First Street Heat (Beastverse #1)

2. Lilah

2

Lilah

I last fifteen minutes after I get back from testing before I'm back in bed, an ice pack wrapped around my abdomen, and my cursor hovering over the video link.

I should click it. Once I click it, the video will autoplay, and I'll be hooked. Worst case scenario: I watch the video and decide I can't handle a beast. I can change my appointment easily enough. Probably. I mean, I'll just be asking for a medically induced coma if I do. It's not like I'll bother any alphas by taking it back.

A part of me wonders if this clinic sent me beast porn. It said I should become acquainted with beast mating habits, and that seems like a fancy way of saying porn to me. I can't imagine it's porn, though. Everything else about the clinic seemed professional, so I don't think they're just willy-nilly emailing porn to their patients.

I sigh in frustration because the idea of watching beast porn right now is actually really hot. I'd like to blame the hotness of it on my heat, but I'd be watching it anyway the next time I got my toys out to artificially ease the ache of my biology.

Fuck it, I click on the hyperlink, and a webpage slowly starts loading. It only takes a couple of seconds, but those seconds have me pausing the video before it even fully fades in. My heart is threatening to beat out of my chest, and I don't know if it's because of the heat coming on or just because I'm that anxious to see what's in the video.

I click play quickly and hide my hand back underneath the blankets so I'm not tempted to pause it again.

"Okay, just say your name, who you are, and why you're here," a deep voice says behind the camera. More heat coils in my core, and I wonder if I'm actually going to get off while this man narrates some weird alpha beast stuff.

"This is weird, Scott." A tanned woman with dark hair and a killer body sits in a chair with her legs crossed, staring at the camera.

Scott, that was the name of the alpha I chose, right?

"The clinic needs an informational video for omegas that want to be with a beast. I'm tired of Fenrir scaring them. At least if they watch this, they know what they're signing up for."

"Fine." The woman crosses her arms. "I am Joy Lewis. I work as the secretary for Dr. Carter, and I'm here of my own volition to assist Fenrir and Dr. Carter in explaining the steps omegas need to take when sexually involving themselves with Fenrir."

"That last part makes it seem creepy," Scott says.

"Then cut it out." Joy sounds exasperated.

She's wearing yoga leggings and a tank top, meaning this probably wasn't filmed during work hours if she's actually his secretary. My nose crinkles in disgust like I'm already pissed at this woman I don't know because she dares to be comfortable around some man I don't even know. Jealousy is never cute, and it's definitely not cute on me.

"No, this is all going in. I don't want the omegas who see it to think I cut anything out that makes it seem unsavory," Scott explains.

The camera jiggles once, and then he's stepping around. I can only see the lower half of his torso and below, but that lower half is enough to get me starting to burn up. He's in navy slacks with a white button-down tucked into it. It's nothing sexual, but hot damn if I don't want him to roll up the sleeves on his shirt and show me his forearms. I've never been so affected by a man, and I'm wondering if my heat really does turn me into a horny bitch.

"Fenrir's about to show up." Joy raises her brows. "The whole thing is going to seem unsavory to anyone that can't handle him."

There's a pause in their talking before the lower half of Scott's body goes rigid and then relaxes again. He stalks over to the woman in the chair and leans over her. His hands are on either side of the chair, caging her in. I can still only see the back of him, but oh god, is he getting me all kinds of worked up.

I'm sure it's mostly the heat, but I have never felt so turned on in my life. I can't do anything but whimper as I watch the man lean down even closer to the woman in the video and sniff her.

" I was told to behave. " Scott's voice is dark and distorted. " Are you finally wanting cock? "

"Don't play with me, Fenrir," Joy says completely uninterested.

Her disinterest blows my mind because the man looks like a god just from the back. He's tall and built, which, of course, he is. He's an alpha. The way he carries himself, though, is like he knows he's in control of a room without even knowing where he's going. His blond hair is long enough that it's probably falling into his eyes as he leans over Joy, but not so long it looks unruly. I want him to turn around so I can see his facial features, but he stays facing her.

"Scott told you what you need to do, and I know he's telling you right now." Joy pushes him away and stands from her chair. "Now behave, or all the omegas you try to assist aren't going to take this video seriously."

" I don't care about the video, " Fenrir snarls.

"Oh, so you want more omegas that don't present for you?"

Fenrir growls low in his chest before snapping his teeth.

"That's what I thought."

" Fine, when a beast wants to fuck a female, she needs to present her cunt to him like a good little bitch. "

Fenrir's words should be terrifying, but if they don't have me spinning from how turned on I'm getting. I'll need to wash my sheets before I go to bed tonight because I'm making a mess with my slick right now.

Joy kneels on the ground at Fenrir's feet and then gets on her hands and knees. My pleasure is replaced with rage. I'm being utterly irrational by trying to stake any claim on an alpha I've never met before. Joy struggles to get into position, obviously uncomfortable with the whole thing, until she finally turns to face Fenrir.

"I sleep with beta females, Fenrir. You need to show me how I'm supposed to present."

My face flushes when Joy says that because she wants nothing to do with the alpha she works for. I made myself jealous for no reason other than being territorial. I can't help the overwhelming relief I feel when she says it, though. Yes, I know I shouldn't have been jealous, but I was, and now I'm just happy because my irrational brain can continue claiming the alpha even though I know it is so unbelievably ludicrous.

Fenrir kneels next to the woman. One hand goes underneath her abdomen as he tugs her upward. The other pushes down on her shoulder blades until she's face down on the floor. " Spread your legs far apart and then arch your back. " Joy follows his instructions, the camera capturing the position as she perfects it. Fenrir keeps moving her slightly and then stands when he's happy. He softly taps her arm with his foot. " Once like this, you need to spread yourself for me. "

Joy moves her hands to grab low on her asscheeks and moves her hands like she's spreading herself. She's still clothed in leggings and a t-shirt, but what the beast wants isn't hard to imagine. I also might know exactly how this looks, considering my browsing history.

"Anything else they need to do when presenting?"

" I enter, and they should be like this. They don't move unless I tell them to. "

"What happens if they don't look like this when you enter?" Joy asks.

" I masturbate. " Fenrir's voice sounds like he's frowning.

"No, for them."

" Oh, coma. No fun. Games over. "

"Why?" Joy keeps prodding even as she stays in the presenting position.

" Because I want the tiny omegas to submit to me, and if they don't, then I have to make them. Scott's not big on the whole making omegas do things bit, so I don't get to do that to the pretty omegas that visit me. "

Joy hops up from where she's at and sits back in the chair. "What next?"

" I'm in charge for the entirety of their heat. They do what I say when I say it. I can take any hole I want, and they don't complain when I do. " Fenrir paces the room, nodding along with what he's saying like it's all perfectly reasonable, and fuck it if I'm not sitting here nodding along like this is all perfectly normal and fine.

"So charming," Joy says through gritted teeth. "I see why there's always so many omegas choosing you."

Fenrir growls at her. So apparently, not a lot of omegas are picking the beast. I'm surprised because my entire body is shaking like a leaf in anticipation of what he's going to do to me.

" I am rough. I will bruise them, but I don't mark them. They're expected to take my knot with no warm-up and take it in every hole they have. If I leave the room to get us food or drinks, I expect them to present for me when I return. If at any point Scott thinks they aren't taking it seriously or thinks I'm going to hurt them, he'll inject the sedative attached to their arm. "

There's a long pause as Joy looks at a sheet of paper next to her chair. She reads over it, frowns, and sighs. "How many of them cry?"

" Plenty. "

I pause the video as fast as I can when he says that for two reasons. First, I can see his perfectly sculpted, sent from the gods' face, and the golden glow of his irises because his beast is in control. And the second reason is that I'm coming.

The first ripples of my orgasm hit me right as I get my hand between my legs to help me extend the pleasure. I ride out the orgasm, staring at the smirk on Fenrir's face as he says plenty. I stroke the image of him with my free hand as the orgasm finishes.

Tomorrow. He's mine tomorrow.

No, I can't be having thoughts like that. Not for alphas I've never met, and especially not for ones that I need to rely on to get me through my heat. I'm sure the sexy doctor has had plenty of omegas try to convince him to mate with them just because of the protection a title like his would bring. He doesn't need another omega throwing herself at him like that, especially when Fenrir just said he doesn't mark.

I click play on the video as Fenrir turns away from us again. Joy shakes her head in disgust or disappointment, I don't know. "If the omega wants to stop?"

" She says stop or no. I'm not a monster. " Fenrir at least looks upset about that question. " I give pleasure to omegas who can handle me. I don't want to cause distress to ones who can't. "

"Does Scott have anything else, or was that it?" Joy asks.

Fenrir turns to face the camera again, and I almost pause the video when another smile crosses his lips. " Present again, so the pretty omegas watching this can practice for me. "

"Unbelievable," Joy huffs but slowly gets back into the same position. "This good?" she asks, and Fenrir turns to examine her.

" That will work. " He returns his attention to the camera. " Are you both doing all of this for little omegas I fuck? " He walks closer to the camera until he's kneeling in front of it. His face is so close I can make out every detail. I wonder what color his eyes are when Fenrir's not in control. " I'm speaking with the little omega now? " He looks over his shoulder at Joy, who says something I can't make out.

Fenrir turns back around with a new smile that promises pleasure. " My little omega. " His voice is dark and lusty, and it has me coming again as I watch him speak to me. My hands are between my legs, rubbing at my clit, riding out my orgasm, knowing another one is waiting for me with the next thing he says. " Practice presenting for me. The better you present, the better I'll treat that sweet cunt. I spoil good little omegas. Be a good girl for me and practice presenting. "

"He's going to kill you." Joy pulls Fenrir back by the shoulder when his eyes change to a deep brown, and a scowl crosses his face.

"I'm back," Scott says as he stands up and moves away from the camera lens. "Fenrir, being so weird about things."

"Wait, are you actually going to leave that in the vid—" The video ends, pausing with Joy mid-question and Scott not in the picture.

My heart is racing as I continue to stare at the final frame of the video. I don't know what's happened to me in the last seven minutes it took to watch, but it's gotten me off twice with barely any help from any stimulation. I'm a wet, slick mess of my own arousal, but I can't seem to care very much. Either my heat is even closer, and I might die tonight of horniness, or I'm that affected by just the mere idea of being with a beast.

I should find him terrifying or at least be hesitant to share a bed with him after what he said, but if anything, I'm more excited. Joy said what he said would be unsavory to those who couldn't handle being with a beast. That should mean I can handle him since I do want it.

The whole video is one giant snack that's only making me hungrier for the real thing. That's what I'm telling myself, at least. It feels like all of this is foreplay, in a way. Not that there's anyone participating in it other than myself.

"One more time." I click replay on the video and watch it all the way through again.

My fingers trace over Scott and Fenrir's body as he paces around the room. I trace his lips when he's so close to the camera and speaking directly to me. When it finishes the second time, I start it over again and promise myself it's the last time.

When I actually pause it to stop watching, it's almost five, and I still don't have a response if I've been accepted or not. I wouldn't think anything of it if I were in a more rational mood. Maybe they got a little behind in their paperwork.

Unfortunately, I'm not in a rational mood and am instead worried that the alpha I've been touching myself to all day won't be able to assist me in my heat. It's the heat. It has to be the heat making me behave this way, but that doesn't stop me from grabbing my phone and dialing the number listed in the email immediately.

A woman answers after the first ring. "Dr. Carter's office."

"Joy?" Oh shit, that's weird.

"Can I ask who's calling?" she asks, a little confused.

"Sorry, I just watched the video, and your voice sounded familiar. Sorry," I blurt the words out too quickly and hope she understands what I'm saying. "My name is Lilah Kinsley. I'm waiting for confirmation on my appointment tomorrow. It said it would be in by five p.m. I know it's five minutes until then, but my heat is coming on strong, and I just thought I would check to see if I need to schedule at a different clinic."

"No need to apologize," Joy speaks slowly and calmly. She's probably spoken to so many crazy from heat omegas it's just second nature to her at this point. "Dr. Carter should've already gotten back to you, but I'll check with him right now. Are you doing okay, sweetheart?"

"Yeah." The word doesn't sound very believable as a cramp suddenly knots my stomach. "I'll be good. I just want to make sure I have somewhere to go tomorrow."

"Mhm, and I see here you've requested, oh—" She pauses, and I feel a blush burning my cheeks. "Oh right, you said you knew my voice from the video. Of course. Good, you've watched it."

"I have." The words are an octave higher than my normal voice because I'm mortified and somehow feel like she'll know I watched it on repeat for the last few hours. "I kind of need, like you know. I need the beast."

"Okay, nothing wrong with that. Between you and me, he's going to approve it," she says with certainty. "Fenrir doesn't allow him to reject any of the omegas that pick them. I'll check with him as soon as I hang up, but I'm sure he's just been busy or forgot to submit the decision on your application."

"Thank you," I squeak again.

"Is there anything else I can do for you, Lilah?" Joy asks as though everything we're talking about is normal, which I guess for her it is.

"No, that's all," I say quickly.

"If you don't get a confirmation in the next twenty minutes, give me another call. Technically, the clinic will be closed, but either Dr. Carter or I will be here to take your call."

"Thank you." I hang up and groan into my pillow.

A part of me wants to start practicing presenting so I know I can do it correctly before showing up tomorrow. The other part of me is begging me to wait for an acceptance of my application because I'm going to feel even worse about myself if I practice and end up in a coma anyway. Thankfully, the part of me that isn't willing to throw everything at the alpha and risk getting hurt wins the inner struggle.

I press my lips together before getting out of bed. I wrap all my blankets and sheets together and start the washing machine. At the rate my heat is coming on, I'll need to put down about five towels to sleep. I grab a glass of water, down it, and grab another.

My laptop dings with a notification. My heart stops beating for a solid ten seconds as I rush over and check if it's confirmation from the clinic. I click the email that has my confirmation along with generic information. At the end, there's a section for additional notes. I suck in my bottom lip and chew on it as I read the two words over and over.

Present naked.

I didn't even consider not presenting naked for the alpha. I thought that was the whole point, but now that he's requesting it explicitly, it makes me wonder if maybe the beast might be as excited for tomorrow as I am.

For him, I'm just another omega who needs assistance with her heat, but apparently, not all of them present naked and need to be told. Maybe I really will be able to take on a beast if I was already planning on presenting how he wants.

For the rest of the night, while I wait for the laundry, I alternate between watching the video and practicing how to present. I pull down a mirror from my wall and set it on the ground so I can make sure I arch my back enough, spread my legs far enough apart, and spread myself so all of me is on display. I want to be the perfect omega for the alpha's beast. I want him to like me. I know it sounds desperate. But I am desperate and needy, thanks to how close I am to my heat coming on.

If I'm honest with myself, it's thanks to who I am in general.