The One Who Holds Me (Sovereign Love #4)

12. Olanna

12

OLANNA

THEN

“ B abe, what do you think about my painting so far?” I turn my board around to show Alex, but instead of the ooh and ahh reaction I was hoping for, he shields his eyes with his hands and turns his face away.

“Hey, I’m not supposed to see your painting until the end. Don’t ruin the surprise for me,” he says with his back to me, and I roll my eyes.

“Come on, don’t be like that. I really need you to see it.”

“No, we’re sticking to the rules this time.”

“Okay, fine.” I turn my paint board back around to face me. “If you want to follow the rules, then okay.” I sip on my glass of non-alcoholic wine before placing the glass on the table in front of us.

Alex sticks his tongue out at me and then continues with his painting. The president of Ignite recommended this sip and paint event when Alex and I told him about our A-Z list. The first session involved us all trying to draw a fruit bowl. For the second session, the instructor asked us to focus on individual awareness and growth by playing our favorite music and painting the first thing that comes to mind.

The instructor also told us not to share the painting with anyone else until the very end and to prevent anyone from cheating, we’re using paint boards with shields on the sides. While Alex is the patient one out of the two of us, I can’t help myself.

“Can I see your painting?” I crane my neck toward him, but he turns his board away from me.

“No, you can’t. Stay right there.” He points his paintbrush at me, but instead of deterring me like he intended, his action draws a chuckle from my lips.

“You think I’m scared of getting paint on my clothes? Well, think again, mister.” I step down from my stool, but Alex raises his hand to alert the instructor’s attention and I sit back down.

“Oh, you’re such a tattletale.” I squint at him and he laughs.

“You’re no fun.” I kiss my teeth and tighten my apron around my neck and waist.

“Oh, I’m sure you don’t mean that,” he responds with a confidence I love.

“Of course, I don’t.” I send him a sheepish smile before going back to my painting. My gaze sweeps through the room as I watch the other people working on their paintings. There’s a mother-daughter duo, a group of three best friends and a husband and wife who could be in their late twenties.

A sip and paint date has been on my to-do list with Danielle and India since freshman year, but it’s much better that I’m doing it with the man I love. Yes, I know I just said love and I mean it. It has taken me seven months to fully accept that my feelings toward Alex go deeper than surface level. We connect in a way I’ve never connected with anyone before, and that is something I can’t even explain.

“What’s the best thing you love about our relationship?” I ask, and he turns his head to meet my gaze.

“It’s simple. You get me. I get you. You’re my best friend.”

“Aww.” My smile probably makes me look like a fool now, but I don’t even care. “You’re so sweet.”

“Well.” He pats his shoulders and clears his throat. “A beautiful young lady has told me that a lot over the last seven months, so I believe you.” He winks at me, and I playfully push his arm.

When we’re done with our painting, the instructor, a twenty-something year old brunette woman, goes round the room asking us to showcase our paintings and talk about the inspiration for it.

When it’s Alex’s turn, he stands and takes off his apron before clearing his throat. “Hi everyone. My name is Alex, and this painting is dedicated to someone who has made a huge impact in my life since the first day I set my eyes on her.”

My cheeks warm up as I struggle to contain my smile. He looks at me and finally turns the painting around to show me. It’s a faceless painting, but with all the right features to confirm it is in fact me. He included my favorite hoop earrings, my burgundy locs, and the words Girl Boss written in cursive writing at the top.

Alex turns to the class and continues talking. “My girlfriend over here is called Olanna, and she loves teasing me about using clichés to express my feelings, so this public display might make her wish the earth would open up and swallow her.” A wave of laughter passes across the room before he turns to look at me again.

“But when I tell you that you’ve been a blessing to me, I mean that in every sense of the word. You’re so incredibly beautiful, so strong, so resilient, and even though the last few years have been hard on you, you still grace everyone around with your lovely smile. Thank you for seven months of being my best friend and making me believe I can do anything. I love you.”

“Aww.” The word comes out of the crowd, followed by a round of applause.

I’m not even sure when I left my seat and threw my arms around him in a tight hug, but he plants a kiss on my lips and wipes the tears on my face I didn’t even realize were there.

“Now I feel embarrassed to show my painting.” We all laugh as I brace myself to showcase mine. I turn the paint board around, so everyone can see. It’s more of a cartoon version of Alex and I holding hands on a sunny day, with lots of blue clouds, green grass and love hearts scattered around.

“I did a similar drawing like this when I was ten years old because I was fortunate enough to grow up in a functional family with a mom and dad who loved each other.” I sigh before continuing. “Unfortunately, I lost my mom two years ago, but one thing I can take away from her incredible life is that true love is possible. I’m a hopeless romantic and I’m incredibly blessed to see that God has smiled on me like this.” I turn to look at Alex, who walks up to me and squeezes my hand, something I definitely needed.

“Thank you, Alex, for being an answered prayer and for not destroying my belief in true love. I love you.” I lean in and kiss him again as the crowd applauds.

After the event, we stopped by an Italian restaurant as I’ve been craving some really good pasta for a long time. The food was delicious, the music and atmosphere set a romantic scene, and it was a perfect way to end the evening. Well, it would’ve been the perfect end if I didn’t notice the change in Alex’s mood during our drive back home.

In between the silences in the car, we usually either sing along to the music playing, or talk about anything and everything. But today is different because during these pauses he sends me glances and opens his mouth, as if he wants to say something, but when I turn to look at him, he just smiles and focuses on the road again.

“Everything okay, babe?” I reach for his free hand that’s not on the steering wheel, but before he can respond, my attention switches to the constant buzzing on my phone. Text message notifications from Manny chime in, asking me if I’m okay and if I’m back home from my date yet.

Since I told him about my relationship with Alex back in March, he has been checking in constantly to make sure Alex is still treating me like the gentleman I’ve made him out to be. Every time we have a conversation about Alex, Manny makes it his duty to remind me that if Alex ever breaks my heart, he’ll break his face.

At first, I worried about the possibility of that happening because I know Manny is not bluffing. But after the last seven months and the amazing day Alex and I had today, I have nothing to worry about. He’s my one.

“Sorry, it’s just Manny checking on me,” I say after sending a quick reply and putting my phone away.

“No need to apologize. He cares about you.”

I nod. “He sure does. That’s why I can’t wait for Manny and my dad to meet you. When they see how lovely you are, it’ll ease any worries or reservations they have.” I relax in my seat and silence stretches again between us before I speak again. “By the way, I forgot to tell you I finally contacted the bereavement counselor.”

“Really?” He glances at me briefly, a smile crossing his face.

“Yeah, I have my first session next week. I’m very nervous, but I’ve been doing a lot of research and apparently many people find it useful, so it won’t hurt trying.” It took me six months to decide, but at least I got there.

“That’s my girl.” He reaches for my hand and squeezes. “I’m so proud of you.”

Even though he’s smiling and responding to my questions, there’s still something off about his body language I can’t put my finger on, so I push one last time. “Alex, are you sure everything is okay? You’ve been quiet since we left the restaurant.”

This time, he sighs and says, “Yeah, sorry, babe. There’s just a lot on my mind right now.”

“Like what?” I prod some more. Was it something I said or did?

“Erm…it’s my dad. He has some health challenges, so I need to go home and visit them this weekend,” he says without looking at me.

“Oh, I’m sorry to hear that.” I sit up and lean toward him. “I’ll be praying for him.”

“And just say a prayer for me too while you’re at it, will you?” he adds in with a smile.

“Of course. Thanks for sharing with me. I appreciate it.” His free hand finds mine again and we don’t let go of each other for the rest of our journey.