Roll For Initiative

67. Cassie

D octor Adams comes walking back in smiling, but with a hesitant look on his face.

"Hello, Cassie. How are you feeling now? We did not push too much pain medication; your boyfriend explained your situation and was very insistent on your preferences. So we were very cautious about respecting your wishes, but if you need more, please let a nurse know." Boyfriend? I look at Lucian, who is blushing. He told them he was my boyfriend. I can’t help the smile spreading across my lips. I glance back to the doctor.

"How bad is it? I haven’t even looked.” I chuckle. The doctor tries to keep a straight face, but I can tell it isn’t good.

"Well, to start, you were in a coma for two weeks and four days. It gave your body time to heal, but I won’t sugarcoat it; you have a long road to full recovery. But it can be done! From what I can already see, you have a great support system, and that is one of the most important parts."

He blows out a huff of air. Is it really that bad? He picks up the chart on the end of my bed.

"Ok, so do you want to start from the top or bottom of the list?" He asks me.

"Um. Whichever is least damaged, I guess.” Work my way up to the worst shit.

"Ok, so bottom. All right, your right knee and both hips were out of place. Umm." He glances at Jayme and Lucian.

"It’s okay. They can hear whatever it is; they probably already know." I tell him with confidence. I’m not going to hide what Theo did to me; everyone will know what a monster he is. He will not be able to run from this, and no amount of money will protect his ass.

"Ok, well, you had severe bruising internally; you also had a hairline fracture on your pelvic bone. And lacerations internally as well." He gives me a moment to process. "Your vertebrae are bruised, but nothing was broken or fractured in your spine. Your ribs were very damaged, though. Four were broken. There are some pins and other hardware we used to fix them. One of the broken ones chipped off and pierced your lung, so we repaired that surgically. The punctured lung was deflated almost completely; thankfully, they got you here in time. No other organs or arteries were pierced. That would have caused massive internal bleeding." He pauses again, looking at all the stuff on my chart.

"There are cuts, bruises, lacerations, and hematomas all across your entire body. They are healing, but some are very deep. The hematomas can take longer to heal. Only the lacerations on your thighs and back needed multiple stitches. We just sealed the rest with butterfly bandages or surgical glue. We need to watch all the cuts and lacerations to ensure no infection occurs. There is also now your incisions from all the surgeries you’ve had to repair everything. Your kidneys had blood in them. You were also dehydrated and malnourished. Your previously sprained fingers were broken, and your wrist was snapped. That was surgically repaired as well. The other hand was fractured, and a few fingers were out of place. Your pinky was snapped in half. You are going to need physical therapy for your hands." He pauses. "Ok, here’s where it gets a bit rough. Do you want time to process before we continue or are you ok? I know that hearing the extent of the injuries can bring back the trauma, and I don’t want you to panic."

"No, I’m ok. Please continue." I stammer. Lucian gently places his hand on top of mine. As panicked as I should be right now, he is keeping me calm. He gives me a loving smile, then leans and kisses my forehead. God, he is perfect. The beard makes him look even hotter.

"Ok, your collarbone was broken, which is also repaired now. I can give you a full list of how many pins and screws we had to use if you would like."

"So basically, no going through metal detectors." I laugh. He chuckles and nods.

"Your neck, thankfully, was only severely bruised, with no collapsed windpipe or busted vertebrae in your neck. Your face and the back of your skull are the worst. You had two teeth knocked out and three chipped. Your jaw was not broken, just severely bruised. Both of your left cheek and your left eye socket were broken from blunt force. Your cheekbone was the worst. You have multiple cuts on your face as well. The back of your skull was cracked open. Honestly, it is a miracle you didn’t bleed out." He glances at Jayme and Lucian. "They got to you just in time. A few minutes longer, and the paramedics might not have been able to save you."

He pauses, letting it all sink in. He lets me process that for a moment, just how close I was to death. Lucian can feel my body start to tremble, so he puts his arm around my shoulders.

"Miss Miller? Do you want me to continue?"

"There’s more?" I ask. Shocked. What else could be worse?

"Just a few things." He patiently waits as I take a few deep breaths. Calm Cassie. It is going to be ok.

"Please continue." I can feel my body trembling. Can I even recover from this? Lucian kisses me and then presses his forehead against my temple.

"Good girl. You got this. You are so strong. We will get through this together, I promise." He whispers in my ear, sparking a new level of confidence in me.

"Ok, there was still some swelling on your brain on the last MRI. There is a burr hole in the back of your skull that we have been using to relieve the pressure. The swelling should be gone by now, but we want to run a few more tests to be fully sure. You will most likely have to attend physical therapy for more than just your hands. The attack affected Your Cerebellum, Occipital, and Parietal lobe. We have multiple tests that can be run to assess if you have temporary or permanent damage. Those parts of the brain control balance, spatial recognition, pain, speech, and muscle movements. You could also have a bit of trouble with short-term memory."

I sit there, contemplating everything. Can I even live a normal life after all this damage? The doctor must sense my trepidation.

"We will work to try to get you back to how you were, Cassie. Until the tests, it is unsure what side effects that you may have or how long they will last. It will take time, though; healing isn’t to be rushed. Do you live alone?"

"No, she’s going to be moving in with me," Lucian says, stunning me. Move in? Permanently?

"Good, she will need help with quite a lot for a while; the other option would be a rehabilitation center."

"God, no, I don’t want to stay in a rehabilitation center. Please. " I panic.

"Shh, it’s ok. You're coming home with me. I’ve already asked Ash and Sunny if they could pack up your stuff when you are ready. Don’t worry, I won’t let your mom help. I know how much you hate her touching your stuff." God, he knows me so well.

"Another thing, Miss Miller, once the swelling goes all the way down, you can talk to a plastic surgeon about the damage to your face. And I highly recommend talking to a therapist. We have a few in the hospital and some external ones I highly recommend. They specialize in your level of trauma. Please don’t bottle it up inside." He gives me a sympathetic look, not pity but understanding. He has seen situations like mine before.

"Thank you. I will think about it." I say. I’ve never been too keen on talking to a therapist. My mother sees one regularly, and look how she is, still a functioning pill addict.

"Please don’t hesitate to call for a nurse if you need any assistance or medication. I’ll be stopping back by tomorrow."

He walks out, leaving just us 3.

"Can I see a mirror?" I ask.

"Cassie, you heard what the doctor said..." I cut Lucian off.

"I want to see. I need to see what he did to me. Please." I gulp to swallow the nervous ball in my chest. Do I really want to see it when I’ve barely had time to process it? You might as well rip the band-aid off, metaphorically speaking, of course.

Lucian reluctantly gets up and grabs a compact mirror from my bag. I'm glad to see someone brought up some of my stuff.

I open it but pause. Taking a few breaths to clear my thoughts and prepare myself for what I’m about to see.

I lift the mirror, and my stomach flips. This can’t be me. My face is puffy and swollen still. Dark bruises that are fading to a yellowish-purple color cover almost my entire face. My left cheek looks deflated compared to the rest of my face. Damnit, he knocked out one of the bottom front teeth and a side one. The chipped ones are front and center. I’ll need caps put on to fix this shit. The worst part is my head. I thought my hair was wrapped up in a bun, but no. I have a shaved head. I touch my scalp and wince.

"They had to cut it all off because of the amount of stitches and the burr hole. They first only did a partial shave where there were patches all over, but as they continued, they deemed it necessary to shave it all." Lucian says. Sensing my disdain.

I shut the compact and whip it across the room. It shatters against the cabinet, missing Jayme by an inch. A loud, broken scream escapes me, baring my soul to the world. Why. Why did this happen to me? Lucian holds me close, mumbling calming words, but they have no effect right now. My world is shattering. My lungs struggle to take in any air. I can’t stop crying. Jayme sits on the other side of me on the bed and gently strokes my back. We stay like this for what feels like an hour. Their comfort and love are slowly helping me calm down. The tears have stopped, partially because I don’t think I have any more in me. My sobs and wails are more of soft hiccups now. I’m lying with my head on Lucian’s chest. Jayme is still sitting on the bed behind me, rubbing my back. I drift off to sleep. Maybe I will wake up and this all will have just been a nightmare.