Lost in Me (Lost Duet #1)

Chapter Twenty

Jesse

I slowly make my way up the stairs and down the narrow hallway. I walk out of the open front door and make my way to the porch, resting my arms on the railing as I look out at the property. So much land here. The house is positioned in the middle of the woods. Even if Shawn and his men are looking for Emory, it will take them a while to figure out where we are.

And even when he does find her, the woman he loved is gone and is replaced with my Dove. Even though she has changed, the girl she was once is still there. I saw it in her eyes. I saw how the fear and defeat started taking her over, validating that I am, in fact, winning. She doesn’t want me to see it, but it is clear.

Shawn’s Angel will be dead soon, and the only thing left in her place will be a woman he doesn’t recognize. He will fucking shatter when she doesn’t respond to him. When she won’t even look at him. He will try so fucking hard to get her to leave, but she will refuse. She will stay with me because I am the only one who truly loves her. I am the only one that knows the real her.

She thinks she is strong enough to fight me. She fucking thinks she won’t submit to me, but she will. She always has and always will. It is who she is. It is who I have made her.

I want Shawn to find us. I want him to see what I have done to her. I want to see him fucking break and shatter in front of me. I need to see. I need him to feel what I have felt every fucking day since I got sent to prison.

I could have moved on. I could have just done my time, got out, and started a new life, but why the fuck would I do that when this is the life I want? This is the life that was made for me. She was made for me. We still fit together like a perfect puzzle, and once I get rid of the problem inside her, I can replace it with our child—with my seed—and my name will continue, as will the life I have created.

My son and their sons will make fucking sure that what I have created here will live on long after Emory and I are dead. She should be proud to be mine. She should be proud to be a part of something so fucking important. The outside world doesn’t understand what I am trying to create, but soon they will see. They will see that they made me this way, and they will have to live with that for the rest of their lives.

Prison turned me into this and gave me the tools I needed. That is, after all, what they wanted. They couldn’t honestly fucking believe that sending a man like me to prison would change me into a productive member of society, and if they believed that, they are now regretting ever fucking letting me out.

I have been watching the news and listening to the scanners. They have found the dead bodies. They are all looking for me, but they will never find us here. I made sure of that. There are so many traps set up in the woods. I will be surprised if Shawn and his men will be able to make it through them alive, and if they do, they will wish they never did.

I take a deep breath as I watch the sun start to go down. Soon the blackness of night will consume everything, and it will be time for round two with Emory, and what I have planned will feel so fucking good.

It is time she remembers what it feels like to be on her knees for me. It is time she remembers what it feels like to please me however I see fit. It is time she truly realizes that she is never escaping this place or me.

Her hope and prayers for getting saved will go nowhere. Shawn will not be able to protect her from me anymore. He is a nobody. Nothing but a fucking fly in my face that will soon be destroyed. I didn’t mean to beat her the way I did, but when she screamed his name, I lost my fucking shit. She knew what I would do, but she did it anyway. She needs to fucking forget about Shawn and whatever fucking lies he told her.

I slowly back away from the railing and turn around, heading back inside. I head back to my room and go to my bed. The sweatpants I plan on wearing are already laid out. I have everything planned, and if that plan doesn’t work, I have more. The plans I have inside my head are fucking endless.

I take a deep breath, pull off my boots, unbutton my pants, and pull them down along with my boxers. Boxers just get in the fucking way. I pull off my shirt, grab the sweatpants from the bed, and pull them up. I turn around and look at myself in the mirror, seeing Emory’s name tattooed across my chest. I have more, but that is the one that means the most to me. The one that reminds me what I will continue to fight for. Even in death, I will fucking haunt her and search for her. There is no fucking escape for her, and soon she will not want to escape. Soon she will just fucking accept my love and accept me. Soon, I will get the reward I deserve for all my hard work.

I look down at my arms and see the fresh scratches she made on me. I love the fucking pain and pleasure I get from her, and soon she will enjoy it too. She is suffering now, but once she gives in to me, everything will be better. She will see I will treat her right. I will love her in a way Shawn never could and never will.

She thinks she loves him and wants him, but I know deep down inside she remembers what she and I had. I will fucking remind her of our long history. A history that doesn’t just go away because she wants it to. She can’t escape what we have or my love for her. She has tried and failed.

I am fucking everywhere. I consume her mind, her thoughts, her emotions, and now her body.

She said no, but I know her body was telling me yes. I felt the way her body responded as I touched her heat, when I entered her. She wanted to fight me, but her body betrayed her, revalidating that one day her mind and heart would want me just like her body wanted me.

I will not let up. I will not fucking back down until she submits, and she is closer than she thinks. She is so fucking close, I just need a little more time. I just need to push her a little more, and then she will be mine forever, and we can forget about the last twelve years and move on. Make a life together. Can’t she fucking see that is all I want?

I don’t want to hurt her, but she fucking pushes me. Pushes me to the point where I can’t fucking control how I react. If she stops pushing, I will stop hurting her. It is that simple. She remembers the rules. She knows what I want from her. She is choosing to take the hard road.

I know for a fact my Dove is still in there, and I am not going to stop until I see her come out again. I am not going to stop until she remembers what it is like to be loved by me.