Ice Cold Duke (Frigid Dukes #2)

Chapter 29

Chapter Twenty-Nine

“ I can’t believe it is your wedding day!” Emery sighed as she sat across from Georgina as her friend stood in front of the full-length mirror, admiring her reflection, a dazed and deliriously happy look on her face. “And just three days ago we were afraid that this would never happen!”

“I know,” Georgina said, laughing as she grabbed the skirts of her dress and swished them back and forth, admiring them. “I can’t quite believe it myself!”

“I am truly delighted,” Emery said, fighting back tears as she gazed up at the radiant smile on Georgina’s face. “There is nothing that could make me happier than seeing my best friend happy like this.”

“Really?” Georgina asked, turning to face her, and her smile slipping slightly. “Truthfully, I feel almost guilty being this happy when things have gone so badly in your own marriage.”

“Oh, don’t worry about that,” Georgina said, waving a hand dismissively, although inside, she had to privately agree that things had gone very badly in her own marriage. “If there is anything positive that came from the disaster that was my marriage, it is the fact that you and Henry have ended up together.”

“I am ludicrously happy that Henry and I are to be married,” Georgina said, and she stepped down from the small pedestal she was on to join Emery on the settee. “It was all so surreal! One second, I was sitting at home, wondering what fate had in store for me, and then the next second, Henry was bursting through the door, shouting that we were to be married and that his brother had procured a special license.”

“So it was a romantic proposal after all?” Emery asked, laughing at the look of delight on her friend’s face.

“It was,” Georgina giggled. “It wasn’t at all the proposal I’d expected or dreamed of, but in its own way, it was even better, because it is now our story: no one’s else’s. And although it may be unusual, it is all the more romantic for it.”

Emery smiled as she thought about this. It reminded her a bit of how she had felt about her and Lucien before everything had fallen apart. It might not be the romantic story that people read about in books, but because it had been their own romance, it had been the most beautiful and romantic of them all.

Still, she probably shouldn’t think about Lucien right now…

Something of her melancholy must have shown on her face, because Georgina’s face clouded slightly, and she took Emery’s hand. Leaning close, a mischievous look came into her eyes.

“What if we had a wee dram of something?” she whispered. “To give us courage for the big day that is to come?”

Emery laughed. “I’m not sure I’m the one that needs courage,” she pointed out. “You are the one who is getting married.”

“Well, I can hardly drink alone, can I?” Georgina laughed and shook her head. “Let me see what I have here under the vanity. I often keep a bottle of something in case I’m having trouble falling asleep at night…”

“I knew there was a reason we were best friends,” Emery said, leaning back in her seat as Georgina rose and went to the vanity. She pulled out a drawer and unearthed a bottle of brandy and two glasses, which she brought back over to the settee.

“Here we go,” Georgina said happily. “Brandy for us on my wedding day.”

“Are you sure you want to be tipsy when you walk down the aisle?” Emery asked.

“I’m sure that I want to have a drink with my best friend before I marry my other best friend,” Georgina said, a glint of mischief in her eyes.

She poured the drink, and then the two of them toasted one another and each took a long sip. The warmth of the drink hit Emery at once, and she relaxed into it, letting it smooth out her nerves and anxiety, deadening the sadness inside of her and loosen her tongue.

“I haven’t drank anything since the night before my own wedding,” she said, suddenly remembering. “It wasn’t such a good idea, but I suppose I might as well now.”

“You were very determined when you were drinking,” Georgina said, laughing as she took a small, dainty sip from her brandy. “And it might not have been a good idea, but, as you said a few days earlier, it’s better you ended up married to the Duke rather than to Henry.”

They were both quiet for a moment, then Georgina asked, a little bit tentatively, “How are you doing with everything? In the excitement of planning my wedding in just a few days, I know I’ve neglected to check in on you properly.”

“Don’t worry about me,” Emery said quickly. “I’m doing well.”

“Are you sure? I can feel the hurt in you, Emery… I’ve known you a very long time, after all.”

“I suppose I am hurt,” Emery said slowly. “Every time I think about Lucien, I get this terrible, silly feeling like he might change his mind about everything and try to win me back. And then I ask myself why I should be waiting around for him to change his mind, when I am the one who knows it wouldn’t work.”

“Because you love him,” Georgina said simply. “That is only natural.”

“But why should I love him?” Emery asked, shaking her head. “Why should I love someone I know is bad for me? Why can’t my heart just cut off these feelings the moment it no longer makes sense?”

“The heart doesn’t work like that,” Georgina said, a small, sad smile playing across her lips. “I tried to tell myself the same thing after Henry and I were caught in the hedge maze. I tried to tell myself that he wasn’t good for me when he would knowingly lead me to my ruin. But it didn’t change anything. He is the man I love, and that’s just the way it is.”

“Well, your story got a happy ending, so at least there is that,” Emery said, forcing herself to smile. As much as she wanted to burst into tears, she knew that wasn’t an option. Today was her best friend’s wedding day, and she had to put on a brave face for her. “And mine has a happy ending too, in its own way. I shall enjoy being independent. Half of each year I will spend in London with the Duke and his sisters, until each one is married off, and then for the rest of the years, I won’t have to see him.” She grinned at Emery. “And I have thought about how I will occupy all my time.”

“Oh?” Georgina asked, smiling.

“I shall help take care of all my nieces and nephews, of course!”

Georgina laughed. “I don’t think Henry and I will have children right away. We are already so young ourselves to be married.”

“Well, eventually you will, and when you do, I will take care of them. I’ll be their favorite aunt--which will be a competitive category, considering they have three more on Henry’s side.”

“I have no doubt you will be their favorite aunt,” Georgina said. “Here’s to that!”

And she reached out and clinked her glass against Emery’s. Emery drank heartily, and as she did, she wondered if it would be as easy as she made it sound to Georgina. Being an aunt would be marvelous, but it might also be hard to only ever be an aunt and never a mother. What will it be like to watch all my nieces and nephews grow old and to know I shall never watch my own child grow up?

It was too difficult to think about, so she pushed the thought away. The Duke might have awakened the dream of love and motherhood in her, but that didn’t mean those needed to remain her only dreams. She could find new ones, and she would. At least I’m not a spinster , she reminded herself. I am a wealthy, powerful duchess. And I will forge my own path and teach my nieces and nephews that it is possible to be happy alone.

Soon, the clock struck ten, and Emery and Georgina looked at one another: it was time. The carriage to take them to the ceremony would be arriving in just a few short minutes.

“Let’s go and get you married, then,” Emery said, standing and taking Georgina’s hands and helping her to her feet. “No more of my melancholy.”

They walked together down the stairs of Georgina’s father’s townhouse to where her parents were waiting in the entrance hall, still looking confounded that out of nowhere, their daughter was marrying a man they’d always assumed would marry her friend. Two carriages were waiting outside, and Emery helped Georgina into the second one. She then joined her inside, and, after a moment, the carriage rattled off, toward the church.

“Are you nervous?” Emery asked, taking Georgina’s hand.

“No,” Georgina said, and she didn’t look it, either. She was radiating with happiness. Emery felt a small flicker of envy; she had been very nervous on her wedding day. But she said nothing, of course.

“Are you nervous?” Georgina asked suddenly. “To see the Duke at the wedding?”

“Oh! I hadn’t thought about it,” Emery lied. “But no, I’m sure that everything will be fine.”

Her stomach, however, churned at the thought of having to face her husband. She hadn’t seen him in days--ever since she had moved out of his room. But she steeled herself. It won’t be such a terrible thing. Perhaps we can begin to work toward having a cordial relationship, if not a loving one.

But her hands were sweating for the rest of the carriage ride, and she felt as if she might be sick.

When the carriage finally stopped in front of the church, the footman helped Emery down, then Georgina. In the bright morning light, Georgina looked absolutely radiant, and Emery’s heart swelled with love for her friend.

“You look beautiful,” she whispered, taking her hand.

“It’s the brandy,” Georgina whispered back, and they both laughed. Emery then walked her friend up to the church and through the main foyer, where Georgina’s father was waiting for her to take her down the aisle.

Also waiting at the entrance to the main part of the church, looking achingly handsome in black, was the Duke of Dredford.

She looked so beautiful that Lucien thought his heart might stop right then and there. She was wearing a light blue gossamer dress that brought out the blue of her eyes, and her black hair was stacked in a neat and simple coiffure on top of her head that he felt perfectly allowed her friend--whose hair, befitting a bride, was much more elaborate--to take center stage.

Emery is always thoughtful like that. She will also make sure it is Leah shining when Leah finally marries.

The thought only caused him more pain; memories of what a thoughtful person his wife was were not helpful for getting him through this already very difficult experience.

“Lucien,” Emery murmured, as she walked slowly up to him, her hand falling to her side as she released Miss Holloway’s hand to approach him. “What are you doing here?”

“What do you mean?” he asked, tilting his head to one side. “This is my brother’s wedding.”

“I know,” she said, her tone just slightly tinged with annoyance. “I meant, what are you doing out here with the bride’s father? Shouldn’t you be inside with your brother at the altar?”

“I was waiting for you,” Lucien said simply. “It wouldn’t do for us to enter separately, seeing as how we are the highest-ranking people at this wedding; apart from the Archbishop, of course. We will also be required to stand at the front of the church with my brother. Considering the rapidity of this wedding and the whispers of scandal that always accompany a special license, we must show our full and unified support of the match by taking center stage.”

“Ahh. That makes sense.” She looked around at Miss Holloway, who nodded at her in an encouraging kind of way, and then she looked back at Lucien. “Alright then.”

His heart in his throat, he offered Emery his arm, and she took it--albeit a little stiffly.

“I’ll see you down there,” Emery said over her shoulder to Miss Holloway. “Good luck.”

Lucien then steered Emery through the doors of the church and down the aisle. It was a surreal moment for him, leading her down an aisle at a wedding; it reminded her of their own rushed, surreal wedding. He wondered if she was thinking the same thing; she was certainly walking in a stiff, unnatural manner, as if unsure how to conduct herself in his presence.

He didn’t blame her; he felt as if he couldn’t move naturally, either. It felt both wonderful and exceedingly painful to have her on his arm like this, as if they were still a properly married couple, and not an estranged husband and wife. He wanted to say something to her, but he was completely tongue-tied--not to mention the fact that he couldn’t exactly strike up conversation when they were in the middle of walking down the aisle at his brother’s wedding.

Lucien looked up to see Henry standing at the end of the aisle, beaming at them both. As they reached him, he shook Lucien’s hand and murmured, “Thank you, brother, for all your support. This is truly the best day of my life.”

“I’m very glad,” Lucien muttered back. “I believe you and Miss Holloway will be very happy.”

Out of the corner of his eye, Lucien saw his wife glance at him, a look of surprise on her face, but by the time he looked at her, she had looked away.

They took their seats in the front row, and seconds later, the music began. The doors in the back of the church opened, and Miss Holloway entered on her father’s arm. Everyone in the church stood and turned to look at her. Lucien, however, kept his eyes fixed on his brother. The look on his brother’s face was like nothing he had ever seen in his life; it was pure joy, but more than that, as well; his brother looked proud.

He takes pride in having such a woman as his bride , he realized, turning to look at Miss Holloway. She wore a similar look on her face, and her eyes were fastened on Henry’s.

They are going to make each other better, he thought to himself. Henry might be young and still immature, sometimes even irresponsible, but with a wife that gives him so much pride and believes in him so much, he will become a better person.

It had always seemed to him that marriage was something one only did when one had already become the best version of one’s self. He had thought he would only marry once he was the best Duke of Dredford possible and had fixed everything his parents had done wrong. But perhaps it was possible that a man didn't become his best self until he had a good woman by his side to show him how.

Emery is what has changed.

She was the one who made him better.

Miss Holloway reached the top of the aisle, the ceremony began, and Lucien stopped thinking about his marriage to Emery as he immersed himself fully in what he knew was the best moment of his brother’s life.

It took everything in Lucien to hold in the emotion that had mounted inside of him as he stood next to Emery outside of the church, shortly after the ceremony ended. They were seeing off the bride and groom, who would travel to Lucien’s townhouse for the wedding breakfast, followed by the rest of them. He wanted to cry, but he hadn’t cried since before his parents had died, and he wasn’t about to start now. Next to him, Emery was waving a handkerchief, smiling at the carriage containing Henry and Miss Holloway--or Lady Henry Grove, as she was now called. It was torture for Lucien not to take her free hand.

The entire ceremony had been torture. All he had wanted throughout it was to touch her. His hand had buzzed with the need to reach out and take hers, but of course, he resisted. He didn’t know how she would take it, and anyway, he still felt so confused and torn up inside that he didn’t want to give her any false hope.

The carriage holding the newlyweds rounded the corner, and Emery put down her handkerchief.

“Shall we return to our carriage?” he asked her, and she glanced at him in surprise.

“I shall be riding with the girls,” she said. “I already promised them I would go with them.”

“Oh, of course.” Lucien’s heart sank. She is already avoiding me again . “Very well.”

They had taken two carriages that morning after Emery had gone to the Holloways’ house to help her friend prepare; the girls had gone in one, while Lucien and Henry had gone in the other. Therefore he fully expected to be alone in the carriage back to the house, and he was surprised when, after he’d closed the carriage door, it opened again, and Leah joined him inside.

“Oh, hello,” he said, surprised and even a little miffed that he wouldn’t get the ride to be alone with his melancholy thoughts. It was hard having to pretend to be in a celebratory mood around all the guests, and this carriage ride was going to be his one chance to feel all his disappointment and regret.

“I’m riding with you,” Leah said, a tad unnecessarily. She fixed him with a beady stare. “And you’re going to tell me exactly what is going on with you and Emery.”