Room One Hundred and Nineteen: Watching Her (Club Sin: Seattle Session 2)

Prologue

PROLOGUE

DR. JOSHUA ‘JOSH’ SILVER

I knew exactly where she was headed. I followed her. It was wrong on so many levels, but I couldn’t stop. I wasn’t even going to try.

Standing on the sidelines had not been easy.

Watching her.

Wanting her.

Craving her.

The only thing that brought me solace was the knowledge I wasn’t alone. My best friends were like brothers to me. More than the strangers I shared blood with, that was for sure. We’d seen it all, been through thick and thin, and no matter what, we stuck like glue. That’s why our little setup and situation was a little more, well, let’s say complicated.

She sat at a table at the far end of the cafeteria. The one that faced the floor-to-ceiling window and looked out toward the lush greenspace surrounding the Seattle hospital. The day was shockingly clear for once. But if you saw Elena Flores’ face, you would think there was a thunderstorm brewing out there. Worry and sadness etched her features.

I didn’t have to look behind me to know Rick Montoya was behind me, his eyes pinned on the woman of our dreams.

“She okay?” he asked in his deep voice, low enough so only I could hear. My gaze dropped to the floor then back to her.

“What do you think?” I asked quietly.

The seconds beat away, but we didn’t move. I doubt we fucking blinked. But then again, Elena did that to us. Captivated us, enthralled us in the most visceral, primal way possible. Her dark eyes focused outside in a distant look that told me she was totally zoned out, trying to calm her breathing.

“It was a tough call for her,” he noted. I grunted. “She should go home,” Rick clipped under his breath. If only it were that easy. Our woman was a stubborn one. Not that she even knew that she was ours. Yet, a voice chimed up. Yet, it repeated with hope. We had to play it smart. Our situation was different than most. Not just any woman, much less a single mom, would take up with three guys.

“You know she won’t be that easy to convince,” I warned, not that I had to. Rick knew her as well as I did.

“I know,” he muttered. “But we have to try.”

“I know,” I confirmed.

Ever since we started to work at the hospital and met the stern beauty who was our sweet little ER nurse, Elena had driven us mad. I could still remember that first day. There had been some kind of mandatory meeting for all the emergency room staff, and when she walked in, my hand immediately fisted at my side. Stark awareness of her and who she would one day become shot right through me. But the timing hadn’t been right. It still wasn’t. And that fucking killed.

“Where is Miles?” I asked.

“Where do you think?” Rick grunted.

“Working on Nurse Ratchet to help get Elena time off?” I guessed.

“Yup.” Yeah, the three of us were in sync when it came to taking care of our woman.

“Good.” I swallowed, my hand clenched at my side. Soon, I promised myself. Soon, we would be able to hold her close. Comfort her the way we wanted. The way we were meant to. The way she needed us to.

But it wasn’t time yet.

We were still sorting shit out with setting up our private practice. We needed to make sure her ex-douchebag husband couldn’t touch her or her kids. Not only was Elena ours, but her four-year-old twins were, too.

Men like us, like Miles, Rick and I, weren’t your typical doctors.

We’d seen too much. Had been through too much to be normal. We came as a team, in and out of the hospital. We figured out our friendship, one that had begun in sand-filled battlefields as medics, was different a long time ago. We had no qualms with it. We had come to terms with the way we operated a long time ago. We just hoped we could one day talk Elena into giving us a chance.

She was a single mom of two kids and had a lot on her shoulders. People would most definitely talk about our unorthodox arrangement, that was a given. Being a woman, she would be the one who would take the brunt of that, and maybe because of that, we had stuck to the sidelines so long.

To try and spare her.

To try and not feel what we felt for her.

But as I glanced at Rick, concern and worry were etched on his tanned face and lines marked his skin. He couldn’t hide what he felt when he looked at her. I knew that was impossible. Our waiting time was finally coming to an end. Thank fuck!

My gaze drifted back to her.

We loved her. We just had to figure out a way for her to love us back.

Elena chose that moment to look over at us. Rick and I stood side by side. I could only imagine what she thought. For a moment, I watched those gorgeous dark eyes sweep over us with appreciation behind the wire-rimmed glasses she wore. But as soon as it appeared, she wiped it away, her beautiful face masked with stern indifference. Indifference I knew she was trying to hide behind. Indifference she used to protect her heart.

“Ready?” Rick asked under his breath.

“For her? Always,” I muttered as we made our way toward her, hoping like hell we could talk her into going home early.

Working in the ER, we saw all sorts of things. Minor stupid shit to things that would sear your brain in a way you knew no matter what, it would never leave your head. And today’s call, a domestic abuse call where not only the mom but the kid had been in the asshole’s crossfire, was one of those calls.

And it had not ended well, no matter what we tried.

“Dr. Montoya, Dr. Silver.” She tightly smiled up at us. It didn’t reach her sad eyes. “Did you need?—"

“Mind if we sit?” I asked, cutting her off. She pressed those perfect lips of hers together and shook her head. Rick and I didn’t play fair either. Instead of sitting in front of her, we flanked her at each side. Her head turned back and forth like she couldn’t believe we were surrounding her.

“You okay?” I asked. The cafeteria was quieter than normal, and thankfully, there were no eyes on us to take in how we sat together.

“I’m fine,” she quickly answered. Just like I knew she would. I heard her breath hitch. I looked down and realized why. Rick, fucking greedy-as-hell Rick, had grabbed her hand and was gently holding it in his big inked-up paw.

“You sure?” he asked. I watched her give him her attention. I was always so damn surprised when I saw her next to one of us. She was so small next to him. Next to me. Next to Miles.

I remembered that first time I saw her. Walking down the hall and straight to that damn conference room in her light blue scrubs. Her long, dark brown, almost black hair set in a low bun at her neck. Those cute little roundish wire-rimmed glasses on the tip of her nose.

I’d felt like something shot me.

Like a blue-flamed arrow pierced right through me and not just knocked me out but pushed through my heart. A heart I hadn’t been sure I actually had. Then, when she’d walked straight to us and introduced herself, I took liberties of my own that day. Reaching and taking her hand in mine. I’d wondered how someone so small with such delicate features could handle working not just the tough hours of an emergency room but be strong enough to deal with the shit that happened there.

I had learned fast just how strong she was. Not just mentally but physically. Then it was like a goddamn domino effect. Every little morsel I discovered only made me hungrier and needier for more.

“It wasn’t a fun call, that’s for sure,” she admitted, with an edge to her voice. One that made it feel like all my senses went on high alert.

“I’d rather have that guy with a Hot Wheels stuck inside of him come in again,” Rick teased, and that earned him a small smile and sigh.

“Yeah, me too,” she said. “That could have been me. With the twins,” she said out loud, probably what had been bombarding her brain since she ran off on her break. And whether she knew it or not, she had just given us a little bit of herself. A part we had suspected but hadn’t been sure of until now.

“It wasn’t,” I said steadily, confidently. “You got out of that situation,” I reminded her, and because I was an asshole who was starving for her touch and couldn’t help himself, I grabbed her other hand. Instead of looking at me or pulling it away, she rested her head on my shoulder and stared outside.

Somehow, by some stroke of luck, Elena was drawn toward us, too. We had quickly become friends, sharing meals and breaktimes. Shit she thought was just coincidental when we had actual fucking meetings at home, arguing and fighting over how to get our next hit of our favorite little addiction.

One night, she had surprised us by asking us to join her for a beer at the bar closest to the hospital. There, after two drinks, she shared all about her rocky marriage. The shit show it had been and the asshole who had sired her babies. She’d gone on and on about her twins. I was pretty sure that just seeing the love she had for them, how softly she spoke about them, and the adoration she felt for them made us fall in love not only with her but them as well that very night three months ago. After dropping her off, we went home and made a decision.

She would be ours.

The missing piece in our lives, the one we thought we would never be lucky enough to find.

We knew she was attracted to us. She might not have admitted it to herself; that was still yet to be seen. But it didn’t matter. Rick, Miles, and I were not afraid of hard work. We knew the guts it took to be dedicated. Disciplined.

For the last ninety days, we had been watching. Waiting for our moment. And I had a feeling it was finally inching closer.

Rick kept talking to her softly. Stroking her hand the same way. Wet hit my shoulder and burned through my scrub top from her tears.

“You should go home and take the rest of the day,” I gently coaxed. She scoffed.

“I can’t do that. I can’t run off after every tough call.” She sniffled. Her words sounded almost like she was angry with herself. Our beautiful tough girl was so damn strong. And so damn hard on herself.

“Come on, who do you think you’re talking to?” Rick asked, a little firmer than he usually spoke to her. I felt her turn her attention toward him. “You don’t ever run away. I saw you the day of that multiple car crash. Or the day that fire in that warehouse brought in all those workers. You don’t ever run off. But today? Today was hard. Next time something like that comes in, even though I sure as fuck hope no one ever has to go through that kind of shit again, you won’t need to,” he said gently and kept talking. “But we all know that crap is too hard to shoulder and push down. We need to deal with it in the moment so we can keep moving forward. And the best way for you to do that today is to go home, be with your babies and soak in that it wasn’t you. Thank fuck it wasn’t. You’re still here, and they’re here. Everything, and I swear to you on my mama’s grave, everything will be okay.”

“You can’t promise that, Rick.”

“I can,” he argued, and I nodded.

“He can. I can. Fuck, if Miles were here, he would, too,” I chimed in.

She turned slowly, giving me those deep soulful eyes. From close up, she looked so much younger than her thirty-two years. Softer than she carried herself. A lot of the other doctors and nurses thought she was mean. A hard-ass. But the three of us knew that wasn’t the case. Not at all. If they knew our woman was nothing but sweet honey all the way through, they would be fucking shocked. But she was. She just didn’t let anyone see it. Not usually, at least. Life had taught her to keep that part of her to herself. And it would be a damn hard job to help her learn she didn’t need to do that.

One Miles, Rick, and I were more than prepared to take on.

“Take the rest of the day,” I gently repeated Rick’s words. “Go home. Hang with Mike and Betsy. Maybe go to the park,” I suggested. She opened and shut her mouth, but there was something in her eyes. Something that made me hope I somehow said the right thing.

“You’re right. Okay,” she quietly agreed. “If I can talk Tabitha into letting me go early, I will.”

“No need to talk her into anything,” Miles’ velvety voice sounded, and we turned around.

“What did you do?” Elena asked, and just like that, the small, sweet bubble we had found ourselves in popped. She pulled her hands out of our hold and stood up. Even with us sitting down, I was still a little taller than her. I watched her put her hands to her hips and scowl at Miles.

“I talked to Tabs for you. You’re welcome.” I winced. Miles had the tact of a fucking feral cat. She opened her mouth, probably to tell him he shouldn’t have done that, but he put his hand up. His bright blue eyes were set on her.

“We all know that was a lot. It was a lot for everyone, but being the only one who worked that call who actually has kids, I figured you would need some time. Your shift is almost over anyways. She was fine with it. She was even going to come find you to tell you, you should take off early.” Rick and I glanced at one another before returning our attention to Elena, not sure if he was bullshitting that last part.

Her shoulders dropped in defeat like the air had been deflated from her, and she wrapped her arms around herself. “Thank you,” she mumbled. “I’m gonna go get the kids. See you guys around.” She gave us a small wave then, without looking at us again, she disappeared out of the cafeteria. Probably going directly to the locker room to get her shit before heading down to the hospital’s daycare center to pick up her twins.

Rick and I stood and glanced at Miles. “What?!” he exclaimed.

“You’re an idiot,” Rick mumbled.

“Yeah, maybe. But I get shit done.” Both Rick and I rolled our eyes at him. Rick sighed heavily. I turned toward him. He ran his hand through his closely cut dark hair before pinching the bridge of his nose.

“This crap is getting old,” Rick huffed. “We can’t keep doing this. We need to make a move, and fast.”

“Rick.” I sighed. I got where he was coming from. It sucked watching her struggle when we could make things easier. “She needs time.”

“She needs help,” he clipped. My jaw clenched.

“You don’t think I know that? You don’t think it burns me from the inside out to see her struggle? Huh? I know we can make it all better. Make her life so much easier,” I gritted through my teeth.

“Then what the fuck are we waiting for?” he asked.

“You know what we’re waiting for,” Miles cut in, and the two of us glanced at him.

“Fine.” Rick’s shoulders slumped. “I’m gonna get a coffee. You guys want anything?”

“No.” “No thanks,” we answered, and Rick made his way to the cafeteria.

“You going to go make sure her car starts this time?” I asked Miles. He nodded, patting me on the shoulder before he walked away, moving his happy ass down to the parking lot.

I turned and looked out the window she had been staring through. Trying to make out what she was looking at. Nothing in particular probably. That’s when my brows bunched. I looked at the glass, and my head tipped to the side before I looked behind me, then back out the glass.

Surprised to know that with the sun shining the way it was, you had a clear reflection of where Rick and I had been standing and watching her.