It’s Mother-Pucking Christmas!

16. Ryder

16

RYDER

“ S omehow,” Coach Kowalski said at the end of practice, “this is the best I’ve ever seen you play.”

“Thanks. I—”

“Don’t overdo it!” the man bellowed, making me squint. “I need you to peak this weekend. Utah!”

Rick pretended to hide behind Mike.

“Don’t let him overdo it. I am not losing this game, you understand me, son?”

Rick saluted.

“Now get off my ice.”

“Yessir.”

I was itching to text Dakota back or, better yet, call her or, even better, see her. I wanted her in my arms. Forever.

“No!” Rick barked as I stripped off the sweaty jersey.

“I wasn’t going to do anything.”

“You blew your text message load last night. At least wait until after lunch to text her.”

“And text her something light and funny,” Mike added. “Not a link to an article like you did that one time.”

“It was a good article, okay?” I protested as the guys turned on me.

“If you actually like this girl and don’t want to blow it, you’ll do what we say,” Mike warned.

“I do. I am. I really want this to work.”

I was setting a timer on my phone for when it was acceptable to text Dakota as I headed out of the locker room, keys in hand.

“You hungry, Boy Scout?”

I glanced up to see her there, inexplicably, like she’d stepped out of my daydreams, standing in the lobby. The morning sun streaming through the windows lit her up like an angel. She was holding a basket, bouncing it in her hands against her leg. Dakota was wearing a green coat with big brass buttons, tights, and brown boots. She looked like she belonged on a Christmas card or a movie poster.

Or in my bed, naked against that dark-green coat.

I shook my head. “It’s you!” I loped up to her.

I didn’t let her say hello before I was kissing her, having the opposite effect of chasing out the image of her in my bed.

“I had to threaten to mace your security guard,” Dakota admitted when I leaned back. “Guess he believes me now that we’re dating.”

I grinned against her mouth. I couldn’t help it. I scooped her up and kissed her while she huffed a laugh against my mouth.

“Dating. We’re dating! Going steady.” I kissed her again.

“Oh my god.” She swatted me playfully. “You’re like some 50s movie hero or something. Going steady. I don’t think even my grandmother says that.”

“Fun fact about the term ‘going steady’: today people think it’s prudish, but back then it was scandalous,” I told her. “Young women were encouraged to date around and not pick one boy to go steady with because people thought if they were going steady that meant they were more comfortable to… because they were having... well…”

“Going steady meant they were fucking.” Dakota grinned, leaning forward. “Fucking in the back seat of a Pontiac Catalina.” She rested her chin against my chest so she could give me that smile that made my heart melt. “Is this you subtly saying you want to break your third date rule?” she whispered to me.

I kissed her just so my mouth wouldn’t betray me and say yes. “There’s a great article on it, is all.”

Her eyebrows lifted.

“Oh, heck, no. No articles.” I slapped my forehead with the palm of my hand.

“What? Send it to me. That sounds really interesting,” Dakota said, grabbing my wrist.

“Really?” I peered at her.

“Yeah. I like long-form articles. My cousin and I trade links all the time. She sent me a real crazy one about the British royal family’s Christmas traditions. They weigh themselves before and after the holiday week.” She took my hands. “My mom’s going to kill me if I ask you this, but do you want to go on date number three?”

“She doesn’t like me?” I forced out, taken aback.

“No, she loves you,” Dakota said quickly. “She just thought I shouldn’t be asking you out since I technically asked the last two times.”

“Or maybe you have an ulterior motive and want to get to the grand finale of date number three.” I wrapped my arms around her, marveling at how perfectly she fit against me.

“It’s not ulterior if I’m basically wearing a sign to that effect.”

I kissed her, couldn’t stop kissing her. “I’m going to take you out somewhere soon, but I haven’t planned it yet,” I admitted. “I want to do something special for you, something wonderful.”

“Don’t. You don’t have to for me.” There was an odd look in her eyes.

I cupped her face. “I do. Because you’re worth it. You deserve to have a man in your life who worships you.”

There was that odd look again.

Maybe that was too much, actually. Yeah, worship was on Rick’s no-no word list.

I should back off.

“I don’t think I can get the date together today though,” I said, readjusting the red knit hat on her head.

“Got five pounds of chicken to eat?”

I grinned because I’d already eaten it that morning. “No, I’m volunteering.”

“More shirtless puppy holding?”

“It’s actually at the senior living center.”

“Don’t get enough love from the girls hanging out outside the locker room?” Dakota teased. “Now you need old women on your list of adoring fans?”

I laced our fingers together, took the basket from her, and couldn’t stop staring at her as we walked slowly to my car. “The old women like to touch my muscles,” I teased Dakota. “They’re very appreciative.”

“And you won’t even let me feel you up,” she said with fake outrage. “Damn.”

Laughing as we approached her car, I slowed down, not wanting to let her go just yet. “They’re actually pretty lonely, most of them. Especially around the holidays. Some of them, their kids moved away, or they never had them, or their friends or spouses all passed away. I know how much it blows to be alone and forgotten on the holidays.”

Dakota gazed up at me. Then she leaned up and kissed me softly.

“You’re a really good person, you know that?” She squeezed my hand then kept walking past her car.

“What are you—”

“I’m coming with you,” she said.

“To volunteering?” I squinted in the bright sun.

“Sure!”

“Don’t you have—”

“What? Something better to do? You met my family. I’m not going to be trapped in a house with them all day.”

“Take off your shirt!” Several elderly women cackled when I walked into the senior living center, Dakota beside me.

Another woman snorted awake. “Is it Saturday already? My glasses. Myrtle, wake up. Where are my glasses?”

“Good afternoon, everyone. How are you all on this beautiful winter day?” I said, greeting them.

“Fuck the weather,” Myrtle said, peering at Dakota. “Who’s the broad?”

“Did you finally get a girlfriend?” Betty asked loudly.

“Maybe she’s lost.” Donna cackled.

“I can get a girlfriend,” I sputtered while Dakota laughed behind her hand.

“Ryder, you’re the very definition of ‘God does not give with both hands.’” Another elderly woman hobbled by on a walker. “Pretty but dumb as a box of rocks.”

“He’s not stupid, Edna,” Charles said from where he was slowly burning papers in the fireplace. “Just socially inept.”

“Body like that? I think I can overlook it.” Dakota squeezed my hand, laughter dancing in her eyes.

“Did you pay her to come here?” Mildred demanded.

“Oh no, we’re definitely dating.” Dakota reached up and kissed me right on the mouth. “And he’s the best boyfriend I’ve ever had.”

There were more shocked intakes of breath.

“Well, I’ll be damned.”

“Thought I’d die before I saw him manage to do more than say thank you to a woman.”

“Now just go easy on him!”

“Come over here, Ryder.” Edna grabbed his wrist. “You go help Frank off the toilet. He’s been in there for an hour. Says he’s fine, but I think he’s stuck.”

“I’m just trying to get away from you, Edna!” the old man yelled when I nudged the door open.

“You’re coming with us, girlfriend.” Mildred and Myrtle both grabbed one of Dakota’s arms and hauled her off.

I worried Dakota would be overwhelmed, but since she was used to a certain level of family chaos, she just plopped down in the middle of the room, the seniors crowding around her, grilling her on her name, her family, her job, how many kids she wanted, and she didn’t have any exes floating around, did she? Because they weren’t sure I could fight.

“I can fight. I’m a hockey player,” I reminded the seniors.

“We’ve never seen you fight.” Horace, a Korean War vet and still spry enough to actually take me in a fight, piped up. “We watch you on the television when your games are on, and I’ve never seen you so much as shove anyone.”

“That’s not—”

“Give him some pointers, Horace,” Mildred insisted. “Now.” She turned back to Dakota. “Do you have any dick pics on that phone that you want to share with a sister?”

“She doesn’t need dick pics. She’s got the real deal.” Jean swiped out with her cane. “I swear she starts sundowning earlier and earlier.”

“How is he in bed, dear?” Myrtle asked Dakota. “We’ve tried to give him tips, but I think they just go over his lovely head.”

“I told him there’s only so much staring into those blue eyes a woman wants to do.” Frances bullied her way into the pack of curious seniors.

“Oh, those eyes can get him pretty far.” Dakota smirked at me.

“I hope he doesn’t just know one move,” Edna declared. “That was always the problem I had with the good-looking ones—they could go in, they could go out, but it’s like you took off your panties and they forgot their tongue worked.”

Mildred nodded. “I’m not waxing for a five-minute quickie.”

“Especially not after you have to sit through an excruciatingly long dinner with them,” Frances said.

“I think I got it, guys,” I called.

“Does he got it?”

“He doesn’t even swear.”

“What does he say when he, you know, scores a goal?”

“Well, we haven’t gotten that far,” Dakota admitted.

There were more offended noises.

“You gotta seal the deal,” several elderly men said to me, grabbing my arms. “Your body is your most valuable asset. Lead with your strength.”

Her friend shook her head. “That’s some Ohio rizz right there.”

“It’s what?” I asked, confused.

“It means it’s not sigma. You gotta keep up with the times. Keeps you young.”

“They spend all day on TikTok,” I told Dakota as a dog-eared copy of a 1970s book about the carnal pleasures was forced in my hands. “Just ignore them.”