Second Chance Baby (Crescent Cove #18)

Chapter 3

THREE

This day was off to a rocking start.

I was rolling across a bed with the woman I’d been in love with since I was a teen. Actually, I didn’t remember when I hadn’t loved her.

Which was why it had been painfully easy for me to whisper instructions to her before the shoot had begun. I’d been fully prepared for her to shoot me down flat.

She had not.

“Rita really needs this shoot to be, well, like high school us. I heard some stuff in the industry about a breakup with her writing partner. Didn’t pay a huge amount of attention, but now that it has to be reshot, anyway…well, let’s just sell it well. Okay?”

She’d nodded and placed her hand so, well, lovingly in mine, her summer sky eyes conveying nothing but trust.

And then it had been on.

Now we were nothing but strangers who happened to be parents. And our little girl was the best thing that had ever happened to me—after her mother.

Her mother who’d dropped me cold and basically skipped out on raising our child with me. She’d just started not responding to me and seeming as if she was miserable. Then she’d screamed she needed a break. And that had been it.

She was on top of the modeling world, and I was just the high school boyfriend who’d accidentally impregnated her when the damn condom broke.

But we were still rolling across a bed together. Touching each other as if we were used to doing it every day—and once upon a time, we had been.

Here and now, there was no anger between us. When that photographer had said, “go,” we’d gone at each other like wild animals, as if the room wasn’t full of people, though it absolutely was. Many techs and assistants, plus both of our agents, that lech of a cameraman, and countless others.

My mind had been in a haze since we’d originally locked gazes, and I’d taken in every one of her sexy as hell curves in her low-cut jersey dress. The silky material had clung to her breasts and hips like a lover, and if a man could be jealous of a damn dress, then I was.

Bad enough I’d envied how she’d talked to my brother. Not like she’d flirted with him. That wasn’t Bridget. She’d never been the type of girl to try to elicit that kind of reaction from me. She’d always been a straight-shooter who kept things real. No games. No subterfuge. Exactly why I’d fallen so hard for her.

But she’d bought and read all his books. And that was unexpected.

It had been a damn long time since I’d been surprised. Today was full of them.

Now we were kissing as if we’d been shot headfirst into the past. We weren’t tiptoeing around one another to not upset the delicate balance between us. The one thing we always agreed on was that Carrington was our sole focus, so we worked hard at keeping the peace.

Treating each other with respect and basically kid gloves so none of the emotions we’d battled back for years had a chance to slip free.

Or the emotions I’d battled back. She’d never seemed to have any in my direction. Bridget seemed to slip on a cool emotionless mask so easily when it came to me—to us .

But she loved our little girl. Every time she saw her, she gave her the biggest hugs and then asked her so many questions about her life. All the details she should get to witness on a daily basis.

If she was here. With us. Like she goddamn should be.

“Cut!”

Breathing hard, I dragged myself back from her and realized I’d ripped open the bodice of her dress. Just torn it away from one of her full, glorious breasts as if we were alone in this crowded room.

Which we absolutely were not.

Holy shit, my cock was hard enough to rip through my damn jeans.

“Okay, we’re probably going to have to reshoot this. Can’t have skin flashing. Not that kind of book cover. Unless we can do heavy edits.” Drake coughed his way through a lascivious laugh. Everyone else had gone stone silent.

I looked up at the sudden flurry of activity as the room cleared out with barely a word, just the occasional mutter or soft apology before Drake and the two of us were the only ones left. “Fuck it,” he said, throwing up his hands before he followed everyone else.

Leaving us alone in the silence only broken by our heavy breathing.

She didn’t move to cover herself or make any effort to tug the dangling piece of material back into place. She just stared up at me with her heavy blue eyes, her wet lips parted, and her ruby lipstick smeared all over her chin. I couldn’t imagine what I looked like right now.

Honestly, I didn’t give a shit.

I opened my mouth to speak but she reached up to grab my face before I could. “Do not apologize. Got it? Do. Not.”

“But I was rough. Your dress?—”

“I loved it. Every minute. I have more dresses. Many more you can rip up and destroy, and you do not ever have to apologize.” Then she released a throaty laugh. “Well, actually I lied. Yes, you do, but only if you don’t finish what you started here.” As if she was imparting a great secret, she brushed her mouth over my ear. The past and the present were tangled up in my brain. “My panties are soaked.”

“Let’s see.” I ignored every alarm bell clanging in my head as I reached down to flip up her dress. She didn’t make a sound as I brushed the back of my fingers over the drenched panel guarding her from me. The noises that left me were barely human. Before I could talk myself out of it, I violently tore down her panties and tossed them over my shoulder before I fell between her legs like a starving man.

Yanking her to my lips felt like a miracle.

The best kind of fever dream.

I closed my eyes, taking in a deep breath of her scents that were both somehow familiar and so, so different. She’d always had a faint scent of vanilla, some kind of shampoo or perfume, and now it layered over her arousal so sweetly. So seductively. At the first swipe of my tongue, she reared up, babbling something I didn’t recognize. Her fingers wove into my curls just in case I had any inclination to move before I finished this very important task.

Devouring her whole.

The scrape of her nails over the back of my neck as I sucked on her clit made me growl. I slid up my arms to band over her stomach, holding her in place while I ate her hungrily. As if I was dying of hunger and she was the only sustenance in sight. She arched against my lips, thrashing restlessly as I levered downward to slide my tongue lower and lower still, slipping into the place that was practically dripping for me.

Rotating my hips, I ground into the mattress to try to release some of my frustration, but the bedding just wouldn’t do. Neither would stopping before I made her let go.

“In my mouth, dammit. Don’t you dare hold back on me.” I followed up my demand with two fingers that I shoved into her hard and fast. Knowing from her broken gasps how close she was and wanting to savor every damn drop. Her walls fluttered around my fingers as I pumped them in and out, using her cries as my roadmap. My mind blanked as I focused on her reddened cheeks and the way her breaths quickened, turning into a plea I never could’ve denied her.

“Now. Please. Travis. ”

I didn’t know what she wanted for sure. It had been so long and the days where I’d known what she needed before she voiced it were far in the past. But I had wants too. And I couldn’t wait any longer.

Keeping my mouth on her, still sucking hard on her clit while my fingers upped the pace inside her, I managed to undo my jeans one-handed. Sweat blinded me as I reared up to line myself up with her pussy, finally dragging my hand away as her body convulsed.

And I plunged.

The instant I bottomed out inside her with a groan I couldn’t stifle, her deep blue eyes opened and locked on mine. And she reached down to grab both cheeks of my ass, digging her nails into my flesh as she hauled me into her with the sweetest cry.

The past and the present blended until I couldn’t be sure what I said. Or how.

Then I was stroking into her as if it was my job. Hell, my life’s work. I kissed her swollen lips while I reached down to circle her clit, needing her to come again while I was inside her. Fucking her as if I’d never done anything as important in my thirty-six years on this planet.

Or ever would again.

She kept her grip on my ass with one hand while she slapped the other cheek. My eyes flew open and met hers, a laugh shared between us as she shrugged and did it again. My cock jerked inside her, my balls drawing tight and warning me this show was going to end soon. I bit the side of her neck, relishing her sharp cry as her pussy twisted around me, her spasms quickly overtaking her.

Getting me so wet that holding on was a fantasy.

I managed to draw back enough that my release was half in and half out, making a beautiful mess of her that I couldn’t resist moving down to taste. Us mixed together was exactly the fucking way it should be.

She made a soft noise I couldn’t identify until I lifted my head to zero in on her face.

Her gorgeous eyes were overflowing.

“Did I hurt you?”

She shook her head, tears dripping down her cheeks. “Not at all.”

The last embers of afterglow died as I crawled up her body to pull her into my arms. To my utter shock, she kept right on crying, burrowing into me as if she never wanted me to leave.

I didn’t want to. But this wasn’t high school. It wasn’t the years after, either. Our days together were long over, and now she didn’t even live here anymore.

She’d moved out of the house I’d gotten for us while I’d been away on a job. “Easier that way,” she’d whispered the first time she’d come to visit afterward.

Then she’d locked her feelings down behind that mask of indifference I’d seen her mother wear the one and only time I’d ever met her. Even in her presence, Bridget had seemed so very different from the loving girl I’d known.

Then that stranger had stepped into our lives and never, ever left.

Bridget was whispering now too as she rolled away from me to gather up the pieces of her dress. “Can I borrow your jacket?”

“Sure.” I could barely speak with my dry, aching throat. “Brig, baby?—”

Her gaze flew to mine at the endearment, but I couldn’t say any more. I didn’t know what time it was, but we’d been rolling around for what felt like hours before we’d finally lost all control.

I had to go get Carrington.

I must’ve said it aloud because she gave me a light shove. “Go.”

At a loss, I went.

I didn’t know what else to do. I wanted to apologize. To tell her I wasn’t going to just duck and run.

But in the end, that was exactly what I did.

I climbed out of bed, quickly diverting my gaze from the tangled sheets to the few clothes tossed around us. I hadn’t lost anything other than my jean jacket, and she’d pushed my shirt off my shoulders. That was all.

I’d had more finesse as a damn teen.

Luckily, she didn’t call me on it. Just snatched up my denim jacket and pulled it on over her dress, tugging the sides together to do up the buttons before she fumbled on her heels. But she didn’t wait for me to split. Instead, she did the honors, rushing to the door and then through it before I had even a moment to gather my thoughts.

Just as well, because I didn’t really have any. The rapid-fire orgasm had left my mind blissfully blank.

For however long that lasted.

I grabbed my wallet off the floor where it had somehow fallen, as had my keys. Then I hauled ass out of the room and down the grand sweeping staircase, not making eye contact with anyone as I aimed for the glass doors. I didn’t look anywhere but at my cowboy boots—why the hell had I chosen them today, anyway— as I aimed for my truck parked against the curb up the block.

The instant I was inside it, I blasted some random rock station and got the hell out of Dodge at a speed not anywhere appropriate for the Cove, especially considering the police station was right nearby.

And so was my fucking pain in the ass older brother, who assumed just now would be a fine time to pull me over.

To mess with him, I ignored his lights and sirens. I also didn’t cut my speed as I just freaking kept going in the direction of Turnbull, letting him sit on my bumper if he wanted to waste some time today. I was way too early to pick up Carrington, after all, so might as well get myself a ticket so I could donate to the town budget.

Why the hell not?

Finally, I slowed up some. Not because I was scared of Christian. Also, not because I had any hope of avoiding a ticket. I knew my brother. He’d never let me go if he could make an example out of me. And he was probably even right in this case.

After another mile or two, I blew out a breath and signaled as I veered over to the side of the road. I got out my license and registration so I could shove them his way when he appeared at my door, glowering silently.

“Thank you,” he said in a clipped voice, making a show of checking both. “Do you know how fast you were going, Travis?”

“Yep.” I gripped the wheel unrepentantly.

“Do you know you didn’t signal before you pulled out of your parking space?”

“Also, yep.”

“What do you have to say for yourself?”

“Just give me my fucking ticket, okay?”

He slapped his ticket book against his hand, and then he cocked his head, staring down at me. “What’s wrong?”

“I just felt like speeding and not signaling and now I feel like getting my ticket for same. So, out with it. Skip the lecture.”

Instead of lecturing, he just repeated his question softly. “What’s wrong, Trav?”

I blew out a breath as I leaned back against the headrest. “I slept with Bridget.”

His jaw locked as he removed his aviators long enough for me to see the wide flare of his pupils. “Bridget who?”

“You know Bridget who. My ex. Carrington’s mother.” I gripped the wheel hard enough for the leather wrap around the wheel to crack—or maybe that was just my imagination. The move certainly fit my now dark mood.

So much for my freaking blissfully blank mind. Gone like the dang wind.

Gone like my ex. Again.

Did I not have any sense? A guy had to wonder.

“You know, it’s bad enough making a mistake once. If it was a mistake. But making it twice…” I whistled and dropped my head back to lay on the headrest. “I’m a fucking moron.”

“Listen, dude, I pulled you over, so I get to spit the insults at you, not the other way around.”

I gestured to him. “So, go ahead. Time’s a-wasting. Floor is yours.”

“You are anything but a moron. So, shut the hell up.”

It was rare enough for Christian to swear that I shut the hell up. Not like I was saying anything worthwhile just now in any case.

“Why did you sleep with her?”

“What’s the usual reason?” I gave a jerky shrug. “All I’ve had for company for quite a while is my left fist.”

“Try again.”

“She’s fucking beautiful and seeing her again grabbed me by the damn throat. And we had to act out this cover and we just sold it. Too well, I suppose.”

“Keep going.”

“We had to roll around a freaking bed together and since I had absolutely no problem with having every inch of her up against me, I figured why not.”

“And…”

“And fucking what?” I exploded. “Isn’t that enough for you, Happily Married Asshole?”

He tipped his hat to me. “That’s Mr. Happily Married Asshole to you.”

I had no choice but to laugh. “Why not Officer while you’re at it?”

“Not gonna kick you while you’re down.”

Instantly, I sobered. I was down. Didn’t even realize how much yet since I hadn’t taken time to think. And I had no intention of doing that until I absolutely had to.

Maybe not until I was dragged into it, kicking and screaming.

But that didn’t mean I’d admit it, even to my older brother. “Who says?” Deliberately, I made my voice lighthearted while I smirked. “Though I did go down, if that’s what you mean.”

My all-too-serious brother didn’t take the bait. “You don’t have to lie to me, Trav.”

“Oh, I’m not lying. I did so happily?—”

“You know what I mean. You don’t have to pretend it’s all just a hot time with me. Who would understand better than I would?”

I released a long, slow breath. “Not at all, man. There’s no comparison between us. Yeah, you had a kid with a chick, but you got over her just fine. And now you have your daughter in your life, and you’re tight. The woman doesn’t even matter anymore since you have Honey?—”

“The ‘woman’ as you called her will always be my daughter’s bio mom. Which means she will always matter to Reagan, regardless of my current non-relationship with her birth mother. We had one long enough to make a baby, so that matters.”

I raked a hand through my hair and dropped my head into my hands. “God, don’t listen to me. I’m sorry, man. I didn’t mean to sound so damn callous—or bitter. But I am. I didn’t realize how much I was until today, actually. I’ve just been seething with bitterness all this time, and I had no idea at all until I was confronted dead in the face with all I lost.” I shook my head. “Forget what I lost. With what just walked away from me because I wasn’t enough to build a life with, I guess. Hell if I know.”

And that was the worst thing. I didn’t know. We’d tried to have conversations like rational adults a few times way back when, but once our daughter had come along, almost every conversation we’d ever tried to have seemed to end in angry silence or shouts or insults or some combination of the above.

Eventually, we’d just stopped trying at all.

But we’d kept fucking each other long afterward. Because that was the one area we’d never had an issue with.

Apparently, we still didn’t even all these years later.

How stupid was I?

“You’re not stupid, man. Stop saying that.”

I looked at him in wonderment. “Did I say that aloud or are you now reading minds?”

His mouth quirked, showing his usually hidden dimples that were far too much like mine. “You said it out loud. Though I wouldn’t hesitate to apply for a raise if I had that to put on my resume.”

I laughed. “Yeah, I just bet. Budget cuts wouldn’t be a factor then.”

“Indeed not.”

For the millionth time, I marveled that all five of us looked like we’d had some wild DNA split to form each of us in the same damn mold. Same oversized builds, all shades of blue eyes, and hair blonder than not.

Well, except Penn. Dark-eyed and dark-haired, he was the anomaly in the family. I was pretty sure he looked like one of our uncles. Maybe Dad’s brother Bartholomew, where Penn had gotten his middle name.

Genes were wild.

And Maddie was clearly a woman, and while she was on the taller side, she was slight too, so she was a bit different than the four of us guys. But she looked more like us than not.

Personality-wise? We were all definitely unique.

Half of us had started on the closer to grouchy side of the spectrum when it came to Christian and Penn. But Murphy, and me, and Maddie, had all been more easygoing sorts by nature.

Until recent years when I’d edged uncomfortably closer to that grumpy line against my will.

I tried like hell to keep my nature as even as it had once been, but it was becoming harder every year. Once upon a time, I’d laughed as easily as I breathed. I always tried to look on the brighter side of life, and I wasn’t one to assume bad things were going to happen.

Now, I mostly saved my cheerful side for my little girl. She was my bright spot in every cloud, and so was my family—when they weren’t writing me a ticket. Genetically, I’d freaking lucked out, and I reminded myself that daily.

I knew too many people who weren’t as blessed as I was family-wise. I’d grown up fighting over nonsense with them like any other guy with siblings, but as we’d grown older, I’d realized I basically had four built-in best friends.

I didn’t take that for granted.

“Look, man, I know we don’t talk as much as we used to. I know you’re so busy with your new wife and your baby and Rea, but I just wanted you to know how much I appreciate you. I fucking lucked out in the sibling department, and maybe I don’t say it enough.”

“You think you can avoid a ticket if you butter me up?”

I grinned. “Is it working yet? Because I can keep buttering.”

“Oh, I know you can.” He slapped his ticket book against the back of his hand again. “C’mon, stop slacking, dude.”

“Nah, I’m not trying to skip the ticket. I earned it, fair and square.” I held up my palms. “I won’t even argue or plead it down in court. I did the crime, I’ll do the time.”

“Well, shit, now it’s no fun.” He grinned back at me, dimples winking. “I gotta say this, man. I don’t try to interfere in your business. But I have to say she did you wrong. From day one, you’ve been a stand-up father in every way. She didn’t give you a fair enough chance before she took off.”

I swallowed hard. “She kept saying she was scared. That she didn’t know what to do or how to handle any of it. Her mom had some kind of mental condition, and she never even wanted me to meet her. Why I only did that one time. Her mother in my presence seemed kind of like an ice queen.”

“Like Bridget became after she had the baby?” He frowned. “Could she have had bad postpartum symptoms? Honey sure did. Her doctor had to prescribe meds for her to even deal with that, and that was only possible because I have great insurance. You guys sure did not back then.”

I pinched the bridge of my nose. “I don’t know,” I said vaguely. “I remember something about her feeling bad, but I had no idea how to help so I didn’t ask too many questions. I admit that now. And sometimes, I’d just fallen back on what had worked early on…” My cheeks heated uncomfortably.

“Sex?” Christian asked, sympathy thick in his voice.

“Yeah. I didn’t know what else to do. I didn’t even know about postpartum shit.”

“Most guys don’t, man.” He patted my shoulder. “Takes practice and time and learning. None of us start out as experts there.”

“No,” I said miserably, a second away from thunking my head on the wheel in frustration.

Clearly, I’d fucked up. Big time. I’d failed to even realize how much until I’d started thinking back.

Something I’d fought to avoid since we had ended. I’d been afraid to.

Just in case I saw something I had done.

“I closed myself off too. I didn’t fully even realize that until just now.” I cleared my throat as my eyes filled. “I took off on the first job I could find that would take me out of her orbit. I didn’t want to watch her walk out of my life, so I didn’t. By the time I got back, she’d moved out. But I should’ve listened more. Tried longer. If she was scared, if she couldn’t handle what had happened to her physically, we could have gotten her help. Medication like Honey took.” I shoved a hand that shook through my hair. “Taking care of her was my job too. Not just caring for Care Bear.”

He didn’t say anything, proving I was on the right track. Not that I’d known that in my twenties or even in the intervening years. I hadn’t even considered I could hold any of the blame.

Instead, I’d focused on her occasional pre-planned visits with Carrington. I made sure to have them all timed out ahead of time. No spontaneity. And definitely no meetings that were about anything but our little girl.

Our relationship no longer existed, so we just let it go.

Then we’d come together today like a goddamn supernova. How was I supposed to let her go now?

I glanced at my phone, realizing I had to get a move on. It was almost time to pick up Carrington. No time for an impromptu therapy hour with my brother.

“You late?”

“Almost. It’s almost time for school to let out.”

“Go on ahead.” He shifted his feet, his ears pinkening at the tips as he dropped his aviators back into place. “If you need to talk to me, text me any damn time, okay? We can always get some beers at The Spinning Wheel. Can grab Moose too maybe.”

“And Penn,” I added. “He was at the shoot with Brig today. Well, not with her,” I added hastily. “I’m not sure why he was there, honestly. He was sniping at the romance writer chick.”

Christian rocked on his heels. “Ahh.”

“You know her?”

“Not really. Just had to deal with those two during a signing event at Every Line A Story. I’ve never seen Penn like that.”

“So, they have history?”

“I don’t think so. She’s a nice woman, though. Not sure why our big brother got so bent out of shape around her.”

“Your guess is as good as mine. I don’t know if he had the hots for her or what.”

“Penn?” Christian tipped his aviators down.

“I know. I met over the summer for the first cover shoot with whatever-her-name was.” I waved my hand. “The model I shot her book cover with for the calendar. Lots of drama with these romance authors.”

Christian huffed out a non-committal grunt.

“Why I’m back to do this again. Rita had to change the cover again because the replacement model got mouthy at an author convention. She definitely traded up for this photo shoot. Bridget is a thousand times hotter.” I cleared my throat as Christian started shifting his feet again, muttering something about Penn I couldn’t quite catch. “Just saying as a point of fact.”

“Uh-huh. Got it. Just point of fact.”

“I gotta call Penn. Something was definitely up there,” I said distractedly, fumbling with my phone.

When the hell had I put it on Do Not Disturb? Clearly, it was a good thing I had, considering how the shoot had gone.

Immediately, a flood of texts scrolled down my screen. I couldn’t even catch them all. But the one I zoomed onto right away was Bridget’s.

Before I could think twice, I clicked on it. Sent over a half hour ago already.

Bridget

I need to see Carrington. I’ll pick her up today at St. Agnes and take her for a milkshake or something then I’ll bring her back.

My vision blurred. Words tumbled out of my mouth before I even realized what exactly I was saying—or who I was saying them to. My brother was also a cop. “She’s taking my daughter.”