His Secret

17. Matías

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

MATíAS

It’s the middle of November, and we’re having our first official date. Well, at least that’s how we’re referring to it. We’ve had several nights alone here in my room, and we’ve been to a couple of parties, but we haven’t had what felt like a date.

We go to a movie, and it’s safe because college guys go to movies together all the time. It doesn’t outwardly look like we’re a couple. As long as we don’t hold hands, kiss, or stare longingly into each other’s eyes, then Adrian’s secret is safe.

But in the back of the dark theater, he rubs his leg against mine and I grin. His fingers dance over my thigh at the darkest moments in the movie and my pulse races.

By the time the movie is over, we’re both starving, so we stop by Nicola’s pizza parlor, and decide to eat inside.

The air is a biting thirty-nine degrees in windy conditions, so the warmth of the restaurant is inviting. We sit at a booth in the back, blowing our breath into our hands to warm them up.

We order a large pizza and some drinks, but before it’s even out, Adrian’s roommates show up .

“Hey!” Tyrell says, spotting us as soon as he walks in.

“Did y’all already order?” Frankie asks, scooting in next to Adrian.

“We did. What’re y’all up to?” he questions.

Tyrell sits next to me. “Just came to pick up some pizza before we head to this party. You guys wanna come?”

I would rather die , I think to myself. Tonight is our date night, which will hopefully be ending in us having sex for the first time, so I definitely don’t want to go to a party. I try to get the message across with my eyes.

“Whose party?” Adrian asks.

“Thatcher’s.”

“Gene Thatcher?” he questions.

“Yep,” Frankie replies.

“Nah. I don’t really like that guy.”

“Why?” Tyrell asks.

Adrian shrugs. “We had some beef last year. I’d rather not.”

Tyrell shrugs. “So what are y’all gonna do?”

The pizza gets dropped off at that moment, and then Adrian says, “Eat. Probably convince Matías to tutor me so I don’t fail the exam coming up in project management,” he says with a grin.

I roll my eyes.

Frankie chuckles while standing up. “Well, I’m gonna go check on the pizzas. I’ll see y’all later.”

“Bye,” I say as they both get up.

“See ya,” Adrian says, grabbing a piece of pizza. “Well, at least they didn’t stay.”

“Do you really not like the guy who’s hosting?

He wipes his mouth with a napkin and grins. “I hardly know him, but tonight is our night. I want you all to myself.”

I smile and take another bite.

When we get to my room, I excuse myself to the bathroom to prepare for tonight. Adrian wants to be inside me, and while I also want to be inside him, I know that’s a conversation to have later. I’ve been both top and bottom before, so this isn’t new to me. Everything is new to him, and I want him to feel at his most comfortable for our first time.

In the room, I find him sprawled out on my bed, his legs spread, one dangling off the side while his fingers are locked behind his head as he watches TV.

“You look comfortable,” I say.

“I’d be more comfortable with you next to me,” he replies, moving to the side and patting the free space next to him.

“Who knew you’d be such a cuddler?” I ask with a laugh.

“I haven’t been. I mean, not really.”

I climb in next to him and give him my back. “We’ve never talked about your dating history.”

He laughs. “I don’t have one to speak about.”

“Come on. You’ve dated people. Have you seen you?”

“In high school, I dated two girls.”

“And you didn’t cuddle?”

“No. I was sneaking around,” he says with a laugh. “We didn’t have time to hang out in bed. If my parents ever caught me, I’d be killed. Sex is for married people only.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah. So, I didn’t do a lot of cuddling. We’d meet at the mall or go to a movie because I could say I was just out with friends. I never wanted anyone to meet my family anyway.”

“What about your first few years here?”

“There’s been moments.”

“Moments? ”

“Drunk moments. One drunk moment stretched into a couple of months.”

“Wow. That long?”

He playfully squeezes my side. “Shut up.”

“Are you…” I pause, not sure how to word this or if I even should. “Are you really into women?”

He goes quiet behind me and I regret asking. I spin around to face him. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have asked.”

His fingers run through my hair. “It’s fine. I’ve been asking myself the same thing, actually.”

“Really?”

“I’ve been with women. Not a lot. Not what people would assume, probably, but you know, I’ve given it the good ol’ college try.”

I snort.

“I always thought it was fine. Nothing to write home about. I figured it wasn’t great because we were either too young and inexperienced, or didn’t really know or like each other. Just drunk hookups, you know? Or…” he trails off. “I don’t know. I’ve been interested in guys for a while. Intrigued, I guess I should say. I’ve found myself attracted to a few, and the porn was always better for me.”

“So, you think you might be gay? Not bi?”

“Probably.”

I kiss his lips and the conversation stops there. Our hands start roaming, and I wrap my leg around his, grinding into him with a moan.

He turns, pushing me onto my back while he braces himself over me. He kisses my jaw and neck, sucking at the flesh before gently biting down.

“Oh, yeah,” I cry, my hand flying to the back of his head to hold him in place. “Lube’s in the drawer.” My voice is low and husky .

He leans over to get it, settling himself on his knees between my legs. I watch as he pours it into his hand before pressing his lubed up fingers against my hole. He holds eye contact as he slips one fingertip inside.

I bite my lip and give him a nod to let him know to keep going. His finger travels deeper into me, thrusting in and out at a cautious and leisurely pace.

“You okay?” he asks, his face showing a hint of concern.

“I’m fine. More.”

His tongue swipes across his bottom lip before another finger slides in next to the first.

“Oh, god,” I moan, eyes closing as my back arches.

“You like it?” he questions.

“Yes,” I answer with a slight chuckle. “Yes, Adrian, I love it.”

There’s a low rumble in his throat before he really begins moving his fingers. He leans over me, kissing and licking my neck while stretching me out.

After a while, he pulls away, but keeps his fingers inside, watching his actions and moaning his pleasure.

“Mm. My god, Matías.”

My name has never sounded so good before.

“I’m ready,” I tell him frantically. Desperately. “Please.”

Slowly extracting his fingers, he pours more lube into his palm and rubs more into me. Leaning over, he snatches the condom he placed on the nightstand, and I watch enraptured as he slides the latex over his length.

With more lube in his hand, he strokes himself before taking a deep breath and meeting my gaze.

“Ready?” he questions.

“Yes. Are you?”

He gives me a nervous smile. “Yes.”

He begins to push in, his eyes focused on where he’s disappearing inside me before they flicker to my face to see if I’m okay.

I nod and he goes in a little deeper, his head fully inside now.

“Fuck,” he groans. “Oh, my god.”

He braces himself on either side of me, his hips pushing forward until he’s all the way in. We both cry out at the same time.

“Holy shit,” he says. “So fucking tight.”

I moan. “You’re so big.”

“Is it okay?” he asks, concern coating his voice.

I manage to let out a chuckle. “Yes. Big is good.”

He smiles and begins rocking his hips again. He’s full of praise for me, and I’m hardly doing anything.

“God, you’re so good,” he says. “You feel so good.”

His forehead rests against mine as he rotates his hips while he’s deep inside.

“Holy shit,” I say on a gasp. “Adrian. Fuck.” I dig my nails into his back.

Easing away, he kisses my cheekbone before resting on his knees. He holds my legs apart, pushing them up slightly as he fucks me.

“Oh my god,” he moans, eyes focused on where our bodies meet. “This…” He thrusts deep, closing his eyes, a rumble in his throat. “This is so good.”

I watch his body move, every muscle rippling. He’s built like a god, and right now he’s mine. I praise him, telling him how much I love his body, his cock, and how good he makes me feel. He moans, my words making him move faster and go deeper.

I reach for my dick, stroking myself as I watch him. He holds the undersides of my thighs, slowly pulling out just to watch himself slide back in .

His cheeks are red, and his lip is taking abuse from his teeth as he keeps biting down on it.

“So fucking good,” I tell him. “You’re so fucking good.”

He looks at me and holds eye contact, something whirring in his brain. There’s something in his eyes that tells me he wants to say something, but he doesn’t. Instead, he leans over me again, pressing a kiss to my lips before his tongue twirls with mine.

Leaning on one arm, his other reaches down and grabs the side of my ass, squeezing the flesh.

His thrusts change, now short and staccato.

My hands find their home on his lower back, sliding over the curves of his ass. “Yes, yes,” I chant. “Give it to me.”

“Oh, god,” he grunts. “Oh, god. Matías. Fuck.”

“Come for me,” I whisper.

“Oh, yes. I’m coming. I’m coming. I’m co?—”

His words are cut off by an animalistic roar. His back bows, and he thrusts deep before going back to the shorter thrusts, moaning in my ear. Another deep thrust and that’s where he holds, and I feel his cock twitching and throbbing inside me.

“Oh, yes,” I cry, running my hands up his back. “Yes.”

He’s sucking in air like he’s struggling to breathe, his sweat mixing with mine as his head rests in the crook of my neck.

Then he eases away, back on his knees, and keeps thrusting.

“Stroke yourself,” he says through labored breaths. “I need to see you come with me inside you.”

Need . Not want.

I flatten my tongue and lick my palm before wrapping my fingers around my dick. My fist moves up and down my shaft as I watch him—his face full of bliss .

It’s never been like this before. I’ve never felt this way while having sex. The pleasure is amazing, but it’s not just physical. What I feel is also internal. It makes the physicality part of sex even more enjoyable.

I’m not closing my eyes and focusing on what his dick is doing and the sensations it’s providing. I’m staring into his eyes, watching his lips, and the way his Adam’s apple bobs when he swallows. I’m enraptured by how he’s looking at me, and suddenly, I’m coming.

“Oh, god,” I cry out, eyes finally closing as I throw my head back.

I grunt and suck in deep breaths as cum shoots up in the air before landing on me.

“Oh, yes,” he murmurs. “Holy shit.”

I keep stroking, my movements slowing as I watch the rest of my release drip onto my stomach.

Adrian stops moving, both of us only capable of sucking in all the oxygen in the room.

I let my hand flop to the side, my entire body spent.

“Oh, my god,” Adrian says, the words filled with reverence.

He pulls out slowly, holding onto the condom as he eases back. He steps off the bed and discards the latex in my trashcan.

Kneeling on the floor next to the bed, he brushes the wet strands of my hair out of my eyes and kisses me softly on the lips. He pulls away to meet my gaze and then kisses my forehead. Something about the gentle moment after having such incredible sex makes my heart thump and my eyes burn.

“It’s not the best time to say this,” he begins, making my lungs seize. “I’ve thought about it a dozen times already but I’ve been too scared. It’s not just because of this. What we just did. ”

My eyes feel like they’re bulging out of my head, waiting to hear what he’s about to say. “Okay,” I manage to get out.

“I love you, Matías.”

The air whooshes out of me, and I stare at him for several seconds before saying, “I love you, too.”