Knot Broken (Hiddenverse)

34. Rafe

CHAPTER 34

Rafe

My body is buzzing. I’m pretty sure there is a stupid grin on my face that I can’t wipe away. Lilah still hasn’t reappeared, but I can smell her on me. Her pheromones are like a drug. And they are embedded in my clothing.

Hailey approaches, looking as if she’s trying to play the meek omega. Once she’s close, she sniffs, a look of distaste crossing her features before it’s gone.

“Rafe, can we talk?” she asks softly.

The cameras and boom are further away, focusing on Chad and Miles at the moment. So I lift an eyebrow and give her a bored look. “About?”

She sucks in a breath. “—Us.”

“Hailey, there is no us .”

“I know. I messed it all up. I was stupid. It took coming on this show to prove that to myself. I got scared, Rafe. What we had…it was—” She looks around, searching for a word. “Intense.”

My heart gives a dull thump, and I stare at her. I’m not sure if this is another one of her games, but I’m not playing. This show has done the opposite for me. It has shown me that what Hailey and I had—it was nothing compared to the real thing. To what Lilah makes me feel, even in such a short time.

“You sold my secrets to the pap because you felt too much?” I say dryly. I guess there’s one thing that can wipe the smile away. Hailey.

“Yes—No—I don’t know. Rafe, that’s what I’m saying. It was intense. And your pack, they didn’t like me then either. It was so much. How was I supposed to be with you if your pack didn’t want me? I don’t care now. I want you.” She lays her hand on my forearm, and it feels like a million fire ants are crawling over my skin.

“That isn’t how this works.”

“I don’t care. Don’t you get it? I’m sorry for the crappy shit I did. I love you,” she says. Her nails dig into my arm as if she can inject the words into my bloodstream.

I lay my hand over hers to remove her touch, and she tightens her hold. She leans into me and presses her lips to mine. Attempting to shove her tongue into my mouth. I’m so stunned I don’t move for a second. Then I’m disengaging, pushing her away and stepping back as her nails drag over my flesh, leaving their mark.

But all I can see is Lilah, her mouth slightly parted watching us. Hurt flashes in the depths of her eyes. My heart beats double time, blood racing through my veins and making me lightheaded. My breath lodges inside my lungs, and I take a step toward her, just as Turner Clark slides the glass double doors open and announces for the omegas to gather in the ceremony room while we go to deliberations.

“Lilah, wait,” I say, attempting to follow her as she spins on her heel and heads back into the house.

“The time for talking is over,” Turner says, and I want to punch him .

“It will just be a second.”

He shrugs. “Rules are rules.”

Miles comes up next to me, looking between Turner and me. “What’s wrong?”

“I need to talk to Lilah,” I bite out. Not that it’s Miles' fault that Hailey kissed me and I didn't react fast enough to push her away.

“It will have to wait,” Turner says, blocking my way again when I try to go around him.

I let out a warning growl, and he just lifts an eyebrow.

“The faster this is done, the faster you can have your chat,” he suggests.

Miles drops his arm over my shoulder, holding me back before I even know I’m going to lunge at the guy. His smug ass face needs to be punched for sure. “It isn’t worth it, Rafe. Come on. He’s right.”

I let Miles lead me toward the deliberation room. The photos of Lilah, Ben, Tyler, Chad, Tamika, Willow, Hailey, and Blair line up in two rows of four. I am drawn to Lilah’s, in the white dress she wore the first day. Her hair in loose waves. Pink lips and blue eyes. There’s a sadness deep inside her eyes I didn’t see at first. But I see it now. It’s where her walls come from. The pain caused to her by a different alpha. I’m no better. Obviously.

Turner follows us in, and Elliott joins us shortly after. The cameras are already set up to capture every breath we take in this small room.

“We are going to keep Lilah, Chad, Willow, Tamika, and Tyler,” I say, glancing at Turner. “Ben and Blair can’t handle our musks. Hailey needs to go. I don’t care about the show or what will make for good TV, you are messing with my future keeping her here.”

He grasps his hands behind his back and tilts his head to the side, studying me. “As Thomas already stated, Hailey stays until three.”

“No!” I growl. “It’s giving her false hope.”

Turner narrows his eyes on me. “False hope? This show is all about false hope. What did you think you were signing up for?”

Elliott clears his throat and steps forward. “We signed up to find our match.”

Turner chuckles. “And how many packs and their chosen omega are still together now from previous shows? Two? Out of twenty seasons…that isn’t very good odds. Just play out the show, none of it matters too much in the grand scheme of things. If you find your match and it works out, that’s great, but this show is clearly for entertainment purposes only.”

My stomach bottoms out, and Miles reaches out and squeezes Elliott’s shoulder. Turner is only saying everything I tried to say from the beginning. But now that my scent match is in that ceremony room, it changes everything.

“Scent matches are rare and fragile at first. She can reject us,” I say. “We have to send Hailey home.”

“Someone get Thomas—” Turner barks out, clearly impatient with me and my demands.

I feel so helpless, and that’s not a normal feeling for me. And looking at my pack mates, I’m sure they feel the same.

Thomas strolls into the room—like a bomb isn’t ticking ready to blow—and moves to stand next to Turner. “What’s the problem?”

“They want to send Hailey home,” Turner clips out, rolling his eyes for good measure.

“This again? I thought we had it settled last time.” Thomas turns his attention to the three of us. “It’s the perfumes and musks, isn’t it? It always throws a wrench in things. ”

“I’m starting to think you aren’t listening to us. We’ve stated over and over—from the start—that we wanted her gone,” I say, tugging my fingers through my hair. The image of Lilah’s hurt expression playing over and over inside my head like my own personal torture.

“I assure you we are aware of your opinion.”

My jaw works, and he’s lucky that Miles and Elliott are between us. Turning away, I prowl to the door, ready to walk right out. The idea of finding Lilah and throwing her over my shoulder caveman style and being done with this whole show is beyond tempting.

As it is, my stomach is churning, and I feel like I’m losing something precious because of this.

“Remind us what happens if we break contract,” Miles says. How is he so calm?

“You will be responsible for the loss of revenue, which at this point equates to just over ten million—each. You will also be paying for all ads that were scheduled as well as the losses they will incur, per our agreements with them.” He shrugs and clasps his hands together. “And if you continue a relationship with any of the contestants, you and your ensuing relationship will also be dragged through the tabloids. But that isn’t it, with the non-compete clause, Rafe will be unable to act for ten years. Not to mention the possibility of other things.”

I gulp down a breath of air. He’s so nonchalant as he lists the terms of our agreement. Did I sign that? Fuck . I don’t remember any of that, but it has to be true. He wouldn’t threaten all of that if it wasn’t. Right? It’s like a trap, they’ve boxed us in and forced our hands. The show’s going to try to ruin our lives.

“We get it,” I say, defeat weighing my shoulders down. Either way this show can destroy what we have, but at least continuing on won’t also destroy Lilah’s life. “Hailey stays. ”

Even her name on my lips is bitter. But it can’t be helped. Maybe I had the right idea at first. Staying away from Lilah and not making my feelings known would have been better for her and me.