Push (Colorado Storm Hockey #3)

Chapter 30

30

HUX

Our parade bus is rolling through the streets of Denver. I'm up top with a beer in hand and my shades on. I’m surrounded by my favorite teammates and their families. There’s so much energy from the crowd below, it’s a hell of a change from the quiet I’ve had the past few days.

I glance at Ada, who’s chatting with Summer, Mac’s pregnant fiancée. Ada catches my eye and flashes me a smile that makes me smile in return. I still can’t believe she convinced me to come today. Her stubbornness rivals my own, and I’m grateful for it. But I made a deal with her. I’ll go if you go. She had some nervous hesitation at first since she didn’t know anyone and she said something about a hard launch—whatever that means. But it didn’t take much to convince her. I want her here with me.

“Still can’t get over the new look, Hux,” Wags shouts over the noise and reaches out to muss my short hair. “You’re trending all over Denver, man!”

“Yeah, yeah. Enjoy it while it lasts,” I grumble.

Cutting the hair was admittedly a dramatic move, but it seemed like the right time to do it. I didn’t think through the attention it would bring me.

Mac, who’s holding the Cup for all the fans to see, can somehow chime in on my appearance too. “Seriously, though. You look like a different person. In a good way.”

I run a hand over my stubbled jaw, still not used to the absence of my beard. “Feels different, too.”

Ada appears at my side, sliding her hand into mine. I pull her close and press a kiss to her temple.

“Having fun?” I murmur into her ear.

She nods, her eyes sparkling. “It’s amazing. Thank you for inviting me.”

Across the bus, I spot our goalie, Hawk, with his arm around Alexandria, Coach Bliss’s daughter. Coach is watching them closely but looks rather content. It’s still weird seeing them together, but even I can see that it works.

Coach Bliss catches me looking and makes his way over to me. “Can we talk?”

I nod, giving Ada’s hand a squeeze before following Coach to a quieter corner of the bus.

“Hell of a season,” he starts, his eyes on the cheering crowd below. “Hell of a career.”

I swallow hard, not knowing where this is going. “Thanks, Coach.”

He turns to me, his gaze intense. “Are you sure you don’t want to come back for one more year? I think you easily have it in you. So does our G.M., Mickey Dalton.”

The question hits me harder than I expected. I look out at the sea of blue and white, at my teammates celebrating with their loved ones. At Ada, laughing at something Summer said.

“I’ll think about it,” I hear myself say.

Coach claps me on the shoulder. “That’s all I ask.”

As he walks away, I feel a familiar ache in my chest. The thought of leaving all this behind…it’s harder than I imagined, bu t I made my peace with it months ago. I haven’t been torn about the decision in a long while, but now I’m being pulled back the other way.

Ada appears at my side again. “Everything okay? That seemed serious.”

I pull her into my arms, burying my face in her hair. She smells like Colorado sunshine and orange blossom. “Coach just asked me if I want to come back for next season.”

“And do you?”

“I don’t know,” I tell her, truthfully, and pull away to look at her face.

She nods and pulls her lips into her mouth.

“Is there something you want to say, Ms. Khoury?”

Ada’s eyes search mine for a moment before she speaks. “I think you should do what feels right for you, Nik. Not for anyone else, not even for me. What does your gut tell you?”

I shut my eyes and try to make sense of what Ada's saying. The crowd noise fades out, and it's just me and my thoughts. Shit. Hockey's been my lifeline, my way out. I owe everything to this game. It gave me a purpose, a paycheck, a life away from all the crap I grew up with.

I still love the game. But my body? It's telling me to fuck off. I'm in pain more often than not. Waking up feeling like I've been hit by a truck is getting old. Real old.

And I made my way out a long time ago. I don’t need hockey to protect me anymore. I can retire a champion, just like I hoped. It’s time to rest and maybe, just maybe, aim for a little bit of happiness.

When I finally open my eyes, I meet Ada’s gaze with a newfound clarity.

“I think it’s time.” The realization is settling in my chest.

A small smile tugs at the corners of Ada’s lips as she reaches up and places her hands on my shoulders. “Then that’s your answer. ”

I wrap my arms around her waist and pull her closer. I feel…relieved.

“And everything is going to be okay,” she adds.

And for the first time in days, I actually believe it. My father is the furthest thing from my mind. As I hold Ada close, I think back to early this morning. After we’d made love, our bodies still tangled together, I had whispered those three words, I love you . But she had seemed lost in her own world, and I’m not sure she heard me. It’s okay, I think. I’ll tell her again when the time is right.

Ada pulls back slightly and looks up at me. “You won’t believe how crazy my family is going about me being in this parade. They won’t stop texting me!”

It’s easy to imagine her boisterous family glued to their TV screens. “I bet they’re loving every second.”

She nods. “Kyla’s going a bit overboard with the jealousy, though. I never wanted her to feel that way, you know? When we started all this? I just wanted them to stop pestering me about getting married.”

I squeeze her hand reassuringly. “Forget about Kyla, just enjoy it.”

Ada smiles up at me. “Teta would have loved this,” she says softly. “She always said I needed to find someone who could keep up with our family’s craziness. I think I might just have found him.”

The mention of Lena is bittersweet. I pull Ada closer, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “I’m sure you miss her,” I murmur.

“So much,” she says and leans a little harder into me.

As the bus rounds another corner, the cheers of the crowd filling the streets of downtown Denver, I realize that whatever comes next, I don’t have to face it alone.

I have Ada. I have her family. I have my teammates. And that’s more than enough.

It’s been days since I’ve checked my mail, so I pull into the post office parking lot and shut off the engine. The thought of the pile waiting for me is almost enough to make me turn around and head back home. But I force myself out of the Jeep.

I twist the key in my box, grimacing at the stack of envelopes that tumble out. Back in the Jeep, I sift through the pile. It’s mostly junk mail since my bills are automated and my financial advisor takes care of everything else. And then I see it—a thick, cream-colored envelope with elegant script. My stomach drops as I read the return address.

It’s from Debbie, and it’s clearly a wedding invitation.

I open it up and stare at the invitation, my mind reeling. St. Catherine’s Catholic Church, reception to follow. I can’t believe she’d want me there. I can’t believe she’d think I’d want to be there.

As if summoned by the invitation opening, my phone buzzes. Debbie’s name flashes on the screen. For a moment, I consider ignoring it. But curiosity gets the better of me.

“Hello?”

“Hux,” Debbie’s voice comes through, a mix of familiarity and tension. “It’s been a while.”

“Yeah,” I grunt, remembering how our last conversation ended. She’s definitely been keeping her distance from me since that happened and the space has been a relief. “What’s up?”

There’s a pause before she speaks again. “I got a call from your aunt. Wondering if I could convince you to go see your dad.”

I feel my jaw clench. “I know, she told me.”

“Well, what are you going to do?”

“Nothing. ”

“You’re not going to go see him?” Debbie says, a hint of accusation in her voice.

I lean back in my seat and shut my eyes. “It’s not that simple.”

“Why not?” she pushes. “He’s your father. He’s dying.”

“You never cared about my family issues before,” I snap. “Why start now?”

There’s a sharp intake of breath on the other end of the line. “That’s not fair. I always cared. You just never let me in.”

“It doesn’t matter now,” I say, feeling the old frustration bubbling up. “It’s none of your business anymore, is it?”

“I guess not,” Debbie concedes, her voice softening. “But I still care about you, Hux. I think you should go see him.”

I laugh, but there’s no humor in it. “You don’t know what you’re talking about. You don’t know what he did, what he was like.”

“Then tell me.”

For a moment, I consider it. But then I shake my head, even though she can’t see me. “No. That ship has sailed. We don’t belong to each other anymore.”

There’s a long pause. “No, I suppose we don’t,” Debbie finally says. “I saw you on TV, you know. During the parade. With your wife.”

The way she says ‘wife’ makes me bristle. “Her name is Ada.”

“Right, Ada,” Debbie says, and I can practically hear her rolling her eyes. “Don’t act like you didn’t marry her to make me jealous.”

“You’re right,” I admit, surprising myself with my honesty. “At first, that’s what it was. A drunken mistake in Vegas, a way to stick it to you. But it’s not like that anymore.”

“What do you mean?”

I take a deep breath, trying to find the right words. “Ada…sh e’s different. She sees me, really sees me. All the ugly parts, all the broken bits. And she doesn’t run. She stays.”

“You love her,” Debbie says. It’s not a question.

“Yeah,” I say softly. “I do. In a way I didn’t think was possible anymore.”

There’s a long silence on the other end of the line. When Debbie speaks again, her voice is thick with emotion. “I’m glad, Hux. I really am. You deserve to be happy.”

“Thanks,” I mumble, feeling suddenly awkward. “I hope you are too.”

“I am,” she says. “It’s different with him. Better.”

I nod, even though she can’t see me. “Good. That’s good.”

Another pause. “So, I guess you won’t be coming to the wedding then?”

I can’t help but chuckle. “No. I don’t think that would be appropriate.”

“Yeah, you’re probably right,” she agrees. “Take care of yourself, Hux.”

“You too. Goodbye, Debbie.”

“Goodbye, Hux.”

I hang up and let out a long breath. The conversation drained me, but I feel oddly lighter, like I’ve finally put down a heavy weight I’ve been carrying for years.

As I start the Jeep, my thoughts turn to Ada. To the way her eyes crinkle when she laughs, the passion in her voice when she talks about her products, the feeling of her body curled against mine in the early morning light, and that damn blue ribbon she wears in her hair. I realize, with a sudden clarity, that it’s time. Time to tell her how I feel, to make sure she knows that this isn’t just a marriage of convenience, or revenge, or rebellion anymore. It hasn’t been for a while. It’s real, and it’s deep, and it’s probably the best thing that’s ever happened to me .

I pull out of the parking lot, the invitation to Debbie’s wedding mixed in with all the other junk mail forgotten on the passenger seat. I’ve got more important things to focus on now.