Fix You (The Irish Rogues #3)

Chapter Fourteen Maeve

A fter everything that had transpired tonight, the fact I was standing naked in front of Rafe was the most surprising. I couldn’t believe he was still here–that my breakdown hadn’t sent him running for the hills. It would have with most men.

But as I was starting to understand more and more each day, if not each minute, Rafe wasn’t most men.

His morally gray exterior was just a front for the man beneath. He’d shown me more care and concern than I could have ever hoped for. At the same time, I don’t know why I was surprised. He’d had an expensive necklace made for me to try to heal my pain.

Despite the enormity of him being engaged, I couldn’t tell myself to leave him alone. I knew he didn’t love his fiancee, and she didn’t love him. But it wasn’t just wrong.

It was a sin.

But in that moment, my desire overrode any morality I might’ve felt. I wanted him to possess me. No other man could touch me but him. I was standing at a cliff looking over the ragged edge.

I stopped thinking and just jumped. “Kiss me,” I pleaded.

Rafe didn’t have to be asked twice. He instantly slanted his head. Instead of crushing his lips to mine like I expected from the desperation blazing in his eyes, he came at me so sweetly. His velvet lips feathered against mine. It wasn’t what I was expecting, but I welcomed his tender side.

Gently, his tongue swept against my bottom lip. I slid mine across to meet his, and our tongues swirled against each other. I’d missed his taste. Even with the sweetness of the kiss, I felt the heat begin burning between my legs. I wanted so much more than what he was giving me.

Pulling away, I stared up into his face. “It hurts.”

Furrowing his brows, he asked, “Fuck, Maeve, did I do something wrong?”

I shook my head. “I ache between my legs.”

A possessive growl reverberated through his chest. “Do you want me to touch you there?”

“Can you try?”

“Yes, Tesoro .”

“And if I can’t?” I questioned in a whisper.

“Then we don’t have to do anything else. This is about you and your pleasure.”

I bobbed my head. Rafe’s hand that had been at the back of my neck slid down over my breastbone. My breath hitched as he cupped my breast in his palm. When he squeezed it, I moaned wantonly.

Rafe’s breath tickled against my ear as he continued to caress my breasts. “You are so beautiful when you’re aroused. The way your skin flushes such a pretty pink. The soft feel of your skin beneath my fingers. The goosebumps prickling along your body. It’s a gift to be touching you.”

Tears stung my eyes at his words. There had been no kind words the last time. Rafe was giving me the experience every woman dreamed of having.

Leaning forward, he dropped his head to bring his mouth to my breast. As he feathered kisses over my sensitive skin, I panted, “What are you doing?”

“I’m tasting you.” He brought his eyes up to meet mine. “Is that okay?”

“Mm, hmm,” I murmured.

He sucked in my nipple, causing me to gasp. His tongue swirled around the hardened tip before flicking quickly back and forth. The action caused wetness to pool between my heated core.

As he kissed across to the other breast, I tugged at the strands of his hair, causing Rafe to groan. His warm breath fanned over my sensitive flesh. Desperate to feel more of him, my hands trailed down the nape of his neck and across his broad back.

“I want to come, Rafe.”

“I know, Tesoro.”

He then eased me over to sit down on the edge of the bed. With his gaze locked on mine, he knelt down before me. “I won’t be above you. Not this time.”

“Okay,” I replied shakily.

“And I won’t put my fingers inside you either. It will just be my mouth on you.”

My chest rose and fell with anxious breaths. Somehow all my emotions converged at this moment. I’d been hurt so badly between my legs. Would I be able to finally bear someone touching me there? Could it actually be pleasurable?

Leaning over, Rafe brought his lips to one of my knees. He bestowed a tender kiss against my skin. Then he did the same to the other knee. As he kissed along my thigh, his hands came up to cup my knees. While I focused on the feel of his mouth brushing against my skin, he began easing my legs apart.

I couldn’t help tensing slightly. Slowly, I started to be sucked back into that night. With a shake of my head, I pushed the thoughts from my mind. Instead, I focused on Rafe’s dark hair in my lap.

When he placed a tender kiss on my pussy, a jolt of pleasure shuddered through me. “Want me to keep going?”

Unable to form words at that moment, I merely bobbed my head. Rafe’s tongue licked languidly up my seam. I sucked in a breath before arching my hips against his face.

Staring up at me, Rafe held my gaze as his tongue flicked back and forth across my folds. Heat burned through me at the erotic sight. “Mmm,” I murmured as his warm tongue worked over me.

“Is this okay?” he questioned, his voice vibrating against my pussy.

“Oh yes. It’s more than okay. It’s so good,” I panted.

After a few more teasing licks, Rafe placed his mouth fully on my clit before sucking it into his mouth. Aof pleasure tore from my lips. Instead of stopping, Rafe continued to lap and suck my clit. The feelings overwhelmed me. It felt like they would explode out of me.

Desperate for more or for a release, I began rocking my hips against his mouth. He took both my shins and pulled them up to rest on his shoulders giving him complete access to my core. His arms came around my waist to rest on my lower abdomen. As he pressed into my stomach, more pleasure shot through me, causing me to gasp.

While one of my hands clutched at the covers on the bed, the other came to Rafe’s head. With each pull of his mouth, I yanked the strands of his hair, causing him to growl.

When I started to release his hair, he shook his head. “Don’t stop. You make my cock throb so hard when you do that.”

“Oh,” I murmured as I brought both my hands to his head.

“Fuck yes, Tesoro ,” he murmured against my pussy.

I gasped as one of Rafe’s hands slid over my ribcage to cup my breast. The feeling of his mouth and hands on me was phenomenal, and I shrieked in pleasure. Wanting even more from him, I began to move my hips furiously against his mouth. When he sped up the pace, his tongue plunged in and out of me.

“Rafe, Oh God, Rafe.”

“Fuck, I love hearing my name coming off your lips.”

“And I love what you’re doing to me.” And I really did. I had no idea it could be this way. All this time a world of sexual pleasure was waiting for me. I only had to find the right partner.

Pinching my eyes closed, my head lolled back. “I’m close…so close.”

As my hips kept up a frantic pace, Rafe’s mouth suctioned hard on my clit. It was just what I needed to send me spiraling over the edge. My walls began to convulse. Calling out Rafe’s name again, I tugged and jerked at the strands of his hair as I rode out the harsh, yet glorious waves of the orgasm.

There were seconds when time ceased to exist. Moments where I couldn’t do anything but focus on the overwhelming pleasure ricocheting through my lower half.

And then when I started to come to myself, every molecule in my body seemed to shudder and restart. Overwhelmed by what I’d experienced, I fell forward into Rafe’s waiting arms.

Tears overflowed my eyes to stream down my cheeks as my chest rose and fell with harsh sobs. This emotional high was what I’d heard about, read about, and seen in countless movies.

But it was all real, and it was all mine.

Rafe tensed in my arms. “Oh God, Maeve, what have I done?”

Pulling my head up, I smiled at him through my tears. “You’ve given me the most amazing gift.”

Relief flashed in his eyes. “Are you sure?”

“Yes, oh yes, Rafe.” I brought my hands to his face before I kissed both of his cheeks. “Thank you, thank you, thank you,” I kept saying. Even as the tears continued to flow, I couldn’t keep the smile from my face.

“Oh Maeve,” Rafe muttered. I could’ve sworn there were tears in his eyes.

A sudden pounding came at the hotel room door, causing me to jump. Had my brothers found us? “Oh God,” I murmured.

“Who is it?” Rafe called.

“Sir, it’s me,” Milos called.

“Coming,” Rafe called. Turning back to me, he began folding the rumpled duvet around me. When I was sufficiently covered, he gave me a tight smile before hustling over to the door.

After he opened it, Milos’s gaze stared past Rafe to me sitting disheveled on the edge of the bed. His face reddened before he looked down at his feet. “I’m sorry to interrupt, but your sister has been trying to reach you. Ms. Kavanaugh's absence has been noticed. Mrs. Kavanaugh has called many times.”

At my gasp, Rafe threw a glance at me over his shoulder. “It’s fine.”

“But they know I’m gone.”

“That doesn’t mean they know who you’re with.” Turning to Milos, he said, “I’ll call her now. Thank you.”

Milos nodded as Rafe closed the door. As he started over to the nightstand for his phone, I asked, “What are you going to tell Caterina?”

“The truth.” At my squeak of alarm, he winked. “A version of the truth.”

Rafe had barely dialed when Caterina picked up. “Where are you?” she hissed over the speaker.

“I’m at the Parker House.” He glanced at me. “With Maeve.”

Caterina began furiously shouting in Italian. “Kitty Cat, would you stop? It’s not like that.”

“In a way it is,” I mused with a smile.

He shot me a look. After arguing with his sister in Italian, Rafe finally thrust the phone at me. “Here. You try talking to her.”

“Caterina?”

A pause came over the line. “Maeve? What the hell is going on?”

Like Rafe had suggested, I imagined a basis in the truth would help matters. “I snuck out to go to a club to try to take back my sexuality, and when Rafe caught me, he went with me… as a chaperone.”

Silence came over the line. “And how exactly did you end up at his hotel?”

I sucked in a ragged breath as memories flickered through my mind. “I had a breakdown. It wasn’t pretty. I didn’t want to worry anyone by coming home in my state.”

“Oh, Maeve, I’m so, so sorry.”

“I’m okay now.” I glanced over my shoulder at Rafe who was staring expectantly at me. “Rafe took care of me. He got me out of the street and back here. I’m fine now.”

Silence came over the line. For a moment, I’d thought we’d gotten cut off, so I questioned, “Caterina? Are you there?”

“I’m here. I’m just thinking.”

“I know it’s wrong of me to ask, but please don’t tell Callum.”

“I won’t. You have my word.”

“Thank you.”

“But I do want you to call him.”

“What?” I demanded.

“Call him and tell him what you told me. Except leave Rafe out of it. Tell him you’re safe at the Parker House. You need some time alone, and you’ll return in the morning.”

“And what’s going to stop him or the others from barging over here and dragging me home?”

“I will.”

I didn’t bother arguing since I knew Caterina was right. If there was anyone in the family that the boys listened to besides Mam, it was Caterina.

“Thank you for doing this.”

“You owe me. Big time.”

“I’ll find a way to make it up to you. I promise.”

“Just be happy, Maeve. That’s the way you can make it up to me. Be healthy and happy.”

“I’ll try.”

“There is just one more thing you need to do.”

“What’s that?”

“Despite where you sleep tonight, make sure there’s a room registered in your name.”

While I gasped at her innuendo, Rafe shook his head. “We’re not having sex,” he argued.

“I’m not a Sister of the Sacred Heart anymore, brother dearest. I know how the world works. There’s no way two people who look at each other the way you two do will be sleeping alone tonight.”

And with those parting words, she hung up. Rafe took his phone back from me. I thought he might be calling Caterina back, but then he said, “Yes, I need to reserve a room tonight for my client. Her name is Maeve Kavanaugh. Yes, t hose Kavanaughs.” The hotel clerk’s garbled voice echoed on the line. “Okay, thank you.”

He hung up and tossed his phone on the bed. “Apparently, I should’ve been checking in as a Kavanaugh rather than a Neretti since they’re comping a deluxe suite for you.”

I laughed. “I’m sure the same could be said if I was in New York.”

“True.”

Silence hung heavy around us for a few minutes. Rafe cleared his throat. “Right, well. They said the room is ready whenever you are.”

Cocking my brows at him, I said, “You really want me to go to another room.”

With a scowl, he replied, “Of course I don’t.”

“But you–”

“It’s what you need to do.”

“And what about what I want?”

“Maeve,” Rafe groaned.

“Just one night,” I pleaded.

Rafe exhaled a painful sigh. “And what happens in the morning?”

“You go back to New York, and I go back to Dublin.”

“But what happens when we see each other again at family gatherings?”

“We smile at each other and act as if nothing inside this hotel room ever happened.”

“And you think you’ll be able to do that?”

Of course I won’t. I’m already in love with you. Losing my virginity to you is just going to seal that deal even further.

I nodded. “I will.”

Rafe stared intently into my eyes. Just when I thought he was going to turn me down, he said, “All right.”

“Really?” At his nod, I asked, “What changed your mind?”

“I swore I would do everything within my power to help and heal you. If this is what it will take, then I have to do it.”

A nervous giggle burst from my lips. At Rafe’s surprised look, I shook my head. “It’s just I never heard someone being so honorable about a hookup.”

He grinned. “I suppose not.”

“What does your honorable self presume to do to me?” I teased.

With a groan, Rafe replied, “Keep talking like that, and I’ll lose all my honor.”

“Would that be so bad?”

“For this first time it would.” A serious look came over his face. “We should probably set some parameters.”

“Like what?”

“Do you want the lights on or off?”

“Since you’ve seen all of me in the bright lights, I want to see you the same.”

“Then see me,” Rafe urged.

I abandoned the covers around me and rose to my feet. My trembling fingers came to the button at his collar. After I undid it, I began working my way down his chest. Gripping the fabric, I untucked his shirt from his pants. After helping him shrug the shirt over his arms, I let it drop to the floor.

I then turned my attention to his bare chest. The dusting of dark hair. The intricate, multi-colored tattoos. The powerful bulging muscles.

As I ran my hands over his pecs, I murmured, “You’re so beautiful.”

“No, Tesoro, you’re the one who is beautiful.”

I shook my head at him. “Your body is…” I shuddered with desire. “Gorgeous.”

“Thank you,” he replied with a smirk.

Wincing, I stared down at the floor. “I sound like an idiot.”

Rafe’s chuckle rumbled underneath my fingertips. “No, you don’t.”

“I’m sure I don’t sound like the women you’re used to being with.”

“Look at me, Maeve,” Rafe commanded.

Reluctantly, I swept my gaze up from the floor to meet his onyx eyes. “Everything you say is genuine. It’s not a line that’s been used on countless other men. You’re saying what’s truly on your heart and mind. Nothing is concocted as part of a game.”

“I do mean every word.”

“And that’s what makes it so sexy.”

Smiling shyly at him, I brought my hands to his belt buckle. After unbuckling him, I then worked to unbutton and unzip his pants. As I pushed his pants over his ass, Rafe sucked in a breath, causing the muscles on his chest and abdomen to ripple.

Once his pants were deposited on the floor, my fingers hooked into the waistband of his briefs. But then part of my brain short-circuited, and I froze. I wanted so much to see and touch that part of him–that monstrously large part of him that strained behind the fabric.

But in that moment, fear overrode my desire. I knew the pain that part of him could cause me. Oisin hadn’t been as big as Rafe, and he’d hurt me so deeply.

At my hesitation, Rafe’s thumb came to my chin. He tipped my head up to look at him. As if he could read my mind, he said, “I will never hurt you. At the first moment you feel any pain, we’ll stop. Okay?”

Tears pricked my eyes at his kindness. His words also gave me the courage to push on. With my eyes locked on his, I reached inside his briefs and brushed my hand against his erection. At his groan of pleasure, a feeling of empowerment overrode any of my remaining fear.

Although I had no idea what I was doing, I gripped him at his base. I then began to slide my hand up and down like I’d seen in some of the porn I’d watched. Rafe’s grunt fueled me to work my hand even faster. When I glanced up at him, he stared at me through hooded eyes. “I love the feel of you in my hand,” I murmured.

Rafe’s chest began to pump up and down. The corded muscles in his neck tightened. Just when I thought I might send him over the edge, his hand came to still mine on his cock.

“Not yet. I want to come inside you.”

A shiver ran through me at his words. “I want that, too.”

“Are you sure?”

“Positive.”

Rafe nodded. “Go lie down on the bed,” he urged.

Without taking my eyes off his, I backed up until my knees hit the edge of the mattress. After I sat down, I began pushing myself back to the center of the bed. Rafe appeared to be contemplating his next move. I knew it had to do with the best way to approach me that wouldn’t have me remembering that night.

“Rafe?” I questioned when he remained staring down at me.

“We should have a safe word.”

I furrowed my brows at him. “Like in BDSM?”

As he knelt down on the mattress, his lips quirked up. “You know about BDSM?”

With a roll of my eyes, I replied, “Yes, I don’t totally live under a rock.” Jerking my chin at him, I asked, “Now answer my question.”

“In a way, yes, it would be like it is in BDSM. But more importantly, it would be a word to make sure you always feel safe.” He rubbed his knuckles along my jawline. “A word that when spoken, we stop no matter what.”

“Okay. What should it be?”

“You should pick it.”

Wrinkling my nose, I replied, “Me? But I don’t know anything about sex.”

With a cocky grin, Rafe countered, “You just said you didn’t live under a rock when it comes to sexual knowledge, so you should be fine.”

I scowled at him. “Whatever.”

Rafe’s expression grew serious. “This really needs to be personal to you.”

As an endless stream of words flickered through my mind, one stood out. “Rose,” I pronounced. Little Rose had been my childhood nickname. But I wasn’t a little girl anymore. Tonight I would become a woman for real.

“Rose it is,” he pronounced with a smile.

I watched as he bent over and reached for his pants. My brows furrowed as he took out his wallet. But at the sight of the foil wrapper, I understood and couldn’t keep the flush from warming my cheeks. After everything that had transpired tonight, I don’t know why I was suddenly embarrassed about a condom.

When he caught my eye, Rafe asked, “Are you on birth control?”

“No,” I murmured.

“Pity. I would love to come inside you.”

Unable to hide my curiosity, I couldn’t help asking, “Why?”

Desire glittered in Rafe’s eyes as he took his cock in his hand. My gaze dropped to watch him slide the condom over his length. “Because it would be like marking you as mine.”

At his words, Oisin’s words echoed in my ear, and the energy shifted in the room. Sensing my unease, Rafe quickly dropped down beside me. “I’m yours, and you’re mine, Maeve. Just us. No one else is here. It’s our moment.”

“O-Okay,” I replied, sounding as unsure as I felt.

Despite him giving me so much pleasure earlier in the evening, apprehension continued pricking along my spine. My mouth ran dry, and I nervously licked my lips.

Rafe eased in beside me on the bed. As his hand slid over my abdomen, I sucked in a harsh breath and fought not to tense up. My knees remained firmly together.

Instead of forcing them with his hand, Rafe’s breath warmed against my breast. “Open yourself to me, Tesoro.”

My brain sent message after message to my legs to widen, but they just wouldn’t obey. As if he could sense my tension, Rafe’s teeth grazed against my nipple before he gave me the tiniest love bite.

At my gasp of pleasure, my legs fell involuntarily open. Cool air swirled around my hot, aching core. Rafe’s warm hand cupped me there. His fingers began to swirl around my center.

Gradually, my apprehension started to wane. I focused on the pleasure building between my legs. Rafe continued to lick and suck my nipple. Closing my eyes, I bit down on my lip as the pleasure began to overwhelm me.

At the feel of his finger at my opening, my eyes flew open. “Easy, Tesoro,” he murmured against my breast.

Before I could tense up, Rafe gradually began to swirl the finger inside me. The fact that he didn’t force it helped relax me. His thumb began to rub against my clit. “Mmm,” I murmured, as my legs fell wantonly apart.

“That’s my beautiful Tesoro. Listen to how wet I’m making you.”

His dirty talk was like a bullseye hitting a target. My ears focused on the sound, which made me miss him sliding another finger deep inside me, which amplified my pleasure. As his fingers pumped in and out of me, his thumb continued rubbing my clit.

I turned my head on the pillow as my fingers gripped the sheets. My hips began to rise on their own violation. “That’s it, my good girl. Take your pleasure. Make yourself come all over my fingers.”

A moan escaped my lips at his words and actions. My chest rose and fell in harsh breaths. “Rafe, I’m close.”

Answering my plea, Rafe sped up the pace of his fingers while my hips furiously rose against his hand. And then I reached the peak. Screaming his name, I vaulted my hips off the mattress as my walls convulsed on his fingers.

With me still focused on the aftershocks of pleasure, he rose up between my thighs. Through my hazy eyes, I stared up into his hooded ones. Rafe dipped his head to bring his lips to mine. I wrapped my arms around his neck, drawing him closer. As our tongues tangled around each other, my hips began to rise, desperate for friction. Even after two orgasms, I found I was still insatiable.

Reaching between us, I gripped his erection. When I guided it to my drenched entrance, Rafe stared questioningly at me. “Are you sure, Tesoro?”

“More than I’ll ever be.”

“I’ll take it slow.”

“I know you will.”

“Eyes on mine,” he commanded.

As I focused on his beautiful dark eyes, there were so many emotions swirling inside of them.

Desire.

Hope.

Pleasure.

Kindness.

And the one that I wished was reflected there

Love.

Regardless if Rafe felt the same, I knew at that moment that I truly and completely loved him. And although it was the most inappropriate time to be thinking of the verse, I couldn’t help thinking that love was patient and kind –the very things Rafe had given me in abundance.

It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always preserves . While he had protected and trusted me, his feelings had obviously persevered over the months that we were apart.

Inch by delicious inch, Rafe began sliding slowly inside me. In that moment, no ghosts from the past danced precariously at our bedside. It was only the two of us.

A perfect communion between two souls.

A man possessed me with his body. But this time I had given myself freely and willingly. Tears once again pricked my eyes, but they weren’t ones of sorrow. They were of glorious joy at the new world that was dawning before me.

Once he was buried all the way inside me, Rafe smiled. “You’re mine, Tesoro.”

My heartbeat thrummed wildly in my chest at his proclamation. “Only yours,” I murmured back.

Dipping his head, Rafe kissed me tenderly. Slowly, his hips began to move, sending his cock plunging in and out of me. “Is this okay?” he grunted.

“Harder,” I pleaded as I arched my hips against him.

His brows furrowed. “Are you sure?”

I nodded. “Give me more of you.”

Rafe began to speed up his movements. I wrapped my legs around his waist, drawing him even closer to me. My arms went around his neck as we moved in perfect sync.

As Rafe’s tongue slid into my mouth, he brought his hand to where we were joined. His thumb sought out my clit and began to rub tediously circles over it. I moaned into his mouth, my hands gripping his shoulders as I incredulously started building to another orgasm.

But then Rafe’s hand moved to join his other at my waist. He then began to roll us over to where I was on top. When I stared down at him in confusion, a lazy smile curved on his lips. “You take control, Maeve. Use me to take your pleasure.”

At first, my movements were clumsy. Then Rafe’s hands on my hips began to guide me on and off his cock. Once I picked up the rhythm, I began to grind my pelvis against him for more friction. “That’s it. Take it all, baby,” Rafe urged.

I slammed on and off him, swinging my aching breasts up and down. Rafe leaned up to take one nipple into his mouth. His tongue encircling it, sucking it. Then his hand came back between my legs. As he bit my nipple, he pinched my clit, sending me over the edge. My nails scratched and clawed down Rafe’s chest as I took my pleasure.

A scream tore loose from deep within me. It almost felt like a battle cry. I suppose it was since I’d won the battle over my body and my mind. I was truly free of my past.

And I had Rafe to thank for that.

When I glanced into his face, I’d never seen him more beautiful. His jaw clenched as he pistoned his hips up and down. His chest and abdomen flexed under my fingertips with his movements. “Fuck, Maeve, you feel so amazing I don’t want to come. I just want to stay buried inside you.”

Smiling down at him contentedly, I replied, “I don’t mind.”

“Don’t want to hurt you,” he gritted out, as his body began to tense.

If I thought he was beautiful before, his expression when he began to come was stunning. It was pure male strength and power. His head kicked back as he shuddered his release. As he bit down on his bottom lip, his eyes pinched shut in pleasure.

And the sounds he made. God, they were sinfully hot. A shiver ran through me that I was the one causing those sounds.

When he finished jerking inside me, I stretched out my body across his. As he buried his head in my neck, he began speaking Italian to me while I ran my hand up and down his arm.

“Maeve?”

“Yes?”

“Are you sure you’re all right?”

I pulled my head up to stare into his eyes. My lips quirked as I said, “For the foreseeable future, I have no clue, but in this moment with you, yeah, I am.”

He smiled. “I know exactly what you mean.”

Feeling lighter than I had in the last year, I teased, “I’d say thanks for the sexual healing, but I know I have a long way to go.”

“One step at a time.”

“Exactly.”

I knew after tonight, I had the strength to keep putting one foot in front of the other. I’d made it this far, so there wasn’t anything I couldn’t do.