The Light in Us

50. Fallon

50

Fallon

I can see the pain in his face as it contorts. Wilder’s eyes flicker from human to inhuman, too quickly for me to track.

It’s like he’s fighting with himself . Like he’s hurting on the inside, too.

I know what that feels like.

“Fallon,” Fox whispers. “I need you to back up.”

A slow, curling growl comes from Wilder’s mouth as Fox touches my shoulder. Fox’s hand drops. “Now, Fallon.”

Another growl.

But I shake my head, edging forward. “But he’s hurting.”

He’s pushing down this part of himself for my sake, and he doesn’t need to. I know he’s not going to hurt me.

Wilder is my mate. And maybe he needs to trust in himself a little more.

Carefully, I hold out my hand. Wilder’s head tilts to the side warily.

“It’s okay,” I whisper. “Let him in.”

His eyes flash molten gold.

Behind me, Teddy inhales. “Oh, shit.”

“Back up,” Fox snaps. “Give them space.”

I’m caught in those eyes. Wilder takes a step forward. Another, his gait prowling.

He looks… bigger. And I swallow. “What do I do?”

Nice one, Fallon. Bring out the feral alpha and then start asking questions.

“Don’t run,” Teddy breathes to the side of me. “Don’t move .”

“Why?” My voice is a whisper, my gaze locked on Wilder.

“Because he’ll chase.”

Something flickers in my chest at that. Something primal.

My hand raises to splay across my stomach as Wilder tracks the movement, his head tilted and eyes glittering. He releases a low, almost pained grunt.

As if he can sense how much it hurts.

“We’ll get him,” Zeke murmurs. He and Fox come up behind me, Wilder baring his teeth at them in response. “Don’t worry.”

But I’m not worried. I’m curious . And maybe a little… excited.

Oh, god.

Wilder’s nostrils flare.

“Wait.” I throw my hand out, not looking away. “Please. He… this is part of him. He can’t keep it trapped away.”

It’ll consume him.

I can feel the alphas behind me silently debating as Wilder edges closer, his gaze flicking between us.

Slowly, I shake my head. “Just let him do what he needs to. He just wants…,”

Me. He just wants me.

And as I think it, Wilder lunges .

Strong arms band around my back, taking me off my feet. The floor disappears beneath me as he snatches me up with a roar.

I can hear yelling behind us as he takes off. Wilder is impossibly fast as he grips me tightly, darting up the stairs with me over his damn shoulder like some sort of trophy.

Oh, fuck.

I’m gasping as he heads through a door and places me down, surprisingly gentle. “ Wilder .”

Footsteps. More shouting.

“I’m okay!” I yell, and he flinches back. I don’t look away from my mate. “Just give us a minute!”

This is his room. It’s drenched with him, with vanilla and toffee notes, and I breathe in, trying to relax. My hands curl into soft bedding as I swallow.

He just… watches me.

“Okay,” I whisper. To myself, and to him. “I’m here, Wilder. What do you need?”

My mate uncoils his body in a loose, almost feline movement as if he can understand me. I lose my breath as he nudges me down, following me into the bedding as he presses himself against me.

He’s not wearing a shirt. Heat floods my body as I’m pinned beneath him and he drops his face to my neck, inhaling. “ Oh .”

This… this is nice.

He’s scent-marking me. Wilder rubs himself against my neck as my breathing speeds up. This is what he did before.

Comfort. That’s what it feels like. And after a night spent in that horrible, bright room, it’s what I need.

As if he knows, Wilder cages me, his arms on either side of my face. Boxing me in. The blinds are closed, creating the feel of a small, cozy space.

Safe.

“Yes,” I breathe, watching him. “This is what I needed. This is…good.”

I raise my hands, pressing them over his back as he rumbles against me. His skin is heat and silk, muscles flexing as he pushes himself up onto his elbows.

His golden eyes flicker to my mouth.

And heat, glorious, prickling heat floods my body. Pushing the pain out.

I don’t know if he can understand me. But I tilt my face in a silent offering and wait.

Fingers curl around my throat, stroking the skin gently. But he holds me as his lips cover mine, soft but unyielding as he swallows my moan.

His approving growl, directly against my mouth, makes my toes curl.

With him pressed against me, I don’t move. I can’t, as Wilder shifts. His lips travel across my face, my cheek, down my neck.

I’ve never felt anything like it. There’s nothing cold about this. This is pure fire, racing through my limbs as I shift beneath him. Searching for more as I tilt my head and try to follow him, a small complaint sounding in my throat. “More.”

When his hand pushes up underneath my dress, beneath Fox’s hoodie, I see stars.

Wilder spreads out his hand, almost covering my stomach as he strokes my skin, still holding my neck. His thumb brushes the hollow in my throat as his fingers glide over my belly.

Petting me. He’s… petting me.

My bones turn to mush, sinking down into his bedding as he watches every flicker on my face.

Not enough.

My scent wraps around us, mixing with Wilder’s in the air as he breathes in.

His eyes flicker again. Gold, to blue, to gold.

Wilder tugs his hand out from beneath my clothing, pulls his hand from my throat, and I whimper at the loss of contact. But he only moves his hands to the bottom of Fox’s hoodie.

The tearing sound rips through the room, and my eyes widen as he rips it straight up the middle without blinking.

Wilder looks down at my blue dress and snarls.

I hate that dress too.

I hold my breath as his hands lower. He doesn’t stop, doesn’t wait, doesn’t ask.

He rips it from my body, baring me to him.

My bare breasts rise and fall, my nipples pebbling as I still. Cool air sweeps over my skin.

And Wilder… his eyes travel over my body as if he can’t imagine anything more fascinating. The noise he makes is pure pleasure.

An alpha male, inspecting his mate.

My moan locks inside my throat as he puts his hands on me. He starts with my legs, his hands sweeping over them. Higher. He fits his hands perfectly into the indents of my hips, moves them up to cover my breasts and squeeze.

I twist my hips. My slick has already started, wet heat between my legs as I voicelessly plead with my mate.

But he’s already shifting down, pushing my legs apart.

At the first, hot swipe of his tongue, I come undone. My cry echoes into the room, the burst of slick making Wilder growl directly into my pussy.

Woah. Zero to seven hundred and fifty.

He slips his hands beneath my ass, lifting my hips into the air and feasting. I kick my legs into the air, my mate’s grip unrelenting. He doesn’t let me move an inch, and I buck as his tongue thrusts directly into my pussy, hot and thick and holy fuck, if this is the start, what will his knot feel like—

My thoughts become jumbled as he holds me in place. My hands find their way into his hair, and when I tug, Wilder pushes his head toward me in silent request for more. My hold tightens as he thrusts faster with his mouth, my pussy riding his face as he drags me impossibly closer.

His name is a prayer and a scream on my lips. “ Wilder !”

I soak his face, thrashing and begging, deep in my throat as he holds me steady.

Both of them are breathing heavily when he sets me down. He chases me up the bed, a hum in his throat, and I wait. I can feel him, feel the heaviness of his cock as it pushes against my bare skin inside his jeans.

I swallow. I’m not sure I’m completely ready for that.

But Wilder only rolls me to the side, curling himself around me. Warm breath huffs against my neck as he drags me in until our bodies are pressed together.

His hand slips over my stomach again, gently stroking.

But he doesn’t move. Doesn’t do anything else.

He just… holds me.

My hand raises to stroke along his arm. A rumbling purr comes from his throat.

I fall into a half-doze, breathing in the comforting scent of him against me. When he shifts, putting space between us, I roll over to face him.

This is the more human side of Wilder. Blue-eyed, no trace of gold to be seen. He stares at me, his mouth opening and closing. “Fallon. I… fuck. I’m so sorry. I don’t know what to say.”

I reach my hand up to stroke his cheek. “He only wanted to help, I think.”

Wilder swallows, his eyes searching my face. “And – did it—,”

I nod. I didn’t need to think. Or worry. Just feel.

“He’s a part of you,” I murmur. Almost shy, I place my hand over his chest, feeling his heartbeat. “I don’t mind if he comes out, Wilder. As long as I get both of you.”

He closes his eyes. “You have me. But I’d like to spend some time with you without him, at some point.”

I have to smile at the irritation in his voice. “We have time.”

Now I’m here. With them.

Wilder groans. “God. I can taste you. I can even… kind of remember it. But it’s fuzzy.”

Flushing, I duck my head. “He didn’t do anything else.”

And I’m glad. Because that first time… that belongs to Wilder and I. And I have to wonder if part of that side of him knew it.

His lips brush my forehead. “Like you said. We have time.”