Quiet Longing (Quiet Love #2)

11.

Charli

“I think it’s safe for you to let go now,” Rhys said quietly, breaking me from my fixation.

I’d been officially staring.

I never realised how sexy a boy’s throat could be, but I was obsessed with Rhys’. The way it moved when he swallowed, or the flutter in his jaw when my palm splayed out over his collarbone. Did I affect him like he affected me?

Finally, I released my hold and floated away a small distance. “Thank you for keeping me safe from Aidan, good sir,” I said, fluttering my eyelashes humorously though my voice was breathy, betraying how worked up I was. Maybe it was all the touching. I wasn’t used to so much contact, especially not with someone I liked.

Rhys nodded silently, running a hand through his wet hair. A strand still clung to his forehead, and I moved towards him on instinct, my hand snatching out to smooth it back. Rhys arched a curious eyebrow, and I flushed. His eyes ran over me, dipping low to my cleavage. The swimsuit was tight, and it pushed my boobs together in a way Rhys appeared to find diverting.

I started to smile, and his eyes flicked up. Now, it was his turn to flush.

“See something you like?” I tilted my head.

“I wasn’t, uh, I mean, okay, yes, I was. Sorry for staring.”

“It’s okay. I don’t mind,” I said, and something like surprise danced across his features.

Several moments of quiet passed, the tension thick, before he rubbed his jaw. “We should probably head upstairs.”

He started to move to the edge of the pool to climb out when I said, “Wait.” Rhys looked back at me. I swam close to him and plucked at the wet material of his T-shirt. “Why are you wearing this?”

His face clouded. “I’ve never really been comfortable going shirtless.”

My heart clenched hearing his reason. The fact he could have such low self-esteem when he was so handsome boggled my mind. “That’s too bad. I was hoping to do some staring of my own.”

Rhys chuckled softly. “I promise you there’s nothing worth staring at.”

I moved even closer, my mouth a hair’s breadth from his cheek when I murmured, “I’ll be the judge of that.”

With a flirty smile, I finally moved away and climbed out of the pool. I didn’t look back, but I felt his eyes on me as I emerged, the water dripping down my body. I grabbed one of the remaining clean towels Derek had left on the lounge chairs and wrapped it around myself before I picked one up for Rhys. He was out of the pool, too, his T-shirt drenched and clinging to him.

“Here,” I said softly, handing him the towel.

“Thanks.” There was a slightly unsure look on his face as he patted the ends of his hair. I stood watching him, not wanting to go upstairs yet because I liked being alone with him too much. There was a feeling between us, a lovely kind of tension. Surely, he felt it, too.

Surprising me, he reached for the hem of his T-shirt and pulled it off. My stomach flipped. Rhys was a tall guy, and though he was carrying a few extra pounds, that didn’t take away from my attraction to him. In fact, I was very attracted to those extra pounds. There was something so manly about his husky physique. I just wanted him to pick me up and throw me over his shoulder like a caveman.

Yes, I was a cliché.

I knew he was probably feeling self-conscious, especially if he never took his shirt off around people. So, even though I was shy about liking him, and there was a part of me that just wanted to keep it secret, there was another part that wanted to validate him. I wanted him to know there was nothing about his body he needed to keep covered up.

“Has it gotten hotter in here?” I asked, fanning myself as my eyes traced his chest and stomach while he dried off with the towel.

A very faint smile tugged at his lips as he rolled his eyes. “Okay, you don’t need to pretend.”

“Who’s pretending?” I countered, my towel hanging around my shoulders as I stepped close to him and looked up. My eyes found his and held. “You’re hot, Rhys. Time to accept it.” Then I lost complete control of my faculties when I went up on my tiptoes and pressed a light kiss to his cheek. I heard his intake of breath as my lips met his warm skin. I moved away, and every inch of me flamed hotter. Rhys eyes burned into mine, his expression intense, his jaw flickering in that way that always mesmerised me. I wanted to move my mouth a little to the left because I’d been becoming more and more curious about what his lips felt like.

What they might taste like.

I was pretty sure I’d stunned him because he didn’t say a word as I left and went upstairs, my heart pounding the entire time. When I entered the kitchen, everyone appeared to have showered and changed into dry clothes. Just how long had Rhys and I dawdled in the pool for?

“You and Rhys missed your chance to order,” Tristan told me with a glint in his eye like he imagined we’d been downstairs making out or something. “So, you’ll just have to eat what we picked.”

“That’s fine. I’m going to grab a quick shower.”

I passed through and made my way to the stairs. I made it onto the first step when Aidan appeared. He was studying me curiously like I was a puzzle he couldn’t quite figure out.

“If you’re here to enact revenge, you should know I’m not afraid to fight dirty.”

Aidan chuckled and shook his head, raising his hands in the air. “No revenge, I promise. I’ve decided to take the high road on this one.”

“Very mature of you,” I said, still not trusting him. This waving of the white flag could be a ruse.

A beat of silence fell before he went on, “So, you and Rhys, eh?”

I placed a hand on my hip. “Is that a statement or a question?”

“A bit of both I suppose.”

“Huh, okay, well, I’m going now.”

“Hold on,” he said, rubbing his jaw, and for a very brief second, I saw his mask of bravado slip and a hint of genuine curiosity show. “You like him?”

“Yes,” I told him truthfully. “I like Rhys a lot. He’s a great guy. Is that all?”

Aidan blew out a breath. “I don’t know whether to be annoyed or happy about this.”

“Excuse me?”

He shook his head, starting to smile a little as his eyes ran over me. “It’s a shame. We could’ve had some fun together, but I can’t help being made up for Rhys. He deserves to get laid.”

His assumption bothered me. “Who says he’s getting laid? I like him. That doesn’t mean we’re going to have sex.”

Now, Aidan’s expression turned knowing. “Sure, and you didn’t use me coming for you in the pool as an excuse to put your hands all over him. I’m onto you, Moretti. You want to take the lad’s innocence. He doesn’t know what he’s in for.”

His teasing tone was warm rather than mocking. But, still, I didn’t appreciate yet again being painted as some sort of vixen out to deflower poor innocent Rhys. Derek was the first to insinuate it and now Aidan. Was that how I came across? Because it certainly wasn’t how I felt. I was a virgin for crying out loud. And furthermore, was that how they saw their friend? I didn’t see Rhys that way. He might’ve been more reserved than the other boys, but the way he looked at me sometimes … I suspected he had thoughts about me that were far from pure.

“I’m not taking anyone’s innocence,” I stated. “And if Rhys didn’t want my hands all over him, he would’ve said so. Now, I’m going to shower.” With that, I continued up the stairs, hearing Aidan’s amused chuckle as I left.

What he said got me thinking, though. Derek had mentioned Rhys had never had a girlfriend. That didn’t technically mean he was a virgin, but after Aidan’s comment on his innocence, I had to believe he was. Well, that made two of us.

I showered quickly then threw on some leggings and, feeling brave, cast aside the sweater I’d been about to pull on before grabbing Rhys’ blue hoodie. I put it on, loving the feel of wearing something that belonged to him, before twisting my hair up in a knot. Hearing the doorbell ring, I noted the food had arrived, and my stomach rumbled. I was starving.

Everyone was dividing up the pizzas when I entered the kitchen. Grabbing a plate, I made brief eye contact with Rhys before taking the seat next to him. I wondered what he thought about me wearing his hoodie, not to mention kissing his cheek down by the pool. I’d never been very forward when it came to guys I’d liked. Usually, if I wasn’t being actively pursued, I just kept my feelings to myself until they eventually faded. But with Rhys, it was different. I liked him so much I couldn’t help myself.

I felt his gaze practically sizzling into me, but he didn’t comment on my attire even though I knew he’d noticed it.

After we ate, Tristan began suggesting we play a game of Hide and Seek like we used to when we were kids.

“I’m not sure you’re supposed to play that after the age of ten,” Theo said with a chuckle.

“Oh, come on! It’ll be fun. We’ll play the grown-up version.”

“What’s the grown-up version?” Rhys asked.

Tristan waggled his eyebrows. “Hide and seek in the dark.”

“I don’t like playing games in the dark,” Nuala said. “I always feel like I’m going to see a ghost. Or an axe murderer.”

“That’s what makes it exciting,” Tristan argued with a chuckle. “So, who’s in?”

I was surprised when everyone seemed to be down to play, considering all the food we’d just eaten. I only really felt like lying in bed to let the carbs absorb and wondered if I might be able to sneak away during the game. Surely, no one would try to hide in my room, right?

Derek and Rhys started clearing away the plates and pizza boxes while Tristan and Theo went about turning off all the lights in the house. I went to help with the clean-up, and as I watched Derek load dishes into the dishwasher, I started to understand something about him. Derek had the maturity of a man in his twenties rather than a nineteen-year-old. I couldn’t imagine any of the boys I went to school with cleaning up after themselves like this. Maybe it was simply a product of being the eldest. He had to be the grown up one amongst his siblings.

“All right,” Tristan said when he and Theo returned. “All the lights are off save for the ones in here. Who wants to be the seeker?”

Aidan raised his hand. “I’ll do it. I’m confident I know all the best hiding spots in this house.”

“Don’t be so sure,” Nuala countered with a grin.

Derek sent Milly a warm smile, stepping close to her and placing his hand on her shoulder. “You sure you want to play?”

She nodded and smiled back. “It’ll be fun.”

“Okay, I’ll give you a count of sixty to find a place to hide,” Aidan said. “Starting from when Tristan turns the final light out.”

I began covertly moving towards the door. I’d planned to go hide out in my room until the game was over, but the idea of a countdown got me excited. I had a competitive streak, and I suddenly decided I was going to find a hiding spot so good I’d be the last to be found.

Rhys’ eyes landed on mine a moment before Tristan turned the light off. There was something in his gaze that sent a tremble through me, like he was thinking about me telling him he was hot. Aidan began counting down, and I hadn’t moved yet. Damn, I needed to get going. I’d let Rhys’ sexy eyes distract me.

“Fifty-six, fifty-five,” Aidan counted, and I got my butt in gear. My eyes hadn’t fully adjusted to the dark, so I had to feel my way along the wall to get out. Once in the hallway, some of the moonlight shining through the glass panels by the entrance lit my way. I could hear Nuala giggling and Theo whispering something as I made my way to the stairs. I was sure to go slow for fear of tripping on a step.

Aidan’s countdown had almost gotten down to zero when I reached the top of the stairs and frantically tried to decide which room to hide in. Remembering the room with the pool table had a large window with thick curtains, I decided that might be a good option. Shuffling quietly in the dark, I found the door and turned the handle. I entered the room, and it was empty.

I hurried towards the curtains, passing by a long couch when, suddenly, someone touched my hand, and I gave a quiet yelp. A hushed chuckle ensued, and I glanced down to find Rhys stretched out on the floor behind the couch.

“You almost scared me half to death,” I whispered.

“Sorry. Come down here. We can share this hiding spot.” His voice was pitched low, and my stomach did a weird flip at the thought of wedging myself in next to him. As always, I couldn’t resist as I let him tug me down to the floor. The expensive, plush carpet was soft under my head as I stretched my body out alongside his.

Right, well, this was unexpectedly intimate.

“Okay, I’m coming to find you!” Aidan declared from downstairs, his voice muffled behind the closed door. I heard Nuala give a squeal of trepidation from wherever she was hiding, unable to keep her excitement at bay.

“I love that girl, but she’s so silly sometimes. Aidan’s going to find her first,” I whispered to Rhys who quietly laughed.

“Good. Let her distract him so he doesn’t come looking for us.”

His eyes met mine in the dark, and my belly fluttered thinking he didn’t want to be found yet. He wanted to stay here, his body stretched out next to mine.

We fell quiet for a minute, and I shifted in place, unable to find a comfortable position. My elbow dug into his side, and I grimaced.

“Sorry. Just trying to find a good position,” I whispered then realised how the statement could be construed. Rhys didn’t tease me, though.

“It’s fine,” he replied low. “You can lean into me. I don’t mind.”

“Oh, okay,” I said and allowed my body to relax a little more. I hadn’t wanted to squash him. We stayed like that for a while, quietly listening to Aidan stomp about the house trying to find everyone. I knew as soon as he found Nuala because she gave another squeal and exclaimed, “Boo! Not fair!”

Aidan said something in response, but it was too muffled to hear.

“We’re one step closer to winning,” I whispered and noticed Rhys had rested his hand on my hip. I didn’t comment on it because he probably just needed a place to put it, and my hip was the nearest location. My mind went to the interaction with Aidan earlier on the stairs, how he’d described me. It still niggled because the picture he’d painted was far from how I saw myself.

We’d been quiet for a few minutes when I whispered, “Hey, Rhys, can I ask you something?”

His eyes flickered between mine. “Sure.”

“Do I ever make you feel uncomfortable? Like, when we’re around each other, do I come on too strong?”

He looked confused. “Come on too strong?”

Embarrassment swept over me. “With the flirty stuff, I mean.”

Understanding dawned, and his eyes widened a little. “No, I don’t think so. I, um …” he trailed off, his brow furrowing before he continued, “I like it.” He swallowed thickly. “When you flirt.”

Instantly, my face warmed. “Oh,” I breathed. “Good. I just don’t ever want you to feel awkward.”

His hand on my hip moved a few inches higher, the touch sending shockwaves through me. “I definitely don’t.” A pause. “What’s brought all this on?”

I hesitated to tell him about Aidan’s comment since I didn’t want to cause trouble with his friends. “It’s nothing. I just worry about these things sometimes. Silly, really.” I looked away, and his other hand came to my chin, tilting it towards him.

“I can tell there’s more you’re not saying.” His blue eyes were probing.

I blew out a breath. “Seriously, we should keep quiet in case—”

“Charli, out with it.”

Something about his low, authoritative command had me blurting, “It was Aidan. He said something about us, and it made me paranoid because Derek insinuated something similar.”

Rhys’ expression darkened. “What did he say?”

I frowned, worrying my lip. “He just acted like I was some seductress out to steal your innocence. He said I used him coming for me in the pool as an excuse to put my hands all over you.”

His expression clouded further, his body stiffening. “He’s such a dick.”

“I think he’s just jealous that I like you better than him. He obviously noticed we’ve been spending a lot of time together.”

Rhys studied me a moment, seeming interested in my statement about me liking him better. “Right,” he said at last, and I had no idea what he was thinking.

“Are you okay?” I whispered low. Aidan had come upstairs, and it sounded like he was checking the bedrooms.

In the dark, I saw a small, nervous flutter in Rhys’ jaw. “I’m fine. I’m just a bit pissed at Aidan.”

“For calling you innocent? It’s not a bad thing.”

“He was trying to mess with your head.”

“I don’t think so. Besides, I can hardly judge you for being a virgin when I’m one, too.”

He blinked, staring at me in a strange way. My skin flushed.

“You,” Rhys whispered, his throat working as he swallowed, then went on, “You’re a virgin?”

“Is that a big surprise? I’m only eighteen. It’s perfectly normal.”

“No, that’s not what I …” he trailed off then pressed his lips together before casting me an apologetic look. “I know it’s normal. Sorry. I’m not surprised, it’s just … I guess I hadn’t thought about it. All the boys have had sex. They know I haven’t and like to rib me about it sometimes, so it’s kind of a reflex to get defensive.”

I brought my palm to his chest as I replied very quietly, “You don’t need to be sorry.” I paused then smiled at him. “And I’ll bet your friends have had a lot less sex than they claim. People tend to exaggerate these things.”

“I don’t know. I’ve been going to parties with the boys for years, and they never have any trouble attracting girls.”

My hand on his chest moved up until my fingers curled around his shoulder. “Well, sure, but that doesn’t mean they’re actually doing the deed.”

“True. I’m certainly not an eye witness,” he replied deadpan, and I chuckled.

“Stop. I need to pee, and when I laugh, it makes it worse.”

“Sorry. You can go. It doesn’t matter if Aidan finds us. It’s only a game.”

“No, I want to win,” I argued. “I’ve got a mean competitive streak.”

Rhys gazed at me fondly, and a few moments of silence passed. My mind went over our conversation, and I remembered my half formed idea to have a fling with an Irish boy that summer. I’d never been particularly eager to lose my virginity. It was just something I figured would happen when the time was right and when I met the right person, and staring at Rhys, I suddenly felt like I had. If I was going to be with someone for the first time, I wanted it to be him. He was so patient and caring. Gwyn said her first time was awful and borderline traumatic. She’d slept with some stoner guy she met at a concert. I couldn’t imagine it being anything like that with Rhys. He’d be careful with me. And I’d be oh so careful with him.

“I’ve had a thought,” I said before fully thinking through the proposal.

“A thought?” Rhys questioned.

Nerves tumbled through me. “Well, you see, since we both have this virgin thing hanging over us, I thought, maybe …” I was glad of the darkness because my cheeks flamed hot.

“Charli,” Rhys said, his voice a husky murmur. His hand moved higher to my ribcage. My pulse pounded as I willed myself to finish voicing my idea.

“We could have sex,” I blurted. “That way, we wouldn’t be virgins anymore. We’d be doing each other a favour.” This wasn’t at all true. Generally, I was in no hurry to have sex. But I wanted to have sex with Rhys. I just didn’t have the courage to simply express that want since it was all tied up in the feelings I was developing for him. Putting it out there as a simple proposition allowed me to feel a lot less vulnerable. If he said no, I could hide how personally I’d take the rejection.

Rhys was stunned silent, or at least that was what I thought, but then I realised why he’d fallen quiet. The door had just opened, and Aidan stepped inside the room.

“I know someone’s in here. I heard you talking.”

Crap, had I been that loud? My eyes met Rhys’, and I was suddenly filled with tension because I’d just asked possibly the most embarrassing question I’d ever asked in my life, and he couldn’t currently give an answer. His eyes were soft, though, a little searching, his expression tender as he stared at me. Oh man, could he see through my bluster? Could he tell I was making out like sex could be a simple arrangement between us to cover how attached I already felt? If it weren’t for his sudden silence, I might’ve suspected he hadn’t even noticed Aidan entering the room. He was just looking at me in a way that made my throat turn dry. It made me feel open and exposed. But not judged. Rhys would never judge me.

Aidan checked all about the room, though strangely he didn’t think to look behind the couch. Rhys’ hand came to the back of my neck, his fingers tracing along my hairline, and a shiver trickled through me. I was vaguely aware of Aidan talking to himself grumpily as he left the room, the door closing with a soft click.

My eyes returned to Rhys’, and I hoped he’d say something, anything, but he didn’t breathe a word. Instead, he leaned closer, and my breath caught when he touched his lips to mine. I inhaled sharply, my heart hammering as he closed his eyes, his mouth beginning to move. He was kissing me, and it was like my brain short circuited. It took me a moment to fully register it was happening.

Then my lips automatically began to move with his, kissing him back. He huffed a gruff breath, his hand on my neck angling my head back as he deepened the kiss. He moved his body, hovering over me until my back was flat to the carpet. and he was above me. I gripped his shirt, tugging him closer, needing more of … something.

My breathing turned all fast and erratic, a coiling, sharp tension between my thighs. I was turned on in a way I’d never been when kissing a boy before. I mean, kissing had felt nice, but it wasn’t like this. It didn’t make me feel like tearing all my clothes off and begging Rhys to put his mouth on more places than just my lips.

I let out a small moan, but it must’ve been louder than I expected because Rhys pulled away, his breathing just as fast as mine. He pressed his forehead to my cheek and swore under his breath. “Christ, Charli. ”

I shifted a little beneath him, shocked when I felt the hardness in his pants brush my stomach. I wanted to lower my hand and feel him properly, but I was too scared.

“Don’t stop, please,” I whimpered, my mouth seeking his, and he groaned. I was the aggressor this time, my tongue snaking past his lips as I tasted him. I couldn’t get enough. I could lie on the floor with him all night and never tire of kissing him.

My hand finally loosened on his shirt, and I lowered it down over his stomach. I felt him shudder, and I was about to summon the courage to palm his very evident erection when, suddenly, he grabbed my hand.

“Don’t,” he grunted, breaking the kiss, his blue eyes almost pleading. “If you touch me I can’t guarantee I won’t embarrass myself.”

“I don’t care. Whatever happens, you don’t need to be embarrassed, not with me. I just want to feel you,” I said, trying to break free, but his grip was too firm. I was awash with desire, my lids at half-mast as my gaze pleaded with him. His other hand came up, caressing my cheek.

“You should see yourself right now. You’re like a dream. So fucking beautiful.”

My heart shimmered at his words and the worshipful look in his eyes. I pressed my lips to the underside of his jaw and felt him shiver as I began kissing my way back to his mouth. Then, suddenly, the door sprang open, and Aidan stomped back in.

“Okay, I definitely heard someone this time. Show yourselves.”

Rhys and I broke apart. My lips felt kiss swollen, and my skin continued to tingle from the memory of his mouth on me. Aidan walked about the room before his head appeared over the top of the couch.

“Well, what do we have here? A very cosy little hiding spot. I fecking knew I heard voices in this room.”

Being found in this position with Rhys was damning. Aidan arched an eyebrow at me like his theory about me planning to steal Rhys’ virtue had been proven correct.

“Congratulations, you found us,” I said, suddenly overcome with shyness and unable to look either Rhys or Aidan in the eye as I sat up. I was also annoyed he’d interrupted the best few minutes of the summer so far.

Rhys rose to stand then reached down to pull me up with him. His warm palm slid across mine, and I could almost forget Aidan was in the room when our eyes connected. It was only then I realised he hadn’t said yes or no to my proposition.

Though, surely, the kiss meant he was on board.

“Right, now I just have to find Derek and Milly,” Aidan said, glancing between Rhys and me. “They’re probably hiding together as well, smooching away in a quiet corner just like you two.”

Ah, hell. Was it that obvious we’d been kissing? Self-consciousness trickled in because if Aidan knew, then there was very little chance he was going to keep his mouth shut. Everyone else would find out, and Derek was probably going to give me one of his disappointed looks.

Just wonderful.