Perfect Enough

Chapter Three – Josh

Chapter Three

JOSH

A few days passed without a text from Sophia. I wanted to text her, but it felt strange being the one to reach out. Now I wondered if she was feeling the same way.

“Shaw, what in the hell do you keep staring at your phone for?” Warren asked.

Looking up, I saw Warren, Larry, and Donny—Warren’s younger brother, and a new addition to the team—all watching me.

“I’m not staring at my phone.”

Larry laughed. “Yes, you are.”

At that very moment, a notification came through—and I looked down to see it was Sophia.

Standing, I said, “I think I’ll get some fresh air.”

The three watched me walk out of the common room and head outside.

Once I’d cleared the room, I pulled up the text.

Sophia: Did I scare you off?

I smiled.

Me: Not at all. I figured when you were able to text, you would.

Sophia: Are you sure you’re not a girl?

Laughing, I looked around to make sure no one had slipped outside.

Me: I have an older sister, so maybe she wore off on me. I remember listening to her and my mother talk when I wasn’t supposed to. More than one conversation was about guys. Guess I picked up some things.

The dots started, stopped, then started again.

Sophia: Please tell me that doesn’t count as personal information.

Me: I suck at this rule. Let’s pretend that doesn’t count. What do you want to know?

I watched as Sophia typed. She must have stopped for a few moments before she started again.

Sophia: You said you worked on a cattle ranch. What’s your job?

That was an easy one.

Me: My family owns it, and I kind of do whatever needs to be done. My father used to raise bulls for bull riding, so most of my life I grew up helping him with that, as well as helping elsewhere on the ranch. Too many jobs to list. I’m also a firefighter.

Sophia: I’m assuming it’s the firefighter job that keeps the women away.

Smiling again, I typed back my response, wondering why these text messages had been some of the best conversations I’d had in a long time.

Me: You would be right. My turn. What do you do for a living, Sophia?

Sophia: My mother owns a dance studio, and I teach dance to little kids, mostly four - to twelve-year-olds. I also do all the books and admin stuff.

Me: Really? My sister Rose took lessons for a while, and the teacher let me join the class. I mastered first position, second position, third position, fourth position, and fifth position. I was pretty good at a plié, if I do say so myself.

Sophia: LOL! I’m impressed.

Me: Well, then you’re the first woman to be impressed by that.

Sophia: I’m a dance teacher, so I can see why.

Me: Look at us, getting the personal thing out of the way first. What are your plans for today?

Sophia: I have no actual plans. I have weekends off, including Fridays. I was planning on cleaning and mopping my floors.

I chuckled as I glanced up again to see if I was still alone.

Me: Whoa, slow down there. Those are some pretty intense plans.

Sophia: My best friend, Chloe, wants me to go out with her and a few of our friends tonight.

Me: Why don’t you?

It took her a good three minutes before she started to type.

Sophia: Have you ever had your heart broken, Josh?

Me: Honestly? No, I haven’t. But I’m a great listener if you want to talk about it.

Sophia: I don’t even know you yet; I don’t want to spill my heart to you.

Me: Maybe not knowing me makes me a safe space for you to share your feelings.

Sophia: Maybe. Are you at work?

Me: I am, and if a call comes in, I’ll have to go, but I’ll be back. Tell me what’s going on.

It felt like she waited a lifetime before she texted back.

Sophia: I feel lost. Well, maybe lost isn’t the right word. I don’t feel happy. And going out and acting happy would only make me feel like a fake. Does that make sense?

Me: Yes, I think it does. There’s nothing wrong with feeling sad, Sophia. The loss of someone you love is very traumatic. And it sounds like your douchebag of a boyfriend hurt you even more not long after your dad passed.

Sophia: He is a douchebag. And yes, he did. It felt like someone kicked me in the ribs while I was already lying on the frozen-cold ground, and I’ve still yet to catch my breath entirely. My mother thinks I’m being ridiculous and that I need to move on and start dating. I don’t know why she won’t drop it. It seems like she’s moved on from my father’s death relatively easily. She’s already dating, Josh! It hasn’t even been five months since he died.

Fuck. I could practically feel the grief coming off of this woman.

Me: Sophia…do you mind if I ask how your father died?

I stared at my phone as the minutes slowly ticked by and silently let out a curse. I’d asked the wrong question.

Quickly, I started to type out my apology when her one-word reply came in.

Sophia: Suicide.

Closing my eyes, I whispered, “Fuck, fuck, fuck!”

Me: I am so sorry. I know those words are tossed around way too easily, but I truly am. And as for your mother…maybe moving on is her way of dealing with her loss.

Sophia: I never thought about it that way. But I can’t move on by dating another guy. I think I just need a break from men, does that make sense? I mean, I don’t want to die an old lady surrounded by cats, dogs, and birds.

I looked at that last word and wanted to laugh.

Me: Not birds! The dogs and cats, yes. But birds?

Sophia: Don’t all people bird watch? You owe me a personal tidbit. Maybe like twenty. We really suck at that. I say we dissolve that rule.

Me: It appears I do, and I agree we should dissolve it.

Holding my breath, I waited for her to ask.

Sophia: Where do you live?

Me: Hamilton, Montana.

Sophia: Oh my God. Josh, I live in Stevensville!

I stared at her last text. At absolute best, she was thirty minutes from me. What in the hell were the odds of that? And what did we do with this new information?

The fire alarm went off, and I only had time to type back one word.

Me: Alarm!

I shoved my cell into my pocket and ran into the firehouse. Slipping into my gear, I quickly climbed into the truck. Warren looked at me questioningly.

“What?” I asked over the sirens.

He shrugged. “Just making sure your head is clear.”

I glared at him. “Have I ever asked you that before?”

“No, but I’m pretty damn sure you’ve never seen me smiling at my phone like I was fucking besotted.”

“Fuck you, Warren.”

He laughed, and I tried like hell not to look at him again as we raced toward the fire.

By the time we got back from our call—a small fire in an abandoned warehouse—and I got out of my turnout gear and showered, I was pretty sure it was too late to text Sophia. Even though she had sent the last text.

Sophia: Be careful!

Me: Sleeping?

The dots quickly appeared, and I couldn’t ignore how my stomach did a weird dip.

Sophia: Reading.

Me: Hot date with a book, huh?

Sophia: You bet! It’s a mystery love story, but the two main characters are taking forever to admit that they like each other. I’m getting annoyed.

Smiling, I lay back on my bed.

Sophia: So, now that we know we live so close to each other, I wonder if we’ve ever been in the same place at the same time.

Me: We could have been, especially if we’re anywhere close to the same age, we did say to hell with that rule.

Sophia: We most certainly did.

Me: Why do I love that you’re a rule breaker?

Sophia: Like you’re not dying to know how old I am.

Me: I’m very curious to know how old you are. I’m twenty-two.

Sophia: I’m twenty-two also.

Me: That is crazy! What are the odds we’d be the same age?

Sophia: It is crazy, but also kind of neat.

Me: Did your mom ever put up that dating profile?

Sophia: No! Thank goodness. She called me earlier and wanted to set me up on a blind date with one of her co-workers’ sons. He’s thirty and ready to settle down. WTF?

I smiled and put my phone down when I heard someone walk down the hall. A light knock on my cracked-open door had me calling out for them to come in.

Warren stuck his head in. “Hungry? Donny’s on kitchen duty and has everything to make pizzas.”

My stomach growled. “Yeah, give me five minutes and I’ll be there.”

He looked at me knowingly and nodded. “Don’t be too long. All the pepperoni will be gone.”

“Five minutes.”

Me: Why don’t you simply tell your mom you’re already dating someone? And sorry for the delay.

Sophia: First, let’s add to the rules. No apologizing if you can’t text back. You’re a firefighter, so I’m sure you’ve got to go the second an alarm goes off. Let’s just put that out there right now. And I’ll most likely fall asleep while texting at some point, or have to go to the bathroom, and I’m not at all comfortable texting someone while sitting on the toilet.

I burst out laughing.

Sophia: Second, my mother would immediately want to meet him. That would never work.

The idea popped into my head, and I was typing it out before I could stop myself.

Me: Tell her that we’re dating. I live far enough away and have a job that keeps me busy…two, actually. It would be easy to push her off if she says she wants to meet me. I could even text you while you’re with your mom and say something sweet. Something convincing for her to see.

When she didn’t reply, and it was nearing my five minutes, I stood and headed to the kitchen. On the way there, Sophia texted.

Sophia: You know, Josh, that might work. I think it COULD work. I could just say we met online and started talking, which isn’t actually a lie.

Me: Nope, not a lie at all.

Sophia: And you don’t mind if I say we’re…seeing one another?

Me: You could’ve told her anyway and I wouldn’t have known the difference. If it gives you some peace of mind and breathing space, Soph, then yes. Please use me.

Sophia: Thank you, Josh.

Me: Of course ;-)

It was crazy how good it made me feel that I could help take some of the stress out of Sophia’s life. I didn’t even really know this woman, yet I already cared about her. Slipping my cell into my back pocket as I walked into the kitchen, I slapped my hands together and said, “Let’s make some pizza!”