The Duchess Takes it All

Chapter Twenty-Eight

“Where is she, Feldhagen?” Christian said, pacing the floor in the drawing room of the prince’s palace.

“Kitty assured me she would attend,” Frederick said. “She’ll be here, my lord. Never fear.”

Christian snorted and went back to watching the door, his pacing intensifying. Easy for Feldhagen to say. He’d married his love, had never lost that love, never had to have nothing but the slightest bit of hope held out that he might get her back but only if people and circumstances beyond his control aligned. Christian’s fear that he would lose Tamsin forever was a gnawing beast in his gut that would not cease until she was back in his arms.

Guests had been arriving for over an hour, and still there was no sign of his duchess. He needed to speak with her before his uncle made his announcement, and if she did not arrive soon there wouldn’t be time.

The door opened, and Christian turned, his heart in his throat. The sight of his uncle and brother did not diminish his anxiety. He had been waiting on them as well. More specifically, the contract that was carried in by his uncle’s solicitors moments later.

Prince Heinrich stopped before him while his men spread the document out on a table.

“Are you certain that this is the course of action you are set upon?” his uncle asked. “It is irreversible. Do you even know if your lady will accept you?”

No. He didn’t. He knew she loved him. But it might not be enough. Even so, even if she were to rebuff him… He couldn’t live with himself if he didn’t try. And this was the only way.

“I am sure, Uncle,” Christian said. In fact, he’d never been so sure of anything in his life.

“And you?” Heinrich said, turning to his brother Conrad.

Conrad looked at Christian, who gave him a slight nod before he also answered, “Yes.”

“Very well.” Heinrich went to the table and picked up the quill that his solicitor had readied for him, signing the document with his big scrolling signature. He then moved aside so that Christian and then Conrad could both sign below his name.

His uncle gave him a sad smile. “I cannot say that I’m not disappointed,” his uncle said. “But I do wish you happiness, nephew.”

“Thank you, Your Highness,” Christian said, smiling again.

Heinrich clasped his shoulders and gave him a kiss on both cheeks before marching out with his retinue trailing behind him. Conrad also came to him, and Christian embraced him warmly.

“Thank you, mein Bruder. I know your plans for your life did not include cleaning up my messes. I will never be able to repay you.”

Conrad smiled. “Be happy, Christian. That is repayment enough. One of us should get some happiness in his life, don’t you think?”

Before Christian could say anything, Conrad shook his head and held up his hand. “I did not mean that to sound as disheartening as it did. I am happy for you, Bruder. Truly. It is my pleasure to do this for you. And for me,” he said. “I’m not exactly coming out poorly this compromise.”

Christian laughed. “I do hope you find happiness as well, Con.”

Conrad gave him a sad smile. “As do I. Until then, you’ll just have to be happy enough for the both of us.”

He hugged his brother again just as Frederick hurried back into the room. “She’s here, my lord.”

Tamsin entered on his heels, and his heart shuddered to a stop. Good lord, but the woman took his breath away. The gown she wore hugged her shoulders and breasts, the simple lines and embellishments enhancing her natural radiance. Even the glittering gems at her throat and in her hair could not compete with the brilliance of her smile when she saw him.

“She is indeed worth every sacrifice.” Conrad smiled at Christian once more before turning to Tamsin. “It is an honor to meet the woman who has captured my brother’s heart,” Conrad said, turning that gentle smile on Tamsin, whose eyes widened as she looked back and forth between the two. “Your Grace,” Conrad said, giving her a deep bow before turning to leave.

Frederick backed out as well, leaving them relatively alone, aside from the servants who scurried to and fro.

“Christian?” she asked, once Frederick had closed the door between them. “What has happened?”

“You came,” he said, his heart full to bursting.

He reached out to brush a finger across her cheek, and she smiled, turning into the touch.

“I wish I had more time to explain it all but—”

The door opened again to admit a footman and several servants who were carrying dishes on their way through to the dining room.

The footman bowed. “I’m sorry to interrupt, my lord, but it is time.”

Christian cursed under his breath and turned to Tamsin. “We are out of time, mein Herz. I must know now…will you marry me?”

“What? But we can’t… I don’t understand…”

“My lord, I’m dreadfully sorry, but His Highness has already taken the dais,” the servant said.

“I’ll make haste,” Christian nearly growled, waving him off and turning back to Tamsin with a renewed urgency. He had to know her answer before any announcements were made. He wouldn’t force anything on her through the sheer power of a public display.

“If I can fix things, arrange matters so that we can legally marry, will you have me?” he asked again, his gut churning as he waited for her answer.

“My lord…” The footman’s voice had taken on a note of panic, but Christian ignored him…though he did take Tamsin’s hands, drawing her closer to the door.

“Christian, I don’t understand. We haven’t discussed—”

“I know, and I know it’s not fair to demand an answer, but I must know now.”

“But…I don’t—”

The footman interrupted again. “Please, my lord, I must insist—”

Panic radiated from her, and she looked up at him with tear-bright eyes. Christian deflated, his hope withering. But it had been unfair for him to ambush her like this. In the end, it mattered not what her answer was. His choice had already been made.

“My lord, they are announcing you.”

Christian grabbed her face and kissed her, letting his lips linger for as long as he dared. “It is all right, meine Herzogin. Do not fret.” He kissed her again and then sighed. “Come with me. I must stand by my uncle, but please, follow me.”

…

Tamsin hurried behind Christian as they left the antechamber for the ballroom. Christian cursed again at the sight of the Prince Regent introducing his uncle on the raised dais at one end of the room, his brother standing beside them, scanning the crowd.

They passed Georgie and Nigel, who fell into step behind them. And then Lavinia and her duke. Good. At least Tamsin wouldn’t be standing there by herself when the announcements were made.

Christian pulled her through the crowd until he reached the dais. She ignored the stares and the sudden whispers, the fans that whipped up to hide furiously moving mouths as word spread that she was not only in attendance, but in the company of the prince’s nephew.

Lord Feldhagen and Lady Kitty stood in the front, and Christian glanced at Lord Feldhagen—who nodded—before squeezing Tamsin’s hand and hurrying up onto the dais.

“What is happening?” Georgie asked her.

“I…I don’t know. He asked me to marry him,” Tamsin said, her head spinning.

“Oh, that’s wonderful,” Lavinia said with a brilliant smile. “Isn’t it?” she asked, almost as an afterthought.

“I didn’t answer. Oh, dear heavens. I didn’t say no, but it sort of sounded like I said no. I was just so overwhelmed.”

“Did you want to say yes?”

A tear spilled down her cheek. “I don’t know. I love him. I do. But I don’t understand how it would be possible.”

The crowd clapped as the Prince Regent finished his effusive introduction of Prince Heinrich, who then stepped forward.

“What is going on?” Nigel said, popping up at their elbows.

They all shushed him, trying to hear Prince Heinrich as he thanked the Prince Regent for the warm welcome and several other pleasantries until Tamsin thought that she might scream.

Then she caught Christian’s eye, and her pulse started pounding. He stood beside his uncle and brother, his hands clasped loosely behind his back, his entire demeanor…calm. There was a tension. Resignation, perhaps. But…something had happened.

What had he done?

Then what his uncle was saying finally started sinking in.

“I have the great pleasure tonight to announce the marriage of my nephew and heir.”

The crowd gasped, turning to each other with excited murmurs.

Tamsin’s heart thundered in her chest as Christian gave her a sad smile. Was she about to hear his uncle announce Christian’s marriage? Why would he want her to stay and listen to that?

Wait…did Prince Heinrich say heir?

Was Christian… She’d known he was the prince’s nephew, yes, but… What was happening?

She bit her lip to keep a sob from escaping.

“First, I am pleased to announce the upcoming marriage of my heir, Prince Conrad Josef, to Princess Sophia of Anhalt-Bernburg.”

The crowd cheered with enthusiasm. These were not their royals, of course. But a royal wedding of any kind was always exciting.

“But I thought the count was his heir,” someone murmured nearby.

Tamsin’s head jerked around, trying to find the source.

“What is it?” Georgie whispered at her side.

“Someone…someone said that Christian, that he—”

She had to go to him, though the words she’d heard still rang through her head.

He was the eldest brother, she was sure of it. Had he been Prince Heinrich’s heir? Would he have been sovereign prince after his uncle?

It seemed years before he was able to extricate himself and make his way back to her. He ignored all those trying to speak to him, ignored all the mamas with their eligible daughters, the men with their business schemes. He ignored them all but her.

When he reached her, he took her by the hand, ignoring the gasps and mutterings, and pulled her back into the antechamber.

The moment the door closed, she rounded on him.

“Christian, what is going on?”

He took her hands, drawing her down to one of the sofas that were spread throughout the room.

“You’re a prince? I heard someone say that they thought you were Prince Heinrich’s heir. Is that true?” she asked.

Christian took a deep breath and nodded. “Yes. I am. And yes, I was.”

“Oh, Christian,” she said, her breath leaving her in a rush. “What have you done?”

“Nothing that I wouldn’t do a thousand times over,” he said, bringing her hands up to kiss.

“But…you went through with it even though I hadn’t given you an answer. Even though it sounded as if I…” She shook her head, another tear falling. “It was so fast, I didn’t understand… I still don’t.”

He brushed the tear off her cheek. “As I said, liebste, it is all right. I made the choice I wished to make. I still have hope for us. But if you decide in the end you do not want me…” He shook his head with a gentle smile. “I still do not regret it. What I gave up was nothing if it meant a chance for a lifetime of love with you, however you wish that love to look.”

“It is not nothing, Christian. You gave up everything.”

“A small price to pay,” he said, looking at her with such love she could scarce bear it.

Her heart melted, but she had to know everything. “I thought it wasn’t possible. That even with his permission, your children were essentially disinherited.”

“That is true, in part. But…let’s just say we came to a compromise.”

She opened her mouth to speak again, but he raised a hand to stay her. “I came to an arrangement with my uncle. He will allow a morganatic marriage. In essence, we would determine what amount will be settled upon you and any children we might have before the wedding occurs. And my uncle has promised the contract will be generous. You and our children would not be permitted to share my title or gain an inheritance from my entitlements, but you would never want for anything.”

She frowned. That sounded not only reasonable but ordinary. Much like a settlement contract that anyone would have before their marriage. But… “You’re a prince?”

He grimaced. “In my country, children of legal equal marriages take the rank of their father. My father was a prince. And so Conrad and I should have been princes from birth. But because his marriage to my mother, who was made a countess several years after their marriage, was unequal, we shared her title once it was bestowed. However, after my parents’ deaths when it was evident my uncle would not have children of his own, my brother and I were elevated to the rank of prince and I, as the eldest, was named heir.”

“You…you would have ruled after your uncle?”

“Yes.”

She tried to draw in a breath, but her throat constricted. He’d given up a throne… “And now? If we marry?”

A light of hope sparked in his eyes. “I am still a prince, as well as Count of Rauchberg. Had our marriage been equal, our children would have shared my rank and been given the titles of prince or princess at birth. As the situation stands, that would not be permitted. They cannot share my title, nor can they inherit any holdings or income that are a part of my dynastic estates. But they would be legitimate and financially secure through the marriage settlement.”

She focused on breathing, trying to take it all in. “What else?” she prompted.

He gave her a soft smile. “Our children will be barred from the line of succession. And I stepped aside as my uncle’s heir in favor of my brother.”

Tamsin’s breath left her in a whoosh. “And he is marrying the princess, instead of you,” she said, the significance of Prince Conrad’s engagement just now dawning on her.

“Yes.”

“I…” A sharp hiccupping laugh escaped her lips, and she snapped them shut, covering her mouth with her hand. Christian, bless him, just let her be while she absorbed what had just transpired.

After a moment, she took a deep breath. “I don’t know what to say. I can’t believe you gave up your birthright for me.”

“I would have given up much more, mein Herz. I love you, Tamsin. I don’t need to rule. I just need you. If you’ll have me.”

She leaned in and kissed him, not caring if the servants gossiped or if someone walked in and saw them. They could all be damned. She had spent so long, her whole life, chasing after acceptance. Wanting to belong. Doing whatever she thought others wanted so they would treat her as their equal, as one of them. Bending over backward so she never stepped a foot out of place, followed every rule, every guideline. Accepted whatever crumbs she was given all in the hope that someday she would be accepted into the fold.

What a waste it had all been.

Those people would never care about her. They might invite her to their parties, but they’d still gossip about her behind their fans. Her son would be accepted. He was a duke, born to the role as she had not been. And for her… She already had the love of a wonderful group of friends. And the love of an incredible man she had never dared to hope for.

“I love you, too,” she said, her heart so full she could scarce breathe.

“Then…” he asked, his brows raised in question.

“My charities, my art…” she started.

“I want you to be happy, Tamsin. I know how important your work is to you. I would still prefer you remain Anonymous rather than expose your identity. For your safety. But I will support you no matter what you choose to do. As for the rest, though…I will understand if it is too much to give up.”

“Me?”

“If we marry, you’ll be giving up not only the freedom your widowhood gives you, but also your income from your former husband’s estate. As well as your title. As my wife, you’ll be simply Frau von Rauchberg.”

“I will have my wedding settlement from my first marriage. And the money from my art sales. As for my title…it hasn’t brought me a tenth of the joy that you have. It is not so much to give up to be yours , my lord. That is all I require. I would come to you without marriage if necessary. Truth be told, I would prefer it. Much less fuss,” she said with a laugh.

Christian laughed. “Perhaps, my love. Though I do prefer the marriage papers, at least for our children’s sake.”

“You do make a valid argument,” she said with a grin.

“Then you will marry me?”

She smiled up at him. “Yes, my lord, I will marry you.”

The words were hardly out of her mouth before his lips were on hers. He kissed her as if she were his very life, the answer to all his prayers. This. This was all the acceptance she ever needed. Someone who loved her for her, who supported her, who gave up more than he asked for. In the end, her own sacrifices did not seem so very much in the face of such love.

“Do you mind that our children will not be titled?” he asked when they finally pulled apart. His brow creased with worry. “I know it has been a burden in your own life.”

She shook her head. “The burden has been in trying to fit in where I am not wanted. Both before my marriage and after. Our children will be loved. And will never want for anything. And will have the freedom to marry where they will. What more could I ask for them? And for myself?”

He gave her a smile that warmed her to her toes and brushed a thumb across her cheek. “I cannot promise that I won’t seek advantageous marriages for them,” he said with a laugh. “But I can promise they will never be forced into anything they do not wish.”

“I suppose any father would do the same,” she said, thinking of her own father. Then she sobered a bit. “But what of James? His estates here?” She frowned, bombarded with new thoughts. “And where will we live? Your home and estates are in Gr ü nsteinberg, but with James’s here…”

Christian put his finger against her lips to stop the stream of words.

“It will take some careful management. But my estates run very well under the care of my managers, and I imagine they will continue to do so. I would like for you to see my home and spend time there as there will be times when my presence is required there. And I would not leave you for so long. But my family will also ensure my estates are looked after in my absence. There is no impediment to spending the bulk of our time here. Perhaps we can spend our summers in my country. I far prefer your winter weather,” he said with a wry smile.

She laughed. “That sounds reasonable. I should love to see your home.”

“As for young James…I will love him as I will my own should we be so blessed. I will be honored to be a father to him.”

Tamsin smiled. “Thank you, my lord.” Then she drew in a shaky breath. “You could have ruled. It is much to sacrifice.”

He shook his head. “It is much to gain. I only hesitated to lay down the burden of my inheritance because I could only do so if my brother then took it up. That he has done so, willingly, is a debt I can never repay.”

Tamsin tilted her head up to kiss him, hoping to soothe the pain he felt for his brother. They both owed him a debt. She hoped he would be able to find some happiness in his life as well. And as his new sister, she vowed to do what she could to ensure it.

As for her own happiness… She never would have believed she would go gladly to the marriage altar again. Only for this man. Only him. “I shall endeavor to safeguard your happiness, my lord, so that you may never regret your sacrifice. I can make no promises, though.”

He laughed and kissed her again. “I shall endeavor as well to ensure you never regret your sacrifices. And thank you. I would much prefer you do not promise me anything with regards to your behavior. I do not think my constitution can bear it. In fact, I will request the clergyman remove the word ‘obey’ from the vows. Just to be safe.”

Tamsin smiled up at him. “I will not argue with you on that point.”

Christian blinked at her with feigned shock. “I have never heard a sweeter phrase.”

“Come along, my lord,” she said, laughingly pulling him up. “I would be willing to wager a tidy sum that there are several pairs of ears plastered to that door.” She jerked her thumb at the door through which they had entered. “Let’s go put them out of their misery.”

“As you wish, meine Herzogin. And tomorrow, I shall pay a visit to your father. I do not want to wait a moment longer to make you mine.”

She let him draw her into his arms, wrapping her own about him. “Oh, I am already that, my lord. I have always been yours.”