Hello Quarterback (Hello #8)

53. Ford

53

FORD

I stared at my dad, who was in my entryway, lacing up his tennis shoes to go for a run with me. Well, he’d be biking while I ran. Just a reminder of that day Mia and I shared in California that had me hoping for the beginning of something beautiful.

“You know you can go home, right?” I asked him. He’d decided to stay with me after the game to keep an eye on me.

He finished lacing up his shoes and stood up, stretching out his hips a bit. “If one of my kids needs me, I'm here.”

“I understood that when you insisted on coming to my doctor’s appointment, but now?” I shook my head at him. “Do you really think you can keep up with me?”

He rolled his eyes at me. “Your doctor said you’re ready for an easy run, not a race.”

“Fair,” I replied, but now I was reconsidering it. It had been over a week of only training arms and abs. My foot wasn’t a hundred percent, but at least the wound was completely closed, pink skin knit together in a hard, jagged scar. My doctor said as long as I eased back into training, I might be able to reach full capacity within a few weeks.

He held open the heavy front door for us, and I began an easy jog around my property. I enjoyed running in the grass, beating a trail into the earth. Today was cold enough I had to wear a headband to keep my ears from aching. My dad wore a sweatsuit he probably bought in the eighties.

But he pedaled beside me, easily keeping up. “How’s the foot feel?” he asked.

It was hard to explain. My skin felt tight, like it was tugging at itself, which made each step feel awkward and uncomfortable. I settled on saying, “It’s okay.”

“Good,” he replied. “What are your plans for the day?”

“We have a team meeting, game tape review, practice. Then a check-in meeting with the charity board.” My feet were beginning to fall into a rhythm. Three steps to a breath in, three steps to a breath out.

I missed this.

But Dad reminded me of something else I missed. “What about Mia? Any plans with her?”

I gave him a look before focusing back on the trail of brown and yellow grass, trees missing most of their leaves. “No.”

“Why not?”

I had to remind myself to loosen my shoulders for an easier gait. “I sent her flowers and chocolate to celebrate her acquisition... The delivery people told me she gave it to her assistant.”

Dad was far too amused by that.

“Keep laughing and you’re going to fall off your bike,” I huffed, rounding a corner at the fence.

He was still smiling as he biked beside me. “You thought some flowers were going to win her back?”

Now I was a little embarrassed, my foot completely forgotten. “I thought it would help,” I admitted.

“She’s a rich, successful woman who’s been supporting herself for years. If she wanted flowers or chocolates, she could buy them herself. You need to give her what she really wants. Something money can’t buy.”

“What I really need is a time machine,” I said. My muscles were starting to burn. We must have been a mile and a half in.

Dad was breathing easily as he said, “Do you want to be with her?”

That had me stopping in my tracks. He was a few yards ahead of me when he stopped his bike and got off to talk to me. I had my hands laced behind my head to catch my breath, stretch my chest. After a few deep breaths, I said, “It’s not that easy.”

He tilted his head. “What does that mean?”

It was embarrassing to talk to Dad about what I’d done, especially since he’d been putting up the horses and hadn’t witnessed it. I’m sure Fletcher told him, but snapping at Mia because I was upset wasn’t my finest moment. Neither was losing myself in a relationship.

“I’d do anything to make her happy,” I said, my throat getting tight.

Dad reached out and touched my arm. “Of course you would.”

“That’s the problem!” I said, pacing because I was frustrated. “I’d break all my rules for her. Lose myself just to see her smile. But that’s not the man she deserves, Dad. She deserves a man who is wholly himself and brings the best of himself to the table. And she won’t settle for a man who pushes her away when things get hard.”

He was quiet for a moment, thoughtful. “So then you have two choices.”

I looked up at him, waiting.

“You can become the man you think she deserves, or you can stay who you are and let her go. And for the record, there’s nothing wrong with that,” he said. “You are an incredible man, Ford. You’re kind to your family, you’re a leader for your teammates, you’re changing lives with your charity when plenty of men in your position would be spending every dime on themselves. You are good exactly as you are. The question is, are you interested in getting better, maybe for Mia, but ultimately, for you?”

I gripped my shirt, holding on to it at my waist. I was sweating just enough that a cold breeze made me shiver. “We better get going,” I said.

He nodded, getting back on his bike. And we worked our way around the property, the question spinning through my mind.

Evolution was in my DNA as an athlete. I’d always strive to be more. But when it came to Mia, I had to wonder... Was it already too late?

When we got home, Dad and I both went to our own rooms to wash up. But instead of getting in the shower right away, I pulled out my phone to get a different perspective.

It seemed like everyone in my life was coupling up, in the throes of love. I needed to talk to the one person who was completely okay being on his own.

And within a few rings, he picked up.

“What’s up?” Hayes said, the clanging of car repair sounds going on in the background.

“Never thought I’d say this, but I need your advice.”

Hayes laughed heartily. “This calls for some office time. Hold on.”

I waited on the line while the background sounds faded until they went totally silent with the shut of a door.

“I’m sitting at my boss desk. Hit me.”

I rolled my eyes, picturing Hayes sitting back, boots on his desk, spinning that lip ring of his. And I almost felt embarrassed asking this question, but hell... desperate times called for desperate measures.

“You’re single,” I said.

He waited. “Did you call to tell me that?”

I ground my teeth together. “And you plan to be single for the rest of your life, right?”

“I mean, define single.”

“Hayes,” I chided.

He huffed. “I’m not getting married or shacking up if that’s what you mean.”

“It is,” I replied. I took another breath. “How? Why?” Part of me thought it would be so much easier if I could just be satisfied being alone.

“Cause I’m a fuckin’ wimp,” he replied. It was the last thing I expected to come out of his mouth.

“What?”

“Think about it,” Hayes replied. “Hot sex any night with any woman. My own place with no one griping at me to clean it up, or worse yet, making the thing a mess. I can change my schedule anytime I want without disappointing anyone. No one’s asking me to sell my motorcycle. It’s great. Or I could pick one woman, and yeah, I might love her, but then you have to deal with all the changing moods, changing hormones, sickness, money issues, another whole side of a family, more opinions about my business, my life... and God forbid I fall for someone and something happens like what happened with Mom. You saw what that did to Dad. So, for me, it’s an easy choice. Why the fuck would I want to go through all that when I’m happy as I am?”

I took in his words, thinking Hayes might be the unsung genius of us all. My life was easier before Mia was in it.

But then Hayes asked, “Are you happier with or without her?”