Grumpy Doctor’s Holiday Twins (Forbidden Doctors #17)

33. Melody

33

MELODY

M y heart caught in my throat as I had to pry my son out of Ethan's arms. Noel didn't want to come to me, but I was desperate to hold him in my arms. When the candy hit the pavement, he wanted to go after it like all the other kids, but I kept him on my lap. The people in the chairs in front of me were nice enough to share, but he saw one tiny piece no one had picked up. He kept pointing to it, but I told him no.

When he darted out there, I had no way of getting to him. The people in front of me were blocking the path. I had only looked down at my phone for a minute to send a picture to Dad of the floats as they passed. He was watching Holly at home since she didn't feel well. I didn’t want her to miss out and because of my being distracted, Noel almost got hit.

"He's okay," Ethan coaxed, hovering near me, but after the scare I'd had with Holly, I was a nervous wreck.

Out of nowhere, John was here, hand in the small of my back, guiding me away from the crowds. I shuffled along sobbing, holding Noel to my chest more tightly than I should have. His crying had stopped and he was asking for candy, but I was shaking like a leaf. I heard them saying things, but I found a bench and collapsed onto it, just glad Noel was safe in my arms.

"Oh, baby, Mommy said no candy from the street. Oh, God, you scared me." I wept and rocked him even when he struggled to get away from me, and John sat next to me and put his arm around me.

"Mel, it's okay. He's safe. It's alright." John's words didn’t comfort me, though I tried to let him. The weight of the past few weeks finally caught up to me and I couldn’t respond. I trembled and wept into his chest and shook, even when Ethan knelt in front of me and started talking to Noel.

If I hadn't been so distracted, this never would have happened. Dr. Hart passed by looking sad when he saw me, and then I took that picture of the float, and all I could think was that Holly was home alone again. I wanted to make her smile. I missed her.

"Mel," Ethan said softly, and I blinked out a few tears. A glance passed between him and John, and John stood to leave. I reached for him, but Ethan took his place on the bench and I whimpered. "Melody, it's okay." Ethan's strong arms wrapped around me and Noel, and I finally felt safe. He could do for me something my brother would never be able to.

"I'm so sorry," I cried, not for my emotional reaction, but for everything. For hurting him, for keeping secrets, for leaving town and not telling him. I just needed the pain and uncertainty to stop now.

"I know you are, baby. I know." Ethan's voice soothed me. I never expected him to comfort me like this. We hadn't even spoken about what had happened, but he was here, and even if he ended up leaving, I needed this moment.

"I'm so, so sorry." I looked up into his eyes, and he brushed away my tears, but he had tears of his own.

"Let's get you home," he said firmly, and he stood. Ethan took Noel from my arms and put his arm around me. Then he guided me toward my car. I couldn’t speak at all until we were there, where he buckled Noel into his car seat and refused to let me drive. He took my keys away and opened the passenger door for me.

"I'm fine, Ethan. You don't have to do this."

"Get in the car, Melody. Please." His earnest expression compelled me, so I climbed into the passenger seat and buckled up.

When he got in the driver's side, I put my head down. I knew he was hurt badly enough to not speak to me for days. I assumed he was leaving town and that he had been at the parade because his mother or maybe John had forced him to. It wasn't exactly his scene, and he wasn't really dressed for it, either.

"You know, I've always wanted kids." His voice was calm and even as he pulled out and turned away from downtown and the traffic. "I chose pediatrics because I love children. I believe they're our future. I wanted to make a difference that way, but I have always desired to have kids."

I sniffled and wiped away my tears with my mittens and glanced at Noel. After the sugar he'd already eaten, he looked ready for his nap. His cheeks were rosy from the cold and his nose was puffy from crying, but he stared out the window watching the scenery go past.

"Mom has always wanted grandchildren too. She makes sure to badger me about it every time I come home, as if Rick and Luke can't also do that for her. I think it's her way of making me feel important, like somehow I'm the one whose children could make her proud."

I felt like he was speaking gibberish. I didn’t know why he was talking about his mother. The longer he talked, the more uncomfortable I became. I didn't know why he was here, why John hadn't just brought me home. He had Holly at his place with Dad because we were supposed to be decorating gingerbread men tonight.

"And let's face it, I'm on the road a lot. So her badgering me is likely the only thing that would ever force me to settle down and?—"

"Why are you doing this?" I asked, cutting him off. He turned onto my street and pulled up in front of my place without even answering. Then he turned to me with a serious expression.

"Let's talk," he said, and he nodded at the apartment.

My heart jumped up into my throat and I sighed. There was no use in prolonging this any further. He had a right to hear my side of the story before he left town, and I just wanted to move on. My body felt stiff and rigid as we got Noel out of the car and Ethan carried his lightly slumbering form for me.

Inside, I got him laid down for his nap while Ethan prepared a sippy cup with warm milk, and when he was tucked in and sleeping, I brought the baby monitor and met Ethan on my couch. He had taken his coat off and sat with an arm stretched along the back, waiting for me. He patted the cushion next to him and I reluctantly sat there.

"You should know, your brother threatened to kill me if I hurt you, so try to make this easy on me." Ethan didn't even crack a smile as he said the words, and I pressed my hand to my forehead.

It was just like John to get involved. I wouldn’t have been surprised if John told him everything. I loved my brother, but he had a way of meddling and I hated that.

"I'm sorry," I mumbled, but Ethan put his finger under my chin and forced me to look up at him.

"It was my mom, actually. John said nothing, in case that was what you were thinking." Ethan's eyes were warm and compassionate, like the man I remembered from years ago.

"Your mom?" I was confused, but Ethan leaned forward and pressed his lips to mine. The kiss was light and passing, but I flushed with warmth as he pulled away.

"Thank you," he breathed, but he didn’t let me respond. "For loving me so much that you'd carry this horrible burden by yourself for so long just so I could chase my dreams." There were tears in his eyes, and it made mine well up again too.

"No, Ethan. The kids aren't a burden." I laid a hand on his chest.

"I meant the secret. When Mom told me you probably just loved me enough to let me go, I was angry. That didn't feel like love to me." He took my hand and brought it to his lips and kissed me, and I blinked out a few more tears. "But when John told me to talk to you about this, that I’d be surprised by what you had to say, I knew that was true, and I knew why.

"I told you over and over how bad of an idea we were together. How John would react, how we were coworkers. I gave you no reason to believe I wanted anything but no strings attached sex." His kisses on my knuckles as accurately he told me my own thoughts were so precious.

"But I?—"

"Shh, let me finish," he whispered. "I was set to leave. I was so hurt and angry, refusing to believe the best about you just like I forced myself to refuse to be happy during this season for so long. But I don't want to push happiness away anymore, Melody. I want happiness, and I want it with you. When I saw Noel run into that street, my heart instantly knew what I need. I need you.

"You are the thing that makes my heart come alive. I don't want that job because it will take me away from you. I don’t care if we live at the North Pole in Santa's very workshop. You're the woman of my dreams, and I need you to say you forgive me for being such a jerk."

"Oh, God," I whimpered, and I tried to lean on his chest, but he forcefully pulled me onto his lap. "Ethan, I'm so sorry. I just wanted you to be happy and I felt like this town made you so miserable. I thought I made you miserable. I know how much you love that job and?—"

"And I love you more." Ethan's mouth closed over mine, and I whimpered into the passionate kiss. The crushing way he held me against his body was so rough, yet so comforting, I couldn't pull away. His hot tongue sank into my mouth, and I moaned, sending a shiver straight to my core.

"Ethan," I panted shyly as he pulled away. Ethan smiled and brushed a stray hair behind my ear.

"Merry Christmas, Melody."

His hands gripped my hips and pulled me down onto his lap, and I kissed him again. I felt a rock hard heat pressing against my core.

"Ethan," I moaned, though whether it was a plea or a warning, I didn't know.

He stood up with me still straddling him and carried me to my bedroom. Ethan set me down on the edge of the bed and quickly removed my pants and thong. I was frantic to get my sweater and bra off, not even watching as he shed his own clothing. Our shoes and garments fell in a puddle before he crawled across the bed and claimed another kiss, then trailed kisses across my neck up to my ear.

He growled in my ear before laying a path of hot open-mouthed kisses down my neck. I arched back and moaned as his tongue flicked at my pulse point. "I want to be inside you so bad, I can't stand it." His hands searched my body as he nipped at my skin. After everything that had just happened, I felt like the only way I’d feel safe was if we were one again.

I grabbed at his shoulders, dragging him back up to me. "Then do it, Ethan. I need to feel you in me too.”

Ethan's eyes darkened with desire and need. He aligned himself with my core, his hard length pressing against my aching heat. He groaned as he fully sheathed himself inside me, and I wrapped my legs around his hips and hooked my ankles.

"I love you too, Melody," he whispered against my lips before capturing them in a hungry kiss. His hips began to move in long, slow strokes, setting a pace that had every nerve ending in my body on fire. The bed creaked in time with our movements and I dug my fingers into his back.

My whimpering and soft cries met his grunts of pleasure and the growls he let out as he continued to suck my neck and collar bone, leaving love marks. My pussy clenched and ached for climax, and he worked his hips at different angles until he had me panting and breathing heavily.

“I’m close… so close,” I moaned, arching my head back, and he bit my neck hard. When he kneaded a breast, I shuddered and snapped. My body convulsed beneath his as he slowly drove into me over and over again. I moaned and gasped and twitched and slowly, the climax passed, but I was still desperate for him.

“Does this mean you’re staying?” My question was cut off by more kisses, Ethan biting my lower lip and sucking it into his mouth. Then he slid a hand under my body and rolled, taking me with him. I gasped then snickered as I found myself straddling him.

I tossed my hair to the side and got it out of my face, and he grabbed both tits and squeezed. “Does this mean I get this incredible sex any time I want it?” His hips started thrusting again, rising and falling to push his hard dick deeper into me. I grunted and put both hands on his chest for support as I started to bounce.

I couldn’t make out coherent thoughts, let alone answer him, but I wanted it. More than he would ever know. I needed him inside me, around me, possessing me in the way only he could.

"Yes," I finally managed to gasp out as I rode him harder. I whimpered and panted, throwing my head back and letting out a growl of ecstasy as orgasm washed over me again. His thumb found my clit and rubbed, and I had a hard time matching his rhythm, so he took over.

"Tell me you'll stay," I begged, my voice a hoarse whimper. Ethan’s breathing was labored and his grip on my hips bit into my skin, but I didn't mind. "I want to hear you say it."

"Yes," he hissed as his hips rose and fell in a desperate attempt to find his own release. "I'll stay… forever…”

The words were magic, pressing buttons in my mind that drove me wild. I was lost in the moment, lost with him. His thumb returned to my clit and massaged while his words coaxed more desire from me than I’d ever felt.

“I want you in my life, and I want to put more babies in you. God, woman, you drive me insane in all the right ways. Say my name. Say my name as you come again.”

I clenched my jaw and gasped. Spit flew from my mouth as I was on the edge again. This one promised to be better than the last two, and all I could do was hang on for the ride. Our bodies slapped together and Ethan sped up, almost desperate.

When he mumbled, “Oh, God, condom,” I whined.

“Don’t you dare pull out… My God, I’m gonna—” And my body exploded for the third time. Spasms gripped me, starting at my core and radiating outward until I was crying, letting my head loll to the side as I felt Ethan’s dick pulse and fill me. The heat surged upward then drained down around his dick and soaked the space between us. My body trembled and jolted, and I lay down across his chest as his sex finished draining from me.

I lay there panting for a few minutes, trying to catch my breath, as Ethan pulled out and sprawled out next to me. Everything was peaceful and the world felt right until I heard Noel squeak. He was fussing, and that meant our time was done. I moved to sit up, but Ethan caught me and pulled me down for a kiss.

"I'll do it. You rest," He said, then he rolled out of bed and grabbed his pants, sliding them on without his boxers.

I grinned at the empty space in the bed as he went to be a dad and sighed contentedly. But the contentment lasted only a few seconds before reality sank in.

Ethan had promised to stay. But that didn't mean he'd be happy. John would definitely give him a job, but it wouldn't be his dream job. I had asked him to stay, which was something I promised myself I'd never do, and I did it anyway.

Would Ethan only grow to resent me now? That was the last thing I wanted. This shouldn't have happened this way, and now there was no taking it back.