Merry Little Hate Notes

Chapter Twenty-Seven

HOLLY

“LET’S JUST STAY OUT HERE,” I whispered against Brandon’s lips while we made out in his car. I glanced at his parents’ house, which was tastefully lit up with twinkling white lights and boughs of evergreen draped along the wraparound porch. It was a miracle we’d even made it. Apparently, we were trying to make up for fourteen years of lost time in one night. Fine by me. My foot was happy to pop as many times as necessary.

“I want to.” He tugged my lower lip gently with his teeth. “But my wingman would kill me.”

I laughed. “I still can’t believe your mom is your wingman.”

“Speaking of moms, how are you feeling about seeing yours?”

I rested my hands on Brandon’s stubbled cheeks and nuzzled my nose against his. His concern touched me. “I don’t know. It’s almost surreal. Kind of like being here with you, minus all the kissing and touching.”

Brandon chuckled.

To be honest, I hadn’t really had time to process it. At the time, I’d been more concerned about how Brandon was feeling about visiting Christian’s grave, and knowing what he was going to say to me. Don’t get me wrong, seeing my mom freaked me out. But I knew only time would tell how my relationship with her would play out. We had a lot of things to work through. It’s one thing for a teenage boy to leave you. It’s another when it’s your mother. That was probably going to require some therapy.

I tilted my head to the side and peeked at our old house. I’d glanced at it on the drive in, but I knew I needed to face it for real. So many of my best memories, as well as my worst, lived there.

Brandon took my hands from his cheek and held them between his own. “The place hasn’t changed much, has it?”

“No. It hasn’t. It still looks like it holds some magic.”

“I don’t think it was ever the house.” Brandon kissed me. “I think it was the people.”

“Are you saying I’m magical?”

“Very,” he groaned before kissing me deeply this time.

Breathing as one with Brandon as our lips danced together was more than magical. It was everything I’d remembered it to be, but better. His soft lips melded perfectly with mine, and his tongue skillfully stroked the inside of my mouth, eliciting all the feels. I loved how his hands caressed my cheeks before he kissed his way over to my ear and whispered things that made me blush and giggle. It was the best birthday ever.

“We really should go in,” Brandon said low into my ear.

“I suppose we should. I’m nervous to see everyone,” I admitted.

“Don’t be. Everyone loves you.”

“Do you think our old neighbors will think it’s weird we’re together?”

“Nah, I think everyone but us expected it to happen.”

“Maybe you’re right.” Even my mom and dad had thought so. “Just stay close.” He was my emotional support person for the night, seeing as Carmen was here with Marco. He’d parked his motor home down the street. The Garcias were probably losing their minds right about now. Carmen’s abuelas would probably fly in tomorrow once they got word of the yoga instructor.

“You don’t have to tell me twice. Although, watch out for my mom—she might try to strong-arm you away from me, and she scares me, so I won’t fight back,” Brandon gave me fair warning.

I laughed while Brandon jumped out of the car and jogged around to open my door. I ran my fingers through my hair, trying to get it plumped up after being in a beanie. Although Brandon had probably done a sufficient job with how often his hands had tangled in my hair while we kissed. I couldn’t wait to get back to that, but it would be poor form not to go to the party. Especially since Lauren had said it was all she wanted for Christmas. And I was curious to see how the Garcias were holding up.

Brandon opened the door and held out his hand. “You look gorgeous.”

“Are you sure I don’t have resting Grinch face or a November face?” I teased him.

He let out an exasperated breath. “You heard the TED Talk. You know why I said those things.”

I extended my hand as he assisted me into the frigid night air. “I know, and thanks for speaking my love language.”

“I was just desperate for you to speak to me at all, after what I had done.”

“Well, it worked.”

“For that, we have my wingman to thank.”

Believe me, I would thank Lauren Cassidy for the rest of my life. But first, I took a moment to stare at the Cassidys’ house. I’d always loved it, especially the wraparound porch. I had to remind myself that despite all the good—and even the terrible—memories that had happened there, it was the people inside who mattered. They were the magic. So was the man who held my hand and loved me.

Brandon led us up the snow-shoveled path lined with glowing lanterns and holly. It was festive and beautiful and reminded me of belonging and home.

We paused at the door, and Brandon gave me a devious grin. “Are you ready for this?”

“Is there something you want to tell me?”

“Just that I love you.”

He was the cheesiest, and I loved it.

Brandon threw open the door before I could respond. A huge chorus of “Surprise!” greeted us before we even entered the foyer .

I was certainly surprised. A sea of people, like an immense wave, moved toward me. Lauren, of course, led the charge, pushing her son out of the way. “Happy birthday, Holly, our darling girl.” She pulled me into the house and wrapped me up tight.

It was then I realized she had a whole Julia-Roberts-from-the-nineties vibe going, with her baggy jeans and long, chunky cardigan. In fact, everyone was dressed like the nineties had come calling and wanted its Doc Martens and plaid skirts back.

Carmen pushed her way to the front, dressed like she’d stepped straight out of the movie Clueless in her yellow plaid outfit. I felt clueless, like I’d missed the memo about what to wear to the party. I thought I was being semi chic in my long red sports coat over a black turtleneck and body-hugging jeans. The turtleneck and jeans were from Costco, thank you very much.

“We thought it would be so fun to have everyone come dressed from the decade you were born,” Lauren clued me in.

I didn’t know what to say. I’d never had a surprise party before, much less a nineties-themed one. “Wow. Thank you.” My emotions were running high—it had been quite the night already. It got even more emotional when I spotted my dad in the crowd among old friends and neighbors, giving me a knowing smile that said, See? Magic still exists. Seeing him there and healthy was the most magical. It meant a lot to me that he would bravely come, knowing almost every person in the room had seen him fall from the highest heights. Yet no one seemed to shun him. As far as I could tell, they were happy to see us.

“We love you, beautiful girl.” Lauren gave me one more squeeze before taking my hand and leading me through the crowd as if I were on display. I supposed I was. So many old friends and neighbors offered me birthday wishes along the way. Even some kids I used to babysit—all grown up now—were in attendance. Brandon and Carmen faithfully followed us to the main area of the house where the kitchen and large great room were located. Lauren had gone all out on the birthday decorations. Gorgeous LED balloons and white roses accented her evergreen-and-gold Christmas decorations. The place glowed, making me feel as if I were in a fairy-tale dream .

Dad made his way to us and pulled out a crown made of holly from behind him. “To the girl, now a woman, who has brought me peace and refuge.” He placed the crown on my head like I was sixteen again. “I love you, dear daughter. Happy birthday.”

“I love you, Dad,” I could barely say for being so choked up.

“That’s just precious,” Lauren exclaimed. “Bring out the cake, Bertram. Let’s sing ‘Happy Birthday’ to our favorite girl.”

Bertram appeared, carrying a large cake lit with thirty sparkling candles on a wooden pedestal. The cake was gorgeously decorated with raspberries, currants, cinnamon sticks, and rosemary. I knew instantly it was one of my dad’s creations. He hadn’t made me such a cake in years.

Brandon took my hand as the crowd began to sing “Happy Birthday.”

The crowd parted and gave way for Bertram to stand in front of me with the blazing cake. The heat of the candles made me feel almost as warm as the company I was in. As soon as the crowd finished singing, Brandon whispered in my ear, “Make a wish.”

I looked around at every person beaming at me and realized my wish had already come true. There was no doubt magic existed. As scary as it might sometimes be, it’s what made life worth living.

“Help me blow out the candles,” I implored Brandon. “Let’s wish together.”

Brandon kissed my cheek before we huffed and puffed and blew all the candles out. The cheers and applause were almost deafening. They got even louder when Brandon’s lips landed on mine for a soul-stirring kiss, leaving no doubt in my—or anyone else’s—mind that we were a couple.

“I love you, Holly,” he spoke against my lips.

Before I could tell him how much I loved him, I found myself being swept away into the crowd by Carmen, who apparently could wait no longer for me to see her parents cringing in the corner while Marco expressed his light and love for them and all people. I should also mention Marco was wearing overalls with one half of the bib down and no shirt. It put all the tattoos on his arms and chest on display.

“Isn’t this the best?” Carmen giggled near my side .

“You’re evil,” I teased her.

“One day, I’m going to settle down with some man I’m sure will thrill my parents, but I want it to be when the time is right.”

“Huh.”

“Don’t look so surprised.” She swatted my arm. “Besides, we have to live our Monica and Rachel dreams first.”

“Yeah, we do. Apartment shopping next week?” I held out my little finger, making the ultimate pinkie promise.

She hooked her pinkie with mine and held on tightly. “I wouldn’t miss it. Happy birthday, Holly.”

I hugged her fiercely. “Thank you for sticking it out with me the last several years and not running scared from my charts.”

She squeezed me tight. “You know, those charts saved me a time or two.”

“Worrying is my superpower.”

“Nah, loving is.”

Oh. Wow. That was probably the greatest superpower anyone could have. “I love you, friend.”

“I know. Now go be with your man. I have to torture my parents just a little more.” She flitted off, leaving me to laugh at her.

Brandon wasted no time coming to my side. “Come with me.”

“Where are we going?”

“I want to give you your gifts.”

Ooh. This sounded good. “All right.” I grinned.

Brandon took my hand and weaved us in and out of all the guests until we made it outside on his parents’ deck. “How do you feel about breaking the law?”

“Uh. Is this a trick question?”

He flashed me a sexy grin. “I thought we could sneak onto the golf course.”

“Oh, you did?” I said in my best flirty voice.

“I always wanted you to come with us.”

“I don’t know if I have your and Christian’s luck. We’ll probably get caught if I go.”

Brandon pulled me closer. “Not tonight. I promise you’ll be safe.”

I 100 percent believed him. “Let’s go. ”

Brandon tugged on my hand, and we flew down the deck stairs. At the bottom of the stairs was a duffel bag and two blankets.

“Did you plan this?” I asked.

“For years.” He grabbed one of the blankets and wrapped it around my shoulders. “This will have to keep you warm for now.”

Oh, believe me, I was feeling heated already.

Like two thieves in the night, we stole across the Cassidys’ large backyard with several trees lit up by twinkling lights. They illuminated the snowy ground, making me feel like I was inside a snow globe. We walked through the back garden gate and out into what felt like the wild blue yonder.

A small creek divided the Cassidys’ house from the golf course. Thankfully, the creek had completely frozen over this time of year. I took a moment to look back at my old house. I wished I could tell the girl who used to live there that maybe life wouldn’t turn out how she planned, but it didn’t mean her dreams wouldn’t come true. Sometimes dreams just take a little longer and a little more work.

Brandon helped me across the frozen stream, holding on tightly and steadying me.

“I can’t believe we’re doing this.” I laughed.

“Me either.” He sounded as awestruck as I felt.

“Will it disappoint your mom that we left the party?” I wondered.

“Are you kidding me? This is the best gift we could give her. She helped me set it all up. She’s not half-bad as a wingman.”

“As long as she doesn’t make us do any more team-building exercises.”

“I think we’re safe.” Brandon chuckled.

I did feel safe. Very safe.

It didn’t take us long to traipse across the light layer of snow on the rolling golf course hills to reach our destination near a patch of stately pine trees. The snow on the tips of their branches made them look as if they’d been frosted with white buttercream.

“The trees should provide us with cover.” Brandon laid the second blanket out. It was one of those picnic blankets that prevented any moisture from seeping through. As soon as he was done, he helped me sit in the middle of it, where he joined me. I carefully took off my holly crown before wrapping the blanket around my shoulders across both of us. I shivered from the cold and anticipation.

Brandon drew me to him, and I crawled onto his lap. Things were getting real cozy. In no time, he had me warm enough that my shivering ceased.

I rested my head on his shoulder and took a moment to gaze at the twinkling stars and wispy white clouds against the blackened sky. It was the longest night of the year, and for that I was glad, as I never wanted it to end.

“It’s present time,” Brandon announced.

This was present enough for me, but I admit to being eager to see what he’d gotten me.

Brandon masterfully maneuvered us so he could keep me on his lap but still reach for the duffel bag. “First off, we have matching Christmas pajamas.”

I giggled as he pulled out two hooded fleece onesies patterned with Christmas trees. “Oh my gosh, where did you find those?”

“You have to look long and hard for adult pajamas that are this ridiculous, but you’re worth it.”

I reached out for both of them. As silly as they were, they were super soft. “Are you saying we should spend the night together?” I asked coyly.

“That’s exactly what I’m saying. Come Christmas Eve, we’re wearing these bad boys underneath the tree.”

Oh, baby. My Christmas dreams just came true.

“Up next, two-thirds of a stack of sticky notes.” Brandon pulled out a stack of only pink and orange sticky notes. It was obvious he’d taken the bright-blue ones for himself like he always had. “I can’t have you writing me notes on those merry little sticky notes anymore.”

I took them and sighed into his chest. He was the best boyfriend ever. “I can’t wait to use these.”

“Me too.” He kissed my head. “But just when you thought I couldn’t get any more romantic . . .” He pulled what looked like a rolled-up poster out of the bag.

“If you got me a Zac Efron poster, I might have to insist we elope right now. ”

“Well, damn. Why didn’t I think of that? I hope this doesn’t disappoint you.” I knew it wouldn’t, but he sounded awfully disappointed we wouldn’t be eloping. It got me to thinking. I knew I would marry Brandon someday, but first, I needed to live life out on my own—or you know, with Carmen. Obviously, he would still be my Chandler.

“It won’t disappoint me. I promise.”

“All right.” He unfurled the poster to reveal a star chart. But not just any star chart. Written in the corner was the most beautiful phrase. The day Holly came into my life.

“Brandon,” I cried, not having words to say how I felt. Other than, Let’s get married right now. But I knew that day would have to wait. “That’s way better than Zac Efron. Thank you.”

Brandon set the chart aside and adjusted me in his arms until our gazes met. “Holly, the day you came into my life changed it forever. I’m sorry it took me so long to be able to tell you. I felt like I had to choose between Christian and you. But that’s not an excuse for hurting you. I hope you can forgive me.”

My dad was right: Hate destroys. It had done enough damage to my life, and I wouldn’t let it take anything else. “I forgive you. Just promise me I won’t wake up tomorrow and find out that this was all a dare.”

“It is a dare. I’ve been daring myself to do this for years.”

Whoa. Did he know how to steal my breath away. “Well, if that’s the case, I dare you to kiss me now.”

“Done.”

Best. Birthday. Ever.