Not Just for Christmas

Chapter 35

Chapter Thirty-Five

T here was a bite to the air when Lewis stepped out of the hotel.

“We won’t go far,” he told Molly, who trotted along by his side. Partly, because it was freezing and partly because he wanted to get back to Erin. Not being able to get hold of her left a twinge of worry in his stomach, despite being fairly sure she was only in the shower. Or possibly taking a nap. They hadn’t got all that much sleep the previous nights.

Thinking of their nights together made him want to abandon the walk altogether and find her. But maybe he should give her some space and not crowd her.

He offered a smile to the middle-aged guy he passed, then turned off the main road towards the fields so Molly could properly stretch her legs.

No one was around and he felt his shoulders slowly relax as his body acclimatised to the temperature. After a couple of smaller lanes, they hopped a stile into a large field which glittered white with its blanket of snow.

“Don’t go far,” he told Molly, unclipping her lead. She didn’t seem like a dog who was going to cause him any trouble, but they were still getting used to each other and he could only really hope that she didn’t bolt. Chasing her through the countryside didn’t sound like his idea of fun.

She sniffed around the stone wall, then trotted a little way in front of him before turning to look back. He could have sworn she was just as concerned about losing him.

“I’m here,” he told her. “You can have a run around.”

She wagged her tail but maintained her distance a few metres in front of him.

The crisp air felt invigorating now, and it occurred to him that having a reason to get out of the hotel and take in some fresh air wasn’t a bad thing at all.

Which was exactly what his dad had thought. Maybe he’d been right. Maybe he’d keep Molly.

The thought came out of nowhere and he buried it again. It had never been that he didn’t want a dog, but that he didn’t think it was fair to the dog. Realistically, once the novelty wore off, Molly would probably end up lying around the hotel all day while Lewis was too caught up with work to remember to walk her.

They reached the stile at the far end of the field and Lewis glanced back. He could turn back and go and find Erin or continue into the next field.

For him, the choice would have been Erin, but Molly had already slipped through into the next field. Apparently, she was deciding.

“Fine,” he said, following her. “We’ll do a lap of this field and then head home.” Back to Erin.

It was a little crazy how attached he’d become to her in only a week. The thought of her going back to London felt like a boulder in his stomach, but he refused to dwell on it. He’d convince her to stay until the new year and then they’d figure out how to move their relationship forward from there.

He really wanted them to move forward. Which meant he was going to have to put his fears aside and tell her everything.

His phone buzzed in his pocket and he pulled it out to find Ivy’s name flashing on the screen.

“I’m walking Molly,” he said when he answered. “I told you I wouldn’t be long.”

“You need to get back here,” she said in a tone that made him stop dead.

Fear snaked around his spine. “What’s wrong?”

“Erin knows,” she said breathlessly. “She just got in a taxi. If you get back here now you can follow her and catch her at the train station.”

He was already walking back the way he’d come. Molly followed without needing to be told.

“What do you mean?” he asked Ivy, hoping he’d misunderstood.

“She knows about the money,” Ivy said, confirming his fear. “She knows everything and she’s upset.”

His brain whirred and his heart rate ramped up, but he couldn’t think of anything to say. “I’m on my way,” he muttered.

He strode at a fast pace all the way back to the hotel.

Ivy stood outside, waiting for him. “I’m sorry,” she said weakly.

“Did you tell her?” he shouted, directing all his anger and fear at her.

“No.” The sorrow in her eyes made it clear she was telling the truth. “I don’t know how she found out but she knows and I’m sorry.”

Overwhelmed by his emotions, he had nowhere to direct his anger but at her. “Why are you sorry if you had nothing to do with it?” he growled.

“Because she didn’t know before this morning. I really thought she knew, and was only after your money, but she wasn’t. ”

Forcefully, Lewis thrust Molly’s lead at Ivy. “Can you look after her?”

“Of course. I checked and the next train doesn’t leave for another half hour, so you should catch her.”

He checked his pocket for his car key and was about to walk away when he turned and glared at Ivy. “I didn’t even want it,” he said, his accusing tone illogical and unfair, but he couldn’t help it. The whole stupid situation infuriated him. “I didn’t want the money. I was perfectly happy and now I don’t even understand my life.”

“I know.” Tears glistened in Ivy’s eyes.

“Do you know what I want?” He threw his hands up and paced away from her. “I want to work from nine til five, Monday to Friday, and I want to walk my dog and hang out with my friends and family, and I want to go fishing again.” He didn’t even know where that had come from because he hadn’t been fishing in years and hadn’t even noticed he missed it until right then. “I don’t want this life,” he told her sadly as he felt her arms wrap around him.

“I know,” she said again, her voice so quiet.

He sank against her as exhaustion seemed to creep out from his bones and fill his entire body.

“I don’t understand why you didn’t just tell her yourself,” Ivy said when she released him.

“Because…” He stopped, not wanting to waste time having this conversation with Ivy. “I need to find Erin.”

“Yes,” Ivy agreed, following him to his car. “Once she’s got over the shock, and when you explain things properly, you’ll sort things out and everything will be fine.”

He gave her a grateful smile, then slid into the car, hoping he could get to the train station in time.

If not, he suspected he’d be driving all the way to London.