. “Yes, but I couldn’t leave you, Carter. I won’t.”

Carter runs a hand over his face. “What if I ask you to?”

I gasp, panic quickly rising. “I don’t understand.”

“What if I ask you to leave? What if I tell you that when you and the baby have been discharged, I’ll have Tristan drive you anywhere you want?”

My chest feels tight, and it feels like I can’t breathe.

“W-wait. Why do you want to send me away? I already told you that I’ve seen the change you’re capable of, Carter. I believe you.”

Carter’s expression softens as he sits back down. “I know you do, and I’m glad, but I don’t believe myself. I don’t trust myself. There’s always going to be this thing inside of me, and if I ever put you in danger again, or if it ever endangers our daughter’s life… I’d never be able to forgive myself.”

I bow my head to hide my tears. “I don’t want to leave.”

“You wouldn’t have to worry about anything. Neither you nor our daughter will want or need for anything. I’ll set up a bank account for you and a trust fund for our daughter.”

I glance up sharply. “You’re making it sound like I’m already out the door.”

Carter cups my face in his hands and holds my gaze. “You should be because I’ve finally realized that I can’t protect you from all of it, or any of it, actually. I can’t do a fucking thing except step away and hope the target on our back gets smaller, but I don’t know if it’s too late.”

Tears continue to spill out of my eyes. “So, you think the solution is to send me away? So your daughter and I can live in exile away from you? Don’t you want to be a part of her life?”

A part of me knows why he’s doing this.

Carter has had a revelation, an epiphany that’s making him realize what’s truly important in life, but as much as I don’t want our daughter to be collateral damage, I can’t let him do this.

I won’t. She deserves to have a father in her life, and he deserves the chance to try.

Carter is becoming the man I’ve always hoped he would be, at long last, and I know that walking away from him is only going to ruin that.

Carter grips the back of my neck and presses our foreheads together. “You have no idea how fucking hard this is. Of course, I want to be a part of her life and yours, but I’m trying to do the right thing here. I don’t know how to be selfless… I’ve never known how, but you taught me how. You and our daughter deserve a good life, and if you want it to be far away from me, I’ll find a way to make my peace with it.”

I wind my fingers through Carter’s hair and exhale. “And if I don’t? I’ve seen how hard you’ve been trying, Carter, and how much work you’ve put in to become a better man. I’d be crazy to walk away now.”

“Or sane.”

I shake my head furiously. “We aren’t going anywhere. I want us to be a family, that is if you still want to be.”

Carter crushes his lips to mine. “I want to have everything and more with you.”

My head is spinning as I grip the back of his neck.

Before I can angle my head to deepen the kiss, the baby cries. Reluctantly, Carter pulls away and releases me. He picks her up, and my head is still swimming as I watch them through hooded eyes. Then I smile and let my hands fall to my sides.

“Let’s get married.”

Carter has her pressed to his chest and is swinging her back and forth. “I already proposed to you, dove. Or was it that forgettable?”

“I mean, let’s get married right now,” I tell him, my lips spreading into a smile. “I don’t want to wait anymore.”

Carter is still rocking the baby. “I thought you wanted a destination wedding somewhere on the beach.”

“We can have all of that later, but I don’t want to wait one more second to be your wife.”

Or to start our life together. We’ve waited long enough.

Slowly, Carter sets the baby back down in her crib, and with a lot of tenderness, he tucks her in. Then he holds his hand out to help me up. Once I’m on my feet, he sweeps me into his arms and holds me close enough for me to feel the hammering of his heart through his clothes. With an exhale, he cups the back of my neck and murmurs something unintelligible under his breath.

“So, is that a yes?”

Carter pulls back to look at me and kisses me soundly.

Neither of us pulls back until the need for air becomes too great, and I find myself leaning against him for support. Carter gives me another searing kiss, the kind that makes my toes curl and my heart swell to twice its size. Then he laces his fingers through mine and pulls me behind him. When he sticks his head out of the room, his eyes are darting down both sides of the hallway. I peek out, but my brows furrow together when I don’t see anything special.

“What are you doing?”

“Ernesto and Paul are supposed to be nearby,” Carter replies without looking at me. “I need them to find Tristan, Sam, Anita, and a minister.”

“A minister? Does that mean you’re on board?”

“I’ve been wanting to marry you for months,” Carter responds, flashing me a quick smile. “Now, if I can just find out where everyone went…”

I tug on Carter’s hand and pull him back in. “We could just use our phones.”

Carter uses his free hand to pull his phone out of his pocket. Pressing it to his ear, he barks out a few things in rapid-fire tones, and I use the opportunity to drink him in. Every last inch of him, even the stubble peppered across his jaw and neck, is beautiful.

This is the best I’ve felt in a long, long time. And I can’t wait to call him my husband.

A short while later, Anita and Sam descend upon us, carrying two bags each. Anita sits by the baby, cooing and murmuring while Sam pushes me into the bathroom. There, she takes a veil and tiara out of one of the bags. She helps me into a short white dress with rhinestones in the center, frowning a little at the hemline. After running a comb through my hair, she places the tiara in the center and artfully arranges the veil around my face.

“Where did you find all these things on such short notice?”

“There are a few shops nearby. It seems you two aren’t the only ones to figure out you couldn’t wait to get married.” Sam gives a slight shake of her head and pushes me onto the chair in front of the mirror. “Now, I don’t have much to work with, but I’ll do my best.”

I squeeze Sam’s hand. “This is a good thing.”

“As long as we still get to have a wedding party later,” Sam teases, her lips spreading into a slow smile. “All that matters is that you and Carter are happy. You have each other, and you have your daughter.”

“And we have you guys,” I remind her with a smile. “We’ve gotten pretty lucky.”

Sam nods, and her eyes fill with tears. “Absolutely. Now, don’t go all getting sentimental on me, or you’ll make me cry.”

I release her hand and sit up straighter, watching in the mirror as she fiddles with my hair. When she takes the makeup out of the bag, I pull a face at her. Undeterred, Sam holds me still as she applies a light coat of mascara and some concealer and finishes the look off with some dark lipstick, blush, and shimmery eye shadow. As soon as she’s done, she gestures in the mirror, and I blink at the final look.

I don’t look like I’ve been in the hospital for a week. Hell, I don’t even look like I’ve just given birth.

Instead, the smokey-eyed woman in the mirror looks alluring and beautiful, and it’s exactly what I hoped for. Grinning, I pull Sam to me, ignoring her muffled protests the entire time. When I pull back, Sam pulls me back so I can give myself a once-over in the mirror.

“You’re getting married.” Sam squeezes my waist and dabs at her eyes. “I’m sorry. I told myself I wouldn’t cry.”

“It’s an emotional time.”

“You’re damn right it is. But after everything you two have been through, I’m just glad you made it here.”

I nod and swallow past the lump in my throat. “Me too.”

“Okay, let’s go back outside and wait for the minister.” Sam fluffs up her hair in the mirror and straightens her back. “You ready?”

“You’re still going to be my maid of honor, right?”

Sam takes my hand in hers and squeezes it. “I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

Arm in arm and giggling like a pair of schoolgirls, the two of us make it back into the room. Anita has the baby in her arms, and she’s singing to her in Italian. Ernesto and Lorenzo are standing in the doorway, peering out into the hallway. Tristan is standing in front of Carter, helping him adjust his tie. Slowly, Carter spins around to face me, wearing a black tux that is a size too big, but he still looks as handsome as ever.

And he takes my breath away, as he usually does.

Sam leads me to him, and I feel like I’m floating on a cloud.

I’m weightless and untethered until Sam unloops her arm and takes a step back. Carter takes my hands in his and draws me closer to him. “You look beautiful.”

I look into his eyes and smile. “You don’t look so bad yourself.”

Carter chuckles. “It’s the best Tristan could do on short notice.”

I let my eyes fall over him, taking in the dark suit, and I linger on his shoes. “You could probably fit another person in there.”

Carter’s smile turns wicked. “Are you offering?”

I shove his arm away. “That’s not how two people are supposed to get married. Where is Paul, by the way?”

“He’s trying to find a minister.” Carter straightens his back and checks his watch. “Maybe I should send Tristan to find him.”

I lace my fingers through Carter’s and squeeze. “We’ve got time.”

Carter looks back at me, and his expression turns serious. “Last chance to back out.”

“Not a chance in the world.”

Carter gives me a sweet kiss. “Good.”

Before he can kiss me again, someone clears their throat. Together, we spin around to find Paul in the doorway, sweat shining on his forehead, and a sandy-haired priest next to him, a Bible clutched to his chest. The priest pushes his glasses up his nose and stumbles forward, making apologies as he does. He stands near the window, in full view of the rest of the floor, and clears his throat.

“When we’re all ready, we can begin.”

Carter gives everyone in the room a pointed look. Anita sets the baby down in her crib and stands up, pausing to smooth out the folds of her dress. Then she goes to stand next to Sam, who gives my free hand a squeeze on her way past. Tristan, Ernesto, and Paul squeeze in next to Carter, wearing identical sheepish expressions.

The priest stands up straighter and clears his throat. “Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today in the presence of God and all these people to celebrate the love between…”

“Isabella Julis and Carter Blackthorne,” Tristan offers, with a quick wink in Sam’s direction.

“Isabella Julis and Carter Blackthorne. These two wish to honor and love one another and be joined together in holy matrimony.” He gestures to the two of us, and Carter shifts so he’s looking directly at me. My heart is hammering unsteadily the entire time. I tune out the rest of the priest’s monotonous voice until Carter holds his hand out, and Tristan hands him two ring boxes.

He takes mine out and looks into my eyes. “All my life, I’ve always felt like something was missing. When the Blackthornes adopted me, I felt less alone, like I’d finally found a place in the world, but it wasn’t until I met you that I realized what I’d been missing all along. A home. A warm and safe space to land, no matter what. You’ve given me all that and more, and I’m going to spend the rest of my life trying to make you as happy as you make me.”

Tears fill my eyes, and I blink them back.

“I promise to love, cherish, honor, and protect you, and I promise to be a good father to our daughter and to protect you both, come what may.” Carter is still looking into my eyes, but his voice catches a little toward the end. He pauses to clear his throat. “I love you so fucking much, dove.”

The priest coughs. “Isabella, would you like to say a few words?”

“When my dad got sick, I thought I was never going to be happy again. I spent my days barely surviving and floating from one day to the next, praying for a miracle. It wasn’t until I met you that I realized I was finally getting what I hoped for. You’ve opened up my eyes to what life can be like, and you’ve given me the most precious gift of all… a way back to myself. When I see myself through your eyes, I feel strong and confident and beautiful.”

Carter swallows and says nothing.

“You make me feel most like myself,” I continue in a softer voice. “And I will love you until the end of our days. I can’t wait to raise our daughter with you, Carter. And whatever life has in store for us, whatever we have to face next, I know we’re going to be okay as long as we have each other.”

“By the power vested in me by the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit, I now pronounce you man and wife.” The priest makes a gesture with his hands and takes a step back. “You may now kiss the bride.”

“Fucking finally.” Carter pulls me into his arms and dips me back. When our lips touch, stars explode behind my eyes, and I can’t breathe. Everyone in the room cheers, but I’m only vaguely aware of them. Carter sets me back on my feet, and I’m still breathless when we begin to sway.

Little by little, after a chorus of congratulations, everyone trickles out of the room.

Carter and I continue to sway to music only we can hear until my feet begin to ache. Wordlessly, Carter sweeps me into his arms and carries me over to the bed. After setting me down, he pulls the covers back and climbs in, tucking me into his side. With a sigh, I place my hand over his chest and admire the way my ring catches the light.

“So, how does it feel?”

“Surreal,” I whisper, with a quick look at our sleeping daughter. “I was thinking of Julis-Blackthorne as my last name.”

Carter squeezes my shoulders. “You can do whatever the fuck you want, dove.”

“We can do whatever the fuck we want,” I remind him, pausing to tilt my head back to look up at him. “I wish the doctor didn’t say that we have to wait a few weeks for the stitches to be removed. I miss you.”

Carter presses his mouth to my ear. “It’ll be worth it when the stitches come out, I promise.”

I shiver and press him tighter. “I’ll hold you to that, husband.”

Carter chuckles and glances over at our daughter. “Have you given the name any more thought?”

I nod and snuggle into his side. “Hope. Hope Julis-Blackthorne. I don’t know about the middle name yet… I don’t want to offend anyone.”

“We can always make them compete for it,” Carter teases, with a quick kiss on my cheek. “Think of how much fun it’ll be.”

I giggle and squeeze my eyes shut.

When I fall asleep in Carter’s arms, it feels like nothing in the world can pierce our little bubble. Because our happiness is long overdue and hard-earned.

And no one will ever take it away from us again.

* * *