The Dirty Saint (Dirty #1)

14. Chapter Fourteen

14

Chapter Fourteen

After

EZRA

“Ezra—”

“Stop talking,” I say as I pull out a chair across from my rapist’s father. “Otherwise, I’ll come over there, and I’ll break all of your fingers.”

Michael’s facial expression remains stone-cold.

So does mine.

“I know you sent Killian to my house.”

“I have zero clue what you’re talking about,” he says, looking me in the eye. “But I’m glad to hear that Mr. Morago is doing well.”

Before he can react, I grab the side of his head and bang it against the wall. As he goes to scream, I clamp my hand over his mouth to stop him.

“What did I say about talking,” I demand.

“I—”

“Oap. You did it again.” I slam his head against the wall a second time. He growls at me. “Maybe now you’ll start to think twice about disobeying my orders.”

Tears gather in the corner of Michael’s eyes, but he keeps them in.

“You see, Michael , I don’t appreciate people from my past breaking into my home to get to my son. It makes my mama-bear claws come out. I’m sure, as a parent, you can relate to those feelings.”

A wave of sorrow hits the bastard, nearly knocking him off balance.

“I—”

“I wasn’t done speaking. Anyhow, the next time you decide to send some psychopath after me and my child, I will come here, and I won’t hesitate to destroy you. I will make your life so fucking painful that you will be begging me to end it, but instead, I’ll torture you some more just to get a kick out of it. Because, Michael, the minute you involved my child is the exact minute I turned into a raging monster who can’t feel anything but deep, deep hatred. Call it my alter ego, if you will.”

I sit back down in the chair and cross my arms over my chest. My heart is hollering inside me, but I pay it no attention.

“You continue to fuck with my life, and I will end yours before you can blink your fucking eyes. And that is a promise.”

“I just wanted to get a chance to know my only grandchild,” he whispers.

“Noah is nothing like Caleb,” I say, that name feeling like poison on my tongue. “I’ve made sure of it.”

When I found out I was pregnant, I promised myself that I would raise my baby as a kind individual who respected others. He wouldn’t turn out to be anything like the demon that put him inside me.

Not over my dead body.

“Caleb should have gotten the chance to meet his child regardless of how you felt about him.”

I let out a look of utter disdain.

“How do you think Noah’s going to feel when he finds out his mother killed his father over a mistake?”

I let out a huff. “A mistake ? Is that how we’re referring to rape these days? As a mistake? No, Michael, what your son did to me was done out of his own free will. He made the decision to rape me all on his own.”

I refuse to be made to feel like Caleb’s actions were not a big deal; not just for me but for all of the other victims out there who have suffered.

“He was just a seventeen-year-old kid, Ezra. He didn’t know any better—”

“And why is that,” I snap. “After all, isn’t it a parent’s job to teach their children how to be good people?”

I recognize that Caleb’s decision is not Michael’s fault, but for him to insinuate that his son raped me simply because he didn’t know right from wrong is just as much an insult as it is cruel.

And I won’t have it.

“Michael, I loved your son with every piece of me. I would have flipped the world upside down for him because that is what you do when you fall for someone as deeply as I fell for him.”

I suck on my bottom lip until I can taste blood.

“I cried for so long after he left me alone behind those damn bleachers.”

I was embarrassed—at first—by my behavior. Caleb and I had made plans, and I just…Chickened out at the last second.

At least, that’s what I told myself every time I had a knife pressed to my wrist.

“I didn’t want to kill him. But he just kept taking and taking and taking, and I was too weak to handle it.”

I’ll admit I was broken beyond belief. But not just that, I was pregnant and growing a human in the body that he fucked with.

“People unfortunately get raped all the time, and I understand that. Really, I do. But we both know that there was a monster inside of your son that would be harder to tame as time passed, and I couldn’t have that around Noah.”

I did what I did for my child. And for me.

And I don’t regret a damn thing.

I was forced to pick a side, and I chose the one that would ultimately be my healer.

“You are a coward , Ezra,” Michael screams.

I nod and then lean closer. “I am also a mother.”

And I would rather die than put my son in any form of harm.

During

JOEY

Ezra lays her head on my chest, her eyelids fluttering as she tries to keep them awake. I kiss her forehead, rubbing her back with my hand. She coos, and it is a sound that fills my heart with joy.

“Hey, how’s that hand of yours,” She asks.

“It hurts like a bitch—you’ve got some strength in that sexy little body. But it’s healing. You don’t need to worry about it.”

“I’m sorry,” she says.

“Don’t be. It was my fault. My judgment was clouded, and I didn’t act appropriately.”

“Still.”

Ezra withdraws her cheek from my chest, sitting up. I prop myself on an elbow so I can get a better look at her.

“When I was seventeen years old, a man I cared for very much took advantage of me. We had been secretly dating for a few months, and then we decided to take the next step.

“Living with that pain and betrayal nearly killed me. And maybe, to some, you just get over it. You move on. But I didn’t get to. Not when he’s the father of your child, anyway.”

I nod, unable to direct my attention anywhere but her.

“I was newly pregnant with Noah when I was kicked out of the house. And because I couldn’t afford to spend my nights sleeping in hotels and I wasn’t making enough from my job at a fast food restaurant, I did the only thing I thought I could do.”

“You were a prostitute,” I say, remembering that discovery I had while doing my research on her.

She swallows. “I was. But I had no other choice. I was a young, lonely, expectant mother. And I wasn’t going to bring my child into a world that wasn’t stable.”

“Did any of them,” God, I can barely breathe just thinking about it, “Did they hurt you?”

“They did nothing to me that hadn’t already been done before.”

I pull Ezra into my arms, cradling her body as tightly as I can. I need her to know that despite all that has happened in the past, she is safe with me.

And I will never ever let anyone hurt her again.