The Light in Us

49. Wilder

49

Wilder

T eddy is snoring lightly, his face buried in my arm.

And on my other side, Rowan has his head tipped back. His glasses threaten to slip off his face, his laptop still glowing in front of him with the research he spent the whole night working on. He doesn’t move when I shift, carefully lifting the laptop away and replacing it with a blanket from the back of the couch.

Pack .

I need my pack, need them more than most. They’re my anchor, my family, what stops me from tipping over into that darkness all of the time, instead of just when it gets too much.

I’ve spent more time feral in the last week than I have in the past year.

My eyes don’t move from the door. I’m waiting for her to come home, tension coiled in every muscle.

My mate. A mate that I’ve spent very little time with, thanks to the other side of my sparkling personality.

Teddy shifts beside me. His words are sleepy. “They’re not back?”

“Not yet.” I wrap my arm around him, rub it gently. “Go back to sleep, Teddy bear.”

He doesn’t, though, He curls his legs up and we both wait together. “So, did Fallon really like the Wild Side?”

I slant him a narrow-eyed look. “I don’t know. But she didn’t run away screaming.”

I’m not entirely sure what happened. I’m semi-aware of what’s happening when the feral part of me takes over, but it’s more of a foggy day than clear sunshine.

Although… I could scent her. Something that happened while I was out of it made my mate slick . I can still almost taste her on my tongue, a memory that goes straight to my knot.

My breathing starts to deepen, darkness creeping in.

No. Back the hell off. She’s both of ours, asshole.

Shit. If I start losing control when all I’m doing is sitting around, I’m in a heap of fucking trouble.

“Jesus, Wild.” Teddy jerks upright. He sounds mortified. “Please tell me that’s not for me. I know I’m hot, and we’d do great things together, but I’m a one-alpha, one-beta omega.”

I spring upright as if my ass is on fire. Rowan jerks awake as I skitter across the room, cupping my cock over my jeans. My cheeks are burning. “Of course it’s not for you!”

“Awh,” Teddy offers me a shit-eating grin. “Is it for Fallon? That’s kind of adorable. A little teen-boy coded, but cute.”

“Can we please stop talking about this?” I growl, willing my erection to deflate as quickly as my ego. “And if we could stop using the word little to talk about my cock, I’d very much appreciate it.”

“I’m confused.” Rowan stretches, yawning. “Since when does Wilder have a little cock? I always assumed you had the goods, Wild. Feral alpha, feral cock. All that jazz.”

“I do not have a little cock!” I bellow. “Don’t put that shit out into the atmosphere. It’s bad juju!”

They both start snickering.

“Stop it,” I snap. “My cock is completely normal-sized. Not too big. Not too small. Just right.”

Teddy nudges Rowan. “You be Daddy Bear, and I’ll be Mommy Bear. Wild is clearly Baby Bear.”

They both collapse into laughter.

“Honestly,” I mutter. But Teddy is eyeing me even as he grips his stomach, and I pause, suspicion creeping in.

The little shit winks at me. “Has he gone now?”

Sneaky, sneaky omega. My mind is clear, my fading embarrassment the only unwelcome presence. “I love you, Ted.”

He sighs happily. “I know you do. Now please stop poking us in the eye with that damn thing and go and think filthy thoughts about your mate somewhere else.”

Rowan’s cheeks pink, and Teddy straightens, his mouth hanging open. “ Rowan Quill . Have you been thinking filthy thoughts about Wilder’s mate too? Without me?”

“Teddy,” I snap. But my eyes slide back to Rowan. He doesn’t look at me, grabbing for his laptop like it’s a security blanket. “Ro?”

He shifts, the color spreading down his neck. “It’s only because… I’m picking up echoes from Fox. That’s it.”

“You sure about that?” I ask, keeping my words soft. “Because you know it doesn’t matter within the pack.”

Our packs are an extension of us. It wouldn’t bother any of us if Fallon chose to be with Rowan or Teddy too. Or both.

Whatever she’s comfortable with.

Teddy sighs. “She fits under my arm.”

We both turn to him, confused, and he shrugs. “I’ve always fitted under your arm. Or Fox’s. Or Zeke’s. I’m smaller than Ro. But Fallon… she fits perfectly under my arm.”

I suddenly have a vision of a set of Russian dolls, largest to smallest.

He fiddles with the arm of the couch. “I want to protect her too, you know? And she’s really pretty. And a sweetheart. And I just…,”

Teddy glances at Ro, teeth sinking into his lip. He looks more uncertain at that moment than I’ve ever seen. “I know that she’d still be Pack, even if we weren’t together. But I’ve been wondering what it would be like. If she was part of us too.”

“Yeah,” Rowan rasps. They stare at each other. “Although you said it far better than I did.”

Teddy sniffs. “See? I told you you’d be head over heels for her.”

Rowan rolls his eyes. But a smile creeps over his lips. “You’re always right. But I’m definitely head over heels for you , Teddy Quill.”

Damn. They’re adorable.

The door slams, and the three of us spin to the doorway.

My breathing starts to speed up as Fallon pads into view. She’s kicked off her shoes, Zeke and Fox flanking her protectively as Teddy and Rowan jump up.

She’s almost swallowed up beneath Fox’s hoodie, her inky hair trailing down her body on either side in a tangled mess. My mate shifts on her feet. “I’m… back?”

The soft hesitant words are almost a question.

I stay where I am as Teddy and Rowan move over to her. Breathing the fresh, sweet scent of my mate in, trying to adjust.

But that darkness wants in, pushing and shoving against my brain, demanding entry. He knows she’s here, too, and he wants her.

Mate.

Not now , I will desperately. Just give me a damn fucking minute .

Fallon’s eyes fix on me, wide and sweet and questioning. “Wilder?”

She takes a step, and I hold up my hand, hating myself for stopping her. I can feel my damn lip curling up, dropping my face as I pant through the effort of holding my feral side at bay. “Just – just give me a minute, love.”

“Fallon,” Fox murmurs soothingly. “Why don’t we go to the kitchen? He just needs to adjust.”

He murmurs something else, and a growl ripples from me, the tension ratcheting up.

But my mate takes another step. Her brow furrows, as if she can see the struggle between us. “But he’s hurting .”

I don’t know how she can sense the rippling pain inside my body as two halves fight for dominance. The scent-matching, perhaps.

“Fallon.” I groan her name. “ Go .”

Fallon holds my eyes. I can feel them changing, flickering between electric blue and something wilder, brighter.

“It’s okay,” she whispers. “Let him in.”

“Oh, shit,” someone mutters.

My mate holds out her hand.

And I lose myself.