Grumpy Doctor’s Holiday Twins (Forbidden Doctors #17)

21. Melody

21

MELODY

I hung the final strand of lights and used the stapler to hold it in place and stepped back into the semicircle near the front of the float. The entire thing was officially finished and my life was my own again until the parade, when I had to at least be in attendance to view the judging at the end of the parade route. I smiled at our handiwork and turned to pat Lucas on the back. He stood to my right with a big grin on his face and his hands crossed over his chest.

"We did a great job," I told him, and he nodded his head. His eyes were full of wonder, like those of a child on Christmas morning.

"I am really glad I volunteered to be a part of this. Thank you for letting me help out." His nose was as rosy as everyone else's, but I thought it was adorable. Lucas and I had bonded a little this week working together after our shifts ended every evening. He was kind and sweet, but I knew in my heart that he wasn't the one for me.

"I'm taking off," one of the nurses said, followed by a chorus of agreement by the others. But Lucas lingered.

"Are you sure I can't take you home?" he asked, and I shook my head. I had already told John my car battery was dead and wouldn't even take a charge with jumper cables. He offered to drive me home and repair the battery for me when I was finished here.

"My brother's going to do it, but thank you." I had been shivering for the past twenty minutes and hoped John didn't take too much longer. Lucas was good company, though, so despite the cold, I was okay waiting here.

He probably remembered that we were supposed to have dinner tonight, and I hadn’t made my car battery die on purpose. But that was the thing that spoiled the plans. I made it my personal rule straight out of college to not accept a ride from someone unless I knew them well. I was supposed to meet him at the restaurant, and now that was impossible.

"I guess we'll have to have a raincheck on dinner." He was still smiling in spite of what I figured was disappointment, which was a pleasant change from Ethan's brooding grumpiness.

"I'm really sorry. I know you were looking forward to it. I'll look at my calendar, but after all the excitement of decorating and floats and tree farms, I think I need to focus on my twins for a few weeks. You understand." I felt bad letting him down, but he took it in stride. This was why I told him I was too busy until after the first of the year to begin with.

"Hey, you two!" I heard John's call and turned over my shoulder to see him approaching. Crystalized air puffed out around him with each breath, and he rubbed his hands together in earnest, trying to warm them.

"Hey, Dr. Winters." Hearing other people call my brother by his title always felt awkward. To me, he would always be just John.

"Dr. Hart, I'm glad I caught you. The board has decided on your reindeer idea, and unfortunately, I have some bad news." John tucked his hands under his armpits and his teeth chattered. He wore no coat or hat, and he obviously wasn't ready to leave yet. But he had news for us about the float, so I wanted to hear it.

"The reindeer are a no-go?" Lucas asked, and I could see the discouragement creeping into his expression.

"Yeah, man. I'm sorry. The board says they’re a health risk on the float. We can use them, but they have to be walked on a leash." John's pronouncement caused a flash of frustration on Lucas's face, and he kicked the tire of the float and shrugged.

After seeing the way Ethan would blow up at the slightest things at times, this reaction felt tempered. Lucas didn't shout or stomp his foot. He didn't glare at anyone or grumble out his frustrations. He nodded his head and sighed.

"Well, we'll still have reindeer. The kids will like it." When he looked up at me, I saw how upset he was, but I deeply valued that he wasn't going off. I was drawn to that part of his personality, and if I had to choose a man for my life, it would be someone who could handle their disappointment the way Lucas did. But he just wasn't the one for me.

"They'll love it," I told him, squeezing his arm.

"I'll get out of here. Take it easy, Mel." Lucas nodded at John and turned to go.

John and I stood watching him walk away, and I was alone with my brother. We'd barely spoken since he caught me kissing Ethan and grilled me about his being the twins' father. I hadn’t been avoiding him, but it felt like he was avoiding me. I just didn't want to discuss that topic. The rest of my life was free for his interrogation, the way it always had been.

John was the sort of brother who felt very protective, and it meant I had no secrets from him most of the time. Though, since Ethan was his best friend, I'd kept this one for a while. It seemed as though he’d figured it out and was furious, perhaps because I was able to get something by his radar.

"He's nice," John said, and I heard his teeth chattering.

"And not my type," I told him. "Let's go in. You're cold."

We walked toward the building and John started in on me immediately. "Is Ethan your type?" he asked, but his tone wasn't angry this time. I just didn't know what to say to him, so I stayed quiet. When the doors swished open and I still hadn't spoken, he continued. "I'm just trying to protect you."

"John, Ethan just took us for a ride because the twins were antsy." While that was my rationalization, it was far from the truth. I knew Ethan wanted me alone. He'd probably settled for me with my twins, but he'd planned that moment so we could talk.

"And the kiss?" John asked as we stepped into the warmth of the building. I figured he'd seen that and it was what set him off. I felt like a teen being scolded by a parent, not a woman able to make her own choices. I stopped by the elevator and stared at my feet with my jaw clenched.

"He's their father, right?" John asked me for a second time, and all I could think was how it was none of his business.

My hunched shoulders probably gave it away, but I refused to give him a direct answer. I'd been thinking of how to respond to him ever since that night after the pageant, and there was no good way to give him the truth. I couldn't just lie to him, especially since Dad knew the truth now. So I did the best thing I could and appealed to his affection as a brother and a friend.

"John, I've lived the past four years alone without Ethan in my life. I've been a mother for just over three years now. I am strong and capable and I know what I'm doing." I blinked back the tears and looked up into his stern eyes and said, "If you care about Ethan at all, you will drop this. Ethan is leaving town to follow his dreams, dreams he's had for years, and he deserves to follow those dreams."

My bottom lip trembled as the elevator doors opened and chimed. A few people walked out chatting and passed by us, and John stepped into the open doorway and put his foot against the door so it wouldn't close. Then he huffed and shook his head.

"I'm worried about you both, Melody. He's not the same person anymore. I hardly recognize him. And you're… Well, you're heartbroken and sad."

It was his turn to show the emotion, and I hated what I saw because it was real compassion. I had really messed things up, but the only way to get them back on track was to just let Ethan go. He'd be happier. I'd be happier. Life would return to normal.

"I'm fine, John. Just let it go."

John pursed his lips and backed into the elevator, and the doors shut. My heart felt like a lump in my chest. Nothing felt like the right thing anymore. Everything was so messed up in my mind, and I was doubting whether what I was doing was even good for Ethan, if he was just running from his problems and I was allowing him to spiral into worse mental health than ever.

I turned and walked back through the door and sat on a bench under the main entrance awning. Snow had started to fall lightly, though we weren't expecting much accumulation, and even though it was cold, I would rather have sat there alone than gone with John to his office to finish things.

When Lucas came trotting up, I was surprised. "Forget something?" I asked, and he huffed a few heavy, foggy breaths out.

"Keys." He chuckled. "John left without you?" Lucas lingered by the bench, and I shrugged.

"We had a disagreement. He's gone back to his office to finish a few things, I think." My hands, though gloved, were cold. I slid them into the pockets of my puffer coat, and Lucas sat beside me.

"Then I'll wait with you." His aura of happiness never failed to make me a bit lighter.

"You don't have to."

"I want to," he said, and he leaned back and crossed one leg over his knee. "The snow is so pretty, don't you think?"

I stared out at the snowflakes and tried to forget my broken heart. Right now, Lucas was what I needed. A good friend and a slight distraction. Once I got home, my babies would do that for me, and I'd be happy as I read them bedtime stories and tucked them in. And once Ethan was officially out of town, life would be normal. I just had to remind myself of that.