Pansies (Spires #4)

Chapter Twenty-Four

Chapter Twenty-Four

1 . Paragraph begins with: Alfie shifted uncomfortably. Accidentally rammed his foot…

Alexis: For people who like connection hunting in Spires, this is Angel, who Laurie meets briefly in For Real .

2 . Paragraph begins with: By Thursday he’d come to the conclusion…

Alexis: As I’ve stated in other places, I have complicated thoughts (I mean, I have complicated thoughts about what socks to wear in the morning) about third-act breakups. I know they can sort of feel more tropey than authentic, but I do believe they’re often necessary to confront the couple with an obstacle (to demonstrate they will overcome obstacles in the future) and for the individual characters to make decisions outside the relationship. Like here we see Alfie changing his life for himself and working to come to terms with expressing his identity, not just doing things and making changes because he wants to either prove himself to Fen or be with Fen.

3 . Paragraph begins with: “Oh my God!” Greg gazed at him entranced.

Alexis: Clearly I need to write a romance where the actual protagonist or love interest is a spy. Because I seem to keep pairing secondary characters up with spies. Or maybe I just assume spies are more common in everyday life than they actually are, given I went to a university from which government agencies directly recruit. I mean I do generally assume that people who tell me they work in either customs or the diplomatic service are spies.

4 . Paragraph begins with: “Maybe. I don’t know.”

Alexis: I think Alfie just took it for granted that someone as exuberantly out and comfortable with his sexuality as Greg must just automatically know what they want in all circumstances. When, of course, people and their wants are always complicated—no matter how confident the act they put on. Greg, however, should definitely have been more honest, both with Alfie and with himself.

5 . Paragraph begins with: “That’s all right. Romantic, cross-country dashes…”

Alexis: Obliviously comments the author who would later write a book with another cross-country dash in it. Even to the same part of the country.

The reality is, though, they haven’t lost their charm for me yet.

6 . Paragraph begins with: Greg was standing under a map…

Alexis: I did actually see this sign, complete with the Samaritans advert, on my way into Tyneside once. I have no idea if it’s still there. I hope so because it did make me cackle.

7 . Paragraph begins with: A telltale flush stole across the arch of Fen’s cheekbones.

Alexis: Revealing parallel I’ve accidentally made here between getting married and being topped.

In all seriousness, though, I think it’s fairly useful for me to think of Pansies as almost in dialogue with Husband Material , even though I wrote Husband Material many years later. Spoilers for Husband Material ?

I know that many readers were disappointed that Luc and Oliver did not choose to get married at the end of Husband Material —perhaps because it feels inherently romantic to have true love change your perspective on the institution of marriage. The thing is, though, it doesn’t have to? The love isn’t diminished by that choice, nor the longevity of the relationship, and marriage—let’s be real—remains a fairly problematic social convention. And I think what’s important about Luc and Oliver is that neither of them had particularly strong positive feelings about marriage in the first place (and Oliver has strong negative ones).

Alfie, though, Alfie does—for all the reasons he lays out in the book, including not wanting to feel that his sexuality has taken away from him something that would be important to him if he was straight. And because of that—because of Alfie—Fen changes his mind. And it seems right that he would and could, because Pansies is a book all about change.