Shattered World (Shattered #3)

Chapter Seventeen

M urphy gently set me on my feet, his lips moving, but I couldn’t hear any words. I was no longer cold. I recognized the sight around me; we were back in the hotel lobby.

But my body was frozen, my mind a million miles away. Mina was dead. Mina was dead. No matter how I said the words, I couldn’t make myself believe them. How could she be dead?

My sweet friend. With her freckled face and a softness that this world hadn’t corrupted. She was gone. Dead.

Murphy’s face was replaced with Warner’s. I waited for his mouth to move, but it never did. He simply gripped my shoulders, his face inching closer to mine. His touch, the rough grip of his hands, shook me out of my stupor, grounding me back into this moment.

And his next words reminded me why I needed to keep moving forward. Why I couldn’t shut down.

“I will not lose you. Not when you are the only person in this world I have ever loved. Now move your ass.”

He didn’t give me a chance to respond to his words, not that I could in this moment. My soul was too raw, my heart too tattered to give him those words. But he had given me them anyway, knowing it was what I needed in this moment.

Shaking off thoughts of Mina’s kind smile, the room came into focus, a chaos of hurry. Rainer had opened Caroline’s office, pulling out drawers and flipping over the desk as he searched for an answer. We couldn’t stay inside this hotel long, not when Chandler probably had already sent people after us.

My eyes found Sasha next, standing still as a statue near the door. Walking over to her, I gripped her palm in mine, her fingers cold to the touch. Squeezing her hand, I pulled her away from the door.

I didn’t ask if she was okay, I knew she wasn’t. Truly, none of us would be okay, not entirely. But my touch spurred her on and together we walked into the office, pushing our morbid thoughts aside as we helped the others search through the mess of papers on the floor.

There didn’t seem to be enough time, not to look through it all, before someone walked through those doors. Thankfully, the universe seemed to be remorseful for the life it had taken from us and Aiden yelled us all over to his corner of the room.

Dropping to my knees beside him, I eyed the papers in his hands. Official documents, stamped with approval. Each document held an identification number, a name, and other information I didn’t bother to read.

“She had identities for everyone,” Rainer breathed, pulling the papers closer to his face. “Look at the number, Less.”

He shoved the papers into my hands as my eyes fell to the stamped number in the top right corner. The number that matched the bunker we had found underneath the museum.

My eyes closed tightly as I held the papers against my chest. These are what we had been searching for, the key to our way into the bunker. Mina had sacrificed her life for this and she would never be able to use them.

A ball of grief lodged in my throat and I handed the papers back to Rainer, not trusting myself to be rational and not rip them up in my anger. I knew we wouldn’t survive without them, but I was struggling for the will to live when death hovered over me.

“How many are there?” Warner asked the question none of us had thought of yet.

There were twenty-two people upstairs. Seven of us down here. I mentally chastised myself. Six, there were six down here.

“Ten. There’s ten,” Rainer stated.

A new weight fell on my chest. Ten would have been the perfect number. Without much thought, we would have grabbed Elizabeth and the twins and made our way to safety while we waited to enter the bunker.

But now there were only nine of us. And although we didn’t need to use all ten identities, that was one other person we could save. One more person who had a chance at a long life.

“How do we choose?” Sasha whispered, her voice hoarse from the tears that still fell.

Aiden wrapped an arm around her, pulling her close to his side. Murphy grabbed the papers from Rainer’s hand, giving each of us one, tucking three more into his pocket.

When there was only one left, he looked up at the ceiling. “We don’t. We let them choose. This isn’t on us. We won’t be like them, deciding who lives and dies.”

We all nodded, taking a single moment to let the information settle, for the grief to sit with us, before we sprung back into motion. There wasn’t time to break down, not yet.

Rainer refused to let us all go upstairs, in case Chandler’s men showed up, sprinting up the stairs to gather Elizabeth and the twins and leave Matthew with the final paper. My heart stuttered and started as we waited for Rainer, his body materializing only minutes later, a disheveled Elizabeth behind him.

The twins rubbed sleep from their eyes, Stephanie in her mother’s arms while Rainer carried Lucas. Blankets were wrapped around their sleepy bodies, not enough time for them to dress in their coats.

The doors to the hotel were still vacant and we all gathered, ready to brace the night. I had no clue where we were going, but the others seemed to have discussed a plan, no hesitation in their steps as they hurried across the sidewalk.

As we walked, Sasha’s hand found mine, the two of us clinging to each other as we both wished for another to be in our midst.

We walked for hours, the wind whistling between the buildings. My feet were frozen minutes into the trip, my fingers and ears not far behind, my nose twitching as each breeze passed. I didn’t know how much longer we could walk before we risked serious repercussions from the cold.

Thankfully, only another hour later, Rainer pushed into a building, ripping several wooden boards off that barred the door. There were no lights and since this building had clearly been desolate, the temperature barely warmed.

If there had been any light, I knew I would be able to see my breath, my teeth chattering through the cold. Stepping through the building, our feet quiet against the tiled floor, we stepped into a back hallway that held a staircase.

Warner took the lead, his gun raised, waiting for any sign of occupants, but there was none. At the top of the stairs, a living room sat, clearly the apartment of whoever had owned the shop beneath.

Two couches decorated the room, a few blankets thrown over the cushions. Warner perused the rest of the small area, informing us that there were two bedrooms and a bathroom.

Elizabeth and the twins took one of the bedrooms for the night. Before she escaped into the solitude, she pulled me into her arms, whispering her gratitude for not leaving them behind.

Sasha walked toward the second bedroom in a daze. I offered to go with her, but she shook me off, promising she only wanted to be alone.

My gaze followed her and I turned my pleading stare onto Aiden. She shouldn’t be alone. Not tonight.

“I got it. Get some rest,” he said, ruffling my hair as he followed Sasha into the room.

As the door shut behind him, I was left alone with my men. And although grief spread through me, I knew that if anyone was going to get me through this, it would be them.

“I’ll go take first watch,” Warner mumbled, brushing a hand across my cheek.

Before he could walk back down the stairs, I gripped his hand, pulling him toward me. His palm found my cheek once again, my lips pressing against his.

“I love you, Warner,” I whispered against his mouth. Time was too precious to not say the words. Not when they could be your last.

A small smile licked at his lips, pressing against mine, and then he backed away, throwing a wink over his shoulder as he climbed down the stairs.